Life After Living

Chapter Two

Lying on the floor, I've come undone
~ Undone, Weexer

"Good, you're awake," Molly Weasley said, appearing behind Ron. "Come down for breakfast."

"I'm not hungry."

"You'll come down anyway." From the tone in Mrs. Weasley's voice, Harry knew that if he defied her he would suffer some serious consequences. She had been the only mother he had ever really known, and she treated him like a son. He had to respect her for that. His stomach growled.

He stood and followed Mrs. Weasley and Ron downstairs. The basement kitchen was bustling with Weasleys. Arthur Weasley sat at the table discussing a story with his son Bill Weasley. Ginny was arguing with the twins, George and Fred Weasley. "Harry!" Ginny exclaimed as he entered the kitchen. "Happy Birthday!"

Harry just scowled.

"Good morning, Harry," Mr. Weasley said. "How does it feel to be sixteen?"

"It doesn't." The worried glances exchanged between the Weasley clan did not go unnoticed by Harry. Sixteen didn't really mean anything to him. It wasn't such a big deal.

"Dumbledore should be here shortly," Mrs. Weasley said, setting breakfast down in front of Harry with a flick of her wand. "Eat." Harry obeyed. The Weasley children were ushered out of the kitchen. True enough to Mrs. Weasley's word, Dumbledore emerged from the fireplace as Harry was sinking his teeth into a burnt piece of toast.

"Welcome, Professor Dumbledore!" Mr. Weasley stood and greeted the Hogwarts Headmaster who greeted the Weasley parents in return. Then, with a hurried shuffle, Mr. And Mrs. Weasley were out of the kitchen as well.

"Hello, Harry," Dumbledore said quietly.

"Hello, Professor Dumbledore," Harry answered. He had not bothered to stand up at the entrance of his mentor. Dumbledore sat down across from him and stared at Harry for a few moments before speaking.

"We were worried about you," Dumbledore said finally. "This is not the time to be hiding. I sent you to your aunt and uncle's house to keep you safe, not to wither away in your room."

"What else was I suppose to do there, learn to sew?"

"Prepare yourself, Harry. Rough times are coming."

"None of it matters to me anymore."

Dumbledore was silent for a minute. Then he spoke quietly. "He wouldn't want it to be this way, Harry. Don't you think he would've wanted you to be strong; to continue the fight?"

"Well, I guess we'll never know, will we?" With that, Harry stood up and left the kitchen, Dumbledore calling after him.

~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~-~

He spent the rest of the day in he and Ron's room. Ron made several attempts to communicate with him, but his efforts were futile. He eventually wandered off and Harry was left alone. It had to have been only midmorning when he got back in bed. He slept again. "Ronald Weasley, you'll wake him up!" were ironically the words that did wake him up.

"But he's been sleeping all day, Mum!" He heard Ron say. "Dad says that's a sign of depression." They were speaking in hushed voices. Harry sat up in bed.

"You let him alone, do you hear me?"

"Yes, Mum."

"Don't go in there!"

"Can I at least get a book to read since I can't do anything else in this house?" There was no answer, just the sound of feet receding down the hallway. There a slight squeak as Ron opened the door to their room and entered. "Oh, did we wake you?" Ron smirked. "Pity that." Harry scowled. "I'll just fetch a book and leave you be."

Don't go, Harry thought for a brief second. He was then confused as to where that thought has come from. He had missed his friend. His anger was quickly coming back in waves, though. "We do have a bath in the house, you know," Ron said as he headed towards the door book in hand. "You're bordering on toxic."

"Gosh, thanks."

"Just telling it like it is, mate." Ron turned to leave, but stopped. He looked back at Harry. "It wasn't your fault. I thought we already went over that."

"I didn't ask for your opinion." Harry looked away.

"Well, you got it anyway didn't you. Look, Harry--"

"I don't care," Harry said flatly, cutting Ron off.

"Well you should!" Harry looked back at his friend. "Sirius would be ashamed at how you're acting."

"Don't you dare..." Harry growled.

"Oh, but I do." Harry was out of the bed so fast Ron dropped his book. "Y- You're acting like a child, Harry." Ron stooped to pick up his book.

Beneath his fuming thoughts, Harry knew Ron was just egging him on. None of it mattered, though. "But you weren't there were you? Laughing your ass off in another room, weren't you?"

"Harry, I--"

"I took us there didn't I? I led everyone there. I let them kill Sirius. I should have been the one to die!" Harry had advanced and was now wagging his finger in Ron's face. Ron spoke Harry's name again, but Harry was yelling now. "What more do I have to pay? How many more people will have to die? Why not just give me over to him? Voldemort can have me!" The door was opening behind them.

Ron hadn't expected Harry's reaction. He reached forward and put his hand on Harry's arm, hoping to calm his friend. Harry's eyes blazed. He shook Ron's hand off and pushed with all his might against Ron's shoulders sending the redhead crashing into the wall. "Harry!" It was Ginny in the doorway.

Harry had grabbed Ron's shirt and was seconds away from slugging his best friend. At Ginny's scream he blinked and saw pain in his friend's eyes. "Ron." It came out in a choke as the tears rushed to Harry's eyes. What had he done? He backed away.

"Harry, I'm okay." There was only sympathy in Ron's voice. Footsteps were coming down the hall at a run. Harry covered his eyes with his hands. The tears were coming full force. All the tears he had been holding inside that summer came rushing out of him with bitter sobs. "Harry." Arms were wrapping around him.

"Ron--" It was Mrs. Weasley.

"Get out," the arms around him spoke.

"Ronald--"

"I said get out!" Ron let go of Harry and slammed the door in his family's faces.

Harry crumpled to the floor. Ron was beside him again in an instant; arms back around Harry as the sobs rushed forth. "So-- Sorry--" Harry managed between sobs.

"It's okay, Harry. It's okay. Not a scratch on me." But there were sure to be bruises on Ron's shoulders. "Just let it out." Harry couldn't have stopped the tears and sobs if he'd wanted to. They came like a tidal wave, crashing against Ron's shoulder. Ron didn't care that his shirt was becoming soaked.

It seemed like hours that they sat there. Harry's sobs finally subsided but the tears still came. Ron's shoulder was completely soaked. Harry came back to himself slowly. Ron was stroking his hair softly. Harry realized that he'd tangled up his own fingers into Ron's longer, red hair. He suddenly felt very awkward. He pulled his fingers out of Ron's hair and sat up. Ron blinked, resurfacing from his thoughts. "I'm sorry," Harry managed.

"It's okay," Ron smiled. He looked at his wet shoulder. "I mean, I might catch pneumonia, but otherwise..." Harry couldn't help but smile, meek as it was. "There you go. I knew there had to be some hope for you. Ron brushed a lock of hair out of Harry's eyes, revealing the scar on Harry's forehead.

Harry looked away. "I don't know what came over me."

"I do." Ron stood up and held his hand out for his friend. He pulled Harry up. "You've lost someone very important to you. He was the closet thing you've ever had to family, Harry. Don't think none of us understand."

"I know."

"We're all grieving his loss. Not as much as you maybe, but we are. Lupin has been a wreck this summer." Harry nodded understanding.

"It's still my fault."

"I'm not going to argue with you about that anymore. You might attack me again." Harry was horrified, but Ron just laughed. "Sometimes you just have to get it out of your system, eh?" Ron patted his friend on the shoulder. "Now I was serious about that bath. You stink."

"Yeah, yeah." Harry gave a meek smile again. He moved towards the door. With hand on the knob he looked back at his friend. "Thank you, Ron."

"Anytime," Ron smiled. He had pulled his shirt off and was pulling another one out of the drawer. Harry turned away, not wanting to look a second longer at the bruises rising on Ron's shoulders.