The Freudian Factor

I wake up in a strange place. And my head is funny. Err, I feel funny. And can't think properly. Of course this whole time my eyes are shut cause I am afraid to open them. I know this is not my bed. This does not sound like my room.
I have to pee.
Then I hear voices. Not the type of voices you hear when your crazy though, real ones.

"Madam Pomfrey, here is the potion," a voice said. A man.
A female voice answered him. " Thank-you Professor." the second voice said. Madame Pomfrey, I presume.
"And you believe this one will wake her up?" said a third voice.
Another man.

She didn't say anything, so I guess she nodded.
Then I decide to open my eyes in case they are talking about me, cause if a 'potion' is what I think it is, I don't want them shoving it down my throat.

So I do.
Ouch.
It is bright in here.
Ooh, the bed is fluffy.

I see the men and woman coming over to me. " You have awakened!" she exclaims.
" Are you sure?" I manage to say.

I'm not sure what to make of this situation.
I'm obviously crazy. This cannot be real. No. That is not a potion and
I am not in this bed and that is not Professor Dumbledore and that is
not Professor Sna....

I know my mouth is now hanging open.
I sit straight up in this bed and scrunch as far back as I can without falling out.
Madame Pomfrey and Professor Dumbledore look at me concerned.

Professor Snape just scowls.
I scowl back.
Dumbledore smiles. I glare at him.

"What is your name, my dear?" he asks.
I think for a minute. I could mess with their heads. Make them think I am the lost daughter of someone or other. But Dumbledore would know. He always knows. Knows stuff. Plus it would not be very nice.

"Well, she is obviously American," said Snape.
"Obviously," I say in my best sarcastic tone. He glares hard.

I grin.

I look at Dumbledore. He starts to speak. " My name is...." I cut him off. " I know your name. Do you know mine?"

" Impudent child..." I hear Snape mutter.
Pomfrey gave him a look. So did I.

Another old lady walks in. McGonagall.
"Albus, how is the girl?" she says and then sees me.

"Well," he says with a twinkle in his eye, "but has a great deal of trouble telling us her name. Would you like to try?"
She gives him a look and looks at me. "What is your name, young lady?"

I grin, again.
"Cold be hand and heart and bone,
and cold be sleep under stone:
Never more to wake on stony bed,
never, till the Sun fails and Moon is dead."

Wow. I think I disturbed them with that. Who knew quoting Tolkien could scare people?

"Come now, telling us your name can't be that hard," said Dumbledore. Right.

But I am having too much fun.

Snape is pissed. I wonder why.
"Oh, for gods sake just tell us," he growls.
"Severus!" says McGonagall. She is shocked. I'm not.

"You didn't say 'please'!" I say in a singsong voice.
I am having fun.

He is starting to change colors.

Dumbledore steps in before Snape gets any ideas of trying to strangle me.

"Please tell us your name." He says it nicely.

"My name is Rachel."
I smile sweetly at Snape. He scowls. I wonder if he knows any other facial expressions.

"Thank you. Now Rachel, please tell us where you are from."

I wonder if I can make Snape explode. But he wouldn't. Not in front of company.

"Home is behind the world ahead," I say.
I'm not sure I am making sense, even to me. I'm still a little fuzzy.

Dumbledore nods his head.
McGonagall steps toward him. She whispers to him, " Is she sane?"
"Of course! She is as sane as you or I," Dumbledore says.
Snape mutters something again. McGonagall looks sharply at him and Dumbledore says, "What's that, Severus? I didn't quite
catch that."

Snape snarls, "I have papers to correct," and leaves in a huff, billowing robes and all.

I know what he said. It wasn't very nice.

"Is he always like that?" I ask.
"Yes, unfortunately."
"So he has just got two buttons? Angry and more angry?" I say
"No," says Dumbledore. " His buttons are just stuck on angry, and anything that associates with that emotion."

I smile. He understands.

McGonagall just looks at us.

It's a Muggle thing.

To be continued