What Connected Us All

An Elixir

He is waiting for Farren when she reaches the common room, descending from the girl's dormitory. His hands are in his jean pockets and he appears broad, casual, young--at his prime. No one of the male gender should be allowed to look that good. Imagine the problems it could create with so many girls out there who are less cynical than Farren?

"May I ask where you're taking me?" she says to Sirius.

"Ren for the last time, you'll see in a minute."

The girl grumbles, flipping her hair angry in an angry motion. "I don't like surprises."

Sirius laughs and it is bark-like; just as loud as her own. "Are you sure you won't be cold? We're going outside, onto the grounds."

Farren peers down at the long, flowery skirt and blouse. "You don't like it?" she toys.

"Well yes, I do. But ideally I want you wearing nothing, so I am a tad biased."

"I say," Farren adopts a tone of mock indignity. "Are you suggesting that you would like to see me stark naked, Mister Black?"

He grins. "Forgive me, Miss Graham. But would you have me lie?"

"Heaven's no."

Farren strides past him and Sirius's eyes follow accordingly. "I would have you ask like a proper gentleman, then oblige."

She grins to herself as she walks with her back turned to the portrait hole.

Sirius manages to catch up. "Do you know how maddening you are?"

"Me? Maddening? But whatever can you mean...?"

The smile has disappeared. "It worries me. You'll get yourself into trouble one day."

Something cold flickers in her lungs, robbing her temporarily of breath.

"Yes," Farren says softly, not entirely certain Sirius hears or that she intends him to.

They turn to a book shelf that is propped against a wall. But, when he removes a large orange book, the wooden structure begins to move inward, revealing a passage way.

"How is it that you know every bloody trick to this castle?"

The staircase looks as if it's endless. Farren's shoes make delicate sounds against the stone. She wishes it were more bold and loud.

"I am afraid that is classified information which you must earn, Ren."

"And how do I go about doing that."

"Oh I'm sure you can think of something."

Farren pretends not to understand this innuendo. "Like waxing your broomstick, for example?"

He stops suddenly. She does not react quickly enough; and Sirius only barely manages to keep her feet on the ground, grinning. "You could call it that."

A laugh escapes Farren and it echoes shrilly.

"Sorry," she murmurs into hands she'd clamped over her mouth.

The walk to the grounds is a long and very cautious one (since they are, of course, students out of bed and past curfew). When their destination is finally reached, Farren regrets not having listened to Sirius. She is shivering, but tries to do so quietly and without him noticing.

"Are you going to tell me what we're doing here?"

"Going into the forest."

"The f-forest? Are you m-mental?"

Her attempts to hide the shivering fail miserably and Sirius hands over his jacket; reprimanding her for not having heeded his word. She, in turn, points out that it is really his fault for bringing her out there.

The other Marauders are waiting for them on the outskirts of the wildly growing trees.

James beams at them. As Farren passes by, he winks.

Is it her imagination or does Remus look paler than usual? And the expression he wears is that of a man who might be sick at any moment.

"Sirius, I need to talk to you," he says in a harsh tone that is very unlike him.

Sirius agrees and the two boys move further away for privacy.

James tries to engage Farren in conversation.

"Sorry about the poor conditions, but Sirius insisted on you coming."

"Yes," she says quickly, straining to hear the other conversation.

"...Moony I swear she'll be gone before the clouds even start clear up."

"And you know Sirius: he generally gets what he wants."

"...I just thought it would be fun if--"

Sirius's words are drowned out by the hiss of Remus's retort. But Farren cannot hear it because now James has given her up as a bad job and moved on to Peter.

"Shall I go get the man of the hour, then?" asks Sirius, sauntering back with a peaky and still unconvinced Lupin beside him.

Peter and James voice their zealous agreement.

With one last grin exchanged with James, Sirius disappears into the trees.

Farren has a strange desire to run after him. When she looks up into the sky to busy herself, she notices there are indeed heavy clouds. When she was little Farren believed, quite whole-heartedly, that cloud formations were messages sent to her by the Gods and Goddesses. But after a boy in her primary school had said a cloud she'd taken to be an arrowed heart was in actuality male genitalia, Farren gave the up on the fantasy.

"You're different from the rest," says a voice, intruding on her solidarity.

Lupin has moved in beside Farren silently and without her notice.

"What do you mean?"

"From the other girls... He doesn't talk about you. And the one time James tried to bring you up in a joke, they rowed."

Something slides into place in Farren's mind. She remembers the day James had spoken with her privately. A sudden rush of affection for Sirius bursts inside her.

"Do you not like me, Remus?"

He looks momentarily perplexed. But then understanding floods his features. "No, no. It's not like that at all, Ren. Sirius was..." He struggles to find the right words. "It was just very foolish of him to bring you tonight. It is very dangerous... What Sirius could have been thinking--" But Lupin stops himself, not wishing to speak ill of his friend.

Loud noises suddenly sound from within the forest. Noises that are unmistakably heavy feet pounding on the hard ground--

No, wait. It couldn't possibly be feet: there are too many. Four paws? Or hooves? Either way there seemed to be a massive animal (or beast) charging straight toward them. Farren voices her concern, sounding rather more panicky than she'd have liked.

But instead of breaking out in alarm the two boys only smile.

"We know," says Peter conspiratorially.

Farren wants to kick him.

"It's okay, Ren," interjects Lupin. "It's a friend of--"

Something enormous collides with the small girl and sends her flying toward the ground.

She lands sprawled, an enormous black dog straddling her.

There is a moment of panic in which Farren fears whether the dog will still attack. But then he is licking her with a lolling pink tongue.

She laughs, all restraint forgotten. If there is one thing Farren loves, it is animals of all kinds.

"Where in the world did you come from?" She sits up, attempting to pet his fur. It is uncommonly silky.

But the dog is unintentionally knocking her back in his enthusiasm. It's massive tail whacks between her knees, promising a nice bruise when morning came.

"We... found him years ago while exploring."

Farren only distantly realizes she should be worried of the stray having some sort of disease. She cannot care too much.

"What's his name?"

The boys pause.

"Snuffles," Remus answers, leering uncharacteristically .

The dog stops his incessant liking to look up at Lupin as if angry.

"That's a pansy name for such a massive dog," Farren declares.

The animal responds appreciatively, resuming the licking on her face now.

She giggles, pushing away gently. "I don't think Sirius would appreciate it if you went further with me than he has, Snuffles."

The boys erupt into laughter and don't stop for several minutes.

Farren hadn't expected the joke to be that funny, but is pleased none-the-less.

"Where is Sirius anyway? He's missing out on the all the fun."

"He'll be back sooner or later," James responds, still grinning.

"Sooner rather than later, I expect," says Remus pointedly.

Farren manages to stand, still petting the enigmatic dog . "Oh he is quite adorable," she admits. "Big dogs are one of my soft spots."

Then Snuffles is tugging at Sirius' jacket, attempting to pull her somewhere. Farren obliges until they reach the breach between the grounds and forbidden forest.

"Go on. I think he wants to take you to Sirius."

She hesitates, debating whether to concoct a manner of evasion.

But eventually, not wanting to loose face, Farren follows.

With every passing second she grips the dogs fur more tightly. This, however, is no comfort. Her pulse quickens; beating against her neck like a trapped thing. .

"I don't like this," she says to the empty air. "Can't we hurry, Snuffles?"

To her utter amazement the dog speeds up considerably.

The moment they reach open air Farren lets out a breath she'd unknowingly been holding.

She examines her surroundings after recovering a little. The lake is feet away, just as beautiful in the moonlight as it is in the sun.

Snuffles is barking, indicating she should come to stand beside him.

The night is crisp. And though it is a lake rather than an ocean, a distant part of Farren is reminded of summers spent beside the Atlantic and with her mother.

Initially she sees nothing particular in the reflection of the water. Farren only notices her pale face starring back, looking -- as always -- slightly shocked and very child-like. But then there is suddenly a flash and words appear as pure light grazing the water's surface.

Leaning in more closely, she reads:

Farren Graham, you are an elixir. May I forever be thy drinker.

A small smile fights to take her lips.

"So dramatic," she mutters. But in that moment his theatrics-- his total insistence on unsubtly is quite endearing.

"Yes it is a bit dramatic, isn't it?" says Sirius, emerging and obviously pleased with himself.

"May I forever be thy drinker? No, Shakespeare would be proud," Farren teases.

He shrugs. "I couldn't help myself."

Sirius peers down at her, appearing more genuine than she could ever remember. He looks slightly captivated by whatever he sees there in her face.

"Be with me," he says, not really making it a question.

The night is very quiet. Farren had started this thing with Sirius not expecting quietness at all.

She isn't entirely sure she wants it.

Farren is well aware that, if she consented, this would be the first time Sirius Black had ever been tamed into seeing one girl exclusively. She is aware that by agreeing she would probably be thoroughly disliked by many girls that counted themselves her friends.

With that thought Farren tries to contain a smirk as she says, "That depends."

"On what?"

"You'll have to let me in on more of your secrets. I do not enjoy being uninformed."

Sirius considers this. "I can't tell you everything, Ren. Some of it's not my secret to tell... But I'll try my best."

Farren tries to pull away, but his hold remains firm. "And what is your best?"

"If you promise to be patient, nearly everything."

Sirius's eyes are intent. Not demanding, but expectant. For the first time she notices an odd harshness to his features. Perhaps it is the shadows cast from the moonlight, but Farren doubts it.

She recognizes the look. It's the expression her father would inhabit every time he looked at Farren, after Anamarrie -- her mother's -- death. It's the look of some suppressed darkness.

"Yes," she answers finally.