Longing for Lethe

Longing for Lethe

By: pandorabox82

AKA: Steph

Disclaimer: This story is based on characters and situations created and owned by JK Rowling, various publishers including but not limited to Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Books and Raincoast Books, and Warner Bros., Inc. No money is being made and no copyright or trademark infringement is intended. I am not anywhere near JKR’s writing style because I am not her. I just happen to be borrowing her characters for a little bit so I can get this story out of me. Don’t sue, because I am a typical college student, and have nothing.

Author's Note: Here, as I promised, is chapter two of "Longing for Lethe". This chapter is the awakening chapter for Hermione. Some loose ends are left, but they will be resolved in the end. I hope you enjoy chapter two!

When Hermione failed to show up for breakfast the morning following her attack, Ron and Harry figured she was studying in the library. Though the N.E.W.T.'s were ages away, they knew that she wanted to be prepared for anything the teachers threw at her. When she failed to show up for class, they began to worry. At lunch, they cornered Dumbledore, fully intent on finding out where their friend was. Dumbledore, however was prepared for them.

"Ah, Harry and Ron, just the young men I wanted to see. I'll be taking over Potions classes for a few days, while Professor Snape takes care of a personal problem. As for Miss Granger, she'll be indisposed for a few days. She had a little accident last night in the Astronomy Tower. I ask that you not go and visit her right now, she's still in a coma. Madam Pomfrey does not want her disturbed, at least not until she wakes up."

"But, Professor Dumbledore, what happened to her? It must have been serious if she's in a coma!" exclaimed Ron.

"We will know more when she awakens. Rest assured, she's in good hands, hands I would trust for the most delicate of potions-brewing. Now, boys, I believe you need to eat before our first lesson together begins." With those words, he took his seat at the High Table, and began to eat his lunch. Sensing they would get no further with him, Harry and Ron went to their table, and tried to eat something. However, their brains were mulling over Dumbledore's words.

'I wonder what he meant by stressing the hands he trusted with potions-brewing. He couldn't have meant Snape, could he have?' Harry thought, before pushing that line of thinking from his mind. 'There's no way Snape would help Hermione - she's a Gryffindor, and a "mudblood" to boot.'

'I hope she's okay. What could have caused her coma, though? I'd better owl Mum and let her know. Maybe she can think of some way to help Hermione,' Ron mused as he munched on an apple.

The bell rang, bringing lunch to an end. As Harry and Ron walked to Potions, the foremost thing on their mind was Hermione. Sitting down at their usual worktable, they realised how empty everything sounded without Hermione's constant jabbering. Just then, Malfoy and company walked through the door.

"So, when's the funeral?" he sneered.

"Funeral? Who died?" Ron replied.

"Why that Mudblood's, of course," came the icy reply.

"So, you heard about her accident, did you? Well, she's not dead, Malfoy. She's in a coma. There's a big difference," Harry heatedly countered, noting with triumph the disgust on Malfoy's face. "Looks like you still have someone to rival you in Potions."

Malfoy whipped out his wand, and was preparing to speak when Dumbledore glided into the dungeon. "Good morning class. Professor Snape has some personal issues to deal with, and will be indisposed for the next few days. Mr Malfoy, please put your wand away, you shan't be needing it right now. Anyway, as such I will be taking over the class until he returns." Most students looked relieved at the thought of having a reprieve from Snape, even for a short while. The class ran smoothly, and everyone was surprised that, when the bell rang, Neville's potion was correct.

***

Up in the infirmary, a silent vigil was under way. That the man undertaking the vigil was so concerned would come as a shock to most people who knew him. Only Dumbledore really understood where the man was coming from. Madam Pomfrey ran a tight ship, and hated the thought of germs invading and upsetting the healing process. Hence, the man had had to end the spell keeping his hair perpetually greasy, returning it to a sleek, soft black. Cleaned up a little, he looked a sight different from his normal self.

On the fifth day, he took up talking to her, even though he had convinced himself that she couldn't hear him, and that she was unlikely to remember anything he said. "All my life, I've had an image to live up to, but I was never "good" enough to fill my father's shoes." As he went on to talk about his early home life, he felt an odd sense of relief. Here, in this young woman lying in a coma, was someone who couldn't judge him for any of his past actions.

"Ah, Severus! How is she doing? Any change today?"

"No, sir, there's no change in her condition today. It's been five days, sir, when will she awaken?"

"In good time, Severus, in good time. Please, let me know when she does wake up. Harry and Ron are quite anxious to see her."

"I will, Albus."

Dumbledore left Severus alone again, with his thoughts and Hermione. "When I came to Hogwarts, I felt I could begin to fit in, somewhere. But no one seemed willing to get to know a kid who knew more curses than was healthy.

"The first time I saw my angel was at the sorting ceremony. I knew I'd be in Slytherin, and when her name was called and I saw her, I wanted her anywhere but Gryffindor. It would have been alright for me to see a Ravenclaw or Hufflepuff, but no Slytherin in their right mind would get caught with a Gryffindor. When I heard the hat call out that hideous name, I knew my chances were not even measurable to be with her.

"I began to watch her, throughout the years we spent at school. Finally, in our fifth year, she approached me, and asked me out. Of course I said yes - I'd been in love with her since I heard her name. Yet love is fickle and cruel, and sometimes ends up to be just a sick joke. James was the star of his house - of that there was no question. I thought I was losing my love to him, turns out I never really had her at all. I didn't realise this until one morning, I went to breakfast early. There they were, snogging at the Gryffindor table. Sirius and Peter noticed me watching them in shock and began to laugh. Soon, all of Gryffindor was laughing at 'silly Snape' who thought that anyone, let alone a Gryffindor, could love him.

"Soon after that, the "Marauders", as they called themselves, pulled their little prank on me. Those two things were the catalyst for a boy on the fence, pushing me over to the waiting circle of Voldemort and his followers. Of course, one of my reasons for going over was power, but it was more than that, I wanted to prove myself worthy, and get revenge in the same hand. However, there was a surprising revelation, I was too weak to stomach what the Death Eaters were doing to Muggles, and the like. It wasn't me, and so, I turned spy for Dumbledore, who gave me sanctuary at Hogwarts. I was too late to save Lily from her fate. Her death might as well have been at my hands, for I could have prevented it. That's why, when I saw you falling, I knew I had to save you. I could not have any more innocent blood on my soul." A single tear, wrangled from deep in his soul, rolled down his cheek, and fell on their clasped hands.

"When I look at you, lying there so still, I'm reminded of an old story about the Princess who slept for a hundred years, waiting for love's first true kiss. Please, return to us, Hermione, and release me from my vigil. I cannot play the gallant prince who can awaken you with kiss. My touch would sully the perfectness that surrounds you. But, I swear this to you - I will stay by your side till you awaken. It is my fault I could not save you from your injury from the fall…" His voice trailed off into his tangled thoughts. 'I know she'll never believe I willing stayed by her side throughout this entire debacle. Dammit! I wish I could have let myself be somewhat nicer to her, to all Gryffindors! But, no, I had an image to live up to - the cruel Potions Master, always walling himself off from others, letting no one inside. Maybe that's why Dumbledore never questioned my vigil. I know it's time I made a change in my life - but I'm so used to being like this that I find it hard to believe I can change.'

A sudden stirring caught his attention, and he released her hand at once. "How long have I been here? Have I missed any important assignments?" she asked, sounding more than a little groggy.

"Of course, academics would be your first thought, Miss Granger. I'm surprised that you didn’t ask for your little compatriots." The sound of his voice, cold and cruel, shocked him. He knew she had just come out of a desperate situation, and so tried to temper his voice with his next words. "Hermione, how are you feeling? Shall I ring for Madam Pomfrey?"

She was staring at him, a look of shock written on her features. "Is there a problem, Miss Granger? Have I suddenly sprouted an extra head or something?" he asked, starting to feel slightly uncomfortable under her gaze.

"How long have I been here, and how long have you been by my side?" she questioned, making it sound as if the answers she sought were life and death matters - which in her mind, they were.

"If you insist on being so persistent, Miss Granger, you have been here for five days. As for me, I have been here the same amount of time, watching over you, to make sure that you awoke. And now that you have, I must go and inform Dumbledore of the news. He has a lot of questions for you." With those words, he stood from the chair that had been his abode for the last five days, and began to leave.

"Wait!" Hermione called out to him, trying to get out of bed to thank him. But, she found that she couldn't move or feel her legs. She started to cry, just as Professor Snape was turning to her. "What's wrong with my legs, Professor? Why can't I move them?" she questioned, her eyes revealing the fear she felt.

"Child, everything will be just fine. Madam Pomfrey said is would only be temporary," he reassured her, moving back to her side.

"What if it's not though? What if I can never walk again?" Her voice, tinged with sadness, tore at his soul. For a moment he saw her not as the insufferable Gryffindor know-it-all, but as a young woman who in her fear was willing to let him see her cry. He sat once more in the chair at her bedside, and was stunned when she pulled herself into his arms, burying her face into his chest. He rang the bell on the bedside table, hoping Poppy would hear it, before he closed his arms around the sobbing girl. Poppy walked in to see this touching scene, and couldn't believe her eyes. Here was Severus Snape being nice to a Gryffindor.

"I'll run and get Albus, then. Tell him the good news and all," she said, though it felt as if she were talking to herself. As she looked at them, she thought she saw a string of red on both of their wrists, binding them to each other, but when she blinked, the string had disappeared.

"Alright, Poppy," Severus murmured to her, before she hurried from the room. 'It's so strange, but this slip of a girl seems to have made herself at home in my arms. This will most likely be my only time as a knight in shining armour, so I better make good of it,' he thought.

'It feels so right, to be in his arms like this. Is this Lethe's power, making me feel this way? I feel as if I've found my safe harbour, a shelter in the midst of this storm raging around me, a place where nothing and no one can ever harm me again.' However, that thought triggered Hermione's memories of that horrid night and she began to weep in earnest, her tears dampening Severus' robes.

Dumbledore chose that moment to walk in. Looking at the tableau they presented, he at once recognised the red string. He knew of its significance, and wondered how Fate could have chosen two less likely people to be soul mates. Chuckling to himself at the thought, he decided to interrupt this tender moment.

"Well, it seems as if the Sleeping Beauty has awoken at last. I am very glad you have decided to rejoin us in the world of the living," he told her, as she broke from Severus' arms. Hastily, she wiped at her eyes, drying the last vestiges of her tears. "Now, Hermione, I have a few questions to ask you about your accident. Would you rather Severus stay or leave?"

The words tumbled out of her mouth without her having to think of them. "I'd much prefer it if he stayed. He's been with me this entire time, why should he leave me now?" She looked steadily into Albus' eyes, saw the twinkle there, and knew he knew. Looking pointedly at her wrist, then back at Albus, she saw him give a small nod and felt a blush creep into her cheeks.

His voice, on the next words he spoke, was all business. "Hermione, we know that what happened that night was not an accident, nor was it an attempted suicide. What we do not know is what occurred before you fell, and who did this to you. Care to enlighten us?"

"Well, I had gone up into the Astronomy Tower to think - I like thinking there, my head is so much clearer, anyway, I climbed onto the windowsill to watch the moon when I slipped and fell. So, you see, it was an accident," she said, the words coming out much to fast for Dumbledore to believe.

"Hermione, who are you trying to protect? The consequences of this little stunt will cost that person dearly," Dumbledore smoothly replied.

'I can't tell Dumbledore that it was Draco, Draco would kill me, literally,' she thought, panic appearing in her eyes and face. "I'm telling you, it was an accident," she replied, desperation filling her voice.

"Headmaster, let me try," Severus' silky voice broke in, and Hermione gave him a look of great relief.

"Alright, Severus, try to get something out of her. I must talk with Poppy about the recuperation schedule," Albus replied as he left Hermione's bedside.

When they were alone, Severus looked at her. "Hermione, you can trust me. Tell me what really happened."

"It was like I said, at least a little. I did go up to the Astronomy Tower to think. I had done so for the past few weeks without realising that I had someone watching me. That night, he decided to act. He stunned me, kicked me, and was going to rape me, had not Filch come around. His friend called up the stairs to tell him this, and seeing the window, he lifted me onto the sill, ended the stunning spell, and pushed me out. After that I don't remember much, except for a strange, yet comforting dream I had while I was asleep. I also seem to recall someone trying to stop me from falling."

"But who attacked you? Hermione, we really must know so he can be punished, preferably quite severely," he replied after listening to her words. He was filled with anger over the thought of someone hurting his Miss Granger. 'Now where in bloody Hades did that thought come from?'

Her words interrupted his musings. "I-I can't remember who attacked me, sir. It all happened so fast!" she cried before burying her face back into his robes, tears flowing freely once more.

Somewhat awkwardly, he wrapped his arms around her slight frame. 'How odd, she seems to trust me implicitly. Gone is the latent abhorrence of my presence, replaced with some deeper, kinder emotion. The more I think about her situation, the more I crave to be her knight - but what good is a knight who wears black?' He looked down at this girl who'd so invaded his senses, and saw that she'd cried herself to sleep. Easing her body into a prone position, he pulled the blankets up around her, took her hand, and once more took up his vigil.