Mind Slavery

CHAPTER 7

She was true to her word about my admitting "truths."

"Say it, Ginny," she commanded again.

I was on my knees again, gasping for breath. I didn't want to say it. I didn't want to admit that it was true.

"You do know that the longer you try to resist, the longer I'm going to keep you down there, not to mention I'm going to make you say it much more often."

I don't want to say it.

"I'm very unconcerned with that, you're saying it anyway," she said breezily. "Why do you insist on fighting the truth? This battle is hopeless. You know I'll make you say it eventually."

I did know. And I was tired. "I belong to you," I whispered.

"Very nice, now say you serve me."

I hesitated, then said, "I serve you."

"Good, now say that I'm your master and you're my slave."

I'd had to say that before. I hated it more than anything else she made me say. I still stumbled over the words, which caused me to have to say them much more often then the others.

"You are my master, and I'm you-" my voice broke off a moment, "You're slave.

"Again."

"You are my master and I'm your slave," I said hurrying, before I could think about it to much.

She sighed loudly. "All right, get up and stand still. And get up slowly this time. Last time you got a littler closer to passing out than I like."

That night when the pain and dizziness was gone, I wondered if she would make me get on my knees again tomorrow.

"That really depends on you," she said. "At this moment, I think I've made my point about you rebelling. I doubt you'll need any reminders about that." She waited for my reaction, then said softly, "Pain passes. Memory lingers."

After saying that, she fell silent, and I fell asleep dwelling on it. Once again dreams haunted me.

"No No No!" I moaned, "It can't be, it can't be!" I was all alone in a concrete room strapped to the bed I was in. There they were! Thousands of them! Demons! I could feel them all around me, toying with me, taking turns jumping in and out of me. "HELP!" I screamed desperately to the people walking by the room. "Someone please, please, help me! They're after me!"

"Help, help, help!" I kept screaming.

"Ginny! Ginny! It's me, Hermione, wake up! You're having a bad dream!"

I sat straight up in bed and looked around wildly, for any sign of approaching demons. "They're after me," I moaned insensibly.

"No one is after you, Ginny. Come on, we're going to see Madam Pomfrey."

She convinced me to get out of bed, put a robe on and walk down to the hospital wing. Madam Pomfrey was still awake for some reason. "Madam Pomfrey?" Hermione said, "Ginny's had another nightmare."

"Oh, the poor dear," she said, walking over to me. "Ginny?" she asked, looking intently at me. "What was the dream about?"

I said nothing, just shuttered, remembering.

"She was screaming, 'They're after me!' over and over," Hermione said, worriedly.

Madam Pomfrey sighed and gave me another dreamless sleep potion. I fell asleep again, and this time dreamed nothing.

CHAPTER 8

When I awoke the next morning, I heard Professor McGonagall and Madam Pomfrey talking.

"I've tried to tell her parents before that she was having problems, but they seem to refuse to believe it," Professor McGonagall said angrily.

"Well they will have to listen this time! She's been found screaming in her bed with nightmares, countless times this year! She's having nightmares, she's possibly hallucinating again, and she's obviously very, very, depressed," Madam Pomfrey said worriedly.

"I'm not hallucinating," I whimpered aloud.

"Shhh, honey. I know," Jahorina said gently.

"Everyone always thinks I am." Jahorina was quiet. "Except you," I realized. "I'm not hallucinating!"

"Unfortunately, Ginny," she said softly, "Chances are I'm going to be the only one you ever meet who will realize that."

I started to cry softly. "Ginny, look at it this way. At least it's somebody."

"But you..." I started to say angrily, then caught myself and started crying again.

Jahorina sighed. "You want to speak freely?"

"What?" I blubbered.

"Stop trying to control your thoughts, tell me what you're thinking." She paused. "And I promise I won't get mad."

"Why?"

"Well, I think it could help you to get these things out. Then we can discuss them, and maybe you will feel better," she said calmly and waited. "I'm serious, tell me what you think."

"I think..." I began and stopped.

"Yes?" she asked in a sing-song voice.

Something seemed to explode in me. "It's not fair! Why should I have to serve you? What did I do that was so horrible, that I wasn't allowed to be free anymore?"

"So you feel I'm a punishment."

"Aren't you? You're absolutely insane! You get some kind of sick, evil, twisted pleasure out of torturing me, and making up crazy commands that I have to follow! And It's NOT FAIR!!!" Exhausted, I stopped talking.

She waited. "Is that it?" she asked calmly.

If she was real, she shouldn't be.

"Oh, baby," she said with a sigh "I thought you'd gotten past that. Yes, I'm real. This isn't a nightmare! It won't always seem like one, either."

"I find that very hard to believe," I said, bitterly.

"I said you could speak freely then, that doesn't mean now," she said with just a bit of warning in her voice. "Things will get better between us, Ginny. Trust me on that."

"How will they get better?" I asked despondently.

"You'll learn to do as I say. You'll learn to trust me. You'll surrender to me enough, that I can help you."

"Help me with what?" I asked, without thinking.

I felt her smiling. "The demons, of course."

A bubble of hope grew inside me. Was it possible? Could she keep them away? And would she? And if she would, why? And at what cost?

"Nothing you wouldn't already be paying to me," she said dismissively. "Freedom, pride... things of the like," she said her voice trailing off, waiting to see my reaction. "Anyway, you need to quit focusing on the negative. I've already been protecting you from those other voices."

With a start, I realized she was right. I hadn't felt any of them since she had started talking to me. "And the demons?" I asked, trying not to sound to eager.

"It will be a little more difficult, but rest assured, I'll take care of you." She paused. "And if you don't want to be tortured by me, just do as I say."

Before I could say anything to that, Madam Pomfrey rushed into the room. "Ginny! You're awake! Good. How are you feeling?"

"I feel a lot better," I said, pasting on a smile.

"Good, I'm so glad. You can go off to class now if you want. If you get scared or nervous just come right on back here." She gave me a big hug, like we were best friends or something, and I walked out.

I went to all my classes, feeling confused, but better then I had last night. As I was walking back from dinner, I ran into Luna.

"Hullo Ginny," she said. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm feeling fine," I said.

"Good. I get nightmares too sometimes," she said, then was distracted by something over my shoulder. "I'll see you around."

"Luna Lovegood," Jahorina mused.

"What about her?" I asked.

"Your friend there is about to get a mind goddess too."

It took me a moment to process this. "What?" I asked, sure I had misunderstood.

"Uh huh. That's what I said. She's been watched for a while. Ever since her mother died."

"But why . . . "

"Mind goddesses need a mind that's been partially broken before, but healed itself. That's what has happened to her."

"How was I broken?"

"Partially broken, not completely broken. I'm talking about Tom Riddle. He didn't break you completely. He tried, but didn't succeed. I will though."

I tried to mutter out some sarcastic remark, but couldn't stop a wave of fear going up my spine. I thought, If anyone can break me, it's her.

"Oh, I can and I will," she said and I could feel the power that seemed to radiate from her as it swept around me and smothered me. She laughed softly. "Feel that?" she asked dreamily.

I did.