The Only Protectus

'Things are going to be different from now on.'

'What? Nathan?'

The very same curly black hair, the violet eyes, darker and richer than hers, constantly watering. The hooded brow, the intensely serious face. Around him a strange mist swirled, and Mercury was sitting, patiently, patched black looking adoringly at his owner. Nathan himself was dressed in a black robe, black cloak in purple trimming. He looked formal, the way he always did when he was about to go out. Siana watched him closely, felt something strange.

'I said things are going to be different. They are going to change.'

'You're dead.'

He rolled his eyes, folded his arms. Slender fingers picked at absent threads and he looked around at the mist all around him.

'This is an odd place, I don't quite like it. Don't tell me I'm dead, you think I don't know that? Maybe all that time you spent with Dad and Freddie really did addle your brains. Then again, I'm not surprised.'

'Nathan why are you here? And...'

'Don't even ask me where we are. I have no idea. I'm just here. And I have things to tell you. The first is, do not lend your trust lightly, you never used to, but it is particularly important now. The second is, you truly know who your enemies are. You have Death Magic inside you, you cannot help but know.'

'I have what inside me?'

'Death Magic.'

'That sounds promising. Why don't I know about this? And I don't have it, because I can't have it.'

Nathan chuckled, it was a sound that made Siana's gut clench, she doubled over in sudden pain, the heartbreak of it all. Seeing him again, even though she never used to have all that much to do with him in the first place. Her gasp was hoarse and dispelled some of the mist. When she squeezed her eyes open she saw dark shapes encroaching on their little pale space. Mercury was wagging his tail now, looking at Nathan, loving him. Siana knew the feeling.

'Just because you have it, doesn't mean you're good at it. We didn't even know, until now. Really. But you have it, and this is important. You need to find out all you can about it Siana. And fast. Because they know you have it. Because there are things happening, that are planned. You cannot possibly know what is coming.'

'Uh...'

'Things are going to be different from now on. Things are going to change. I rather expect soon. In fact. They're going to change NOW.'

***

'Why. Why.' He was whispering as she drifted out of what felt like the most wrenching coma ever. She stretched and whimpered against the pain, flexing her fingers. 'Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't anyone tell me? How long have you been putting yourself through this?'

Siana's eyes flashed open.

Oh fuck.

I'm a HUMAN?! Oh god. Oh by Artemis of course. I was craving to turn human and I...oh god. I must have lost the form! Siana quickly searched for an answer over the buzzing of the pain which, as long as she lay still, did not threaten to destroy half of her head. Her head felt like fluff, fuzzy and thick. The one answer she came upon was pure honesty, she had no time to manufacture lies, nor the presence of mind to.

'We couldn't tell you. It was safer you not knowing.'

Her voice rattled and broke, did not really sound human at all.

'You nearly died tonight! Do you realise how bad your injuries are? You might very well still die.'

'Don't be ridiculous. I'm coherent. I'm conscious. I'm talking.' Siana said, aware that her voice was very hoarse from the pressure she had placed on her trachea whilst trying to scream. Her spine hummed, vibrated, her tail bone felt fractured which she imagined it probably had been. The break in her tail as a cat probably now translated as trauma to the base of her spine. She moaned softly and then opened her mouth to say something else when Severus cut in.

'Coherent, conscious people have died from sheer blood loss before. Any more trauma tonight and your heart will stop beating.'

'Oh boo fucking hoo. Like you care!' Siana snapped suddenly and then coughed, wincing from the pain the sharp movements caused. 'I would have thought you'd like to see that happen.'

'Not without some answers first about what you were trying to do.'

'Thanks Severus, it's really nice to know someone fucking cares now and then.' Siana burnt in her rage, burnt in the pain. Fear licked at her sides, all confusing, it seemed everything that she could do to hold onto her anger, to stop the fear from coming in. Knives and blood and light and spells and a voice so clear, so calm, so dangerous. Little pale hands pulling at her, tugging at her, digging into the wounds. Severus must have seen the look that crossed her face because his expression changed, became unfathomable. Siana's own expression became stony through the cuts and bruises.

'So I fell unconscious. So what? It's not like it's never happened before.'

'YOU didn't fall unconscious, that was utter physical collapse. You're lucky I didn't kill you. I had half a mind to put you out of your misery.'

'Good for you.' Siana said and swallowed, coppery flavours ran down her mouth, her tongue was still bleeding from the amount of times she had bitten it before. Anxiety tasted her now, tried to chew on her fingertips. Her hands and toes clenched under the covers. She vaguely realised that she was in his private rooms, in his bed, propped up on his pillows, the smell of Sandalwood all around her. 'God, this hur-'

She stopped herself from admitting to the pain, there was no way she was going to give him the satisfaction.

'And you reeked of stale abattwa bile and thyme.' He added now. 'I was assuming it was some sort of potion that he administered. What potion did he give you?'

'Look, Severus, I'm fine to just go back to my rooms and sleep the worst of this off. I'll like, call you in the morning or something.' Siana snickered to herself, then thought that she might be a little delirious.

'What potion did he give you?!' Siana looked at Severus for the first time. Really looked. Unkempt, ruffled, worried, stricken. She blinked, surely she was still in a coma?

'It was a healing potion...he wanted me better so he could...so he could.' Keep on torturing me.

'Dear Lord.' Severus whispered to himself, passing a shaking hand over his eyes. 'Your reaction to potions, I well remember...' he trailed off, and Siana well remembered too for a moment. Back before Sibilant Stow, the first time he'd really shown that he'd given a damn was when she had swallowed that stupid potion and felt as though the entire contents were scouring out her lungs. Severus seemed to mentally shake himself and then his expression turned grave. 'You nearly died Siana, the blood loss alone...you're going to have scars for...'

'I've already got enough too.' Siana murmured to herself and tried to roll over. To face away from him. Her whole nervous system shrieked and she screamed. Only, it didn't come out as a scream, instead it was a broken gasp. As Severus moved jerkily to her side Siana wheezed, glared at him angrily. 'Why do you care?'

'You reminded me of...' he trailed off, his expression shuttered closed and he waved what appeared to be a careless hand towards her. 'I'm no healer. Not for this. I have to take you to Madam Pomfrey.'

Siana twisted back to her previous position, flat on her back and couldn't stop the whimper of pain that etched its way out of her throat. She continued to inhale heavily for breath, feeling as though she could not take enough air into her lungs. Against her skin the material of the blankets suddenly felt too abrasive, the bandages felt like fingers holding her down and she twitched uncertainly, did she still have enough strength to run away? Her left foot spasmed outwards, trying to jerk the bandages off her legs and she suddenly realised that Severus would have touched her, would have checked the extent of her injuries. As she rolled her hip out her pelvis and spine gushed razors of hurt outwards.

'I don't want to move.' Siana dry sobbed. Severus winced and looked away. When he turned back Siana was staring at him, eyes impossibly wide and sheened over with tears. Awkwardly he moved to her side and knelt down. He was well aware that comfort was something he didn't often provide, but he was also aware that without it she might very well die from trauma alone. Though she seemed to be handling her near death experience remarkably well he hated the idea of her dying, not necessarily because he wanted her to live, but because he couldn't imagine explaining the whole situation to Dumbledore.

Svelte had been locked in the potions room, she had kept trying to lick Siana's little finger.

'You can't stay here.' He said, taking one of her blood encrusted hands in his own.

'I can't move!' She half choked and Severus blinked. That much was true. What was he going to do? Apparate her? It was too dangerous. Any form of magic was too dangerous right now.

'Why? I just don't understand why you would. Why at all?' He whispered again. 'How many times has Draco...'

'A couple. Okay? Just a couple.'

'Just a couple is enough. You...aside from the curses which were, colourful enough. What did he do to you?'

'I don't remember a lot of it. I passed out a few times. The pain was, the pain...not as bad as when...but still very, um. God. I have to go back there too. I have to face him again. To be more regular. And I.'

'You can't.'

'You don't understand.' Siana murmured desperately and Severus' expression did not alter from grim severity.

'It's not a matter of what I do and do not understand. You can't go back there, because your injuries are too extensive. You will...and I can assure you this, you will die if you over extend yourself right now. I cannot give you anymore healing potions for at least another hour, because Draco fed you a toxic amount of what I'm assuming is the Quickfix potion which is highly dangerous at any rate, and it's going to take hours to leech it out of your system. Secondly, once Dumbledore is made aware of this altercation in plans he will certainly not let you return...'

'Then don't tell him.'

'Oh you come up with such smart and beguiling answers.' Severus said angrily. 'How silly of me not to think of that. You fool! Albus knows much more than he lets on, and...' Severus suddenly paused. 'And he let you. What was it? A chance to redeem yourself? A chance to prove that you can be anything but a Basilica?' Severus snapped angrily, at the look on her face he stood, backed away from her. 'You're foolish child, that's exactly what you are. You can't escape your heritage, I can't escape mine. He should have known that you were on a path to getting yourself slaughtered.'

He opened his mouth to say something else and then he paused, adopted an expression of deep thought.

'You were there, in the last meeting.'

Ah. Siana sniffed.

'You held onto your form.' His tone was surprised. His brow furrowed. 'Frederick tested you, and you held onto your form.'

'It was why the plan works so well...no one so far, not even Dumbledore, has been able to break me out of a Transfiguration barring myself. I don't know what happened tonight, usually I keep the form even when I pass out. I must have been, well. Not very well.'

'You can manage three Animagi? Or are you no longer able to change into the fruitbat?'

'No I can do all three.' Siana said and then shuddered as a frission ran up her spine. Her mouth twisted and her eyes searched out one of the very dim torches, needing something to focus on. The whole room was very dim, Severus seemed to enjoy the shadows and it felt a lot less exposing for Siana. With an effort she slowed her breathing down. She started when Severus sat alongside her, on the bed, looking down at her curiously. She refused to meet his gaze.

'You seem in a remarkably good mood.' She added. Severus ignored her, and Siana felt that any moment he was going to turn horrible, or perhaps more horrible than usual. This was all going to fly back in her face. Or he was going to kill her. Or something...

'You helped Lucius put that girl through her paces. During the meeting. I recall you were struggling before hand. It's not a very good disguise if you try to escape what you are called onto do.'

'And isn't that what you did when you put the girl out of her misery?' Siana whispered and Severus blinked.

'I still might enjoy it.' Severus said darkly and Siana turned her head to look at him, her headache was so intense the colours around her were changing, bleeding into one another.

'I don't believe you. I couldn't er, now, I'm going to tell you something which I'll no doubt take back once I'm not half as vulnerable and near death as I am right now. I couldn't hate you after that. I just couldn't. Something clicked in me and I haven't been able to hate you since. Don't get me wrong, I don't like you and I think you're rude and horrible. I just don't hate you.'

There was silence then. A long gap of nothing, Severus remained frozen in place on his bed, this time looking at a guttering torch. Siana stared at the hem of his robe, too worried about her admittance to do anything else. Blood trickled down her throat, out of her wounds. Everything seemed to bleed.

There was a scratching sound at one of the doors, and then a whimper. Severus licked his lips and walked over to the door, as he opened it Svelte bounded in and then with a single, graceful leap jumped onto the bed. She pattered up to Siana's neck, sniffed a little and then plonked down.

'Everyone's favourite fox.' Siana murmured and Severus frowned.

'I'd like to say that I don't hate you, but it's usually inevitable. I don't currently hate you. I doubt that's any consolation. How is the pain?'

'Oh it sucks. I'm never going to sleep again. I'm well and truly all kinds of fucked right now.' Siana said, trying to summon a smile and failing miserably.

'Frederick seemed remarkably confident when he cast on that girl. Entirely too confident. He's done this before.'

Siana froze. Severus looked at her thoughtfully, before continuing.

'He objectifies the victim, to distance himself from the personality of her. He talked about extensive testing. I recall you telling me that he pioneered that potion on you.'

'So?' Siana felt unaccountably defensive. Severus pressed on.

'I'm going to make a couple of inferences, about a topic upon which I have been thinking while you've been lying here half dead. You may correct me if I'm incorrect, though I very rarely am. Frederick has absolutely no problems torturing his victims. None. In fact I think he'd be quite happy to torture someone to death if he could get away with it more often. Secondly, you already have great fear of him. As much as I would like to assume that you are working together, I find that this might be unlikely. He used to torture you, in the same manner, didn't he?'

Siana swallowed, felt a pressure on her chest. Severus continued slowly.

'With illegal curses, I imagine.'

Siana closed her eyes, tried to focus on the pain in her tailbone instead. Anything to distract her from something that she never wanted anyone to be aware of. Ever.

'When you found out you were to be channelling the Cruciatus curse onto the girl you started struggling. Very much so. And yet why would you struggle if Frederick was correct and the girl actually felt nothing at all? Because it wouldn't matter if you cast Cruciatus on someone who wouldn't feel it. Ineffective. It's a lie isn't it? The victim isn't immune to the effects of the curse under the Insidious. So here's my second conclusion. Not only did he used to torture you whilst you were under the influence of the Insidious potion, you were unable to break yourself out of the potion's grasp. You were trapped. Effectively. All those curses, you felt everything.'

Siana finally managed to summon her smile. Broken, battered and cynical.

'Still think I wanted to kill your fucking sister for Frederick?' She paused. 'I don't remember it, because thankfully too much of the Insidious makes you start to forget things after a while. It's one of the side effects of having the Insidious now, flashbacks. Oh and they're fun. All kinds of fun.'

Severus blinked.

'And yet you're still willing to get it out of your system? You practically begged me.'

'And I still would. I'm desperate.'

Another silence, and then a very heavy sigh from Severus.

'So effectively what you went through tonight, in the hands of Draco...'

'Well. I mean I thought I was going to die, at least with Frederick he never wanted to kill me because he was too busy worried about testing his beloved potion. The pain factor? Like now? It hurts, and I'm a coward, I'll probably whinge and whinge or at the very least change into a Protectus, but I'm kind of used to it.'

'I can't...' his sentence drifted off into the air, unfinished, half whispered.

'What?'

'I can't hate you either. So help me...I want to.'

'Ha. I wonder how long this will last.' Siana said to herself and then chuckled. Then cried out. 'By Artemis give me a potion please. I'd rather have the side effects or pass out than this. Please. Severus. Please?' Siana begged and Severus shook his head slowly. Siana glared at him for a second and then turned her head to the side. 'I'd change into another animal, but I think that's dangerous right now and besides, my tail is broken. Ugh. Stupid tail.'

'When did you start calling me Severus again?'

'When I knew you wouldn't kill me for it.' Siana said softly and Severus shook his head slowly.

'I suppose you will have to stay here until you are well enough to be moved to your own quarters. I'll go to Dumbledore and forward the situation, I will make a personal recommendation against you doing this sort of thing again.'

'You do it. It's dangerous for you too. I know it is.' Siana said softly.

'I am much better equipped to look after myself if something goes horribly wrong than you are. That's another thing, you went without your wand. I suppose there's not even much of a point in reminding you of your innate stupidity, because it doesn't seem to be something you can do without.'

He moved away, walking to some cabinet and Siana closed her eyes.

Had a strange dream. Death Magic. Nathan. Oh God. By Artemis was that real? Or a delusion?

Siana stiffened, felt very cold, and was aware of more warmth filtering in around her. Possibly a spell on the blankets, so she wouldn't go into shock so easily. When she heard movement around her she started violently trembling, Severus moved into her line of view and sat beside her once more. He placed a hand underneath her neck, it was clinical. His expression uninterested. In his other hand he held a finely wrought crystal glass filled with a clear fluid.

'Lift your head up. Slowly.'

'What...'

'It's just cool water and some lemon juice. Lemon is an astringent, which will stop you from retaining too much water, and hopefully take some of the swelling down in your organs. You're already bruised just about black nearly everywhere.'

'I feel like killing myself.' Siana whispered and Severus pinned her with a black stare. The glass of water and lemon juice froze halfway up to her mouth, the supportive hand at the back of her neck stilled. Siana swallowed. 'I know it's not the right thing to say. I should be all brave, and self effacing, or some shit. I'm not a martyr...'

'I'm actually finding that very hard to believe right now. I'd like for you to swallow this now.' He said stiffly and Siana swallowed two sips and then closed her eyes.

'I don't want anymore.'

The glass was placed along the black bedside cabinet. Siana watched him stand up and then walk away, his arms folded, his hands splayed out against his black sleeves. She saw his wand tip in his pocket.

Her body felt wasted, weak. Every breath seemed to be a labour, just swallowing, drinking, even now her stomach felt unsettled.

'I don't have time for this.' He finally said under his breath, turning back to her. Siana blinked.

'And I do.'

'Do you have any idea how time consuming it is trying to teach these students anything? Teaching, as well as my extra curricular assignments, as well as brewing the Wolfsbane potion, as well as brewing your Insidious antidote is difficult enough. Meetings, Dumbledore, Voldemort, and now this.'

'I have a suggestion for you. How bout we switch? You be in the bed with the bandages and the pain, and I'll rant at you.' Siana's voice was getting increasingly hoarse the more she talked. 'Look, just move me from the bed with a spell or something and I'll figure this all out myself.'

'Do you have any concept, how suspect it would be if you died in my chambers? It's not like I haven't been asked to organise it. There's already a contract on your head.' His voice was a slow hiss, conspiratorial.

'But I-'

'I have things to do anyway. Potions to check.' Severus said abruptly and without another word he swept out of his own room. A few moments later Siana heard the sound of bubbling, the clattering of vials and potions equipment. She closed her eyes sleepily and felt paddling around her side. Svelte was back, having roused. The tiny fox, stunted in growth and needy when it came to attention, whimpered and moved up the bed until she was flush with Siana's neck and the quilt cover. Siana smiled softly.

'Hi there little lady.'

Svelte made a small chuffing noise in the back of her throat and proceeded to wriggle her way under the quilt covers.

'Ahhh...does that mean old potions Professor let you do this often?' She murmured as Svelte pushed her head underneath Siana's mangled hand and started licking her little finger. Siana wiggled it back, and soon found herself limply stroking the scrawny creature, feeling calmer, more tired.

Eventually she drifted off again.

***

'Siana! Siana! Oh for the...will you SHUT UP!'

The roar seemed to shake her and she woke with a shriek. Her spine was bending before she even knew what was happening as her reflex action to sit up took over. The sting of her wounds became a torture and her face twisted, her hands and feet spasmed as she helplessly collapsed back onto the bed, thumping back onto the stiff mattress. Siana opened her eyes but couldn't see out of fear and then realised that she was back, with Draco.

Hands, knives, rust, light. Siana felt her bones go cold, horribly cold, then she was shuddering violently, mumbling helplessly in the back of her throat. Denial coursed through her and when the hands touched her shoulders firmly she struck out wildly.

Sensation destroyed her consciousness and she fell.

***

'Siana...Siana...Siana...'

'Mmph.'

'Siana.'

'No.' She murmured and squeezed her eyes shut.

'I need to ask you some questions. Do you know who you are?'

'I'm...a...stu,' she paused, took a painful breath, 'stupid Basilica.'

'That will do. Well it's official, this has been the most eventful evening I've had all year. Your heart deigned to stop beating, and I proceeded to have an enthralling time pressing down on your already bruised sternum, to try and get you to breathe again, because a spell or potion would have finished you off. This was after you went into shock, and after you collapsed, and after your nightmare. But it was before your second nightmare...' Severus continued in an exasperated voice. 'I can see this is going to be an exciting and electrifying evening. I can't wait for you to put me through hell again.' He finished and Siana opened her eyes cautiously. Even the dimmed torches seemed overly bright.

'It hurts to breathe.'

'That would be your sternum, which would appropriately be quite sore right now.' Severus had pulled a stiff backed black and green chair to her bedside and was sitting, hunched forwards, his hands interlocked under his chin. His expression was both that of tiredness, irritation and something else Siana couldn't quite define.

'Why don't you get some sleep?' Siana whispered and Severus leaned back then, against the chair. His hands dropped into his lap.

'And miss you unconsciously trying to kill yourself? I realise that it would be very stirring for you to die here, which would lead to me quite probably losing my job, but I'd rather have you live so I can make your life hell later for doing this to me.'

'Oh.' Siana said and then for some reason felt amused. 'Of course.'

'Of course.' Severus echoed.

'How are your potions going?'

'As well as can be considering they aren't getting the exact amount of attention they need. Between my own attacks, and your heart just giving up...'

'What if you'd had an attack while my heart stopped?' Siana said suddenly and Severus chuckled then, a bitter sound.

'You would have died. Couldn't have that happening, not right now anyway.'

'So what you're trying to say is that you saved my life, to save your own ass. I suppose I really shouldn't be surprised. I mean, you killed a girl, to save your own ass.'

'Gratitude is obviously something alien to your nature.' Severus seemed to suddenly notice the bobbing lump in Siana's bed that was still licking her fingers. 'Svelte?'

'Uh huh.'

'I've been trying to train her out of...'

'Ah.' Siana said suddenly and screwed her face up.

'Pain?' Severus said softly and Siana nodded, her breathing suddenly hoarse. He shook his head slowly and leaned forward, examined her face which was pale and clammy, discoloured. 'You might experience twinges for a while. Your coccyx has been badly damaged and your spinal cord will react in strange ways to that. Especially considering the nature of your torture. Which...I still find hard to believe that you voluntarily put yourself in that position.'

'It was why I came back.' Siana said softly and Severus' eyes shot open. He leaned forward, looked at her closely.

'You came back for this? To help?'

'Yes. It's why I came back. I went to Australia, some sources were there...to see if I could rid myself of the effects of the Locarius spell, which I did. And the effects of the Insidious. Which I couldn't completely erase, the guy didn't have enough. You'd remember him actually.'

'I would.' Severus said doubtfully.

'I met Gus. Gus Whittle. Apparently you trained in potions together or something?'

Siana trailed off, an expression seemed to steal over Severus' face, one she had never seen before. It was a kind of affection, an open nostalgia. He shook his head slowly and his lips twitched.

'Gus is still manufacturing potions? I thought his select trade was selling wands now?'

'Oh it is. It is. I needed him to look at my wand too. You know, because it's spastic. He spoke very highly of you. He called you Sev.'

Severus choked slightly, Siana thought it was outrage and then saw his expression. Amused? Was that a chuckle? Was he just stopping himself from chuckling? That's it, this is a dream. I'm dead, Draco killed me, and I'm imagining this. All of it. Soon he'll start doing a polka, and...

'He said you were wasting your time teaching, and that he'd be as grumpy as you in a classroom. Said you were immensely smart.'

'I was the top of my class. No one has graduated from the European Potions Institute with a higher score than I have, in the history of its establishment. Who put you onto Gus? Ollivander I expect. So...then you figured out how to change into a third Animagus, came back with some harebrained scheme which Dumbledore no doubt agreed to.'

'Like you being a double agent. He agrees to a lot of harebrained schemes it seems.' Siana drawled and then stroked the roof of her mouth with her tongue. Blood. Again. She yawned, winced as it made her saw jaw and face move, and Severus sighed.

'I'm going to go and work on my potions, I need to check them fairly extensively, they haven't received half as much attention as they need.'

'Okay.'

'I'd like you to get some sleep. The more well rested you are, the healthier you are. The quicker I can get you out of here.'

'Mmph. Go away.' Siana muttered under her breath, half joking. Severus walked out, and once more she fell asleep to the sound of bubbling and clatters, strange acrid scents and often brilliant coloured fumes leaking in from under the closed door. Svelte was licking her finger again.

***

He worked intensely on his potions, all of them, the antidote was nearly done. The Insidious was coming along well, the Wolfsbane so far had not seemed to have suffered enough to be toxic. He was not done with testing it yet, and needed about another four hours.

Two hours into his testing he was annoyed, but not surprised by, a knock on his door. Sighing he spelled his cauldrons to bubbling less ferociously and wondered rather bleakly who it could be. He moved from his work room, through his bedroom, into his main area. He opened the door to a rather sedate looking Dumbledore and resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Of course you'd be dropping by. This is rather apt.

'Severus, may I speak with you? Sirius is becoming quite insistent about the Wolfsbane potion, he is very concerned for Remus.' Dumbledore said softly and then suddenly paused, froze. Severus felt the ball of dread start to unravel and paralyse his limbs. I dare you to assume that this whole shambles is my fault. I wasn't the one that insisted she go to the Manor in the first place. She did that. And I'm sure you'll be proud of yourself once you find out what's happened. Condoning the performance of such a serious undertaking in her case. Suicide. Dumbledore's nostrils flared very slightly and his face went very grave. Without another word he pushed past Severus and walked quickly towards Severus' bedroom.

Severus looked skyward, and then quickly followed.

Dumbledore was standing over the prone form of a sleeping Siana, running his wand over her body, lightly touching the blankets. Severus knew it was a body scan, he'd done one himself. It was one of the few spells he knew he could do better than Dumbledore, simply because he'd had to perform them on his sister so many times.

I never imagined that I would be using that spell on Siana.

When Dumbledore looked up his eyes were hooded, his mouth thinned.

'How long has she been like this?'

'I found her, still as a cat, she hadn't lost her form.' Severus said quickly, aware that if Siana had lost the form around the Death Eaters, there would have been huge problems. 'Outside the Malfoy Manor. She's woken up a few times, lucid, nothing wrong aside from shock and trauma. She's too physically frail to be taken to Pomfrey's right now.'

'I'm well aware of that.' Dumbledore said gravely, staring at Siana's face, which was discoloured and starting to swell.

'It was Draco Malfoy, Albus. I don't recommend she goes back there.'

Dumbledore sighed. Pocketed his wand and sat down in the chair that Severus had been seated in earlier. 'If I could expel him from this school, believe me, I would. It is only through him attending Hogwarts are we able to keep Lucius' interest in the school less destructive.' Dumbledore took a deep breath. 'Madam Pomfrey came to me earlier in the week, complaining of the advanced state of infection in Siana's thigh. She claimed that Lupin had said it had been caused whilst she, Sirius and Lupin had run around Hogsmeade...but she was doubtful. It takes time for advanced infection to settle in. I knew something had happened last time she went to visit Draco, but I didn't realise her injuries would be so violent.'

'Or so fatal. Albus, I dislike criticising your methods, yet I find that letting her go in the first place...'

'Severus. Letting you go in the first place is also incredibly irresponsible. I have entire confidence in your skills when it comes to looking after yourself, but those skills are considerably less important when placed amongst a group of Death Eaters who are still reluctant to trust you.'

'Lucius wants me back in the loop. I'm going to be returning some time in the next few nights. I've gone soft.' Severus' lip curled and Dumbledore shook his head.

'I'd rather that you had gone soft, than you still being a part of them as you were before. You did a remarkable thing, returning Siana back to Hogwarts.'

'I didn't even know it was her, which leads me to another point, I appreciate being kept in the dark.' His tone was lightly sarcastic and Dumbledore sighed.

'You know what I believe, that which you do not know, cannot be tortured or deceived out of you.'

'That which I did not know, very nearly had me putting a black cat out of it's misery.' Severus glared at the form of Siana. 'Now she's here, in my bed, and I suppose I'll have to stay by her side tonight to make sure she doesn't perish in my chambers, in my bed. When she's well enough she'll be moved. Make no mistake about that. I don't have time for this.'

'I know.' Dumbledore said softly. 'I'm well aware of the difficulties this adds to our already large list of things to do. On the lighter side, you'll get to be better acquainted with young Miss Basilica.'

'Which is something I always wanted. What is this, an early Christmas present? Albus, you shouldn't have.' His delivery was entirely deadpan and dry. Dumbledore sighed.

'What happened during the meeting?'

Severus leaned back and recounted the events of the meeting, and Dumbledore listened in silence, his expression grave. Severus finished up sombrely.

'Lucius is working on the Hogwarts Ministers. You know he'll get them too. They have Heath Ittorius working on Cornelius. Which to be honest with you, the Mayor is so senseless I'm surprised he hasn't already been poisoned to Hades and back again. Secondly, they are expecting results on my part in getting past your defences and placing the potion in you. I have very few choices left, and I can not play evasion forever. I have a few hazardous ideas, the one I want to choose least is bringing fresh meat into the mix, torture is not pleasing for me.' Anymore.

'What are your hazardous ideas?'

'Working on a testable vaccination is proceeding well. If Siana doesn't find herself perishing or if my attacks remain non-fatal it will be a short matter of days before I can test its use. If it does work, then we begin immediate vaccination. My hazardous idea involves presenting you, or someone else of importance who has been vaccinated to the point where they can act as though the Insidious is in their bloodstream, but cannot be affected by it if administered.'

'Hazardous indeed. You have others?'

'I still have no idea why the Basilica family was murdered. I know why they kept Frederick alive, he is obviously useful. Yet I cannot discover why Siana Basilica was kept alive. Most of the Death Eaters do not appear to know why. They are playing this close to the chest. I think they would rather have her than they would have you.'

'And Harry Potter?'

'I have been told almost nothing about Mr. Potter. I am not considered safe anymore to carry that kind of information. Voldemort seems to be working entirely with Pettigrew on that count.'

Somewhere something clanked, Filch was probably clearing out one of the many storerooms. In the other room, behind the closed door, the soft sound of vigorous bubbling made a background so firm that they couldn't hear Siana's breathing which was laboured, heavy and uneven.

'So you will keep her here until you can move her? Will you alert me when she is well enough for visitors?'

'If you are intending that visitor to be yourself, I'd recommend caution. She seems very sensitive at the idea of you knowing that she can't carry out her functions appropriately. I find this amusing, considering she can't ever carry them out in the first place.'

'Ah. Well I know now.' Dumbledore looked at her sadly, and a small smile crept upon his face, weary and short lasting. 'I suppose,' he said watching her face closely, 'I suppose when one has been expected to disappoint all their lives, one cannot help but expect they will disappoint. She cannot help her disposition, Severus, just as you cannot help yours and I cannot help mine. She might think it, and you might think it, but I am well assured that her position in life is not to disappoint.'

He stood. Severus found that he had nothing to say, phrases like 'she is a disappointment' and 'where will you send her now that she is useless?' kept coming to his mind. But these thoughts were not as vehement and wide ranging as they once were, and he avoided looking at her again as he showed Dumbledore out of his quarters. He disliked change. Change led to his sister being murdered, led to his being a Death Eater, and no longer being a Death Eater. It always bought with it pain, and no end of suffering.

'Tell Sirius and Remus that the Wolfsbane potion is just about ready. I should be able to deliver it before noon. That or tell Remus to get off his...well, tell him that he can come and fetch it himself. I have enough to do as it is.'

'Yes, and Severus? One of your hazardous ideas is growing rather like a vine in my head. I'd like for you, Siana's and your own health permitting, to come up to my office later this evening. I do believe I have a plan.'

'How auspicious.' Severus said dryly and some of the harsh glitter from his eyes faded. Dumbledore inclined his head politely and walked sedately away. Severus returned back to his chair by her bedside and watched her closely. To his surprise she stirred, a small noise issued from the back of her throat, and then her mouth opened.

'Mmph. I heard someone talking.'

'Yes. Dumbledore.'

Siana stilled, her eyes widened a little and she arched her head.

'And?'

'We will discuss a further course of action once you are well.'

'I'm so tired. Normally I'd be a bit more...stupid right now, but I can't think or...wait. Oh no...' she trailed off and Severus thought he knew what was coming. 'Ahh...fuck.' Her voice cracked and she squeezed her eyes shut. 'The light's too bright. It hurts.'

A frown. The quilt shifted as Svelte changed position. Siana's face twisted in a rictus. Disorientation and pain. It laced her up in knots. Without thinking his smooth hand strayed down across his stomach to his wand and he touched it. Lightly. Once.

'It's very dim.'

'No. No it's not. Oh Artemis it's not. God no. No no no no no no.'

He started to take his wand out of his pocket and froze when it was gripped in his hand, in front of him. What are you thinking? Think about when you last used this. On whom you last used this. Think who you're going to be using it on now. And yet it made him tense to see her like this, very tense.

'Ah fuck, ah gods.' She whimpered with her eyes closed, slipping out of consciousness.

But what choice do you have?

The wand pointed at her with certainty and he walked towards her, his face setting into a mask. His other hand moved to his shoulder and settled there, the correct position for what he was about to do. A part of him wondered if he still remembered all of it, the rest of him knew that this knowledge would never leave him. He would forget how to curse before he forgot how to do this.

'Corpus attrecto sano.'

The wand mobilised and suddenly glowed a dim red. The colour shifted slowly, from red to green, to white, and then finally to a transparency, a shimmering heat wave. He ran the tip of his wand half a metre above her body, checking where he should begin, where it was safe enough to begin. His own breathing steadied to a slow and stable cadence. It was one of the few spells that required a relaxed state, pure concentration, a channelling of energy and a lack of words.

He began at her feet. His arm stretched out, lowered slightly, and he sensed the pressure points that were toxified. Without touching her, without uttering a word, with only the smallest movement of his wand he manipulated the spot. Siana's eyes shot open, squeezed shut again at the light.

'What?'

'Shh...just shut up for once.' He said quietly.

And he moved then, slowly, starting at her feet, working methodically and patiently along the pressure points. There was no need to touch her, no need to speak, and he found that every pressure point he undid she seemed to tense and then relax a little. It would not relieve the pain from the source, but it would relieve the residual pain, the pain that travelled from all her cuts and bruises and lacerations and pulled together her muscles and nerves. He knew from experience, not everything had to hurt.

As he worked, he fell into a sort of trance, losing track of time. He began to forget where he was, and the world fell away from him, and his fingertips. The last time he had done this, Lydia had been arching off the bed in pain, she had been close to dying. It seemed that for as long as he had known her, she had always been close to dying. A kind of muscular dystrophy, inherited and genetic. His parents always said it had been sheer luck that he hadn't picked it up, sheer bad luck that Lydia always had. He had always thought it had been a cruel kind of fate, he had lost all faith in the world, in synchronicity, in anything that might have decided why she should be the one to suffer so often and so completely, why he should be the smart one.

It seemed sometimes he was only born to serve her. To learn potions that could heal alongside potions that could destroy, to learn the wand massage, the body scans...to hide his knowledge from his parents who would have objected. To share his knowledge with Lydia, who used to look at him with dark bright eyes, eager and keen.

'I want to know how it's done. Teach me.'

'I don't need to teach you, it takes up too much of your brain knowing this sort of stuff, better to save your brain for other things.'

'Most of my brain is saved for out there.' And then she had pointed out the window, at the heath, and the swimming fields of tall grass purpling in the sunset. 'All the creatures and plants and trees that I know are out there. That's where I belong.' She'd walk and walk, until her muscles protested and he'd find her, panicked and sweating, collapsed out in the heather with a bunch of flowers gripped convulsively in her hand. He'd have to move her back to the house, and sometimes he'd have to help her right there and then. She'd wrap her arms around his neck and whisper things about birds singing. And in those moments when she wasn't dead, he loved nature too. Somehow it infected him.

And then she was gone. Just like that. And hatred, it carved out his insides and reformed his heart, his organs, his mind. He hated nature and animals and trees and plants. Anything she had found beautiful. He'd hated.

He still did.

For a while, for a long while he'd pulled nests out of trees and felt a smug sort of satisfaction when he knew the eggs would stop creating, chilled to death by the cold winds. Knowing that any fledglings would die from starvation. He'd stopper up rabbit warrens, strip trees of their leaves and leave the branches and foliage scattered around. Everywhere. His parents had started to worry, because it wasn't an outward rage, but a cold burning thing which was methodical and calculated and cruel.

And then he had found the Death Eaters. And he had never looked back.

Closer now, to her head, and Siana was in a daze of her own. The look he directed at her was blank, unforgiving and yet disturbed. He didn't understand any of it. Why he was here, now, attempting to ease the pain of the one person who deserved all of his pain.

He was so confused that he did not hear the thudding of footsteps.

The door slammed open and he jerked out of his trance. He whirled to the door, still keeping his wand pointed at Siana, not wanting to break the connection. Siana's eyes shot open and did not squeeze shut at the light. It was Sirius, out of breath, obviously intending to give Severus a piece of his mind. He took in the scene before him, Siana horrifically injured, Severus pointing a wand at her, looking blank and dark...

'You. How could...Snape you son of a bitch! What in hell's name did you do to her?' His wand was out, pointed at the man's heart and Severus, in automatic reflex raised his wand and pointed it at Sirius. 'You bastard. You utter bastard! I don't think I'm going to wait for Dumbledore to relieve you of your duties. I'm going to do it myself.'