Simon says...

Looking back with damp eyes,
My lips are trembling, overwhelmed.
Too many words are streaming through the opening,
Nothing can leave it; I have to remain silent.

(Lacrimosa)

"Into the Shack!" Harry ran towards it and yelled 'Alohomora' while still several steps away. But nothing happened. The door stayed shut. Shocked, he turned around. The Dementors were still approaching them. He saw Simon struggling with Justin's body in the mud. He rushed to help and dragged them towards the hut. Simon levelled his wand at the doorknob and used a strange incantation to force it open. They stumbled inside and hunched under a table. Simon used a second charm to seal all windows and doors.

"Now we can only pray for a miracle," he exhaled the words.

"We're out of our minds," Neville voiced his fears. "We're fleeing from one bad thing to another. Now, we're stuck in a haunted house. No matter what, we're done for."

"It was never haunted in here," Harry said. "That was just a cover story." Since Simon had sealed the room, he had become a lot calmer. "Let's go."

"Where?" Luna asked, her hands rose in despair. "We can't get out of here!"

"There's a secret passage, leading from here to Hogwarts," Harry explained. The others looked at him, first unbelieving and then their eyes filled with hope.

Neville helped to carry Justin on their way to the Shack's basement, while Luna supported Simon. The skinny student was clearly shaken and exhausted. They walked through the narrow passage that seemed to go on and on, but the further away they got from the Dementors, the better they felt. At some point, they switched positions and Simon and Luna took over the burden of carrying Justin. He let himself be handed around like an empty container. Harry wondered what it would be like, not being able to feel, to only breath and just be, with no hope of recovery. What would Dumbledore do once they arrived at Hogwarts?

The ground level started to rise and he knew they were about to reach the Whomping Willow. Harry gestured to the others that they should wait and crawled out of the small opening. He pushed the knot to stop the branches from injuring them and waved Neville to follow him out. Together, they pulled Justin's body through the hole, and then Luna and Simon followed. Together, they dragged Justin as fast as they could away from the tree, before the branches set off again.

If Harry had ever been glad to see Snape, this was the moment. When the muddy, trembling group arrived at the steps leading up to huge oak front doors, it was the Potions Master who was just in the process of closing it. He stopped in the middle of the movement, pivoted on is heels and let his eyes pass from a sobbing Luna to a hunched Neville and Harry, with the lifeless Justin between them and finally to a shuddering Simon. In seconds he had taken over the charge, which the students were all too happy to give away. Snape conjured a stretcher for Justin and thus took the heavy burden from their shoulders. Neville and Harry almost fell onto the castle's front steps.

"Simon, find Dumbledore. I will take them to the Hospital Wing," Snape instructed grimly.

They went inside and Simon immediately sprinted up the steps to the Headmaster's office. Neville, Harry and Luna quietly followed behind Snape's swirling robes to the third floor. Madam Pomfrey hurried to them the instant they passed the door.

"What in Merlin's beard happened?" She lightly touched Justin's hand and forehead, but received no reaction.

"A Dementor's kiss," Snape replied briskly.

Madam Pomfrey stared at him with frightened eyes for a moment. She helped Snape put Justin to rest on a bed; his face was still so pale and then turned to look after the others. Luna couldn't calm herself and kept sobbing, though they were no more tears left for her to cry. Neville just stood in the doorway and stared at Justin. Harry turned to look out the window, away from this mess. Why hadn't he been able to help? Why hadn't the happy thoughts come? It had been such a close call and almost all of them could have been a victim and might now have been lying there like Justin...

"Come here." Madam Pomfrey was handing out big chunks of chocolate. Snape had left the room to inform the other teachers and make sure the rest of the Hogwarts students, who were still enjoying their Hogsmeade trip, would return safely to the grounds. The first bite already made Harry feel better. The cold left his body, but the idea that it was his fault and he could have prevented this wouldn't leave his thoughts.

The door opened again and Harry knew instinctively that Simon and Dumbledore had arrived.
Dumbledore went straight to Madam Pomfrey who was tugging Justin under more blankets and exchange a few whispered words with her. Harry closed his eyes briefly before turning back to the room. Simon was seated on a bed, his back leaning against the wall. His face, too, was unnaturally pale, his eyes shut tightly.

"Where did you encounter the Dementor?" Dumbledore inquired.

"N-Near the Sh-Shrieking Shack." Neville's lips were trembling while he spoke.

"There was more than one - maybe five," Simon added, his eyes still closed.

"It was horrible," Luna said, her body still shaking. "The Dementor went straight for us, Justin panicked. We all did. And then this thing..." She couldn't go on.

"He didn't stand a chance," Neville finished for her and put his arm around the girl.

"I didn't manage to fend it off, "Harry whispered and his eyes were drawn to Justin.

Madam Pomfrey pressed more chocolate onto their hands before drawing curtains around Justin's bed and sparing them the ghastly sight. Harry felt stuffed and wasn't sure he liked more chocolate, but the chewing had a distracting effect.

"The Patronus is no easy charm. Performing if successfully can depend on your current situation. Don't blame yourself Harry. You've gone through a rough time lately, so..." He was interrupted by a new person joining them. "Ah, Felicitas. The other students have returned to the castle, then?" Dumbledore addressed Professor McPherson.

The Head of Phoenix looked as pasty as Simon and could only nod her confirmation. She walked past them to Madam Pomfrey, who accompanied her behind the drawn curtains. They could her gasp.

"I have to inform the school. I wish for you to spend the night here," Dumbledore said and left the four traumatized students to themselves.

"Is there hope?" They heard McPherson ask from behind the curtains.

"Once a Dementor has sucked the soul out, no. There are reports of people who regained the ability to perform vegetative tasks such as eating again, or even walking, but those are rare and only occur when the kiss was interrupted. But in Mr. Finch-Fechtley's case...I'm afraid he won't recover," the patron explained.

"For heaven's sake. Just what am I supposed to tell his parents?" McPherson cried.

Neville, Luna, Simon and Harry retired silently to the furthest corner to avoid the voices coming from Justin's bed. They couldn't bear staying in the room, but Dumbledore hadn't given them a choice. No matter how tired they were, they were too scared to fall asleep.

"I'm sorry." Harry lifted his eyes and saw Neville was speaking to him. "We weren't fair towards you. Or you," he added turning to Simon. "If we hadn't acted this stupidly, maybe...I mean without your help, Luna and me could have..."

Simon nodded and raised a hand to show his understanding. "We were all very lucky."

"No, really. We gave Harry a hard time. It's our fault," Luna interrupted.

"Honestly. Harry had other things on his mind than just the DA. Blocking someone's magical skills takes more than your accusations."

"Don't you have anything better to do than deciding who is to blame?" Harry said, annoyed.

"I'm just trying to say that no one is to blame. Not Luna, not Neville, not you. Dumbledore said as much just minutes ago. Or if you want to blame someone, blame Ron, Hermione, Ginny, me and the entire DA. You've experienced so many adversities and negative memories lately, the tiny bit of happiness stood no chance once the Dementor showed up," Simon continued. "Just don't make the mistake of burying yourself in self-pity."

Time passed until the Nurse and Professor McPherson emerged from behind the white curtains. The Head of Phoenix glanced at them quickly before she left to comfort her students and contact the parents.

"You should change into her pyjamas and try to get some sleep. You all look exhausted," Pomfrey told them and went to the shelves to hastily rummage through them. She seemed to be a bit confused, she was used to many magical injuries, but something like this was surely new territory for her as well. With a flick of her wand more curtains and four sets of clean clothes appeared. They changed and went to their respective beds. Before Harry hopped underneath the blanket, he pulled his curtains aside to address Simon.

"Why did you say it was your fault, too? Without you, I'd have been lost a long time ago," he whispered.

"Well, I thought of the Occlumency lessons. I have to repeatedly explain your weaknesses and strengths to you. You've made progress, but it's not yet enough."

"And why Ginny, Hermione and Ron?"

"Ginny drives you nuts because you're in love with her and too shy to say a word. You care for Hermione, who isn't in her best shape either. And Ron...well, you know that best yourself, don't you?"

Harry sighed and fell back onto the soft pillow.

For a long time, Harry just lay there, staring holes into the air. He had emptied his mind a few times already. The blankness calmed him. Slowly, the light outside faded and Madam Pomfrey returned with bowls of warm soup. After dinner, she extinguished the lights. Harry tossed and turned but still couldn't find sleep. He saw the shapes of the others, all breathing steadily. Finally around midnight, sleep overcame him.

Dementors were closing in. Harry's Patronus was a mere silver mist. The door to the Shack was barricaded. No one could get in. Frightened he rattled the door. Harry was forced to watch the Dementors coming closer and snatching one after the other. Grabbing them by their throats and forcing their mouths open. Luna, Neville, Simon...all were kissed. Then the Dementors turned to Harry. He fought desperately, but darkness surrounded him and pressed the air from his lungs...

"Harry! Harry!" A familiar voice snaked its way through his sleepiness.

"No!" Harry screamed, tears were running down his cheeks. "You won't get me. No!" He fought against the hands trying to pin him to the bed.

"Wake up. Harry!"

Harry stopped abruptly. Those weren't Dementor's claws but human hands. He recognized the blurry image of Simon standing above him.

"Calm down. It's a nightmare," Simon said quietly. "It's over. They're gone, okay?"

Harry sat up, still crying. He couldn't fight the tears and had the feeling it was time he let his emotions flow.

"Madam Pomfrey went to fetch some Dreamless Sleep Potion," Simon said in a soothing voice. "Here, breathe in. You're safe now."

Harry wiped the tears away. His mind focussed again. He saw the hospital walls, the flame of a candle nearby and noticed the sounds from Madam Pomfrey pouring a liquid.

"I just feel...like it was my fault. Like I failed," Harry said with a tremble.

"Do I have to repeat myself? It's not!" Simon exclaimed.

"Are you feeling better, Mr. Potter?" Madam Pomfrey asked and pushed a cup into his hands. "Drink this up."

Harry had some trouble moving the cup to his lips, his hands were shaking so bad. The Nurse nodded encouragingly and then left them alone. Harry took another sip from the potion. His eyes were aching from all the crying and exhaustion.

"Simon?" Harry asked. "What did you see when the Dementors attacked us?"

Simon huffed. "You saw it, too, didn't you? A dead woman in a circle, You-Know-Who, my parents...I have no idea what it was about. It must have been before I was given to Severus. I guess I innocently walked into a Death Eater meeting. You saw Him holding me. I can't say what happened then. I only remember green light and that a man died," he recounted.

"I can see Voldemort, how he transforms back into his human form," Harry said thoughtfully and looked over to the other boy. Simon was staring straight ahead.

"Simon? Are you okay?" Harry was having trouble speaking. The potion was taking effect and fatigue enveloped him. He could no longer keep his eyes open and fell into a deep sleep.

Harry woke up late the next afternoon. He could hear the distant sobs of a woman. Confused, he searched for his glasses and put them on. He sat up in his bed and immediately saw the source of the noises. With the image of half-drawn curtains and a couple standing closely together holding each other, yesterday's events came flowing back. Justin's parents, Muggles, were hunched above their son, trying to understand. When Madam Pomfrey noticed Harry, she hurried to him.

"Mr. Potter. How are you feeling?"

Harry nodded and looked around for the others.

"They left a few hours ago. If you're feeling up to it, you may leave as well. I have to tend to the boy's poor parents," she said hastily.

Harry dressed and walked to the door. Before he left, his gazed found the parents once more. He felt sorry for them. Thoughtfully, he wandered down the halls. Near the Entrance Hall, he noticed Hermione and Ginny, apparently waiting for him. He wasn't sure he could bear company just now, but didn't have a choice. They were blocking the way to the dungeons, apparently determined not to let him slip away again. When Ginny spotted him, she ran to him and embraced him in a warm hug. Thankfully, Harry returned it and clung to her.

"We were so worried. We've been waiting for hours," Ginny said.

Hermione was a bit more distant, not knowing how to behave around them, but happy that he hadn't suffered injuries nonetheless.

"How are you?" she asked.

Harry shook his head. "I watched Justin's soul being sucked out."

"I know. Sorry." She looked at him with sad eyes.

"Do you know how Luna, Neville and Simon are?"

"No. We only met Simon briefly. He didn't say a lot. I think he want down to your common room," Hermione said.

"Yesterday was really frightening. We were in the Three Broomsticks when Snape came in and told us all to return to Hogwarts right away. He didn't eve say why, just instructed us to return to the Great Hall and stick together," Ginny told him. "Then Dumbledore came and explained the situation, but he never said how you were. He looked exhausted."

Harry could only nod. He didn't care, he only wanted to see the others and make sure they really were doing fine.

"Please, excuse me. I think I have to get some more rest," he said briskly and quickly vanished behind the door to the dungeons.

"Severus, please. I need to know."

Harry stopped dead in his tracks. Simon's anxious voiced sounded from Snape's office door, which was slightly ajar. Harry crept closer.

"Calm down, Simon," the Potions Master replied, a bit of resignation swinging in his voice. "Simon, I doubt..." He sighed. "Alright. I suppose you won't rest until you find out, so I might as well tell you. Did you ever come across a ritual called 'Cleptorus'?" A brief moment of silence followed, in which Harry held his breath. Snape raised his voice again.

"The Cleptorus ritual is very difficult to perform and belongs to the darkest forms of Magic. It is used to project a wizard's unique skill onto another wizard, killing him in the process. It is impossible for a single wizard to successfully complete it, so when the Dark Lord attempted to gain more supremacy, he needed four powerful wizards gathered around him to speak the incantation." Snape stopped and Harry could hear the soft scratching of a chair on the stony floor.

"Your parents were involved, Regulus Black and me." Simon exhaled loudly enough for Harry to hear. Gripped by this information, Harry tiptoed even closer to the door.

"It was my task to prepare the potion. Then, everyone gathered in a circle around the Dark Lord and his victim, who was bound and still alive. They tore his beating heart out, which concealed the skill the Dark Lord was interested in." Snape let the words sink in, before he continued, "Why your parents had taken you with them, I can not say."

"Who was the woman inside the circle?" Simon whispered.

"Mildred Poweread, she was on Dumbledore's side. The ritual was about to be finished, when you tripped into the circle. You seriously destroyed the Dark Lord's plans. The skill was not projected onto him, but instead onto you."

Again, silence followed this revelation. Finally, Simon whispered, "What?"

"Mildred was an extraordinarily skilled Legilimens, in a way that occurs only every hundred years or so. Your abilities are now much more advanced than the Dark Lords or mine," Snape elaborated. Simon seemed to need time to digest this; it took him minutes until he asked his next question.

"What happened then? I mean, he must have been fuming."

"Certainly. He was outraged, but..."

Suddenly, steps echoed through the corridor and Harry quickly pulled away from the door and pretended to be walking towards the common room. From the corner of his eye, he saw Malfoy and his cronies turning around the corner. Malfoy made a move as if to hex Harry, but Snape's audible voice prevented an attack.

Harry spent the rest of the evening in his dorm. He was tired and plagued by his own minds accusations. Still, the talk he had overheard repeatedly mocked his thoughts. He was curious to find out about Snape's last answer, but too embarrassed of his eavesdropping to confront Simon. No matter his musings, Simon didn't show up, so Harry was left to ponder what had happened after young Simon had crossed Voldemort's intentions.

The castle was covered beneath a blanket of melancholy. Justin's parents had come and taken their son home, against Dumbledore's advice to take him to St. Mungos. They were determined to find closure and exclude all magic from their lives. The same magic that had once inspired Justin and now had brought so much sorrow to their family. Harry preferred to come to terms with what he witnessed that fateful night on his own and ignored his friend's attempts to lend a supporting shoulder. Days passed and slowly the usual hustle and bustle was restored to the castle.

Harry, however, continued to avoid any kind of social contact. He walked around with averted eyes, entered classrooms at the last second and left again dead on the bell. At night, his brain was still occupied with reliving the scary scenes he had been unable to prevent. During the days, his guilt-ridden conscious wouldn't let him concentrate on his schoolwork.

"Harry! How much longer do you intend to avoid talking about it?" Ginny had appeared out of nowhere and was now blocking his way.

"Ginny, please."

"You've been silent for ages. Not talking to anyone, including Simon!" Her face was flushed in frustration. "But if that's what you want, to loose all your friends, fine by me," she burst out and turned to storm away again.

Harry hastily stretched one hand out and held her by her robes. "I'm sorry. I'm just so tired."

"I know. But it won't get better when you're hiding in that hole of yours."

Harry nodded. She was right. There were two things he wanted to talk to her about, one being Justin, the other his feelings for her, but he couldn't get the words to leave his mouth.

"Oh, Harry. About your broom -- I don't need to borrow it any more. In March Gryffindor will be playing Slytherin and since we can hardly play on one broom together, I found a new solution. I can have Ron's."

Harry smiled. He really wouldn't mind sitting on one broom with her, but that was another story. He would also give her his broom during this particular game, even if that meant he had to fly on a school broom or run around below.

"You and Ron are talking again, then?" The negative feelings were slowly leaving his stomach and were replaced by a certain weakness in his knees.

"No, not really. The thing with Justin really shook him; they were hanging out a lot before. No, mum arranged it. You know how tough she can be."

A smile forced Harry's lips to curve. "How is he?"

"Well, I heard that he and Neville had a fight, once again about Simon."

"How come? I thought they shared their opinion on Simon?"

"Apparently not any more. Neville was very impressed how you both jumped to their help. I think he's still a bit suspicious, but not as bad as before."

The two hindered lovebirds strolled down the corridors, not taking notice of where they were headed. Both didn't care, they enjoyed each other's company too much.

"Ron still hates Simon, though who knows why."

"Just think of the Yule Ball," Ginny reminded him.

"Ah no. It started much earlier. Ron broke up with Hermione because of Simon first, then got mad because she developed an interest in Simon."

Ginny stopped walking. "I think he's very lonely. He starts a fight with everyone, Justin's gone, Neville had a change of heart and now he's the last one who rejects the idea of Simon being a good guy."

"Na, come on. You were at the last DA meeting, weren't you?"

"Yes, but most of them now regret what a scene they caused. Everyone knows that we almost managed to produce a real Patronus. Justin belonged to the advanced students, if he would have had one or two more lessons, he might have been able to fend the Dementor off."

Harry paled. He hadn't given this option any thought so far, but now he realized that it really was his fault. He had denied the others the chance to learn from him how to defend themselves. He shuddered.

Ginny's words stabbed through the mist in his mind. "Hermione's been asked several times already if there's really no way we can't continue," she was saying.

"No. Not with me." Harry shook his head furiously. "They don't accept me and accuse me of fraternizing with the enemy, who just happens to be my best friend."

"But they changed their minds!" Ginny opened her hands in despair. "Harry, at least think about it. This can't happen again. It just can't."

Why did he react in such a harsh way? He could clearly see the fear of another attack in her eyes. He took a few deep breaths to calm himself.

"Okay. I'll think about it."

Then he bid her Good Bye. Instead of telling her how he felt about her, he had yelled at her for no reason. Great.

At a snail's pace, Harry returned to the common room. He noticed Simon and Frederic involved with some homework assignment near the fire. Harry resisted the temptation to walk over and ask for advice with Ginny or to give Simon the chance to find out what he had overheard. Instead he retreated once more to his dorm, sat cross-legged on his bed, took out parchment and quill and began to brood over a letter to Ginny. But he didn't get far. Malfoy banged the door open and eying the parchment he informed Harry, "Snape's in the common room, we're all supposed to show up. Now."

Quickly, Harry stashed the few written words underneath his pillow. He didn't even want to imagine the humiliation if Malfoy found out about his crush.

What Snape had to say was a rather nasty tale. Owen Caulwell, a third-year Ravenclaw, had been at the receiving end of the Corpus Inflamare curse. Naturally, all Slytherins were suspects. Caulwell's testimony of having seen a Slytherin uniform before he became unconscious was evidence enough for most of who had performed the curse. Snape threateningly stared into a few eyes, but he wasn't able to force the responsible person to step forward. Duels between Slytherins and other houses were certainly not a new one, but the fire-curse, which could be fatal, was definitely in a new league. Harry exchanged a glance with Simon, who was leaning against an opposite wall. Close by, Nott, Malfoy and his gang were hiding their gloating faces. Harry could hear Malfoy's whisper, "Any idea who did it?" But he only received a general shrug of shoulders all around.

"We are no longer dealing with schoolboy's pranks. This is a serious matter. The culprit will be caught and shall expect severe punishment. Be assured that scrubbing cauldrons won't be it." Snape threw a menacing look around the quiet room, causing the students in the first row to shift a bit further back, and then he strode out again, slamming the door shut behind him.

Harry thought it best to get away from the heated, and partly celebrating, debates all around him. Seconds later, he found himself back on his bed, the letter to Ginny in his hands. And again he was interrupted by the opening of the door. Hastily, he hid it under his blanket, but sighed in relief when he recognized Simon.

"Hi," he said whilst ironing the parchment with his hands.

"Just wondering when we'd start Occlumency again," Simon said.

"Don't care," Harry answered, his attention focused on the words before him.

"Tomorrow night?" Simon suggested.

Harry nodded briskly, his tongue squeezed between his teeth in concentration.

"You're writing a letter to Ginny?"

Harry nodded again. Simon came closer and risked a glance upon the parchment.

"Great, finally. This sounds good," he commented. "But if write another word of weak knees, it's gonna sound boring."

"How..." Harry exhaled when he saw Simon's raised eyebrows.

"Leave it as it is. Simple but straight to the point," Simon advised.

"Do you really think so?" Harry was still torn by doubts. He reread the lines and really, it didn't sound too bad after all. Especially considering that it was his first love letter. He signed it and excused himself to sprint to the Owlery. Hedwig danced on the poles excitedly when she realized Harry had a task for her. He stroke her feathers tenderly and watched her take off with his letter, which contained his true feelings for Ginny.

TBC