The Case of the Fire-Breathing Chicken

Reported by: Robert MacFusty
Date: 4 November, 1995
Findings: Inconclusive; the chicken was of indeterminate origin and parentage
Recommendation: Quarantine in fire-proof cage; breeding forbidden, with any species

Description of creature: Chicken, white feathers, yellow legs and feet, red comb. Observation confirmed the reports that the chicken did indeed occasionally breathe fire. Further observation revealed what looked like small fangs inside its beak; these could not be examined closely due to the fire-breathing. When other chickens of the same breed were observed, it was determined that this chicken was rather larger than its relations at the farm where it was hatched. After the chicken had been under observation for two months, it began to develop bronze-colored horns on its head and similar spikes on its tail.

The fowl in question was brought to our attention by Hubert Slimeweed, resident of Hogsmeade. The bird is owned by Mr. & Mrs. Norton, farmers who reside outside the above-mentioned village. Mr. Slimeweed, a volunteer fire-wizard, reported becoming suspicious after the Fire Department was called to the Norton farm half a dozen times during the spring to put out small fires. “The last time, the Norton’s farm hand ran after us as we were leaving, calling us back to put out another blaze that had started just as we were leaving. I noticed this rather large chicken was nearby and was not, apparently, afraid of the flames like his fellows. His feathers weren’t even singed.” 1

Mrs. Norton was asked about the chicken. “I knew it wa’n’t your ordinary chicken even ‘fore it hatched, ‘cause o’ the egg. One of my hens wa’ very possessive o’ a certain egg, and ‘at was in the coop I’d shut th’ rooster out o‘, so it was s’posed to be an egg fer eating, not fer setting. But she wouldn’t move off’n it. Fin’ly, I got a glimpse o’ it. It wa’ at least twice as big as a normal egg, and it wa’ sor‘ o‘ a gray colour, and very hard! It took almost three months t’ hatch, too! Toward the end, th’ hen lost interest an’ kicked it outta her nest. Th’ sow slept with it till it hatched.” 2

Mr. Norton added that the chick looked normal, though slightly larger than most. “It did seem to grow rather quickly,” he noted. 3

Asked about any suspicious activity around the farm at about the time the hen had laid the egg in question, Mrs. Norton replied that she’d seen a large man with bushy black hair and beard lumbering away from the chicken coop one evening.4 Mr. Norton noted that he’d found the book Dragon Breeding for Pleasure and Profit in the farm hand’s bunk, but the hand claimed to be as mystified as Norton by the chicken’s strange characteristics. Soon afterward, the farm hand left town suddenly.5

Mrs. Norton commented that among the items left behind by the farm hand, she’d found a turkey baster.6

Many other residents of Hogsmeade and the surrounding area were also interviewed for this investigation. A patron in the Hog’s Head Inn noted that he’d often observed shady looking characters in the pub, looking to unload questionable items, though he declined to give specifics.7 The barman, when asked if he’d seen the Norton’s farm hand, grudgingly acknowledged that he’d seen the man in conversation with a “large man with a bushy black beard,” but asked that this information be kept confidential. “I don’t ask and I normally don’t tell. My customers like it that way. I’m only telling you because of your Ministry badge.”8

When asked about dragons, several residents of Hogsmeade remembered that four dragons had been present on the grounds of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry during November, 1994, as part of the Triwizard Tournament.9 Staff members of the school declined to comment.

Footnotes

1. Hubert Slimeweed, Hogsmeade. Personal interview. 15 July, 1995. back to text

2. Mrs. Norton, Hogs Knuckle Farm. Personal interview. 20 July, 1995. back to text

3. Mr. Norton, Hogs Knuckle Farm. Personal interview. 20 July, 1995. back to text

4. Mrs. Norton, ibid. back to text

5. Mr. Norton, ibid. back to text

6. Mrs. Norton, ibid. back to text

7. Anonymous Hog’s Head Patron, Personal interview, 21 July, 1995. back to text

8. Aberforth Dumbledore, barkeep, Hog’s Head Inn, Hogsmeade. Personal interview, 21 July, 1995. back to text

9. Various anonymous residents of Hogsmeade. Personal interviews. 21-22 July, 1995. back to text