Rating:
PG
House:
Riddikulus
Ships:
Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks
Characters:
Harry Potter
Genres:
Humor General
Era:
Harry and Classmates Post-Hogwarts
Spoilers:
Half-Blood Prince
Stats:
Published: 06/20/2007
Updated: 06/20/2007
Words: 793
Chapters: 1
Hits: 1,078

Harry's Will

Moretta

Story Summary:
Harry is dead and this is his will. Character death implied (not shown, it's just his will), but it's not sad and a couple of strange pairings. I've been told it's funny, but slightly disturbing.

Chapter 01

Posted:
06/20/2007
Hits:
1,078


Harry Potter's Will

I, Harry James Potter, being of sound body and mind write my last will and testament.

All that has been written has to be followed; my magic will make sure of it.

Dear everybody, I have a few things to say to you all and since I can't write letters to all of you, I want you to know that I enjoyed my time with you when not troubled.

I am very glad that I befriended all of you and I want you to remember me as Harry, a Gryffindor, a Seeker, a friend, but not as The-Boy-Who-Lived, or The Saviour.

I love you all.

Dear Dumbledore, you're right.

I know you're dead, but I wanted to write anyway, I wanted to say that I understand what you meant when you said that to the organized mind, death is just the next great adventure.
I was so angry with you for long... I learned how to let go.

Thank you for your concern and wisdom.

Dear Ron, don't blame anyone, especially yourself. Once I defeated Voldemort I had no purpose in life, but now in death I do.

I can't live without her, so I'll die for her.

You were my best friend for almost 8 long years and I love you like a brother. Nothing will take that away from you.

I want your family to have the money in my Gringotts vault. The key is in a knitted sock that your mum made me, at the bottom of my school trunk.

Keep the Quidditch team the best and win the Cup for Gryffindor, captain!

I want you to have my dad's invisibility cloak.

Oh, and Ron... shag Hermione. Open your eyes, both of you! Everyone can see that you're made for each other.

Dear Hermione, please do not blame yourself. This I beg of you.

This has nothing to do with you, nothing whatsoever, and I know that you'll blame yourself given half a chance.

You should understand. If I can't have her in life, I'll have her in death.

I love you more than anything or anyone else, both you and Ron.

You were like the sister I never had, the best friend I could ever ask for, hope for.

Take care of Ron for me.

To you I leave all my books and Hedwig, she likes you.

And, 'Mione? Shag Ron, it's plain to everybody that you two should get it together.

Dear Ginny, I'm sorry. I liked you, but I could never love you.

Dean, on the other hand, adores you. You both have my blessing.

To you I leave the Marauders Map. Ask Ron for it, and then show it to the twins, they'll explain what to do.

Dear Draco, I can't call you Malfoy anymore. You became less of a rival and more of a friend during the time before the final battle.

You became my friend and I'll be forever thankful that we managed to get over our petty, almost non-existent differences.

Thank you for being a proud, maddeningly obstinate, painfully stubborn Malfoy who won't bow down to anyone!

I leave you everything and anything that involves Potions (standard pewter cauldron & all!)

I wish that you could befriend Ron and Hermione: they'll be good loyal friends. If Ron won't accept it, which he won't at the beginning, talk to 'Mione. She'll understand, she'll accept.

To Remus Lupin: I leave you Number 12 Grimmauld Place. Do anything you want with it.

The only thing I ask is for you to something about Mrs Black's painting, so she won't scare yours and Tonks' kids.

I can't call her Nymphadora and Mrs Lupin is just too strange.

Love you both and your children too.

Dear Hagrid, thank you for being the first person from the magical world that I ever met.

I wouldn't change that for the world.

You stayed by me when no one else did and I love you.

Say hello to Norbert from me.

To all the teachers: I am honoured to have been your pupil (except Professor Trelawney. It was an experience, certainly, but my death has been predicted too many times and in too many different ways for her to not get it right at least once!).

You truly are the best in my opinion, including Professor Snape, the greatest Potions Master in Britain. I hope you'll enjoy torturing the future generations of children.

Dear Professor McGonagall, you were an excellent head of House and a fine Headmistress, one of the best Hogwarts will ever have.

To my friends, once again: I really do love you all, just not as much as I love her.

To Myrtle, in the girls' bathroom on the third floor: I'm coming, my love.