Horny Harry and Randy Ron

Horny Harry and Randy Ron

(by Moony-Mike)

"Oh, what's wrong with these guys? Have the hormones at last taken over their entire minds?"

Hermione was obviously annoyed and irritated. She was looking at Harry and Ron, who were standing together with their current girlfriends, Parvati and Padma Patil. All four of them had just come out of an empty classroom on the fourth floor, all sweating and red in their faces - and judging by the looks especially of the girls, it had been a long and passionate snogging time therein.

Parvati and Padma looked slightly embarrassed by the sight of Hermione, who wasn't able to hide an utmost disapproval in her eyes. Both of them tried to straighten their robes. Padma was pulling the collar a bit higher than usually, making an attempt to cover some clearly visible snogging marks on her neck.

Harry and Ron, however, couldn't help starting to grin peevishly, but self-content at the same time. Ron pushed his sweating fringe out of his face, looked straight into Hermione's eyes and just shrugged. That seemed to be last straw for Hermione. She sent them all a glance that could have killed, then turned on her heel and stalked away, apparently trying hard to keep composure.

The boys couldn't hold on any more. They burst into a fit of laughter. After having exchanged a puzzled gaze, the Patil twins joined them, and all of them weren't able to breathe properly for a few minutes.

* * *

Hermione still seemed to be angry with her two best friends when Harry entered the Gryffindor common room ten minutes later, finding her in a corner with her usual pile of books and parchment. He grinned to himself and went to her table while Parvati, who had come in with him, went up to the girls' dormitories to change robes.

"Hey, Herm", he greeted her carefully. "Mind if I sit down?"

She didn't look up, but shook her head, so Harry sat down next to her. For a few minutes neither of them spoke a word.

"Hermione..." Harry started, but was interrupted by her snapping voice.

"Where's Ron?"

Harry shrugged. "Dunno. I reckon he's walking Padma to the Ravenclaws' dorm to say good night. Didn't see 'cause Parvati and I were... um... well..."

"Harry James Potter! What the hell has gotten into you and Ron lately? The only thing you two seem to think about is snogging all day long and... and..."

"And what?" asked Harry a bit annoyed, but unable to avoid smirking.

"Well, I think you know very well what I am talking about."

"I don't have the slightest clue about that, Hermione Granger. I have no idea about what you might eventually be thinking. Or are you telling me you have been keeping sneaking up behind Ron and myself looking for any hints of mischief or whatever you might expect any of us to be doing? What the bloody hell have you seen or noticed and what are you blaming me for?"

"For heaven's sake, Harry, I don't have to tell you..."

"If you don't have to tell me, then I do have to suggest you to mind your own business, I think!"

Harry was suddenly startled about his cutting reply. He looked straight into Hermione's eyes and gulped. "Sorry", he whispered, "I didn't want to yell at you..."

"Never mind, Harry. But what I wanted to say was, now, I've been watching your progress and behaviour in class for the last few weeks. Yours and Ron's, to be honest. And I'm worrying a bit, Harry. Remember potions last Friday. If I hadn't interfered in time, Snape certainly would have taken not only fifty points from Gryffindor but put you and Ron in detention for at least a month. If I hadn't snatched that little letter out of Malfoy's clutches right before he could hand it to his beloved professor..."

"Oh my God, Herm, would you please shut up for a moment? Okay, if this appreciates you, I am grateful for that last-second help of yours. But that's not the point." He sat across from her and took the quill out of her hands (she had been pointing menacingly with it during her little lecture). He went on very calmly. "Is there any chance that you just acknowledge Ron's and my relationships and whatever comes along with them? Could you perhaps just accept that there are girls who we have been dating for several weeks now? Girls who we are in love with? Girls who are in love with us?"

"Oh, great! And what about me? Who cares about me?" Hermione snapped. "I thought I was your best friend. There was nothing that could separate the three of us. And now? You've been treating Parvati since a month ago..."

"What do you mean by treating?" Harry began, but he was interrupted by Parvati, who had just appeared by his side and purred in his ear, though intentionally very audible to Hermione: "Oh, Harry, I simply love to be - treated by that - big thing of yours..."

Harry blushed furiously. He didn't know what to say for a moment.

Hermione, however, gave them both a disgusted look, snatched her books and parchment roughly from the table and hurriedly left for the dorms.

Harry sighed. "I really hope she'll get over it as soon as possible."

"Don't worry, love, she will", whispered Parvati, before giving him a kiss on the cheek. He embraced her and pulled her next to him on the place where Hermione had been sitting just an instant ago. She grabbed around his waist and thereby brushed her hand over his hips, purposely touching his most private part. He blushed even harder and muttered in her ear: "Hey, not here - it's crowded all around."

She smirked at him and replied under her breath: "But I see - I can feel you're ready for it, eh?"

He swallowed and murmured: "Five minutes - boys' dorm, okay?"

She smiled with an expectant expression, and he left, trying to look about as innocently as possible.

* * *

"No, Ron, wait!" Seamus bellowed through the common room. He had just spotted Ron Weasley entering through the portrait hole and heading straight to the stairs that led up to the boys' dormitories.

Ron stopped and turned to face the source of the sudden voice.

"What's the matter?" he asked when he caught sight of Seamus and Dean, who stood near the fireplace and were frantically beckoning him to come over. "I'm soaked out and would very much like to take a shower and change into clean clothes."

"That can wait", said Seamus and dragged him over to his and Dean's place. "Just come over here for a while!"

"What's so bloody urgent, guys?"

"We suggest you not to go up right now", Dean answered and urged Ron to sit down.

Ron struggled himself free from Dean's firm grip. "What do you mean? What could be the reason not to get washed and changed right now? I'm smelling awfully..."

Seamus pulled him back down. "Calm down, Ron, and give Harry a bit more time up there."

Ron looked at him, puzzled.

"Harry? A bit more time?"

"Well - um..." Dean began, "... now, he's - well - Harry's up in the dorm and he's - he's not alone..."

Seamus nodded fervently. "Parvati, you know..."

Ron got the point. "Oh - right - well..."

"And by the way - where have you been hanging around for almost an hour after dinner, mate?" asked Dean curiously. "There was no class, no detention..."

"... but just a cute girl with long brown hair and a body..." Seamus made a very obvious gesture with his hands, forming a female body.

Ron went scarlet. He had a sudden lump in his throat and wasn't able to bring out a clear word. He cleared his throat loudly and stared into the fire as if there suddenly had appeared an interesting and utterly distracting item just out of nowhere.

Dean and Seamus giggled softly.

"Shut up, you two!" hissed Ron out of the corner of his mouth, noticing Ginny eyeing him curiously from the second next table.

* * *

It was almost eleven o'clock in the evening.

Ron had fallen asleep on the sofa in front of the fireplace while Dean and Seamus had kept on chatting vividly the whole evening. Neville was still in the hospital wing after having burnt himself by melting a cauldron in potions class.

So no-one was in the sixth year's boys' dormitory. Except...

Harry Potter had put a silencing charm around his four poster bed and shut the curtains, keeping them closed by magic.

He and Parvati had done it twice that night, both were exhausted and lay on the bed, panting.

"Oh my gorgeous tiger", whispered Parvati when she had regained calm breath again. "That was wonderful. Come on, do it again!"

Harry groaned. "Oh my god, Parvati, you're insatiable!"

"Go on! Once more, Harry!"

"I'd say we've got to get some sleep. And by the way - I'm running short of condoms lately."

Parvati grinned mischievously. "Oh, if that's the problem - no matter."

She took her wand out of the pocket of her robes that lay next to the bed, pointed at her stomach and muttered: "Contraceptivum."

Harry gaped at her. Parvati's grin widened, and she said: "Now we won't need those disturbing little rubbers for a month."

She put her wand away and rolled herself on top of Harry, caressing his whole body with restless hands. Quickly she took advantage of his newly awoken hard arousal, and for the third time that night the world around them drifted away, drowned in an endless sea of irresistible emotions...

* * *

The next day was a Saturday, so normally no-one woke up very early.

But Harry was different. He had become used to waking up at the latest at six o'clock in the morning even at weekend, because the former Gryffindor Quidditch captain, Oliver Wood, used to treat the team with early morning practice on Saturdays and - if necessary - even on Sundays throughout years.

So, Harry woke up at half past five. Dawn had already begun, because it was still September and the days hadn't started to become too short.

First Harry wondered why he was so stiff and his back was aching. But then he realised that he was not the only person in his bed. Parvati was still there, fast asleep. So there had not been very much space for either of them. He struggled his right leg, which was entwined with Parvati's left one, carefully free from her and sat upright. He quickly put on a pair of boxers, got out of bed and stretched.

Looking around, Harry noticed that the other beds in the dorm were empty. He wondered whether he had missed the start of holiday, but then it dawned to him that probably the other boys had noticed him going up last night, and Parvati following a few minutes later. So apparently no-one of them wanted to disturb the romantic rendezvous, and they must have tactfully stayed down in the common room.

Harry felt guilty, having withheld the comfortable beds from his roommates.

He put on his dressing gown and sneaked out of the dorm in order to look if everything was all right in the common room. He prepared for being yelled at, at least by Seamus, who was well known for his need for much 'beauty sleep' and for his fiery temperament, if something didn't go the way he wanted it to go.

But it was not Seamus or one of the other boys by who he was blown at as if he had just caused the end of the world.

"HARRY JAMES POTTER, WHAT IN ALL HEAVENS' NAME DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?"

It was Hermione Granger.

She was standing on top of the staircase, hands on her hips, seeming to have waited for some time for him getting up and leaving the dormitory.

After having recovered from nearly a heart attack, Harry simply brought out: "Uh, oh, there's trouble ahead..."

"If you think..." Hermione started, but she was interrupted by Dean Thomas, who had climbed up the stairs. Downstairs behind them, Ron and Seamus were shaking by a fit of laughter.

"Hermione, please!" Dean tried to calm her down. "If you keep on yelling like that you'll wake the whole castle - let alone be serious competition for Professor McGonagall, something she definitely will not appreciate."

"Oh, you boys - you..." Hermione enraged herself again, "... you don't even have a clue about what he's done - AND YOU, RON..."

"Oh, shut up, Herm", Seamus interfered, "you're not seriously starting to explain to Dean and me what Harry and Ron were doing with their love birds yesterday. I mean - we're no longer little kids, you know..."

"Don't you back them up and make fun of me, Finnigan!" snapped Hermione. "I was really worried when I saw Parvati's bed empty an hour ago. You don't know what could have happened to her..."

"Oh, I think Harry's in state to - er... protect her rather effectively from every danger that could waylay her at night, that is", said Dean with a devilish grin.

There was a second of silence, then all the boys, including Harry, burst into laughter.

Harry, who realised that Hermione was not in the slightest mood of being laughed at at that morning, stopped and became serious again, then looked her in the eyes.

"Hermione", he said quietly, "I would really like to talk to you about all this - and I think Ron will, too. We owe you that, because we're your best friends, and we don't want to loose this wonderful friendship. Why don't we go out for a walk in the grounds after breakfast? Only the three of us, no-one else. What do you think?"

Hermione sighed heavily, but she finally agreed.

* * *

It took Harry some time to convince Ron to join him and Hermione for a walk after breakfast.

"I don't think it's necessary at all, Harry", Ron stated. "What does she have to do with it? You're dating Parvati, and my girlfriend is Padma. These are not Hermione's relationships, you know. Why does she always have to put her nose in other people's business?"

"You are right, Ron", said Harry patiently. "It's not her business at all. But you must admit that she has been our best friend for more than five years. We have never had any secrets, we shared our entire school lives. I reckon she's feeling excluded from our lives since we've got ourselves girlfriends."

"But she isn't!"

"That's right, Ron. Perhaps it will do if we explicitly assure her of it. Let's just talk to her - it won't hurt. Okay?"

"Okay."

So they made their way out of the castle after breakfast, together with Hermione.

"I don't understand you guys", Hermione began bluntly. "I remember when you asked the Patil twins to the Yule Ball two years ago. You didn't look too much at them that whole evening, to put it mildly. And what's now? You don't do anything else but keep on snogging your minds out with them - if not more!" she added, glaring especially at Harry, who instantly went scarlet in his face.

Ron, however, chuckled a bit and couldn't help muttering under his breath: "As if she was our mother."

Unfortunately, Hermione heard this.

"RONALD WEASLEY..." she started, but Harry had gotten enough.

"Hermione Granger, now it is your turn to listen, AND PLEASE do not interrupt me!" he ordered. Hermione was dumbfounded about being addressed so harshly by Harry, who usually didn't raise his voice that quickly. Harry noticed her astonishment and smiled softly at her.

He took her by the hand and led her to a small grass hill near the shore of the large black lake. Ron followed curiously.

They all sat down on the hill. Harry turned to Hermione and looked her straight in the eyes.

"Hermione, I want you to know two important things - very important things. First of all you are Ron's and my best friend. You have been it for a couple of years and you still are. We both love you and it would be the biggest mess to be in being without this great friendship.

"Second: I love Parvati Patil and I am dating her. Ron's the same with her sister Padma. They are our girlfriends. So - naturally - we also like kissing them, and why not even more than that.

"- Will you please let me continue! -

"Herm, I assure you that there is nothing going on between Parvati and me that anyone of us doesn't want or by that one would be hurt. It is all out of our free will. I'm sure it's the same between Padma and Ron.

"I don't know how much you know about it or how much experience you have with it, but one can barely describe with words what it means to a boy to love a girl and being loved by her. You are right, I didn't care about Parvati during the Yule Ball two years ago; I was utterly relieved when that opening dance was over and I could slip her hand. But things can change. A lot of time has passed since that day. Parvati is in the same year as we are, she attends almost every class I do. I don't know when it happened, but there was a time when I began watching her no longer for being that childish, gossiping-around girl - but for what she has become throughout all the time I know her: a nice and pretty young woman with a good sense of humour and a warm heart.

"And for that I love her, Hermione.

"I don't want to loose our friendship, but I can't help loving Parvati Patil and wanting to be with her. I want you to understand this, Herm."

For a few seconds, Hermione only gaped at Harry, seeming to have lost speech.

"So - so..." Hermione began, not knowing exactly what she was about to say, "... it's then - not just - well, you know..."

"... snogging and shagging, I guess?" Harry smirked.

Hermione suddenly blushed furiously. She gulped and nodded.

Harry took her hands. "Did you really regard me for such an emotionless guy, led only by balance of hormones, thinking no longer with my brain but with my balls, only taking sexual advantage of the girl I'm dating?" he asked very quietly.

She was a bit shocked by his frankness. But then she lowered her head and whispered: "I'm sorry, Harry."

Harry nodded, and then he hugged her tightly.

"It's all right. And I want you to know that there's nothing that could separate us as the friends we've been for all these years, okay?" he said.

Hermione turned to Ron, who had watched the scene, an expression of surprise on his face.

"And - I guess you love Padma, don't you?" she asked awkwardly.

Ron blushed slightly, but he returned her gaze.

"Yes, Hermione. - Well, I know we dated for a few months back last year, and that was really great. But I hope you - you won't kill me for going out with Padma now. It's just - just like Harry said, it's love. - I don't want to say I don't love you, but..."

"Oh Ron, it's all right!" Hermione smiled at him, and then hugged him, too.

Harry had been grinning, watching Ron stammering clumsily.

Ron checked his watch. "Harry!" he exclaimed, horrified. "Harry - we're late for... um..."

"... snogging time, eh?" Hermione finished, smirking at them.

The boys went scarlet and looked down.

"No matter, guys. Go on! Don't stand up your ladies!"

They got up, and Harry and Ron started to run towards the castle. After a few steps, Harry stopped and turned back to Hermione.

"What about Hogsmeade next weekend, by the way? All five of us?" he proposed.

"Okay", Hermione answered. "But - what are you gibbering about the five of us?"

"Well - you surely want to come with us - and the twins, of course!"

Hermione had caught them up and was now looking at them with a broad smile.

"You guys are sometimes rather distracted, and you don't watch me very carefully for a change, do you?"

Harry and Ron exchanged a puzzled gaze.

"Well, if you did, you might perhaps have noticed a certain Mr Justin Finch-Fletchley around me lately..."

With that, she left them standing there, dumbstruck.

"I can't believe it", Ron started, waving around with his long arms. "I just can't believe it! Lecturing us, but she herself probably sneaking around at night with that - that Hufflepuff-git!"

"Just let her, Ron! Come on, otherwise Parvati and Padma will no longer even turn their cute arses towards us!"

* * *