Hell-flower

~~ Chapter one ~~

~~ Hell-flower ~~

"This was my hell, living without you here

Even heaven is hell, if somehow you were not there"

Disciple- My hell

Severus Snape had been waiting in the outskirts of the forbidden forest for fifteen minutes. He didn't like having to wait. It was his last day in Hogwarts, and if he had anything to do with it, he would never return here again. He couldn't understand why Lily had told him to be here if she wasn't even here herself!

Lily was running as fast as she could. She had lost track of time, and was fifteen minutes late for meeting Sev. She knew he'd be mad as hell. Suddenly she was falling, and she didn't know why. Down, down, she fell. Just before she hit the ground twelve storey's below, she heard sickeningly hysterical laughter, and someone screaming her name.

James ran forward, and looked down off the edge of the third storey staircase. He had seen her fall, and screamed her name, but there was nothing that he could do to stop her falling. He ran down the remaining flights of stairs, and knelt next to her immobile body. She was still warm. He broke down in uncontrollable sobs, his breath coming in heaving gasps. She was dead, and he could not live without her. He climbed to the top, twelfth landing. He waited until the staircase started to change, and without a second thought, jumped off of the edge. His robes flew out behind him like angel wings as he screamed, and then he was no more. His body now lay next to Lily's.

Severus was tired of waiting for Lily. He exited the forest, and started back towards the castle. He entered, and what he saw made him shout aloud with rage and sadness. His Lily was on the floor. Her legs and arms were contorted at odd angles, and her face was covered with her long fiery-red hair. He ran to her, brushed her hair out of her eyes, and sobbed. He had never loved anyone but her. It wasn't his fault that he was in Slytherin, and that they had been separated by years of a 'muggle-born vs. pureblood' war. She would never return to him.

"Sev," she would say to him. "I love you, and only you. You know that, right?"

He would reply "My Lily of the Valley, I love you so much."

Now she was gone! How was he going to live with himself? He would turn to the only place he knew would willingly help him. Voldemort had been gaining power for quite some time now, and Severus didn't know where to turn to, if not to the one place that could preserve him. He saw something sticking out of the pocket of Lily's robes. A letter.

He took it out, and sat down cross-legged next to her body.

Dear Sev,

I love you, and only you. You know that, right? Sometimes I made it difficult for you to love me back, and you made it difficult for me to love you, but we did, didn't we?

Remember that one time we did it? It was awkward and special at the same time. It was both of our first times. I'll always love you for saving yourself for me, as I did for you.

I had a baby. You thought it was James' baby but I never slept with him. I don't love him. I loathe him, even though I know he loves me. However, for the safety of our baby, I'm going to marry him.

If anything should happen to me, I want you to know that Harry (that's what I called him) will be safe. I've made Sirius Black his godfather. As far as Sirius knows, James is the father.

You are Harry's father. Please don't hate me; I really did want to tell you. Please don't ever forget me, Sev. I have to go into hiding. I can't tell you where I'm going, so don't ask. I'll miss you.

Harry looks like you. His second name is Severus, but I had to pretend to name him after James. Whether I like it or not, James is an honorable man. Even though he hates you, he's looking after your child as if it's his own.

With love,

Lily and Harry.

Severus cried then. He knew that he would never be a good enough father for Harry, but he could stay at Hogwarts, and become a good teacher.

Lily was his hot-blooded friend, girlfriend, and now, nothing. She was dead. She was his beautiful lover. She was his Hell-flower.