Petrified

Petrified

Hermione

Figure it out, Harry...Ron. It's right there - in my hand! Harry - you're looking right at it, aren't you? Please, Harry, figure it out!

I shouldn't have gone to the library that day...it seems strange that only a week ago I was running around, reading things, and able to speak. It feels like so much longer. I was smart - I took a mirror, in case I saw the Basilisk, but I never thought I'd ever have to actually use it. I heard it through the walls, slithering past me. I was just outside the library.

Justin

God...why me? I know I should be thankful to be alive, but why me? It's just my luck, I suppose. Snakes never liked me - and I returned the favour. That's why Draco's spell tried to attack me first! I swear...they can sense things, like fear. And hate...they know hate better than anything that I've ever seen before.

It was so huge, though, like nothing I've ever seen in my life. I couldn't really see it - thanks to Nick - but what I did see was dreadful. It was so big! And now I'm here...feeling more hate than ever before.

Colin

Wow! Who'd have though - giant snakes! That's amazing - fantastic even! It was like a huge green worm, with really cool eyes...I only wish my film didn't melt - would it be cool if I got the first ever picture of one of those - things? Snakes? I'd be so famous!

Still...I wonder why it did this to me. Or...what happened to me, even. All I did was look at it, and just as I took the picture I felt my eyes burning. They're still burning - it hurts a little bit, and gets really annoying and bad when I try to sleep, but it's definitely worth it!

Nick

Damn! You keep trying to get there, and it never happens! Instead, I'm stuck here again - I bet it's that Justin boy's fault. If he hadn't have spoken to me for so long, he wouldn't have been petrified. I would've left, and everything would have been fine. It would have been perfect!

But once again, I'm stuck here in the school. I really did think it would work - it should have killed me, for once and for all this time. But I'm still a ghost! You know, before it came out, I almost saw it. I felt so close.

Hermione

Nobody else was there...no one hardly ever goes to the library, I was practically there all alone. And then there was the Quidditch game...of course. Everybody went to Quidditch, instead of trying to keep up with their classes at the library. The fact that nobody in this school tries to learn just gives me such a headache! It's not that hard...you just go to the library and read a few books. I'm giving myself another headache now...wonderful. Goodness, my eyes still hurt - I can't believe the pain lasts this long. I just want to run to the sink and wash them out, but I can't.

And why won't they figure it out! Harry...I feel your hand upon mine. Go and hold my other hand, Ron - its right there. I stole a page from the book. Me, Hermione Granger, stealing from the library. It's so unlike me, I know! But it's worth it...I wrote everything you need to know on that page. Just hold my other hand, Ron!

Justin

This is just awful. I can see them...Harry and Ron...just out of the corner of my eye. They visit her all of the time - but they never visited me, not even once. They were the ones that found me, for goodness sakes! But no. She's more important.

Nobody comes to visit me. I was the first one! Well, the first human, at least. God, Mrs. Norris gets more visitors than I do. Still, most of them are just here to make fun of her. I wonder if she can understand them - she always seems to understand Filch. Maybe she can really hear us, and knows exactly what we're saying to her.

Colin

I'm getting very tired. Harry and Ron are here - they're so quiet! You'd think that a big star like Harry Potter would be so much louder, and try to start parties everywhere he goes, like the stars in the normal - well. Muggle World, I mean. It's hard to get used to that, the new words and all.

The magic is also really hard. My parents were so angry when they found out I was a Wizard, being very religious and all. They took me to the church, but a Witch stopped them, saying that nobody could find out. Apparently my brother is also a Wizard - they're not too happy about that, either. But nobody can know except for us. I don't see the big deal - I mean, magic has its downfalls, like right now, but most of it is used for very good things.

Nick

I was right there. I could see the Gates - there was a man staring at me. He told me that I had already made my decision, so many years ago, and that I couldn't change my mind. I thought that being killed again would take me there, but it didn't work.

I hate it here - well, I don't hate it, exactly, but it gets so boring. Every day is exactly the same! I talk to students, I gossip with the portraits, I move through walls. Now I can't do any of those things - except moving through walls, which causes quite the drama when it gets windy around the Hospital Wing. It all gets old, though.

The students only ever talk about classes and Quidditch. The portraits are entertaining, but they're not real people, simply shadows of those who chose to go on. Moving through walls - it's hardly anything to cheer about. It comes in handy when one is in a hurry, but I never am in one of those. I'm just here, and I want to go on.

Hermione

Nobody realizes it, do they? The teachers and Madam Pomfrey - they think that we're asleep somehow, that we don't know what's going on. I think that's because we can't move our eyes. But I can see! I can see everybody who looks at me, feel them as they touch me, hear what they say about me and all of the other patients. I'm sure that the others can do the same. I'm sure that they can think, also.

But we can't move. I'm so hungry...and thirsty. I don't actually need food, nor can I eat it, because the curse shut down my digestion system. Every once in a while Madam Pomfrey will put water in my mouth, to keep my lips from getting dry, but it only makes me sick to feel the water trickling down my motionless throat, and I want to throw it back up. At least I never have to use the washroom though, as the curse also shut down my bladder.

Or at least, that's what they're saying. I've been here for a little over a week, completely still. Sleeping helps to pass the time, but I always wake up to Harry and Ron staring at me. It's terrifying, but they'll never realize that, because I can't jump it or yell out in fear. I've been wondering though...how do they know I'm alive? I guess they have experience with this kind of thing, but I'm pretty sure I haven't a pulse. In fact, I believe that the curse is the only thing that's even keeping my alive for the time being.

Still, I think I'll go to sleep now. Harry and Ron aren't going to find that paper any time soon, and I haven't been able to sleep for a few days, those boys have been here so often. It's funny how I can be completely still, and still become so tired. God my eyes hurt, though.

Justin

I hate that they placed my on my side. I'm in such a weird position for me to put me this way. My hands are in front of me, as I was talking to Nick when it happened. It's so uncomfortable. Even my facial expression is weird. He looked so angry at me, and I must have made a confused face, because when they brought Hermione in, and I saw her mirror, that's how my face looked. Utterly confused.

Harry was the first person to find me. At first I thought it was his fault, but then I realized that it had been something far bigger than he was. It was a giant snake - and I think it must have had something to do with the Chamber of Secrets, because that's all anybody talks about these days. My shoulder really hurts. They didn't place my head down at all, so I'm just sort of lying on my side.

I don't think they realize that I'm not a vegetable at the moment - I'm thinking, loud and clear! To myself, anyway. I'm almost positive that the others are too, but I'll never know. Every once in a while I try to see if I can scream or yell, get some air out of my lungs, but even they are petrified. I guess the teachers have seen the curse before, so they know we're alive, but how can they really be sure?

Colin

What would my parents say? I really wish they could come here...but that would be useless. They can't see Hogwarts, no normal - Muggles - can see this school. I guess that's a good thing - or so they tell me. What's the big deal? Why can't Muggles know about Wizards?

I'm sure there would be controversy, with all of the religious stuff, but I'm also sure that it could be proved that magic does do good things, too! I mean, the Wizards have been trying to save the world for years, and it all has to do with Harry Potter. Would the Muggles hate him too? It's not his fault that he's a Wizard, he was born that way!

So was I, for that matter. They couldn't be angry at me, or my parents. It's just the way I, and all other Witches and Wizards, were born. They wouldn't consider it to be our fault? Besides, if they did hate us for it, what could they do? Wizards have spells for everything!

Nick

I want to go to heaven. Or wherever Wizards go instead of ghost-hood. I should never have chosen to stay in this world - nothing happens to me. Nothing that I do really matters here. I'm just a ghost, and I'm going to stick around forever. I'll never leave a legacy, I'll just always be around. I want to move up, and go where everything really does mean something, where everybody can be together!

I suppose that I just want to matter. I always have, and everybody knows about it. All of the students see it, and all of the portraits try to hide their gossip about me. Not that I really care - the students will all forget sooner or later. In fact, they all just think it's part of my ghostly charm, and the portraits...they don't matter. They are just shadows of people who made the right decision when they died.

I was so mean to that Justin boy. If he wasn't there things would have stayed exactly the same, no matter what. He would be safe, no doubt, but I'd still be here, disappointed by everything not working properly. I really did think that it would work, though!

Oh, goodness! There's a draft again! And I've no way to stop it, as I cannot move an inch!

Hermione

I can't believe I tried to say 'Good Morning,' it's not like my mouth can move. I forget how long I've been here for - I think it's been about two weeks, but I'm starting to lose track of time. Dumbledore was fired, I know that. He was the only one who kept me updated. I think he knows...he always comes in with the date and time. But he can't anymore. Apparently, Hagrid is also gone.

Oh...hello, Harry. I didn't feel - Oh, goodness! I didn't feel your hand! Harry - I'm losing myself...what if it gets worse? This started a few days ago, but what if - my eyes don't burn anymore. Odd. I feel you now, Harry - wait! Yes, that's the right hand!

What are you...you found it! Oh, this is wonderful! Show Ron, Harry - good boy! Everything is going to be fine now! Harry...what did you just say? I'm having trouble hearing you now, Harry! I'm scared.

Justin

I've come to the conclusion that Mrs. Norris can understand English. Trust...I've though about this for a while. It's not like I haven't had much time! Actually, I've sort of turned in Hermione Granger. I've been so worried about catching up to my schoolwork - I wonder if I'll still have to do my end of term exams. Dumbledore is usually pretty lenient with that kind of stuff though, so I won't worry.

I've been worried about other things lately...yesterday, according to my watch, which is rather close to my face, I stopped thinking entirely for about seven hours. I wasn't asleep though - I just stared ahead, not thinking or really seeing anything. I remember that I was thinking about Mrs. Norris, and then...I can't explain it. It's like I had left my body entirely for a while. I'm scared.

The other day Madam Pomfrey commented on all of us looking like dolls, like porcelain dolls. What if that's what we're becoming? I mean, not physically, but mentally. We're becoming what everybody thinks we are, and it's starting to scare me. The Mandrakes should be ready soon, but what if it's too late. Is there a deadline for them?

What if we actually are dying? I've been hungry for so long...weeks. What if all of the pain, all of the thirst and hunger...what if it's all real? I want to move...I need to move. Even just to see a pulse through my skin on my wrist, to see my skin turn red from the tightness of my watch, to sneeze, anything at all! I just need to know that I'm still able to do something with my life, and with my body. I need to know that I still matter!

Do I still matter? Nobody has come to visit me. Alright, a few people came from my house...three weeks ago? But they were just ogling at me, making comments about how fake I looked, how plastic. They tried to feel for my heart beat, and that's when I realized that I didn't have one. I'm completely still everywhere, and yet I feel like I shouldn't be. Up until yesterday, when I blanked out, I've felt completely real.

Colin

It's been so long...I need to get out. I want to see my parents again! Apparently, Harry and Ron got rid of the - what's it called again? Oh well, whatever it was, it's gone now. It was the thing that made this happen to all of us...and it's gone now. Apparently it all had something to do with You-Know-Who, so it's a great thing that it's over now!

Hagrid came in yesterday, talking about the Mandrakes. He says that they're almost ready! But I sort of feel wrong. I can't think properly lately - at all. I've been forgetting things...what they look like, what they smell like. Scent is supposed to be the human body's best - how do I put this? This is so frustrating! I feel like I'm losing my mind - I haven't been able to speak for weeks, I haven't breathed - maybe there's not enough oxygen going to my brain. Is that possible?

I want my mom - I'm only eleven, after all! Please, make the Mandrakes grow faster - can't you just get them from somewhere else? Have somebody - what do you call it? Appear-arate? Just make them bring it! Just...I need to get out of this shell...I want to-

Nick

I wish I was able to sleep. Ghosts don't normally sleep, unless they'd really like to, and all of this stress isn't helping. The other day I floated into the body of one of them...Colin Creevey, I believe his name is. He was thinking for a while, worrying, and then he simply stopped. I remained within him for a while longer, and then I was blown back out my Poppy.

These poor children - at least I know they are still thinking, or were for a time. If only they'd figure out that these kids needs visitors. Hermione always has Ron and Harry nearby, but they never talk. They simply stare at her, thinking she doesn't see them there. Now I'm quite sure that she does - her especially. And they haven't come as often as usual lately. These children are going mad from loneliness.

Colin is visited by his prefect, Percy Weasley every now and then, but not often enough to help him. What he really needs is a parent. Justin is gawked at occasionally, for his curious expression (my fault, I fear), but is never spoken to. At least Percy rambles a bit to Colin. I am seldom visited, but it doesn't bother me. I'll have plenty of time to speak with others when I'm able to move again. Plenty of time.

Now, I'm not sure if the boy, Colin, had gone mad, or whether the curse has been affecting the children, taking away their thoughts. I believe it is a mixture of both being petrified and loneliness. The Mandrakes, unfortunately, have been delayed due to a spout of acne. Dumbledore (who is back now, thank heavens) expects them to be cured within one more week. Let us hope that it's not too late.

Hermione

Where have Harry and Ron been? I forget how long it's been since I've seen them - maybe they were here, and I just didn't notice them. I haven't noticed many things lately, actually. I've been blacking out often, and not from sleep. I haven't slept in days. In fact, I've stopped needing to sleep for a while now - I've hardly been hungry. I just feel...here.

And it frightens me. I'm losing myself more with every day that goes by - I've been blanking out at least three times a day, and for who knows how long. I'm losing myself...I wonder how everybody else is. They've been here for so much longer than I have - what if they're already gone?

The Mandrakes will be ready soon, they have to be. This is just getting to be so horrible - I miss Harry and Ron. Oh - it's Ginny! She's come to visit me. She's talking to me. Thank goodness.

Justin

I'm not me anymore...I feel as if I've been lost. Now I'm here less than I'm blank, and I don't sleep. I don't feel hunger, I don't feel Madam Pomfrey's touch, and I don't hear Dumbledore's words unless I listen very closely. I don't even feel pain in my shoulder anymore.

It's like I really have become a doll. People stare at me, say how strange and unique I am, and ignore me. I'm inanimate in many more ways then one, to both myself and to those around me. How much longer will this be? Am I going to die, Madam Pomfrey? Please...just tell me!

I am, aren't I? Fine...then it doesn't matter. I don't even know if I'll be me when I wake up. Maybe I should just let go...

Colin

I need to go home. Whenever I think, it's all I think about. I just have to get back to my home...take me there, somebody. Please...

I haven't been thinking much. I just can't - it's no longer possible. I feel like I'm falling asleep, but then when I wake up I remember everybody who came into the Hospital Wing. I wish more people would come...I've been forgetting how to speak lately. Why doesn't anybody realize that we're here, we're awake! We need you to talk to us!

Nick

Those idiots! They helped me first? Why me? They should have saved the kids first...they need to move far more than I do, they've been through so much more. Poppy started with me because I was the most difficult, she said. Who cares - I could have waited!

After me, she quickly went to Justin. I suppose she's going in order, hm? Oh well, I'm sure he deserves to go next. It was incredible. When she treated him, his hands simply fell into the bed and his entire body lay perfectly still. Dumbledore rushed to him to check his pulse - he had one. I suppose that she had woken him while he was blank, and he still is right now. She's been feeding him potion to keep him alive. Hopefully, the boy will awaken from his trance soon.

Then she went to Colin - thank goodness. I fear that he needs it the most, he was so worried. Colin had a lot of trouble breathing at first. He woke up taken a very deep breathe, then realizing that he couldn't breath very well at all. He's been hyperventilating ever since, but they were able to contact his parents. That calmed him down quite a bit. Right now he's sitting up in bed, drinking Poppy's potion, staring straight ahead. She is worried to feed them real food because she doesn't want them to get sick. I don't think it matters - they're starving, and their immune systems having even been moving for weeks. They won't get sick, and if they do (from purely mental causes), I'm sure they won't exactly mind.

Finally, she went to Hermione. Hermione reacted similarly to Colin, with quick, shallow breaths. She's been quite blank also, but she at least seems to still have a vague understanding of the human language, something which the two boys seem to have forgotten. Colin is not speaking at all. He needs a hug, some care, anything. He needs a mother...I told Dumbledore about this, and he's been talking to Colin a bit. He needs a woman.

Hermione is the first to leave. It's surprising, because she had many feminine issues, which the boys have not had. Still, they were sorted out within the night, and she is now leaving. I should go also, but I need to find out how the boys are.

A few days have passed. Justin has woken up. I do believe he was ready to die while he was petrified, and has not responded to anything others are saying to him. Hermione came to visit him, and I've been speaking to him often. Both boys need someone to talk to. Justin smiled when Hermione came...I think he felt needed for the first time. He'll be just fine. Colin is speaking, and Dumbledore has given him a new camera. He's been quite happy, and should be released soon.

As for me...I never lost myself. The fact that I am already dead helped that, I'm sure, but it's still wonderful. I've realized in the past few days that perhaps it is a good thing that I chose to stay on earth. I long for heaven, perhaps, but I've helped these children somehow, I know it.

I am glad to have chosen to stay.