Voldie's Tea Party

Voldem...Voldemo...Voldie sat upon his throne, half bored to death. Wormtail had gone about his daily errands: getting the groceries, going to the Laundromat, killing a few spare muggles, nothing new or big. You Know Who's snake-like eyes gazed around the room, landed on a spot on the wall, and instantly lit up. His pale, misshapen cheeks now pink with excitement, he wandered seemingly aimlessly over to a cupboard hidden beautifully in the intricate carvings in the walls, so much that you would barely notice it. He glanced over his shoulders and to the sides to make sure no one was looking and...pulled out a large stuffed pink bunny and a very worn looking doll that was missing one eye.

"Oh, how I've missed you Mr. Bunnykins and Mrs. Cyclops! That buffoon Wormtail keeps nosing around in all of my business. He doesn't need to know about...us."

Setting them lightly on the floor, and humming a little ditty that he made up as he went along, he reached into the cupboard even further back and pulled out little china teacups and a teapot and brushed the dust off of them.

"There, we're all ready!" He said to the dolls-er, Mr. Bunnykins and Mrs. Cyclops. He sat down upon a little plastic chair and laid his right leg atop his left knee.

"What a beautiful day it is for tea, eh Mr. Bunnykins? So how're the wife and kids? Good! Good! Straight A's I expect? Wonderful! And Mrs. Cyclops? How is life treating you? Splendid! What? You want ME to accompany YOU to the Annual Arts and Music Lovers Celebration? I'd LOVE to! I only hope I can get Beethoven's autograph! He's my hero! Oh, I so hope Wormtail doesn't suspect anything when I go out for the evening!"

"Oh, I believe you're too late for that." Wormtail was standing in the doorway, holding a bag of groceries in one arm and a bag of clean, fresh laundry in the other and a very appalled look upon his face.
"THIS is my MASTER?!? The Supreme Ruler of All that is Dark. Oh, and don't forget about the stuffed bunnies! And Mrs. Cyclops, I'm sorry, but he won't be able to attend the Celebration, for the fact that I'm sending him to St. Mungo's!!!"

Voldie looked ashamed. "So, you want to join us then?"
"Of course! Nice to meet you Mr. Bunnykins! And Mrs. Cyclops, I have to say, that dress is ravishing on you!" Wormtail sat Indian-style on the floor in the small circle of toys and men. "So, is there some reason the door just burst open and Harry Potter is standing in it? I mean, I though you told him it was over Voldie!"

"Erm, to tell you the truth Wormtail, I just made that up so I'd have an excuse to get away to see Mr. Bunnykins and Mrs. Cyclops..."
"Oh. What do you want Potter?" Yelled Wormtail, still sitting Indian-style between Mr. Bunnykins and Mrs. Cyclops.

"I have come to avenge my father's dea...er, why are you guys sitting in a circle drinking IMAGINARY TEA with stuffed animals?"

"Oh, that? It's just a..." The Dark Lord gulped, looked Harry squarely in the eyes, and said determinedly, "Do you want to join us?"

"Um...I think I'll pass, thanks..." But he sat down anyways.

At that moment Hermione and Ron burst through the doors.
Hermione ran up to stand right next to Harry, gasping for breath and clutching a stitch in her side. "Harry, we're here to save you! *Gasp* The Dark Lord has brainwashed you! But anyways, you told us to come in if you weren't back in 10 minutes, and it's been almost 30. See, we were having a quick snog while you were in here and decided we'd take a break for a bit to check on you. But you seem to be doing alright, so we'll just leave you alone..."

"Hermione, I told you to call the AMBULANCE if I wasn't out in 10 minutes, and to come in here after me ONLY if it was an emergency!"

Ron looked embarrassed. "Well, the fire truck is on the way..."

Voldemort decided to stop the scuffle that ensued. After all, this was HIS throne room. "Just sit down and have some tea! By the way, this is Mr. Bunnykins and Mrs. Cyclops..."