The Punch Line

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The Punch Line

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"Cute, Tonks. Absolutely adorable."

"Ahh..." I felt myself growl as my hand covered my half-blinded eyes, which had been quite content up until five seconds prior. I moaned lightly, and tugged my cover over my bare ankles. I would have strangled that girl if I hadn't been so tired. "Five more minutes, Mommy. I went to bed really late last night..."

"You came back at the same time that I did, so quit your whining!" Without waiting for some unknown answer, a pair of strong hands began to strip off a vibrant burgundy patchwork quilt that I had a feeling belonged to Percy. The rips in the sides were too neat to be anybody else's.

She yanked again. "It's half past noon! Are you going to sleep the entire day?"

My hands covered my ears, pasting a pained look on my face. "Yes! Do you have a problem with that?"

Her only answer was a rather sharp blow to my bum.

Pushing my face into a dilapidated pillow, I let out another gruff groan. "Haven't I been lazy enough to avoid the entire group?" I inquired, struggling to hold onto the lower portion of the quilt that was rapidly torn away by the short brunette. I jerked a little harder, sending the girl careening to the floor. Ha. I had always been a good one at the gym. "Molly'll have my head for sleeping in anyways...Might as well do a good job of it."

"Yeah, well..." Hermione trailed off, releasing the struggling quilt from her fingers. I curled upward, stretching my arms over my head. Hermione chuckle lightly, and pushed me rearward. I pretended to be flailing before sitting up straight again.

"So... is everybody out?"

Hermione nodded, curly tresses falling freely from her lazy ponytail. "Yeah. They all shoved off about three hours ago. Even Ron and Ginny hopped on over to Diagon Alley with Molly. Something about having a go at Fred and George for using Ginny as an unwitting tester for a new product."

"Wouldn't expect any less from them, mate," I replied, a chortle catching in the back of my throat. "Anywho... expecting them back anytime soon? I don't know about you, but I'm right awful when it comes to anything dealing with kitchens."

"Trust me; I know. Molly has mentioned it more than one time. Something about you being one of the few women with the talent of being able to burn pure water seems to come to mind..."

"Nobody was supposed to know about that!" I replied in protest. "It's a whole lot harder than my father made it look when he was making a cup of tea in the morning!"

"I sympathize not," she answered, eyes rolling. "Anyway..." Hermione took up a seat on the end of the couch as I pushed back, until my back hid the armrest. "I was wondering...would you mind... terribly... if I... spoke with you about something... personal?"

Well. That certainly wasn't expected.

I was the one that Ginny and Hermione went to for entertainment, for a laugh-and-a-half (a term dubbed earlier that summer by Fred and George during a particularly hysterical taste-testing of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans), not the one they came to advice for! Clearing my throat, I suddenly took great interest in the Weasley family room's hiccupping threadbare carpeting. "'Bout what, Hermione?"

"Well, it's... a problem, yes, that's what it is, a problem!" I looked up to see a very flustered look gracing Hermione's skin. "I... well, you're... you're so..."

"Odd?" I interjected, breaking the stony expression from her face like a nail to a piece of graphite. "Sorry. That's just the only non-colorful word Molly's ever used to describe me, and I'm afraid that I'm getting quite attached to it."

She gave me an oddly stealthy look. "You see! You're on top of things, Tonks!"

"You're like that too!" I interjected suddenly, feeling an unnatural blush coat my cheeks. "You're brilliant, mate! Merlin, you know things that I don't even know!"

She spoke softly, eyes now intensely fixed on the carpet. "That's what they all say."

I put a hand on her shoulder. "Hermione... is something... wrong? Has... somebody said something to you?" A fierce protectiveness gripped at my heart. Not having a terribly close family of my own made me all the more defensive of those who I was constantly surrounded by.

"It's one of those things that builds up over time," she replied, inhaling deeply. "You know, I get the third degree daily here from Molly." A wince crossed her face several times over. "She's just so... not who I am."

"You have to understand that Molly's an overtly proud homemaker. She defines herself by that. I mean, she's like that mother you and I saw on muggle television all the time. Annoying and arrogant, unbeknownst to herself."

"I know, I know. It's not that I don't love Molly to death. I see her almost more often than I see my Mum and Dad these days. But..." A long breath. "She makes me feel so bad about myself. And... I know she does that to you too, Tonks. I hear her speaking to you about it all the time."

"What 'it'?"

"Having a proper family. Wanting to give, not get. I hear her talking to you about getting married someday... settling down, finding the right Wizard... I know she's been pushing Remus at you since last summer..."

A heat covered my face. "Yeah, well...Molly thinks if I speak to something and it doesn't jump or bite, it and I are a match made by Merlin himself."

"I know what you mean. If she pushes Ron at me one more time, insisting that she's always wanted a second daughter, I'll hit her."

It seemed that Hermione had finally come to the crucial moment in her tête-à-tête with me, the solitary reason why she had spent ten minutes of speaking in awkwardly structured sentences. Her eyes were big, much larger than I had seen them before, and she was hunched forward on her knees.

"Tonks... do Ron and I behave as if we fancy one another? Because I don't think we do... and I don't want to give Ron the wrong idea is he...you know, does"

Well that's another curve ball.

I took a few moments to consider this proposition. Hermione, to my knowledge, had always acted friendly towards Ron. A very fine femie quality in my opinion. Sure, there were the faithful arguments, and the overbearing concerns on Ron's part, but surely that came from being in a big family...?

I focused directly on her dilated eyes. "I don't reckon so. I never would have been able to put two and two together and equal five."

She sighed lightly, and leaned against the nether part of the couch. "Oh Tonks, it's not that I don't like Ron... but... not right now..." A pained expression crossed her chestnut eyes. "You know, I could learn to like him... like that, I mean. But I just don't presently. And it seems... you know, odd. Molly tells me everyday that I need to go out and get a sensible boyfriend... says I'm going to be an old spinster before I know it..."

I patted her lightly. "Come on, Hermione, you're not really letting yourself get bummed out by Molly Weasley, are you? So what if she thinks every girl needs to be tied before they're twenty? Who cares if she thinks being smarter than all your classmates is not a respectable position for a girl?"

"I know but..."

"But nothing! She's too tense for her own skin. You can't help that you're not attracted to her son, either. Like you said, maybe in due time... All you can do is keep on smiling."

In that moment, I understood why I cared so much. Hermione was so much like me that I was a tad bit frightened. We both knew what we wanted to an unhealthy degree, and our personal lives couldn't interfere. We took the criticism of our lifestyle with a stoic face, but feel the constant pressure of family around us. But we never strived for it.

But we both needed it.

Hermione cleared her throat, content tears dawdling down her cheeks. "You know... you're a fantastic person, Nymphadora Tonks. You actually understand me. And... that makes me so happy. Don't ever change, Tonks. I don't know what I'd do if you did!"

I grinned. "I don't think I'll ever want to. It's much too fun being the punch line, Hermione. I wouldn't have my life any other way. But..." I winced, my hair turned a violent shade of red. "Maybe, just maybe, next time he asks, I wouldn't be so opposed to joining Lupin for a private dinner!"

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