Hogwarts' Next Top Witch

Hogwarts' Next Top Witch

By Mariposa

Chapter 1: The Girl Who Was Almost Sorted Into Hufflepuff

Hermione and Ginny arrived at the lobby of the swank Russell Hotel where they would be living with the other contestants.

"Ginny! Hermione!" They heard a voice call their names the second they walked in. Luna Lovegood was waving to them from a set of plush green couches. They walked over to her and Ginny sat besides Luna and Hermione plopped down in an oversized armchair.

As Ginny and Luna chatted, Hermione looked around. Sitting across a coffee table on a matching couch were Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown. Parvati gave Hermione a small smile, but Lavender just sneered at her, tossed her hair over her shoulder, and continued her conversation with Parvati. Obviously she was still upset Ron had dumped her for Hermione.

Pansy Parkinson was asleep in the other armchair, her mouth open, a slight film of drool oozing down the corner of her mouth. In one corner, Cho Chang was sitting in a chair, her nose buried in a thick hardback book. Romilda Vane was chatting with Susan Bones and Padma Patil next to the check-in desk, Romilda shooting Ginny death glares every now and then.

"This is so exciting!" Luna said to Ginny. "I've never stayed in a Muggle hotel before."

"I imagine most of us haven't," Ginny replied. "Except for Hermione." She grinned at Hermione who nodded.

"It's so nice here," Luna said gazing around the large marble lobby. "Everything is so...spotless."

A tall, black girl with a red weave approached them. "Excuse me, are you Ginny Weasley?" she asked Ginny who nodded.

The older girl smiled, showing perfect teeth. "I figured you were a Weasley with your red hair. Hi, I'm Cyra Dickinson. I was a classmate of Bill's. You could say we were quite close during our last two years."

"Did you guys date?" Ginny asked.

Cyra giggled. "Sort of."

"Are you here for the competition?" Hermione asked.

"I sure am," Cyra smiled. "I'm a judge."

"These are my friends, Hermione Granger and Luna Lovegood," Ginny introduced.

"You're pretty," Luna told Cyra.

"Thanks! I've been doing some modeling for a couple of magazines - Vogue Witch, Spellbinder, Charmour, that kind of thing."

"I thought you looked familiar," said Ginny. "So does Fleur know that you were once, uh, close with my brother? She engaged to Bill, you know."

"I know. And she knows Bill and I had a fling many years ago. She keeps on reminding me of her Veela heritage." Cyra laughed heartily. "But she really seems to love your brother and I'm happy for him. Bill is a great guy. We had some fun times together." She smiled fondly. "Do any of you girls have boyfriends?"

"Hermione is dating my brother, Ron." Ginny grinned.

Hermione blushed.

"The broom shed is a great place to make out," Cyra said.

Hermione blushed again, this time slightly redder.

"Well, I better go before Fleur gets here. She didn't want me meeting any of the contestants until we were properly introduced. Ciao, girls!" Cyra blew them a little kiss and left.

Fleur arrived a few moments later. "Excuse-moi!" she called. "Everyone follow me, s'il vous plait. You know 'oo you are."

The girls followed Fleur into an elevator.

"Is this where we'll be staying?" Lavender asked in awe once the elevator had stopped at the suite on the top floor.

"Eet eese indeed," Fleur said ushering them into the massive penthouse. "Zis weel be your 'ome for ze next five weeks."

"Look at all this Muggle stuff." Luna ran a hand over a shiny black stereo system.

"Now, since we are een a Muggle 'otel, I weel need all of your wands. You weel get zem back when zey are needed for ze competition."

There was a collective grumble as the girls handed their wands to Fleur.

"Everyone geet settled een. Zere are zree rooms. One of zem 'as four beds and ze ozzer two 'ave zree beds. Een ten minutes, I want you in ze room down ze hall so you can meet ze ozzer judges and ze can meet you." With a toss of her shiny blonde hair, Fleur turned and left.

The ten young witches glanced around at each other. Hermione immediately paired up with Ginny and Luna. Lavender, Parvati, and Padma took Romilda under their wing and that left Cho, Pansy, and Susan in the last room.

Ten minutes later they met Fleur and the other two judges in the judging room.

"Allo." Fleur smiled at the contestants who lined up in front of her. "And welcome to 'Ogwarts' Next Top Weetch! I'd like to introduce you to your judges. On my left eese aspiring model, Cyra Dickinson."

"Heeyy!" Cyra waved at the group and gave Ginny and Hermione a small wink.

"And on my right," Fleur continued with a tight smile, "eese Professor Pervin Crunk 'oo used to teach Intimate Relations at 'Ogwarts two years ago."

All the girls gasped in horror, but no one as much as Hermione who still had horrible, horrible nightmares about her fifth year Intimate Relations class. Pervin had a son, Mervin a Slytherin, who was also in the class and not only was he incredibly horny, but he also had the hots for Hermione. Luckily, he was transferred to Pig Snout's Academy, an all wizard's boarding school in Northern England after he was caught filming in the Slytherin girl's bathroom with his WizardCam. As for Professor Crunk, he got the can when he took his students to a club to learn how to pick up "studly wizards and hot witches."

"Hello, sexy ladies." Crunk gave a sleazy grin as though he were a cat in a canary shop.

"What a creep," Hermione heard Lavender whisper to Parvati. "No wonder he was fired!"

"Now I'd like all of you to introduce yourselves," Fleur said to the Hogwarts students. "We'll start weeth you." She nodded at Romilda who stepped forward.

"My name is Romilda Vane and I'm a Gryffindor at Hogwarts. I'll be a fifth year next year - if Hogwarts doesn't close. I'd just like to say how fabulous everyone here is - except for a certain redheaded fugly slutch with the initials G.W."

Ginny rolled her eyes. "I am not fugly!" she retorted. "And I'm also not a slutch."

"What's a slutch?" asked Luna distantly.

"Slutty witch," replied Pansy.

"Oh...that's not nice." Luna frowned.

"Just because I've had three boyfriends in the last two and a half years doesn't mean I'm the Hogwarts Hoochie Mama!" Ginny put her hands on her hips. "And Neville Longbottom doesn't count! I never dated him! We went to the Yule Ball as friends."

"Zank you, Ginny," Fleur said with an annoyed tone. "I zink we've 'ad your introduction. Next!"

Lavender came forward and gave the judges a dazzling smile. "My name is Lavender Brown, Gryffindor, and I don't think there exists a human word to describe how fabulous I am!" She shook her hair. "I'm sorry people hate me because I'm so popular."

"I don't think that's why people hate you," Hermione muttered under her breath. She introduced herself next. "I'm Hermione Granger and I love all the classes I take at Hogwarts except for Divinations which I dropped. I also don't get the appeal of Quidditch."

"I remember you," Pervin said with a leery grin. "You're going to be my future daughter-in-law."

"Eww!" shrieked Hermione. She pushed Cho in front of her.

"Well, I guess I'm next," said Cho. "My name is Cho Chang and -"

"Cho, that's an unusual name," Cyra said with a smile.

"Actually, it's a very common name in Western China," Cho replied snottily. "I graduated at the top of my House, Ravenclaw and I was a Seeker for the Ravenclaw Quidditch team."

"Zank you girls," Fleur said after Luna, Susan, Parvati, Padma, and Pansy had introduced themselves. "Ze competition weel begin tomorrow!"

* * *

The next morning the girls woke up to find a purple envelope propped up on the coffee table. Lavender picked it up, opened it, and pulled out a purple note card.

"What does it say?" Padma asked.

"Seven-Three-One-Eight-Oh," Lavender read. She frowned. "I wonder what that means?"

The girls found out what the mysterious number meant when they met Fleur at Azkaban later that day.

"Some of you may be wondering what ze number I sent you means. Weel, right 'ere een zis cell-" she gestured to the small, empty chamber they were standing before, "eese where Helga Hufflepuff's grandson, Horace Hufflepuff, spent twenty years for being wrongfully accused of being a Deeth Eater before 'e was found innocent and set free. Zat number was 'is cell number. I zink eet eese very important for a top weetch to know about 'er school's 'istory. Zat eese why we are 'ere today. I 'ave ze key. Would anyone like to open ze cell?"

Luna, who was standing near the front and looking in awe, raised her hand. Fleur smiled and handed her the key. As Luna opened the door, Hermione noticed that Susan had a sour look on her face. She soon found out why on the ride back to the hotel.

"Luna, I'm sorry, but I thought it was very rude when you volunteered to open the cell," Susan said.

"Why?" asked Luna. "I don't understand."

"That was a cell of a prominent Hufflepuff, and being the only Hufflepuff here, I thought that I should have opened the door." Susan leaned back in her seat, folder her arms, and pouted.

Cho, who was sitting next to Susan, turned to her and said, "So just because you're the only Hufflepuff among us, that gives you the right to open his cell?"

"Yes!" Susan said brashly. "I have the most emotional connection to Horace Hufflepuff as I am the only Hufflepuff in this competition! I should have opened the cell!"

"I was almost sorted into Hufflepuff," Luna offered. "The Sorting Hat told me I'd be a wonderful asset to that House, but thought I'd be more suited for Ravenclaw."

"What does it really matter who opened the cell?" inquired Hermione. "I mean, we're all Hogwarts students, this isn't about Houses."

"All I'm saying is that -" Susan started to say, but was interrupted by Ginny who was sitting in front of her. "SHUUUUUT UPPPPP!" she screamed at Susan. Growing up with six older brothers, she was quite used at saying those two words.

For the rest of the ride home, nobody spoke about the incident again.

* * *

Their fist task involved taking a test covering the history of Hogwarts. As Fleur put it, "eet eese very important zat 'Ogwarts Next Top Weetch know about ze 'istory of 'er school."

Hermione was thrilled, after all she had memorized Hogwarts: A History. The other girls, however, weren't very excited about taking a one hundred question multiple choice test covering everything there was to know about the school they attended.

The following day was the first elimination and the ten contestants lined up in front of Fleur, Cyra, and Crunk.

"I 'ave ten beautiful weetches een front of me. Nine of you weel be moving on and one of you weel be going 'ome today. We 'ave graded your tests. 'Ermione, congratulations, you 'ave scored ze 'ighest!"

"Surprise, surprise." Pansy muttered as Hermione stepped forward to retrieve her 100% test.

"As ze winner of zis task, 'ere eese a gift certificate to 'Oneydukes at 'Ogsmeade."

Fleur continued handing back tests until Pansy and Susan were the last two standing.

"Weel Pansy and Susan step forward," Fleur requested with a solemn voice. The two girls glanced at each other and took a step. "You two got ze lowest scores on ze test, but one girl did five point better zan ze ozzer...and zat eese Pansy."

Pansy looked relieved as she joined the others who would be moving on to the next round. Susan was crestfallen at being the first one eliminated and shed a fear tears as she hugged everyone good-bye.

Nine girls remain...WHO will be Hogwarts' Next Top Witch?