If In The Beginning

Chapter Six: Prongs

"I wonder what´s taking him so long," said Sirius, pacing nervously around the dormitory. "If he doesn´t hurry up, we won´t make it to the Whomping Willow in time." He lay down on his bed, sighed, and closed his eyes tightly.

James looked over at him and suddenly felt very grateful, to whatever power it was that made him love Lily and made Lily love him back. He wondered how many other people there were, spending their days in all-consuming and unrequited love, hoping and pining and wishing with all their might that one day the object of their devotion might love them back. How may of them never told the other what they felt? The gratefulness for who he was and what he had was so overwhelming that it made him weak and limp, and he had to sit down.

He looked over at Sirius, and suddenly understood why Remus fancied him...or, why he thought Remus fancied him. If you were the type of person who was attracted to men, why wouldn´t you want Sirius? He was smart, gorgeous, kind, the works. No, he didn´t blame Remus one bloody bit. Being gay couldn´t be that different from being straight...after all, he liked that Lily was smart, gorgeous, and kind. It was just that she was a girl and Sirius was a boy. That was the only difference when it came to he and Remus´s attractions.

He heard the door creak, and he looked over to see Remus walk in. Sirius sat up and opened his eyes. All of a sudden, James found the answer to all the questions of the night.

"I hate to do this to you, Moony," he said, "but I think I need to go and spend some time with Lily tonight. We´ve all been so busy studying for exams that I´ve barely seen her lately. You two take the cloak and go over to the willow without me."

He couldn´t read either Sirius or Remus´s expressions. "Don´t worry, Remus, I´ll go down to see you tomorrow night and I´ll bring Peter too. God, I can´t believe he´s actually studying..."

Remus nodded. Solemnly, he picked up the cloak from the table. "Come on Sirius," he said. "If we don´t go now, we won´t get there in time."

Sirius nodded. They left.

James sat back down on the bed, hoping he´d made the right decision. He decided he had; if Remus and Sirius were left alone they could maybe talk about the problems they´d had lately (or maybe do more than talk), and he really should go and see Lily. A thought struck his mind like lightning striking a tree. How many people, James thought, found someone they loved who loved them in return, and lost them?

Frantically, he raced down the stairs, into the common room, up the other stairs, and to the door of Lily´s dormitory. He knocked loudly. Lily answered a second later. "James, why aren´t you with - "

Before she could finish her sentence, James put his arms around her and kissed her hard. It was a long time before either of them said anything again.