You Don't See Me

CHAPTER THIRTEEN: The One That Got Away

I couldn't sleep that night right after dinner. The next thing I knew, I had rushed to Harry's bedroom and knocked on the door.

"Yeah?" came the reply.

"Can I come in? I need to talk to you," I said.

The door swung open, and my breath got caught in my throat. Harry was standing inches away from me, wearing nothing but a faded pair of baggy gray sweatpants.

"Sorry... I was just about to go to bed," Harry said, grabbing a shirt and pulling it over his head as he turned around and talked to me.

"It's okay. Listen," I said, ignoring his comment and opting to look into his probing green eyes. Far less dangerous territory. "I came here to tell you that I'm moving back to the Burrow by tomorrow. I think it's what's best for us right now considering that I was here only to look after Abby while you were gone. And besides, it's not nice for me to be living here when I'm not even related to both of you," I explained.

Harry looked at me, his green eyes sharp. "Tell me if I have this straight," he said slowly. "You want to leave because you're uncomfortable with what my neighbors would think about your relationship with me and my daughter?"

"Well," I hedged, my heart pounding furiously. "It's not like that - "

"Then WHAT?" Harry replied, his voice rising a notch.

"You don't have to shout," I hissed, fearful that Abby might hear us arguing.

He walked over to his desk, randomly shuffling together some papers scattered all over it, but he kept his back to me.

"Harry, I just think that it's not proper for me to be staying here any longer," I explained. "Abby has this notion that I'm going to be her new mother when it's a very remote possibility. I don't want her to be too emotionally attached to me," I continued, watching his expression very closely. "We're both being unfair to the child."

"Then why are you telling me all of this?" he asked, knocking over a paperweight in the process. He turned to me, his arms crossed over his chest. "You should talk to Abby. She's the one whom you owe an explanation."

I felt myself deflate. "Fine. I'm sorry I asked," I replied bitingly. "You're absolutely right. I should be talking to your daughter. My issues don't concern you and it's not like I have the right to ask for anything. Even from a friend - "

I turned around and headed down the hall to the guestroom. Fighting the exhaustion as my emotions jumbled themselves inside me, I fought to prevent myself from crying. I was angry with him for being so insensitive, angry with myself for asking him a stupid question, angry that I ended up looking mental in front of him, and ashamed that I'd lost my cool.

It wasn't until I was halfway across my room that I realized he had followed me.

"I'll talk to Abby first thing tomorrow after she comes home from school," I said. "Don't worry, I'll explain everything - " Shut up, I told myself. You sound like an idiot.

"Ginny..."

Shaking, I started packing my things while I still had enough time.

"Ginny, stop." His voice was completely transformed. Calm. Low. I turned to look at him.

"I - I don't want you to leave... honestly," he said. "And I'm sure Abby shares the same sentiment as well. But if your decision's final... then I'll be there with you... to help explain everything to her."

My eyes widened with disbelief and my heart melted along with my anger. I wanted to ask him why he didn't want me to leave but I opted to save it for next time. I had made up my mind and there was no turning back. If I wouldn't leave now, Abby would grow more and more attached to me and it would be very difficult for her to accept that I'd be going back to New York a few days from now.

"Really?" I asked him.

"Yeah. You have my word," he replied.

As if on impulse, I crossed the room and threw my arms around Harry's neck. "Thanks," I said. Harry squeezed me back for a split second and then moved away.

"We'll miss you here," Harry said.

"Me too," I replied, my heart racing from nervous dread. "But then there's still Mum and Dad's anniversary dinner, remember? Also, you can still visit me at the Burrow anytime before I leave for New York."

Harry's face fell. "You're still going back?"

"Harry, I work there," I reminded him.

"But you're life is here," he reasoned out. "You're a witch, Ginny. You have a heritage to live on."

"My life is in New York now," I explained. "But it doesn't mean I'd forget my family. Not now - especially not now - when everything's okay." His apparent concern was throwing me off, but I was perfectly sure he was speaking in behalf of Ron as well. "I'll still visit them from time to time."

Something in Harry's eyes shifted and he let out a brief sigh. "You want my advice, Weasley?" he said. "Stay. You're much better off here."

****

"NO! YOU'RE LYING, DAD! AUNT GINNY'S NOT LEAVING!" Abby screamed in what appeared to be a tantrum attack right after we told her the news. She was flailing her arms trying to let go of Harry's grip on her as she burst into tears.

"Princess, daddy's telling the truth," Harry explained. Still unsure of what to do with Abby, he turned to me for support.

I approached the little girl hoping I could make her understand. But then she broke free of her father's hold and ran to my embrace.

"Sweetie - "

"Please don't go?" Abby said weepily. "I promise that I'll be a good girl from now on. Please stay?"

"Sweetie - I really want to - but I can't."

"Why not?" she asked. "You're going to be my mum, aren't you?"

"Oh no - sweetie - you got it all wrong," I explained. "Aunt Ginny is just daddy's friend. Mummy is in heaven already - you told me that."

"Mummy left me - " she paused between sobs. "And now you're leaving me too! I hate you! I hate you!" She ran towards her room before Harry and I could say anything else.

"Abby - " I was in near tears and I wanted to hold the kid for the last time to apologize before I left. Harry stopped me.

"Let her be," he said. "She'll come around."

"She'll hate me forever."

"Ginny, she's just a kid - "

"Whom I happen to care about very much - "

"Then don't leave - "

"I have to! I'm not your wife, Harry!"

The last comment left him dumbfounded and I myself didn't know where it came from in the first place. But before he could even comment, I grabbed all my stuff and headed off to the fireplace.

I was taking the floo network going back to the Burrow.

****

"Hermione?" I whispered, silently opening the door to her and Ron's bedroom at the Burrow. "Hermione, wake up." I heard a tiny snore and tiptoed into the dark room. Ron could be asleep as well but I didn't care. I had to talk to my sister-in-law right now. "Hermione!" I stage-whispered.

"What?" Hermione said, still asleep. She rolled over and blinked a few times.

"Hey," I said, nudging Hermione's leg.

"Omigod!" Hermione sat straight up in bed, her hand over her chest.

"Shhh! It's just me!" I whispered.

"Ginny?" she asked. She leaned and grabbed her wand from the nightstand. "Lumos!" I squinted as the sudden brightness pierced my eyes. Hermione squinted back, then looked at the clock on her nightstand. "What are you doing her? You weren't supposed to be back until the weekend."

It was then that I noticed that she was alone in the room. My brother wasn't there. I was on safe territory for some girl-talk confession.

"Ginny, I was asking you a question?" Hermione interrupted my thoughts.

"Huh? Oh, where's Ron?" I asked, purposely straying the topic.

"He's off on some official business for the Ministry in Scotland," she explained. "Representing the Daily Prophet, of course. He'll be back the day after tomorrow."

I plopped down on their soft, queen-sized and shrugged. "In case you're interested, I Apparated back here. Never tried it before, but Harry was kind enough to teach me how."

"Yeah, right," Hermione said with a huge yawn. She kicked at the twisted sheets and comforter, trying to smooth them out. After which she turned and fluffed the pillows behind her.

I laughed. "Actually, I traveled by floo powder."

"Yeah, right," she repeated, propping herself up. "That's even less believable."

"Why not? I'm still a witch after all, remember?" I told her. "Besides I couldn't Apparate because I haven't taken my tests yet."

Hermione smiled and stretched. "Brilliant! And now I'm all comfy, so what are you doing here?"

I took a deep breath. "I did something stupid, and I may have hurt someone's feelings. I need your advice, but you have to promise not to get mad at me," I said.

"This sounds interesting," Hermione said, pushing her hair behind her ears. "Why would I get mad?"

"For I'm acting like a paranoid eleven-year old again," I answered. I pulled my legs up onto the bedspread and sat Indian style, facing Hermione more closely. "This thing that I'm going to tell you... it has been bothering me for quite sometime already."

"Does it have anything to do with a certain Harry Potter?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

My heart skipped, either from surprise or just because I heard his name. "How did you know?" I asked, whacking my sister-in-law's knees.

"Because I'm me," Hermione replied, copying my incredulous tone. "We've been friends for a long time. I saw you grow up and I knew how much you've cared for him all these years. How could you possibly think I didn't know?"

"Am I really that transparent?"

"Very much," she replied. "But wait? Did you just say you were moving back here? Why?"

"Long story," I said.

"Try me - "

"Well, let's see," I started. "First there's the fact that his daughter thinks I'm going to be the mother-she-never-had, second is that I'm too uncomfortable with the whole I'm-living-with-them thing because of the first reason (even if it's only temporary), and last but not the least... Harry doesn't need me. He never did." I flopped onto my back and stared at the ceiling. "I'm a stupid, stupid prat."

"First of all, you're not stupid," Hermione said. She leaned forward, grabbed my wrists, and pulled me back up. I slumped and stared at her. "You're just confused - but admit it - you still like him."

"I've given up chasing after his affections," I told her.

"But it doesn't mean you've stopped caring for him," she explained. "And now that you're being presented with an opportunity to be closer to him once again - you're running away?" Hermione pointed an accusing finger at me.

"I'm not - " I defended myself.

"You are scared, Ginny - scared of the opportunity to love again - all because you're afraid of getting hurt."

"But - "

"Listen to me," she said. "Take the chance this time. At least when you'll reminisce about this in the near future, you'd say that you didn't have any regrets because you were brave enough to try your luck."

I stood up abruptly. "I am not having this conversation - "

"But I thought you wanted my advice?" Hermione asked.

"Well it made me all the more confused."

"Big surprise."

I merely shook my head, stood up and stalked over to the door. "Good night, Hermione," I said, stifling a yawn. "Too sleepy right now to talk some more."

"Very well then, have a rest. And you can expect me to grill you some more by tomorrow," she said.

I clicked the door shut and proceeded to my own room. Sprawled on my own bed, I was overcome by a head rush that made me suddenly very tired. Within a few minutes, I dozed off.

****

Two days after I had left Harry's house, Ron paid him a visit at his office. Contrary to what I had expected, my brother didn't ask any questions on why I had moved back to the Burrow on such short notice. Apparently, he now understood fully well how my mind works and knew that once I set my decision on something, there was no turning back.

"Ron! Come on in, mate," Harry said. "What brings you here?"

"Can't I even see my best mate now? I've only been recently back from Scotland you know?" Ron stepped inside Harry's office.

"Well you came at the right time. I was just finishing this report for the Ministry regarding a new confederation of Wizards in Glasgow." Ron plopped down the weather-beaten leather couch inside Harry's office and let out a long sigh. "How's Ginny?"

"I thought you'd never ask," Ron said. "Funny thing, mate? Nothing has really changed on how the two of you deal with each other - even after seven years."

Harry dropped his quill and leaned back into his chair. "She was the one who insisted on leaving," he reasoned out. "You should've seen Abby's reaction when we told her about it. My daughter's so attached to her."

My brother laughed. It was so obvious that Harry was being his clueless self once again.

"Well, she could always visit her at the Burrow. She still has at least a week before she flies back to New York."

"And you're letting her?"

"Why not? She works there," Ron replied. "And besides, my sister's of age. She can do whatever she wants with her life."

"But her family's here! She's a witch - she can do so much more as an Auror," Harry rambled on but Ron silenced him.

"It's up to her to decide when she wants to move back here permanently. For now, we're all okay with it since we already know where she lives," he replied. "Now wait a minute! Why are we talking about my sister? I came here so that you and I could go out for a drink."

Harry laughed and stood up. "Butterbeer?"

Ron laughed as well. "Firewhisky would be more like it. C'mon, there's this great place at Hogsmeade that just opened recently," Ron suggested as he walked towards the door. "Longfellow's. Really nice pub if I must say."

"I'm in," Harry replied, following Ron to the door. "But - "

"Don't worry about Abby," Ron said, as if sensing Harry's thoughts. "Hermione's already taken care of that. She'll be at the Burrow together with the rest of the kids."

"Looks like I have no choice," Harry said. "Here's to an entirely all-guys night-out."

Ron took it as a good sign. "May it be the first of many."

****

Fortunately for me, Abby had regained her good mood the next time we saw each other at the Burrow. She was just a kid after all and mood swings were as frequent as night and day. But I completely understood where her resentment came from. Perhaps I would've acted the same way if I grew up all these years without knowing my mother at all.

"The whole house is a riot lately. Val's been having the time of her life leading the other kids around," Hermione told me during our after-dinner chat that night. "She loves being the oldest."

"Don't you think Abby resents the fact that she's not the leader anymore ever since Val and Gabriel arrived?" I asked. Gabriel was Charlie and Erin's son who was a year younger than Valerie.

"Nah, she adores the two. Besides, she used to hang around with them before the twins were born."

"Really? Too bad I missed those years - "

CRACK! It was then followed by a loud crash.

"Sorry for the vase!" a voice called out from the fireplace.

I recognized the voice distinctly and followed Hermione as we checked out the new arrival... or as it turned out to be - arrivals.

"RON!" Hermione shrieked, obviously shocked by her husband's appearance. My brother looked as if he had too much a drink of Firewhisky. What's worse... he wasn't alone in his drinking spree.

"Harry?" I said, noticing the other figure sprawled on the couch beside Ron.

"Found them both barely struggling to Disapparate from Longfellow's at Hogsmeade," the third person said. And when she saw me, she broke into a smile. "Well, well, well - how's my favorite Weasley?"

"Hello Tonks," I replied, giving her a hug. "I suppose Remus must've filled you in on my return?"

"Precisely," she said, her eyes twinkling. "Remus just couldn't keep his mouth shut whenever it concerned something about his favorite couple in the world."

I glared at her wondering what she meant but Tonks quickly realized her mistake.

"Oops! Sorry, just don't mind what I said. I tend to blabber too much sometimes." She gave me a hug as well and then turned towards the two gentlemen again.

"Thanks for bringing them back, Tonks," Hermione said, trying to help Ron to his feet. "Oh Ronald - what in Merlin's name drove you to this insanity - better hope the children won't see you - or else - you'll have an earful from me when you're sober enough!" she lectured my brother as she led him upstairs.

"My pleasure!" Tonks called out. She was her usual bubbly self as ever, and being a metamorphmagi - she never lost her penchant for constant reinvention. At that moment she sported a Mohawk hairstyle to match her magenta colored hair.

"Can you help me with Harry over here?" I asked, gesturing over to the spot where Harry laid unconscious.

"Sorry dear, Ministry business first," she reasoned out. "I have to rush now. I'm still meeting a couple of Aurors for a very important assignment."

"But - "

With a popping sound, Tonks had disappeared and I was once again left alone to deal with Harry.

"Really stupid act on your part, Potter," I told him. (He was unconscious though but I found it fun to be lecturing him while he was in that state) "Had too much a shot of Firewhisky? You don't even drink!" He was a tad too heavy and it took me a few minutes before I could hoist his limp form over my shoulder. I wondered how Hermione had managed to assist my brother upstairs without so much of an effort.

Since most of the rooms at the house were full because of the arrival of my brothers, I had no choice but to bring Harry to my room. I would just have to sleep with the kids after I get Harry settled down for the night. We quietly set off along the narrow hallway and up the rickety staircase that zigzagged through the house to my room at the third landing.

By some unfortunate coincidence, we bumped into George when we were just inches away from my room.

"Oi, Ginny! What happened to that?" he nodded at Harry's figure.

"Drunk of course. He's not the only one, though," I said. "Ron's in the same state. Hermione's tending to him right now."

"You're not planning on sleeping in the same room as him, are you?" George teased.

"Of course not!" I reasoned out. "Honestly George, I'm not as twisted as you are. Now would you mind helping me here? My shoulders are aching already."

"Whatever you say, Madame Ginny," George answered, doing a curtsy. (He was trying to be funny actually)

"And don't go blabbing to Fred about this, okay?" I warned him.

"Your secret is safe with me, little sister," George replied, his eyes twinkling.

"I'm sleeping at the kids' room, okay?"

"Whatever you say - "

"George!"

"Only kidding - "

As I turned the lights off to leave a few minutes later, I couldn't help but wonder why things are happening the way they are right now. Even though I swore to avoid Harry at all costs when I first returned, here I am spending almost every minute of my vacation with him.

"Good night, Mr. Potter," I whispered, clicking the door shut.

(To Be Continued...)