Harry Potter: The Sorcerer's Stoned

It wasn't long before the Hogwarts Express arrived at Hogsmeade Station. Harry groaned, annoyed at being interrupted in retelling how he had done a perfect 360 double flip on his broom, while Hermione and Ron sighed with relief. Harry may be great on a broom, but his stories were only cool for the first ten times he told them.

They walked out (actually, Harry walked out looking dark and mysterious, Hermione walked out bumping into people with eyes wide open reading a book, and Ron walked out bumping into people for no particular reason) and made their way to a carriage near the back of the line to get up to the school. Due to the amount of students taking the carriages, they were forced to share with Ginny and Cho. Ginny got up close and personal to Harry, practically sitting on his lap, while he tried furiously not to turn red and keep Cho from being angry with him. Hermione and Ron watched with amusement at his predicament and Ron finally said, "Gin, get off his lap or I'll write to Mum." Ginny gave him an evil look and hopped over to squeeze in between her brother and Hermione.

Harry, not losing a step, winked at Cho and said, "Space is free," then patted his lap. She gave an indignant huff and turned to stare out the window. Ron and Hermione stifled their laughter while Harry just shrugged and mouthed, "Maybe next time."

After a long, bumpy ride (which Ginny was quick to point out) they made it up to the school for the Sorting Ceremony. Ginny veered off to sit next to Collin Creevey and Harry, Ron, and Hermione went to their usual spot at the Gryffindor table. Before going, though, Harry whispered something to Cho which made her give him an odd look and walk to the Ravenclaw table. "What'd you say?" Hermione asked, perplexed at the look Cho had given him. "Just reminded her she missed out on a long, bumpy ride on my lap." Hermione gave him an odd look to match Cho's and said, "Harry, that's sick."

They sat down at the table and waited patiently through the sorting ceremony. Harry sat their thinking about Cho and quidditch while Ron gazed off into space. Hermione was, of course, reading.

It was just after the sorting ceremony was over that Ron grinned and said, "Haha, long, bumpy ride . That's great." Hermione shook her head, realizing just how slow he really was. They decided to ignore Ron's thickness for a while and ate the feast, catching up with their fellow classmates. Well, catching up with all of them except Parvati and Seamus who had eaten as quickly as possible and snuck out of the Great Hall to find another dark corner.

At the end of the feast, Dumbledore stood up and importantly cleared his throat. Everyone looked up at him, expecting a great speech. It was then that Dumbledore jumped onto the staff table where he was suddenly in baggy jeans and a t-shirt with a Fender guitar in hand. (a/n: Lucky Dumbledore, I want a Fender) His long white hair was suddenly short and spiky and dyed random colors. He started playing a really cool rock guitar intro and then broke into song.

"Load up your wands and books and pens,
It's time to learn magic again,
You won't get bored, of that I'm sure,
Unless Binns is teaching first."

There was a pause as he looked around, gaging the expressions on the faces of all his students and then he began to play again.

"Please keep out of the forest,
It's forbidden, that's for the best,
Some things are banned by Mr. Filch,
Check the list, it's far from zilch."

He cleared his throat again, and somehow ended up back behind the table in his old robes, without the guitar, and long, white hair. He took a long look around the room, smiled, and said, "Welcome back students. You're all dismissed to your dorms." The students, in a wave of shock and awe, left the room with dazed looks.

Dumbledore grinned at Professor McGonagall as she walked up and said, "Albus, did you have to?" He nodded fervently, and said, "At least I left out the part about you during that time of the..."

~*~part 2~*~

The next morning Hermione got up and went down to the common room to wait for Harry and Ron. It usually took a while for the other boys in the room to get them out of bed since neither of them happened to be a morning person. They eventually came down, both looking dead on their feet, and joined Hermione to go to the Great Hall.

Once there, they sat down for breakfast. Hermione ate quietly, thinking about something, while Harry and Ron chatted about Quidditch tricks. Or rather, Harry talked about Quidditch tricks while Ron nodded and smiled. That's what Ron does, right? (a/n: *grins* I love that line)

Hermione barely gave them enough time to eat before rounding them up to go to the first class of the day. Since it was Transfiguration and Hermione's favorite class, they arrived at least five minutes before everyone else. Much to Harry and Ron's dismay, that also meant they arrived five minutes before Professor McGonagall so they had to wait for her to arrive and unlock the classroom door. Meanwhile, they stood there talking about random things.

"Do you think we'll end up with homework on the first night?" Harry asked, fearing he already knew the answer. Hermione nodded while Ron clutched his head in misery. "I hate Transfiguration!" he moaned. It was just then that McGonagall turned the corner and came to unlock the door.

"What was that Mr. Weasley?" she asked sternly. His eyes went wide and his mouth fell open, so Hermione covered for him. "We were just discussing how great it is to be back in your class, Professor," she said sweetly. McGonagall beamed at her favorite student and let them into the classroom.

It was a good ten minutes later when the rest of the class entered and McGonagall started the lesson. They were discussing the uses of inter-species Transfiguration when Ron grinned and then started laughing hysterically. McGonagall chose to ignore this fact, since she was quite sure the poor boy would go mad if she said anything. Finally the dreaded class ended and the Stoned Crusaders gathered in a small group outside of the classroom.

"Ron, why on earth were you laughing like that?" Hermione asked with a concerned look on her face. Harry nodded, except he grinned, hoping it was something they could all laugh at. "Well..." he said, grinning again.

"Yes?" Hermione asked politely. "Get the f#*% on with it," Harry said, still grinning. Hermione momentarily glared at him then turned back to Ron. He gave them a triumphant look and said...

"Dumbledore had a guitar! And he was dressed like a punk rocker! AND HE SANG!" Ron started up with the mad laughing again while Hermione smacked her forehead in frustration and Harry just shook his head.

"He needs a girlfriend," Harry said simply.

Hermione gave Harry a confused look and said, "What does that have to do with anything?" Harry walked away, muttering something about lack of sex having an effect on the male brain, and dragged Ron off with him. Hermione took her turn to shake her head. "Men," she said simply, and followed after them.