Apology For the Devil

Chapter Two--On My Own

The other day I... uh, no, that wasn't me.
[Stephen Wright]

Don't take life too seriously, you won't get out alive.
[anon]

####

Lucius loved Diagon Alley. It was always busy and filled with people he'd never seen before. The Saturday he went to get his supplies was the last day of July, and Lucius was ecstatic that only a month remained before he would be off to Hogwarts.

'I'm going to get robes,' he told his parents decisively after consulting his packing list. His mother had told him that this was his shopping trip, and he was in control. They, of course, would be paying for everything and would refuse any unreasonable purchase, but Lucius got to decide where they went.

'Should I have Madam Malkin put them on the account?'

His mother nodded. 'We'll meet you at Flourish and Blotts in an hour; does that give you enough time?'

Lucius nodded quickly and bounded off to make his purchases. It was the first time his parents had let him wander the alley alone and the thrill of it was only slightly marred by a small worry that something unexpected would happen.

But it was only a small worry. The day was too wonderful to be ruined by worries.

As he walked down the street, Lucius soaked in the energy of the people bustling around him. He loved crowds. As he started for the robe shop, he saw the apothecary on his left, and thought that it would be much more efficient to get his potions supplies before getting his robes. His mother always talked about 'efficiency,' the idea of getting things done with a minimum of fuss. So he changed his plans, and went into the apothecary.

He was a bit nervous to enter the shop alone because he really didn't know what he needed. He had a feeling he was supposed to tell them that he was going to Hogwarts, and that they'd probably take care of it, but a small voice kept nagging that he might need to know more than that. Packing list in hand, he took a breath and walked into the shop.

The stench nearly overpowered him. He'd known that a lot of ingredients were rather foul, but hadn't considered that packing them all into a confined space would be this...unpleasant. He asked the craggy old man behind the counter for help in finding the first-year supplies. The apothecary smirked at him before handing him a pre-packaged set that was complete with everything he needed. Which was well and good, in Lucius' opinion; he wanted to get out of the stinky store as soon as he could. He paid, and did his best to not bolt for the door.

When he got outside, he took a deep breath of blessedly clean air, and moved down the Alley to Madam Malkin's. Thankfully, the potions supplies he'd bought didn't smell too bad on their own. That would be embarrassing.

He'd been to the robe shop many times before, and knew that at least there would be no surprises here.

As soon as he opened the door, a stout witch bustled over to him. 'Ah! Mister Malfoy, here for your Hogwarts robes, I presume?' He nodded yes, but before he could do more than that, she was talking again. 'I knew you'd be in soon, we get a list every year, and your name was on it, and I know your parents do business with us so I assumed you'd be coming in here to get fitted. Step right over here, dear, and we'll get you all sorted out. Come on then, love, up on the platform!' Lucius had no chance to get a word in edgewise over the babble of the woman, and so he stepped where she asked him to without a word.

Lucius hated being fitted for robes. He disliked having to stand still for so long, and having a woman simpering about him over what shades would look good on him bored him to tears. Fortunately, the robes he needed were all supposed to be one colour--black. So he listened to her nattering about her daughter instead, who was nineteen years old, and certain to take over the shop, and my, wasn't she a nice-looking girl. Lucius bit back impatient retorts at least six times before she was done fitting him. He thanked her with a forced smile, and went back outside to the alley.

Flourish and Blotts was conveniently next door. As Lucius was opening the door to the bookstore he was nearly trampled by a boy resembling a gorilla who racing in the opposite direction.

'Watch it!' Lucius cried. The boy stood up, looking sheepish.

'Everett!' a woman called, and the gorilla-boy hurried to her side. As Lucius continued on his way, he could hear her berating the boy. 'Everett Goyle, you look where you're going! You could have hurt someone!'

The voice trailed off as Lucius entered the bookshop. He asked a clerk for help finding his schoolbooks, but decided to find them on his own when the harried man pushed him aside muttering something quite rude. Lucius sighed, and went to find them one by one. He looked at his list. The first book was 'Standard Book of Spells (Grade One),' so Lucius wandered to a likely looking section entitled 'Reference: Charms.'

He had found all but one of his first-year books when his shopping was interrupted.

'Are you finding everything?'

'Yes, thank you,' he replied, assuming it to be a store clerk.

'Lucius?' He looked up. His father was standing there, mother at his side. His father's lip was curled in amusement. Lucius gulped.

'Yes, father. Nearly. I've got one book to go.' He consulted his list. 'Magical Theory, by Adalbert Waffling.' His father held the book out to him, with a smile. Lucius looked at the title, and it was the one he'd been looking for. Lucius would always wonder how his father was able to do that.

'I've already paid for your books,' his father added.

They purchased the rest of his supplies together. His parents began walking back to the Leaky Cauldron and the Floo grate that would return them home.

Lucius looked wistfully back at Diagon Alley. He didn't want to say it, but he'd been hoping that his parents would get him an animal. He really wanted an owl, but even a cat would have made him happy. He dutifully followed after his parents, trying and failing to think of something to say that would convince them to buy him one.

It never occurred to him to ask them outright.

###

In the next month, his father turned away from the less savory spells, opting instead to work on spells that Lucius could use at school without being expelled. Abraxas taught him Furnunculus, Incendio, the Jelly Legs Jinx, Petrificus Totalus, Serpensortia, Tarantallegra, Locomotor Mortis, and dozens of other childhood spells that could be cast on the unsuspecting classmate. Lucius learned them all, though some proved more difficult than others.

'Serpensortia!' Lucius cried, pointing his wand at his father who had just spent ten minutes explaining the wand motion.

A small garter snake fell out, looked around in confusion, and wriggled away.

How embarrassing.

But after Abraxas worked with him for another half hour, Lucius was producing venomous snakes without a problem. Brilliant.

Once he'd learned to perform the spells, Abraxas taught him the countercurses, which Lucius supposed was a good idea, though they weren't nearly as glamorous as the picture of him hexing a bullying Gryffindor.

But after ten minutes of that lesson, and five minutes of wobbling around the room after a powerful Jelly Legs, Lucius realized how vital countercurses were.

They also practiced Lucius' silencing spells, though he already knew them quite well. He'd always taken pride in his silencing spells; he knew that the spell was OWL standard.

Finally, Abraxas taught Lucius a ward against eavesdropping. It took the better part of a month for Lucius to learn, as it was magic quite a bit above his normal level. But once he learned it, he felt a thrill knowing that he could do whatever he liked and no one would be able to hear him.

As September first approached, Lucius could barely contain his excitement. He was finally going to Hogwarts. He'd heard too much about it to not be excited. He learned as much as he could about the school, Slytherin in particular.

The night before Lucius was to leave, his parents called him to the parlor to give their farewells. He would be taken to the train by a hired man; his parents had other affairs to tend to. This wasn't a disappointment to Lucius; his parents were busy people, and it wasn't unusual for them to relegate such a menial task to a hired helper.

He went to meet them with some trepidation, though. This was the last time he'd see his parents for several months, and he'd never been away from them for even a week at a time. They had always been a constant in his life. Without them, there would be no one to fix any blunders he made at school. He would be on his own. It was more than a little frightening.

When he entered the room, his mother and father were seated on a couch by the fireplace. On the table were three boxes; a small, a medium and a large flat one. He wondered what they could be, and secretly hoped that they might be for him.

'Lucius,' his mother spoke warmly, 'your father and I wanted to give these to you before you left for school. They'll help you to--well, you'll see. Go on, open them.' Lucius reached tentatively for the smallest of the three boxes. As he undid the ribbon, he looked up at his parents, who were beaming at him like he'd never seen before. He opened the box.

An ivory fang lay inside, its curve offsetting the square sides of the box. It was attached by a silver fastener to a green ribbon. It was meant to be worn tied around his neck, he could tell. He gently removed it from the box, letting the firelight flicker against the white and green. He looked to his parents for explanation.

'Protection,' his father answered the unspoken question. 'Not against everything, and not to be used instead of caution, but enough to keep you from serious harm. It should go without saying that your mother and I wish to see you safe.' It also didn't need to be said that charms of this sort were invariably complex and expensive. Lucius fastened it around his neck, and tucked it into the front of his robes.

'Thank you,' he said meaningfully. His mother handed him the second box.

Inside this one, Lucius found a cube, about ten centimeters on each side, covered in what appeared to be buttons. His mother explained this one.

'It's a Hide-Away,' she began. 'Each one of the buttons will open the box so you can put something inside of it. But each button opens the box differently, so you can store different things under each button. Only you will know which button corresponds to which object, so it also works as a way to hide things you don't want others to find.' She smiled.

'Some of the compartments,' his father added, 'already contain things. Books, mostly. You should continue your studies while you're at school.' Lucius didn't have to ask what he meant by 'studies.'

'The same rules we discussed still apply,' his father added, noting Lucius' nod.

So he'd have to find a way to hide his training from the other students. Lucius had an urge to start opening compartments then and there, but realized his parents were anxiously waiting for him to open the largest box. A bit reluctantly, he set down the Hide-Away, and went to his last gift.

He gasped as he removed the lid of the box. Inside was a crystalline plate, surrounded by an ornate silver frame. It was about the size and shape of a wall mirror, though its surface was cloudy rather than reflective. He ran his fingers over the frame, and brushed them across the smooth, foggy surface. 'It's beautiful,' he said softly.

'It will connect you to us,' his father said sincerely. 'We have one in our room. If you ever need to talk with us, send us an owl to arrange a time to talk. Yours is a receiving unit, so your mother or I must initiate the call. But we will be here for you, son.' Lucius would have expected his father to grab him into a tight embrace, if he hadn't known Abraxas so well. Tears were forming in his mother's eyes.

'We love you, Lucius,' she said, 'If you need us, call. We want to help you.'

'Thank you,' he said again, feeling the words too paltry to express to his parents how much their gifts, love, and honesty meant to him. 'Thank you for the lovely gifts.'

His mother rose, and approached him. She pulled him close to her and stroked his hair. 'Goodbye, my baby,' she said. 'I'm sure you'll love school.' She released him, and left the room. Lucius and Abraxas were alone. There was a long pause that Lucius wasn't sure how to fill.

'Are you nervous?' his father asked suddenly.

'I--'Lucius began, before reconsidering. 'Yes,' he finished, plainly. His father nodded.

'That's fine. Will you be nervous tomorrow? On the train?'

'Yes,' Lucius said levelly, 'I expect so. But I won't let anyone else know it.' Lucius felt his father's eyes take him in, appraising him. He fought the urge to try to stand taller, straighter. After awhile his father rose and opened his mouth to speak. Lucius could have sworn that Abraxas had meant to say something else, but his father's words were level and soft; the most intentional of phrases.

'Goodnight, son,' he said finally. 'Sleep well.'

He left the room. Lucius was on his own.

--

He arrived at the train station the next day, being let off by a wizard who worked for his father. Lucius ignored the man as he boarded the train and went to find a compartment.

Before he could find one, someone bumped into him from behind, knocking him into the wall of the corridor.

'Watch it!' he said, turning around. Behind him was the boy who had nearly run him down in Diagon Alley. Lucius smirked. 'You do have a way of running into me, don't you?' The other boy looked wholly embarrassed.

'Sorry. I need to find a seat.'

Lucius looked the other boy over. He was tall, thick, and had short cut brown hair. He felt sort of bad for having snapped at him. 'Come on,' he said. 'Let's go look for a compartment together.'

They looked through the compartments, and found one that was empty save for one boy who looked the same age.

'Do you mind if we sit here?' he asked the boy, who was leaning against the far wall and looking out the window. As he heard Lucius, he looked up and shook his head.

'Don't mind at all. Is it your first year too?' he asked.

'Yes,' Lucius responded, as he and Goyle sat opposite the other occupant. 'My name's Lucius. Lucius Malfoy.' If the other boy was impressed by the name, he didn't express it.

'I'm Cato Lee,' he said, 'it's nice to meet you.' He looked questioningly at the other boy, who said nothing for a moment, before realizing that he was expected to introduce himself.

'Goyle,' he said, and then, almost as an afterthought, 'Everett.'

'Nice to meet you both,' Cato said.

'You too,' Lucius smiled. 'Do you know what house you'll be in?'

'Probably Ravenclaw,' responded the other. 'My parents were both there, and it fits me pretty well too. How about you?'

'Slytherin,' he blurted. 'My family's been there for ages.' Cato nodded as if he was thinking. 'What?' Lucius asked.

'I've heard some...things about Slytherin.'

'What sort of things?' Lucius asked indignantly.

'Just that they aren't very nice.'

'Do you think I'm not nice?' he asked the other boy, who was prevented from answering by another first-year walking in.

'Hi, can I sit here?' the new arrival asked in a self-assured tone. Lucius, who was slightly annoyed that he'd been interrupted, surveyed the new arrival. He was small, and the corners of his mouth were turned up into the beginnings of a smile.

He didn't wait for a response before sitting down opposite Lucius. 'I'm Cassidy Keefe,' he introduced himself.

Lucius glared into Cassidy's bright blue eyes. 'Lucius Malfoy,' he said tightly. 'We were in the middle of a conversation.'

'Oh, sorry about that,' Cassidy said flippantly, 'Don't mind me.'

'It's a bit late for that,' Lucius finished.

'Where do you think you'll be sorted, Cassidy?' Cato Lee stepped in to diffuse the tension.

'I dunno...my dad was in Gryffindor, but I suppose we'll see.' He either ignored or didn't notice Lucius' sneer at the name of his rival house. 'My parents both think I'll make Gryffindor.' He shrugged, 'It doesn't really matter to me that much. I just hope I don't get Hufflepuff.'

Cato looked indignant. 'What's wrong with Hufflepuff?' he asked.

Lucius snickered, 'Well, they're the leftovers, aren't they? No ambition, brains or courage. I'd die.'

Cato held his tongue, and quickly changed the subject again. 'Have either of you looked at our course books yet? I can't wait to start classes.'

Cassidy looked towards Lucius, and nodded towards Cato. 'Ravenclaw?' he asked. Lucius nodded.

'Right in one.'

--

Next came a short, awe-inspiring boat ride, during which Lucius tried his best not to look transfixed, though even he admitted he didn't do a very good job. They pulled into a cove and the new first-years were taken into the castle by the giant of a man who had led them there. He'd introduced himself as Hagrid, which Lucius thought was a rather ridiculous name, especially for such a ridiculous looking man. Hagrid handed them over to a flustered looking blonde woman, who had just come down the stairs.

'Good evening, new first-years!' she said to them as she smiled widely. 'I am Professor Yarrow, and I teach Herbology here at Hogwarts. Let me be the first to welcome you to the castle, your home-away-from-home for the next seven years.' She beamed at them, and Lucius found himself oddly comforted by her bubbly yet authoritative nature. 'Now, we're going to go up the stairs, and into the Great Hall. I'll walk you to the front of the room, and from there you just wait until I call your name. Then you'll be sorted into one of our four houses.

'Your house will be much like your family here; you will live together, attend classes together, eat together, and many of the lifelong friends you make will be from your house.' She smiled at them. 'So let me explain the houses a bit before we go in, so you'll be able to follow what goes on.'

Lucius rolled his eyes. He'd done his research, he hardly needed the lecture. Instead, he looked around at his fellow first-years. He saw a dark-haired girl giggling with the boy next to her, who looked half flattered, half annoyed that he was missing the talk that Yarrow was giving. The next person to draw Lucius' attention was a small blond boy standing off to the side. He was smoothing his robes, checking to be sure his hair was lying flat, and trying to turn his nervous look into one that was convincingly unconcerned. He was failing, thus far, but Lucius did get some enjoyment at watching the poor boy try.

Before he knew it, they were being led into the Great Hall. They entered the hall through the grand oak doors carved with the school crest, and found themselves in a long, large room with gorgeous stained glass windows that reflected the light from the floating candles. Professor Yarrow led them to the front of the room. He caught sight of Cato, who was at the front of the line of first-years. Lucius desperately hoped that Cato would be in his house; he seemed like a really decent guy. Behind him, he could hear Goyle's heavy footsteps. Everett seemed to have decided that following Lucius was as good an idea as any, and refused to leave his side. It was fine with Lucius, who was glad to have someone he knew, however vaguely, in the sea of people.

As he looked ahead to their destination, Lucius' gaze was captivated by the shabby old hat that was sitting on the stool. His father had told him that a hat would do the sorting, but Lucius found it difficult to believe that this hat was the hat. He was filled with a mixture of incredulity and disgust. That tattered thing was going to sort the students apart? If he'd had any choice he wouldn't have touched it, let alone put it on his head.

Then the hat began to sing.

Lucius was appalled. A singing hat? Ridiculous. He tried to ignore the hat's stupid song, which was explaining the four houses again.

Instead, he looked around at what was going on in the rest of the Great Hall. He could clearly pick out the Slytherin table, and a thrill of excitement shot through him when he realized that some of his future best friends could be found over there. He was going to make Slytherin. He looked at the other first-years, seeing them with new eyes. A quarter of them would be in his house. For the next seven years. It seemed like an eternity.

The sorting began. Aiken Abbot was made a Hufflepuff. Lucius felt himself smirk, but his condescension towards Abbot was soon replaced by a welling panic. What if, somehow, the ragged hat made a mistake? What if he was put into Hufflepuff? Seven years with those.... He forced himself not to think about it. He concentrated, instead, on appearing self-assured. Of course he would make Slytherin. He was Malfoy.

Val Ballinger became the first new Slytherin. She tossed the hat back onto the stool carelessly, and then strutted over to the Slytherin table. Lucius stood waiting, and registered Cato being sorted into Ravenclaw. A shame, Lucius mused. Not that it was unexpected.

Time stood still for Lucius. Everyone was approaching the sorting so casually, almost as if it were some sort of a game. Even those who were nervous never gave a second thought, at least not that Lucius could see, after being sorted. Was he the only one who realized how vital this decision was? The next ten minutes could determine the course of his entire life, and they were treating it like a perfunctory exercise!

He was jolted out of his thoughts by laughter, and for one irrational moment, thought that they were laughing at him for taking the moment so seriously. He quickly realized that it was directed at the girl whose name had just been called. She was standing with a petrified expression on her face as she was called to the front, and it took a gentle push from Yarrow to get her to try the hat on. It proclaimed her a Gryffindor, to top it off, earning more laughter from the Slytherin table especially. Lucius joined in, sneering maliciously.

'Lockhart, Gilderoy,' Yarrow read out. The boy who stepped to try it on was the small blonde boy Lucius had seen in the entrance hall. He put the hat on, and after sitting for a bit, was also directed to Gryffindor. He brought out the nervous smile he'd been trying to adjust earlier, but didn't come close to the confidence he was trying to project. Lucius' gaze followed Lockhart as he went to sit at the Gryffindor table.

And then it was his turn. Banishing all thoughts of badger-dom, he took a soft but calm breath to steady himself, and then walked to the stool with as much poise as he could muster.

The hat slid on to his head. As soon as it touched, he could hear it analyzing him. He could have sworn it let out a guffaw as it began, almost as if to say 'you want me to sort this?' A voice spoke in his head.

'Is there really any option? SLYTHERIN!' It called the last word out to the hall, and, relieved, more so than he would have ever admitted, he removed the hat and glided to his table.

He looked for a seat along the benches that lined the Slytherin table, and saw a section that was essentially empty. Probably set aside for the first-years, he thought detachedly. He sat on the far end of the section, next to a girl who looked to be about a third-year, and across from Val Ballinger. He waited to see who else might be in his house.

He watched the rest of the sorting in a daze, as Emalia Marbury was made a Slytherin directly after him. Finally, the hat sorted Meghan Wells into Ravenclaw, and Lucius' first evening as a Slytherin began.