Through the Eyes of an Elf

Dinner, could there possibly be anything better? Quite frankly - I think not. What could be better than feeding wonderful food to people whom you have pledged your life to? For me, nothing can compare with dinner. Unfortunately since there has been an increase in "allergy attacks" we can no longer provide such a wide range of food anymore. It is a tragedy, I say.

Tragedy...oh something tragic happened...I lost my bet! I'm out of the loop on the relationship I would have confidently staked my career as a respectable house elf on. She, Miss Ginny Weasley, did not; I repeat did not break up, call for a break or even pretend to be tired towards Mr. Harry Potter. She did the exact opposite! She cuddled with him and murmured sweet nothings into his ear. I was sure she would go straight to Mr. Draco Malfoy when she realized she was in love with him. Oh, on the bright side of this miserable situation, I no longer have ginger snaps in my biscuit tin. I'm not particularly fond of them, especially when they are no longer soft and warm. I suppose it's the snap I so greatly dislike. It's very disturbing.

Oh dear, I've just been threatened with a frying pan. Nasty woman. She's always muttering about ruling the house elves. She's a little off. Anyway, we house elves truly are amazing. We lift objects that are so much heavier than us and accomplish tasks that should be far beyond our reach. Right, the oh-so-dear couple, I'll get to them in a minute because I'm quite put out with them at the moment. No matter how great and honorable Mr. Potter is, he should not allow my biscuits to go into the hands of another elf.

Right, where was I? Ah yes, dinner. It was an interesting glass -no, not glass or glasses but something like it spectacle to watch. The majority of the students cheerily ate their food like they should be whereas Mr. Draco Malfoy just nibbled, like one of those freakish "bunny" things. Like they're all fluff and fur underneath those ears and teeth. Monster, or mutated spies I call them. Oops, I did it again, always wondering from my point. Mr. Malfoy just picked at his food, brooding and not enjoying his food like he should be. It was lamb! He loves lamb!

One thing I'll never understand about humans is their constant need to contradict themselves. Let's look at Mr. Draco Malfoy for a minute. Here he longs to take Miss Weasley into his arms and say to hell with all of the consequences as long as she's happy and they're together. But on the other, he pushes her away not only to preserve the Malfoy image but also to protect Miss Weasley herself, and in the process hurting her, which is the exact thing he wanted to avoid in the first place.

Humans are confusing creatures. Why can't they be more like ho elves? I shouldn't be the one to try to sort out human emotions; I'll leave that to the house elf in the library. Oh, that's a bit too much information about our little society we have here in Hogwarts. Hopefully it will go unnoticed and be forgotten.

So back to the couple, it was positively sick. Miss Weasley giggled and blushed charmingly at the little things he whispered to her. They acted like they were on their honeymoon or something. She could've passed it off if Miss Ginny Weasley hadn't glanced over at Draco, once, with uncertainty in her eyes. He didn't catch that though. Stupid fool- no...I mean foolish human...no that is disrespectful too- silly Mr. Malfoy. Much better!

Of all of the times to succumb to the silent seduction of the succulent lamb, this truly wasn't the ideal moment. Even if it was perfectly tenderized and exactly to his liking, he should have gone on staring moodily at the happy couple. Apparently he doesn't have the perfect timing we house elves once thought he had.

It reminded me of the old days, when they were dependable. Sorry, it's just some of my lingering bitterness. Those biscuits meant a great deal to me! Anyway, back to Mr. Draco Malfoy, Miss Ginny Weasley was just another person to torment and Miss Ginny Weasley well...she wasn't the happiest person to be around. Those were the days before she became part of a couple. Those were the days indeed.

So as all good things must come to an end, so too did dinner. The treacherous and tricky triangle of love seemed almost nonexistent. It cannot be a triangle if one of the corners is cut. It just doesn't work; well at least in the geometrical sense. The Gryffindor couple walked hand in hand up the stairs towards their tower and the gloomy Slytherin slunk off to the damp dungeons. Stone does not help with the dampness below ground level. It doesn't help with the wood rot either. Thank goodness for our little magic which prevents those inconveniences. Well, in all everyone had a very boring evening. It is depressing.

Personally I think Miss Weasley is avoiding Mr. Malfoy and thus the reason why nothing happened. If only that good old Weasley spunk would spark up and she would go back to looking for trouble. Just because she hated Mr. Draco Malfoy picking on her doesn't mean she did not enjoy picking on him. My favorite out of all of those squabbles was when Ginny asked Draco if he had to special ordered his trousers. It went a little like this.

~

Ginny walked some distance behind the tall blonde who was weaving his way through the crowded hallway. He was walking quite quickly and all she co do was quicken her pace and keep her eyes plastered to the lower part of his torso. A small little smirk spread across her red lips as if an amusing thought had passed through her mind. The smirk quickly disappeared as she bit her lower lip trying to keep her mirth to herself.

"Weasley, I know I have a lovely back side but could you stop staring at my ass like it was a piece of meat?" Draco's cold voice penetrated the red head's thoughts. Her head jerked around trying to find where his voice came from. She spotted him in his usual position, leaning against the wall with his legs and arms crossed and his head slightly tilted to the right.

Ginny's smirk sprung once again to her lips. "And what a large piece of meat it is," she replied calmly.

Draco narrowed his eyes and puckered his lips in thought. "I wish you would make sense, Red. The size of my butt is none of your concern. Now why were you following me and why were you staring at it?" he asked while gesturing to the said portion of his anatomy.

Ginny shrugged and readjusted her shoulder bag, "I was just thinking that the lower part of your body is quite large," her tone was one of patience as if she was explaining something obvious.

Draco glanced downwards and smirked, "Why Ginny, I'm shocked! I didn't think you of all people would have noticed my...abundant size." His eyes glinted with a strange look as he pushed himself off the wall and towards her. "Would you like to see it without any obstructing material?"

"It doesn't. What I'm trying to say is that you look like you wear those trousers," she explained.

"But I don't wear...oh!" He broke off as he began to understand. "So you think my thighs and butt are huge huh?" Ginny began to back up as he menacingly stepped towards her.

"Well yes. It's the quidditch I assume. It uses the same muscles as professional bike riders or speed skaters use. Their butts are huge! And their thighs are like tree trunks." Her hands making a large circle as if to demonstrate how big their legs really are. One of her hands snapped upwards towards her mouth as she realized what she had said. She spun around on one foot and started running in the opposite direction.

Draco just looked at her disappearing figure in shock. "But I still look hot right?" he yelled after her in an almost panicked voice.

A passing Slytherin eyed him up and down before licking her lips. "You sure do Malfoy, you sure do."

~

It's sad that I have to live off memories when a supposedly explosive trio of people full of pent-up emotions does nothing. I suppose they have their excuses. Mr. Draco Malfoy has his father to be wary of and he is a Malfoy. The other two can always blame it on hormones. It's not fair though! They are supposed to fight or win me biscuits at least. Well I suppose everything's all right though. I did earn some biscuits because Mr. Goyle and Mr. Crabbe did go to the infirmary due to overeating. I knew they would, they always overeat until they are in serious pain on lamb night.

I doubt that anything interesting involving my trio of confusion will happen tonight. I'm just going to go back to my other duties for now. They afford me more pleasure than this one. However, I guess there's always hope and I'll just have to see what the night brings.

TBC~>