Just a Fantasy

So I kind of like you...

Does that scare you?

Does it scare you that I may be looking at you in the middle of lunch across the Great Hall one day, any day, watching you talk to your friends and eat with a mesmerized gaze? Does it scare you that I may be tuning out my friends' conversations in the hallways before a class, any class, to watch you with a faraway look in my eyes as you pass by?

Does that scare you?

I hope it does. Not to be mean or anything, of course. Not that you even know. Because you don't know...and I'm kind of glad you don't.

Besides...you hate me.

And I hate you.

It's nothing personal; of course, it's more of a family thing. You know, generations and generations of people from our families who've always hated each other.

...But oh Lord, we'd look so gorgeous together. The pale blonde and the redhead...it's classic.

And we could be like Romeo and Juliet. You know that famous play by that famous muggle playwright, right?

Oh wait...you hate anything to do with muggles. Never mind then, I guess.

Well, it's a pretty boring and clichéd story, actually. I don't really know what all the fuss over it really is now that I think about it. You're not missing much by not reading it. It's just about a boy and a girl who fall in love but their families are enemies. Yatta yatta.

Oh...and they both die...kind of around the same time.

Gasp, so maybe we could die together too! Just like them!

What a novel idea!

I suppose no one would miss you if you died...except for maybe your mother. I never quite understood that woman.

And me...I'd miss you too, except I'd also have to be dead for the whole "Romeo and Juliet" cliché to happen, so that's kind of pointless.

If you ever knew of this...you'd probably kill me. Or laugh.

Most likely the latter.

I suppose I could become all gushy and girly-girl right now and say, "Oh gosh, you have the most beautiful grey eyes."

Or...

"I'm so totally in love with your smile."

Oh, that's right, you don't smile do you?

You smirk.

...Which is kind of why I like you, really.

You're so arrogant. It's pretty attractive actually.

And oh Godric, I have to agree with seventy-five percent of the girl population at Hogwarts in thinking that you're hot.

But it's not really that, you know?

I'm not that superficial.

It's more...you're the opposite of the boy I once liked. You know...him. I mean, not just in appearance...but you're not conservatively chivalrous like him.

...Which is good. Because "conservatively chivalrous" gets pretty annoying. You know...the way he'd always hold a door open for me, or any girl. It's like, "Merlin damn it! I can do things for myself!"

Sometimes...sometimes, I notice you gazing at me too, out of the corner of my eye, when you think I won't notice.

And I'm too afraid that you'll look away to return your gaze.

So I just wonder...what you're thinking. ...What it's like to be you.

I suppose that's another reason why we'd make such a good couple. Beyond appearance and cliché.

I'm not just any other hormonal teenage girl. You're not just another pretty-boy. You're not sweet, kind, or considerate.

Not any more than I'm giggly, quiet, or old-fashioned.

It's quite refreshing, actually.

We'd be kind of like Ron and Hermione, trading insults back and forth.

Except...I suppose if we were ever a couple, we'd have to hide it, or your father would most likely kill you...and me too. That would actually work out wouldn't it? With the whole Romeo and Juliet theme? But you see, unlike you, if I died, there would actually be people who would miss me. Numerous amounts of people...not to be arrogant or anything. That's more your category, isn't it?

So I kind of like you...

You'd probably have a heart attack if you found out. My friends would too. Because you know...we don't belong together. We're enemies.

But even as we don't belong together, we'd still look good together. You know it.

Besides, I've always wanted to be a rebel. As in...do something different.

Dating you would definitely fall into the different category.

You ignore me mostly. You're usually insulting my family, mainly to my brother. I kind of wish you'd pay as much attention to me as you do to said older brother.

You're an only child, aren't you? Lucky you. You don't have an annoying brother who's only one year older than you and always poking into your love life.

Or twin older brothers who are always playing tricks on you. Nor do you have another annoying older brother who's completely obsessed with cauldron bottoms. Seriously, I swear...it's an unhealthy obsession.

Being the youngest and only girl is kind of...well...taxing.

But then...I suppose you're kind of lonely sometimes without siblings when you're home for the holidays. Not that you'd ever admit that you're ever lonely. You have to keep up your image of being the cold Ice King of Slytherin.

So I guess that's another reason why we don't "belong" together. House rivalry. You know, Slytherins and Gryffindors don't mix. So everyone says.

But what if...

What if we just ignored all of that?

You know...the whole destiny "we're meant to be together" thing?

We'd probably be both the most and the least clichéd star-crossed lovers ever to exist.

We could never be together though. So the whole me fancying you...is just...well, it's just a temporary thing I'll have to get over.

Honestly, we'd never be a couple...

After all, I'm Ginny Weasley and you're Draco Malfoy.

Maybe...maybe in the next lifetime this will all work out.

But for now...it's just a fantasy, my secret fantasy.