What I'll Do for You

“You wouldn’t dare,” the first voice said through gritted teeth.

“Oh, but I would!” the second voice said, grinning mischievously.

“How childish you are!”

“Me? Childish?”

“Yes, you. You are very childish.”

“How so?”

“You want revenge! Don’t you know how bad that is?”

“You started it.”

“What did I do this time?”

“You told! You PROMISED!”

“I had a good reason.”

“There is no such thing when it’s a secret between friends, you evil child!”

“Quit referring to yourself in the third person. It gets annoying.”

“Why did you tell them?”

“Because you told them about me making out with Bill!”

He looked puzzled. “I never said anything about—WHAT? You made out with Bill?”

She looked down. “You knew,” she said.

“I did not.”

“Oh, but you did.”

“I tell you I did not.”

Somewhere in the back round, a small redhead slide out of the common room.

“You had to!”

“Who else did you tell?”

“Harry. That’s all.”

“Harry, did you tell?”

Harry looked up from his paper. He was reading the Daily Prophet again. He did this more and more. “Did I tell what?”

“Did you tell anyone about Hermione’s little you-know-what with Bill?”

“Of course not.”

“There you go, Hermione.”

“Ron, this now makes you suspect #1, not to mention the ONLY suspect.” She advanced.

Ron held his hand out before him to stop her. “Hermione, what were talking about before?”

“Um....That,” she said, gesturing at what was held in his hand.

“Oh yes.” He cleared his throat. “I will reveal you, Hermione Elizabeth Granger! So help me God!”

“Ronald Weasley, you tell anyone about that, and I shall have your head on a platter served to your mother!”

“You speak lies!”

“Nay, I do not!”

“Well, haughty lass, I have more on you that could be imagined!”

“Like what?

“Your—“ he said this in a hushed breath––“Sleeping clothes!”

She gasped, then stopped. Her astonished look changed to that of a look of triumph. “I have something on you!”

“What is that, O Brainy One?”

“You—“ she said this in a hushed voice—“sing to Britney Spears music in the shower!”

Ron gasped. “Foul wench!”

She cackled. She always did this when she won.

“But, Hermione.” His grin turned malicious. “I think we’ve forgotten about that time when you flashed—“

”RON! Don’t you dare!” she shrieked.

“Hey, you guys,” he said, calling out to the other Gryffindors. “Guess who flashed—“

Hermione didn’t hear the rest. She was too busy running away.

“Ron...” Harry warned.

“She flashed—What, Harry? Must you ruin my fun?”

“Ron, sit down and think about what you just did. And while you’re at it, give me Hermione’s Wonder Bra. She’ll be looking for it when she gets back,” Harry said calmly.

Ron tossed it into Harry’s outstretched hand. “Yeah, Harry, we all know YOU want to be the one who holds it.” He nudged Harry with his elbow.

Harry shoved Ron back. “Ha ha,” he said sarcastically. “Ron, you want some advice?”

“Sure, Harry.”

“Shut up.”

“Well, then.”