Chiquitita

Chiquitita, tell me what's wrong

You're enchained by your own sorrow

In your eyes there is no hope for tomorrow

He dwelled on the balcony that overlooked the magnanimous mountains and loamy lake with a feeling of dreaded melancholy. The squid's tentacles broke the surface and skimmed the lake, leaving a bubbling white wake after it. The owls and avis that fluttered to and fro were squawking and squeaking happily, so unlike his poignant pathos. He felt the dread well inside his longing soul. The tears were stinging at his eyes, but he fought with them, and won the row. They remained in the deepest sentiment of his soul, still jumping around wildly, fighting to get out and gnashing their teeth. The wildfire of sadness and anger burned his happiness to a fine crisp, leaving only blackness in its path. There was no one who could understand his pain, his anguish. They all thought that conquering the Dark Lord would be a joyful event of celebration, and so did he. But his guess had become a lie, a lie that had sprouted larger and larger. He had to pretend to be joyful, to feign to be normal, to counterfeit his surface emotions of carelessness. To pretend that his life would finally be back to normal. But sadly, this was not so.

It was his last day at Hogwarts, and this was all that was on his clouded mind. He had achieved top grades, and he was going to be an Auror, thanks to McGonagall. An actual, genuine, proud, brave, noble, and stalwart Auror. This was one of the rare things that could bring felicity to his horrible mood lately. But the other emotions overshadowed the felicity more than always. Ron had proposed to Hermione, leaving him to be the fifth wheel. Their lives were now twisted in one amour. Sporadically would you see one without the other. He felt like there was no love for him, nobody cared about him. He had killed off Voldemort, and now he was mostly a normal and useless wizard.

*****

She watched Harry staring sadly at the vast grounds of Hogwarts. He seemed to be deep in thought, and she felt the icy chill of his emotions in the air. She stood on the threshold of the door that lead to the balcony, watching him silently. She twirled a piece of her cerise hair sadly, her brown eyes so watery they looked like melted chocolate.

How I hate to see you like this

There is no way you can deny it

I can see that you're oh so sad, so quiet

She hated to see Harry like this. They had gained a tight friendship after Ron and Hermione had abandoned them. She had sat next to him during meals and did homework with him. Sometimes she even walked him to his classes if they weren't too far out of the way. Often they helped each other with research in the library. Last week on Sunday night, they went on an escapade to the kitchens. One of the elves thought she was Lily! How absurd that sounded! And Harry was James in their eyes, most of them referred to him as James when they came there the next Friday. She tempted the thought of how James and Lily ended up as a happy couple in her mind.

"Harry," she heard herself call him. Her voice sounded as distant as the tooting of the Hogwarts Express off in the background. He turned around quickly, a tear sliding down his face. He quickly wiped it away and stared at her as if she were a veela. The sunset played on her hair, and made it a hundred times brighter and magnificent. The sky itself brought out Harry's emerald eyes. They were shimmering with tears. She felt like crying at seeing his mother's eyes. They reminded her of his many losses in life; a mum was an immense loss. She felt tears sliding down her unblemished face, like a dismal day of rain and ashen clouds. She edged closer, daring to touch him, to hold him. She wanted to tell him it was all right, to lighten his load. He turned back around and tried his best to ignore her. She couldn't allow him to shun her.

She sat down next to her comrade, and wrapped his arm around her. She wanted him to tell her the truth, to tell her everything that haunted his phantasms at night, the thoughts that clouded his mind on a regular basis. She wanted to be as close as a soul-mate to him.

Chiquitita, tell me the truth

I'm a shoulder you can cry on

Your best friend, I'm the one you must rely on

"Please, tell me what's wrong," she whispered. She felt the longing welling in her bosom. He ached to tell her, really, but his honor was in the way. It just wasn't in his character to just burst out crying. He had to be brave; he had to be bold. He decided to tell her his worries, but he would definently not cry. Never in a million years would he sob on her shoulder.

"I...I can't believe that Hogwarts is over. It's been a home to me all this time, and now..."

He broke off with a choke. He had to stop for his reputation's sake. Then he wondered about why he was concerned about what she thought about him. The same concern had happened when he wanted to impress Cho Chang in fifth year. That must mean...

That he loved her.

Instantly he didn't care if he cried, just to prove to himself that he didn't love her. He was embarrassed with himself, yet something lingered in the back of him. Maybe this was a different kind of affection. Perhaps this was real love, and not just a silly crush.

"I don't want to leave you," he finished. He felt more tears fall down his face, and his face burning so crimson he expected the tears to rise up in steam. Yet he had the sensation of relief at releasing these words. It seemed as though pressure had lifted to leave him relaxed and happy. He decided to go a step further and dug his nose in her shoulder, and cried even more. This was the most he had even cried in his life.

You were always sure of yourself

Now I see you've broken a feather

I hope we can patch it up together

"Harry, I will never leave you," she croaked.

Chiquitita, you and I know

How the heartaches come and they go and the scars they're leaving

You'll be dancing once again and the pain will end

You will have no time for grieving

She joined in his sobs, and rested her head on his, fastened her hands around his. The night's chill did not bother the warmth between the two. She wanted to bask in his warmth forever, to sink into his soul and dwell there with him. The sun set finally, darkness engulfed them. The stars were born in the night as the minutes passed. She felt that though the sun had set, there was still the brightness of hope lingering.

Chiquitita, you and I cry

But the sun is still in the sky and shining above you

Let me hear you sing once more like you did before

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

Try once more like you did before

She fell asleep and slid in his lap. She dreamt of wonderful things, about Harry and their lives together. She dreamt of past times when Harry smiled at least once a day, times where laughter wasn't a surprise issue from his lips. She wished they were real.

Harry watched her intently, admiring her every feature. He stroked her cheeks and ran his fingers through her hair. His cheeks felt dry from the tears that had evaporated along with his sadness. He picked her up with ease and brought her back to the Gryffindor Tower. And as he walked, his spirit lifted into a new light of hope.

Sing a new song, Chiquitita

Try once more like you did before

Sing a new song, Chiquitita