Second Chances

Draco Malfoy stood before the full length mirror, struggling to get his ruffled silk cravat to lie down properly against the front of his new dress robes. He had been fighting with the cravat for a full fifteen minutes, and it simply refused to cooperate. With a frustrated scowl, Draco ripped the offending garment off and threw it down onto the dressing table in disgust.

Smiling slightly, Lucius turned his son to face him, retrieved the cravat, and made quick work of settling it into place.

"There," Lucius said, turning Draco towards the mirror. "You look quite handsome, Draco. At least you would if you would stop grimacing."

"Sorry, Father," Draco mumbled, trying to tame a stray lock of hair.

With a little 'tut', Lucius righted his son's hair as he had the cravat. "Honestly, Draco, I've never seen you in such a state," he rebuked mildly.

"Yes, well, I've never been about to be married before," Draco retorted sharply.

Lucius' eyes darkened slightly at Draco's insolent response. "One would think you were having second thoughts."

"One would be right," Draco muttered. He turned to look into his father's eyes, searching there for answers to the questions that troubled him. "Marriage is meant to be a promise of eternal love. How can I make such a promise when I'm not even certain I know what love is?"

"Don't be melodramatic, Draco," Lucius said, his brow furrowing and jaw clenching slightly in annoyance. "Marriage is a business venture. A contract. Is has nothing to do with love, eternal or otherwise."

Pushing aside his worries, Draco gave his father a small, forced smile. "Sorry, Father. I suppose I'm just nervous."

Lucius returned the smile. "I recall feeling more than a little nervous on my own wedding day. The prospect of marrying a woman like Narcissa Black was rather daunting. Thinking ahead to your wedding night helps," he confided with a wicked little grin.

Draco turned pale. The last thing he wanted to think about was having it off with his wife, but he certainly didn't want to try to explain that to his father. He glanced at the clock, wishing there was a way off of this path he had been made to tread.

"It's time," Lucius said.

'It's time,' Draco thought, the words repeating in his head, sounding his doom. Time to go and stand and wait for his bride to join him at the altar. Time to speak his vows. Time to let go of his own hopes and dreams and settle into the life his parents had chosen for him.

*******************************

Pansy Parkinson Malfoy was radiant in her snowy white wedding robes. She clung happily to her new husband's arm, smiling brightly. She, at least, had no qualms about the marriage.

Draco pretended to listen to the small talk going on around him, but his mind was on other things. Mostly he considered the vows he and Pansy had taken, the promises they had just made to one another. Pansy, he knew, would never 'obey' him. He wondered if her breaking that vow would cancel out the fact that he had promised to love her but never would.

The wedding reception seemed to last forever, but at last the proprieties had been observed and Draco and Pansy were ushered off to begin their life together.

When the couple reached the elegant hotel where they would spend their honeymoon, Pansy smiled coyly at Draco and excused herself to 'tidy up'. Fighting down a wave of nervousness and nausea, Draco dug through his luggage. He quickly located that which he sought - a small vial filled with rose-coloured liquid.

Draco unstoppered the vial and downed the potion, grimacing slightly at its sickly sweet taste. By the time he and Pansy had both finished showering and dressing for bed, the potion would be working. He thanked Snape silently for being such an effective potions teacher. With the help of the potion, his bride would never know that he couldn't stand the thought of consummating their marriage.

***********************************

The two week honeymoon passed quickly, although not as quickly as Draco would have liked. By the time they returned to Malfoy Manor, his potion stores were almost entirely depleted, and he was beginning to despair. Once they were ensconced in the manor, however, Pansy found other ways to occupy her time, and the two fell into a comfortable routine of ignoring one another almost completely.

If Pansy ever noticed that her husband never initiated sex, she kept her mouth shut about it. She did, however, begin to complain about how he never spent time with her, about how they never went out to the big soirees that she and Narcissa both loved, and about living with his parents. Eventually, Draco tired of her complaints and agreed to move into a home of their own.

Initially, Narcissa and Lucius were less than pleased with the idea of their son and daughter-in-law moving from the family home. A few days later, however, Pansy announced that she was pregnant, and the older couple quickly changed their minds. Neither of them really wanted to deal with a crying baby at their ages.

Draco hoped fervently for a son. If his firstborn turned out to be a boy who would one day inherit the Malfoy fortune and who could carry on the Malfoy name, then his conjugal duties would be complete and he would no longer be obligated to have relations with his wife.

Fate plays by its own rules, however. The child was a girl, small and pink and perfect. Draco fell in love with her the moment he first looked down at her tiny face. He forgot to be disappointed that she was not the son he had wanted.

Pansy wanted to name their daughter 'Rose'. Draco laughed at the irony, which Pansy would not appreciate if she knew of the rose-based potion he had to dose himself with to be able to create this tiny little miracle.

"I think not," he said simply. "Her name shall be Seraphine. Seraphine Angelica Malfoy."

He silently dared Pansy to argue with him, but she agreed readily. She almost always did. It was one of the things that most annoyed Draco about his wife.

*******************

Seraphine grew, as children do, and Draco enjoyed every moment to the fullest. Pansy, however, took little interest in the child. In fact, she was quite jealous of all the time that Draco spent with his infant daughter - time that Pansy felt he should be spending with her.

"We have house elves to look after her, Draco," she told him often.

He ignored her and continued to care for his daughter himself.

Seraphine's first word, unsurprisingly, was 'Dada'. She soon learned to say 'Mama' as well, but only because her father wished it of her.

On Sera's first birthday, Pansy informed Draco that she was pregnant again. Again, Draco hoped for a boy. This time Draco got his wish - in spades.

Before Sera had been in the world eighteen months, Damien and Adrian Malfoy were born. Before the twins were six months old, Draco had moved into his own bedroom.

Life continued on, Draco busy with his three children, Pansy busy with her high society goings on. Despite their paper marriage, Draco was quite happy. He needed nothing beyond the small, warm, wiggly bodies that begged to be picked up and cuddled on his lap.

When Seraphine was three, she was - as all three year olds are - inquisitive, impulsive, and headstrong. Her two year old brothers were very much the same, and the three of them together could overwhelm anyone. Draco was no saint, and sometimes he lost his temper and raised his voice to his precious babies, but there was never any doubt of his love for them - or of their love for him.

Pansy was a different story. She wanted nothing whatever to do with her children. In Draco's opinion, she did not deserve the title of 'Mother'. Although his own mother had often been distant, he had at least been certain of Narcissa's love for him. He felt his babies were missing out on something very important, but he didn't have any idea what to do about it.

Just a few days before Sera turned four she decided to try out her mother's cosmetic potions. Pansy caught her at it and flew into a rage at seeing the child covered in gobs of very expensive personalised cr譥s and salves and reeking of designer perfume.

"What do you think you're doing?" Pansy yelled. "You never ever touch anything that dosn't belong to you! You are never to come into my rooms again!"

She jerked the girl up from her chair, shaking her violently as she screamed into her cherubic little face.

Draco, drawn by the shouting, rushed in and snatched his daughter from his wife's vice-like grip.

"What the fuck is the matter with you?" he cried. He cradled his daughter to his chest, stroking her soft blonde curls in an attempt to calm the sobs that racked her small body. "It's all right," he crooned, striding out of the room.

Once he was certain that Sera hadn't been hurt, he cleaned her up and turned her and the twins over to the house elves so that he could have a talk with his wife. He confronted her about her earlier actions, hoping to see some sign of remorse. Pansy held her ground, however.

"I'm going home," Draco informed her. "You're welcome to stay here - in fact I'll sign the house over to you. But the children and I are going back to the Manor."

"What are you talking about?" Pansy wanted to know.

"I'm leaving you, Pansy. Is that clear enough for you?"

"You can't!" She screamed. "You can't leave me! The marriage contract..."

"I can and I am," Draco cut her off. The finality in his voice shut her up momentarily, and he stalked out before she could say another word.

Truthfully, Draco had no desire to return to Malfoy Manor. He knew his parents adored their grandchildren, but he also knew they would be unable to endure them on a daily basis. As he supervised the house elves in packing his and the children's things, he tried to decide what alternatives he might have. In the end, he decided to go back to the Manor and adjust his plans as needed.

***************

Lucius and Narcissa greeted their son and grandchildren with open arms. Within a few days, however, the children had begun to grate on Lucius' nerves, and he began giving Draco advice on discipline and training.

Draco didn't want his children growing up as he had -controlled mostly by fear of his father. He no longer feared the man - he knew that as Lucius' son he was mostly safe from the man's temper - but years of living under the shadow of that temper had left its mark on him. He wanted better for his children. He simply could not bear the thought of subjecting Sera and the twins to Lucius' childrearing methods.

After consulting with his mother, Draco decided to take advantage of the family fortune. He and the children would travel, spending time in the Malfoy-owned homes scattered across the globe.

"Stay away until this Voldemort mess is over and done with, Draco," Narcissa advised him. "Your father says the man's gone a bit mad, lost his focus. He isn't at all certain that Riddle isn't going to be brought down. Should Dumbledore win the upcoming confrontation, your absence will keep you safe from the Ministry. Should Voldemort win....should Voldemort win, Draco, I must ask you not to return. If the man is as far gone as your father believes, Britain will no longer be safe. I won't have my grandchildren's lives risked needlessly."

Draco eagerly complied, whisking his children away at once. When Seraphine reached an age to begin school - at Hogwarts or the foreign equivalent - he would settle down again, but in the meantime, they would see the world and he would teach them what they needed to know.

Taking his mother's advice to heart, Draco considered what Voldemort's downfall would mean. Likely most of the Dark Lord's followers - Draco's father among them - would end up dead or in Azkaban. Those left behind would have to keep their noses clean and play at being 'politically correct.' In order to fit into what Draco privately thought of as 'Dumbledore's New World Order', he would need to learn to co-exist peacefully with Muggles and Mudbloods - no matter how distasteful that thought might be.

As he traveled with his children, Draco began to teach them and himself as much as possible about the Muggle world. They stayed for a time in an upscale Muggle hotel, discovering the delights of electricity, television, McDonald's hamburgers, and Muggle music. The more Draco saw of the Muggle world, and Muggle ingenuity, the more he developed a grudging respect for the magically impaired.

Freed from the constraints of polite society and the shadow of their overbearing mother, the children blossomed. They all showed signs of magic early on, to their father's delight, and they were quick to learn their lessons.

Seraphine showed an affinity for reading, writing, and drawing. She surprised her father one day by announcing, quite unexpectedly, that she would be Britain's Minister of Magic one day. Of course, within a few days she had decided she would rather be a prima ballerina, and soon afterwards she wanted to be an astronaut. No matter what her dream job of the week was, all of Sera's goals had one thing in common: they involved going farther, moving faster, working harder, and doing more than anyone else. She simply wanted to be the best.

Adrian, an affectionate little scrapper, was closer to his sister than to his twin. Often Adrian turned to his sister, rather than his father, when he had a bump or a scrape. He was steadfastly loyal to her - and his father and brother as well. He was also fearless, and often frightened his father by putting himself into death-defying situations that he always managed to come out of with hardly a scratch.

Damien developed a love for music and Muggle television early on. Although Draco didn't want his son becoming too attached to anything that was strictly Muggle, he indulged the child and let him watch entirely too much television. Damien continued to cling to his daddy such that Draco hardly ever had a moment to himself, but the telly would often buy him a little time. Sometimes Draco wondered if the clinging wasn't just an act that Damien devised to make certain that Draco allowed the boy to watch his beloved cartoons.

Life was far from perfect for the little family. They had their share of fevers, nightmares, disagreements, temper tantrums, and - in the case of the twins - even the occasional fistfight.

Adrian, for the most part, was a good-natured child, loving and eager to please. He would occasionally do something- like trying to ride a wild Granian foal - which was stupid and life threatening, but not strictly forbidden. Typically, Draco was so relieved to have his son alive and intact that he forgot to punish the boy for his escapades.

Damien developed a bad habit of talking back to his father, something Draco would never have dared to do as a child. Sometimes the urge to slap the boy's insolent little mouth almost overwhelmed Draco, and he had to force himself to walk away and count to ten before continuing the confrontation and doling out punishment.

Sera remained headstrong and insatiably curious. When she took apart his brand new racing broom to see how many straws it took to make one, Draco had to vent his anger loudly and abruptly to avoid spanking her, but avoid it he did.

Pansy had been quick to resort to slapping or spanking, although she knew Draco disapproved. Only upon leaving Pansy did he realise how horribly she had treated his children. Often he regretted not having left her sooner, before those slaps grew more violent. Draco had vowed to himself that he would never - under any circumstances - put himself on her level.

If he sometimes felt that something was missing from his life, Draco never said anything. He loved his children, and he was quite happy being a single father. He was proud of his daughter and sons and delighted in their small triumphs. All in all, he felt that he had been given a better life than he had ever dreamed of.

A few months after her eleventh birthday, Seraphine received her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. Voldemort had recently been vanquished, making it safe for them to return to Britain, so Draco left the choice of schools up to Sera. She decided at once that she wanted to attend the same school her father had. Draco and the children again moved into Malfoy Manor on a temporary basis, just until Draco managed to purchase a moderately sized home for the four of them near Hogsmeade. He was unable to bear the thought of being far away from any of his children.

Draco managed to procure a portkey to take them to the train station so that Sera could make the customary voyage to Hogwarts. She thought it daft, but he put her on the train anyway. He stood at the station and watched her go. Beside him, Damien watched with excitement flashing in his eyes. On his other side, Adrian was clinging to him for support and crying openly.

Seraphine was sorted into Slytherin, much to the surprise of no one. She did well in her classes, avoided getting any detentions, and made a few friends. She was happy at Hogwarts, but missed her father and her brothers - and told them so often in her letters.

That first year of separation was hell on all of them, but they somehow made it through. The next September, the twins accompanied Sera to Hogwarts, and Draco was left feeling bereft.

Damien joined his sister in Slytherin. Adrian, much to the boy's horror, was placed into Hufflepuff. He wanted very much to be with his sister, and his brother, and begged his father to make Headmistress McGonagall place him in Slytherin.

After a brief visit with McGonagall in which he expressed his concerns for his youngest child and shared his letter with her, but made no request to change his son's House affiliation, Draco wrote a reply to his son. He encouraged Adrian to walk his own path, and reminded him that even though the other two were not in his same House, there was nothing to keep them from spending their free time together. He reminded Adrian also that he, Sera, and Damien would all always be there for him if he needed them.

On October 31^st, Draco celebrated his thirty-second birthday alone. Owls brought him handmade birthday cards from his children and well-wishes from his parents. To his great surprise, another owl arrived, bearing the Hogwarts seal and strangely familiar handwriting.

To his even greater surprise, the letter was signed 'Harry Potter'.