Vector's Challenge

Chapter 14 - October Staff Meeting

It was time for the monthly staff meeting, and Emmy Vector was in an absolutely foul mood. According to her records, Snape had managed to act fairly towards all the students for one month. She had only one argument left to convince the faculty that she was the true winner.

She marched into the staff common room with her graphs and folders, and slammed then down onto the table as hard as she could. All of the conversations stopped. Everyone turned around to look at her.

"Ladies and gentlemen," Emmy began, "I know that you are all aware of the wager that Severus and I made in August. He is under the impression that he has won. I submit to you that he has not."

"What sort of example would welshing on the bet set for the students, Emmy?" Quintus Tolliver, the ancient Muggle Studies Professor, asked.

She thought, You old goat, I know you'd rather watch the dance than observe hygiene. I'm not welshing, I want justice here. After I win, I wouldn't mind dancing for Severus privately. "Oh, I don't plan to welsh on it. I argue that Severus's informing the student body of the terms of the bet and encouraging his House to act in a manner that would guarantee him the win skewed the conditions so badly that it was impossible to get a fair test, and thus, due to his actions, I in fact win."

"What are you going on about, woman?" Severus asked her.

Emmy sounded like a judge passing sentence. "You had to cheat in order to win. You had to drag your students into it. You couldn't win the bet fair and square,"

"I told you why I told the students what was going on," Severus said through clenched teeth. "Have you forgotten that so soon, Emmy?"

She swallowed. "No, " she quietly replied. She looked him in the eyes. "But there's a principle at stake."

"I see," he said, rolling his eyes. "Then let the other members of the faculty judge whether the terms of the bet have been met."

"Very well. I agree." She turned toward the other professors. "All right, who bet on me, and who bet on Severus?" Emmy asked.

Consternation and babbling broke out. "Emmy!" Severus said, thinking Just bloody wonderful. Now I get to find out whom my enemies really are. Not that I didn't know, but still - He stopped short of the thought that there was a principle at stake.

"Snape, we have to know. I want this to be as fair as possible," she said. She thought, Look what I got into the last time I worried about fairness. But never mind...

They sorted it out. Flitwick, McGonagall, Grubbly-Plank, Trelawney, and Pomfrey for Vector, and Dumbledore, Sinistra, Hooch, Arabella Figg the Defense Professor, and Halekkala, the Ancient Runes Professor, for Snape. Hagrid had been keeping the book for everyone else. Emmy and Severus agreed that he had to be one of the judges. The two Hufflepuffs, Sprout and Tolliver, had also stayed out of it, as had Binns.

Emmy began her argument. "I submit to you, ladies and gentlemen, that because Severus informed his House of the terms of the bet, they changed their behavior. He knew they would change their behavior in order to get Slytherin to win, and therefore he skewed the conditions of the bet. This was not what I bargained for when we placed the bet; therefore there was no true meeting of the minds, and I cannot be held to the terms of the wager."

Severus cleared his throat. "The terms of the wager never said one word about whether the students would know. It was simply immaterial, and not germane to the bet. I have satisfied its terms by maintaining perfect fairness in my dealings, as Professor Vector would see it, with the students for one month, so therefore Professor Vector should be held to the terms she agreed to."

Dumbledore leaned back in his chair, and brought his fingertips together. "Emmy, didn't you inform students in your House about the terms of the wager?"

"Yes, I did," she muttered. "After they found out about it from Gryffindor."

"And what exactly did you tell them about it?"

"I told them that Professor Snape and I had made a bet that he could not be fair to all the students for one month, and that when he lost, I'd wash his hair for him in the Great Hall on Halloween, but that if he did win, that I'd do a belly dance in the Great Hall on Halloween. Ask Severus what he said to his lot, why don't you?"

"What did you say to Slytherin House, Severus?"

"I told my House that I was disappointed that they had not discovered the existence and nature of the bet earlier, and I informed them what the terms of the bet were."

"So by that standard, all the students knew and therefore both of you skewed the playing field. One cancels the other out."

"Absolutely not, sir!" Emmy shouted out. "Everyone knows that the Slytherins changed their behavior, and my graphs show nobody else did."

"That's because the Ravenclaws are knowledgeable enough to get around your graphs," Snape hissed.

"Are you accusing me?" Emmy asked him.

"Are you admitting it?" Snape retorted.

The teachers all started arguing among themselves. Finally, Dumbledore had to raise his own voice to call Binns, Hooch, Tolliver, and Hagrid to take a vote on the issue.

"All those who hold that Severus invalidated the terms of the bet, answer aye," Dumbledore said. Binns answered "Aye."

Snape glowered at Binns, and thought, Does he hate me, or did he just wake up?

"All those who hold that Severus did not invalidate the terms of the bet, answer nay," Dumbledore said. "Nay," said three voices in unison.

"The nays have it," Dumbledore announced. The other teachers started quietly conversing with each other.

Snape turned toward Emmy. "I'm terribly sorry to inform you, dear Emmy, but I think that you've lost the wager," Snape purred, with a smug smirk on his face. "However, I've graciously decided that I don't want to see you publicly humiliated after all, so I'm releasing you from the terms."

"What precisely are you going on about, Severus?" Vector snapped out.

"I'm offering you an out, woman! You don't have to do the dance and publicly make a fool out of yourself!"

Emmy Vector's jaw dropped, and worked for a moment. Then she recovered. "What makes you think that I am going to make a public fool out of myself, Severus?"

"Well - I -"

"Severus, I am bloody well going to bloody dance to the best of my bloody ability, and we'll see who's the bloody fool on bloody Halloween night!" Emmy's brown eyes were again bright with rage, and she almost looked for a moment as if she were about to hit him. Then she spun on her heel and marched off, her back ramrod straight, her hands clenching and unclenching as she stalked away from him. He could hear her muttering, "bloody damned great bat - I'll show him - thinks I can't dance - stupid man" as she headed for the door of the staff common room. She slammed it behind her with a resounding crash.

Snape thought to himself, Now I remember why I never try to be magnanimous. I try to do her a favor, she would have been off the hook, and all I would have done would be to hold it over her for the rest of our careers. What's unfair about that?