Hope and Fear

Part 4. Plans and Preparations

***

The sky turned dark as twilight fell and all hope left Ginny. That little voice inside her that had been telling her that Snape was wrong, and Harry would be all right fell silent. She wandered through the castle toward the kitchen with her arms wrapped around herself. She would have to do it, and she could never let anyone know why. Yes, forget why. That was the only way she could make herself do it. Forget that this means the love of her life will probably be dead in just a few months. "No, don't think about that!" she told herself.

Looking up, Ginny realized that she had arrived at the entrance to the kitchen. She reached up, tickled the pear, and turned the doorknob that appeared. The kitchen was a scene of controlled chaos as house elves bustled in every direction. The enticing aroma of freshly prepared food reminded Ginny of how little she had eaten that day.

"Good evening, Miss," came a voice near the stove. Dobby stepped forward and gave an elegant bow that Ginny recognized as one Harry sometimes used. "How may we be helping you tonight?"

"Harry is in Professor Dumbledore's office and will miss dinner," she said to the smiling house-elf. "Can you prepare a plate of food for him that I can bring up to the common room?" Before she could finish asking the question, a large platter piled with more food than Harry could possibly eat was assembled next to her.

"Will this do, Miss?" Dobby asked, placing the platter on a tray with utensils and a large pitcher of pumpkin juice.

"Thank you Dobby," she said. Suddenly, an idea occurred to her. "Um... Dobby, may I have a word in private?"

The rest of the kitchen staff gave them suspicious looks as Ginny and the house-elf stepped into a quiet corner. "You remember the private chamber you made for Harry and Ron?" Ginny asked in a soft voice.

"Yes, Miss. Dobby cleans up in there, when he can get in, of course." Dobby turned a little pink and shifted uncomfortably.

"Well, uh...," she said, trying to plow through her embarrassment. "Harry and I will be doing some, uh ...work there next Friday night after exams, and I was wondering if we

could have a special dinner brought there." Ginny could feel her cheeks starting to redden.

"Special how, Miss?" he asked with a puzzled expression.

"Um... romantic special," she answered, in a small voice.

"A romantic dinner for Miss and Harry Potter?" Dobby exclaimed in a loud voice.

"Shhh, Dobby," Ginny hissed, looking around.

"It's all right Miss, they know all about the private dinners Dobby brings to young couples," the house-elf smiled.

"You've done this before?" Ginny asked, amazed.

"Oh yes, Miss. Dobby is always getting paid to bring lovely food to secret places." Dobby beamed, holding the lapel of his sweater.

"I see, well then you must know what to do," she said, somewhat shocked, but relieved to know how common this was.

"Oh, yes Miss." Dobby said producing a menu from his pocket and handing it to Ginny. "Now will you be wanting anything, specific?"

When Ginny looked at the menu she saw a list of fancy meals and spirits, each with an equally fancy price listed to one side. Across the top of the menu, written in George's handwriting, was "Dobby's Dine Out - Let us cater your next affair."

"Well, I don't have much pocket money, just a nice..."

Dobby snapped his fingers and the prices on the side of the page vanished. "For Harry Potter and Miss, it would be Dobby's pleasure," grinned the house-elf.

"Oh, Dobby no, I couldn't," she stammered.

"Now, now, Miss, hurt Dobby's feelings you will," he chimed indignantly. "Might I suggest a lovely May Flower wine with dinner, or a good Elf Hold brandy with dessert?"

"I wouldn't know what to ..." Ginny started to say.

"Or!!!" Dobby's eyes lit up. "Just last week Dobby got hold of a few bottles of Fay Fairy Champagne," he said, bouncing up and down on his heals and wiggling his ears. "The very best."

"I ...I've never had Champagne before," she said, a giddy feeling stirring in her.

"Champagne it is then, Miss," the house-elf called before she could say anything else. He walked over to the tray he prepared earlier, rubbing his hands together. "I will pick a nice meal for you and have everything ready for eight next Friday night," he said, handing her the tray.

She reached down to take the tray from him and kissed him on the cheek when she did. "Thank you, Dobby," she whispered and walked out of the kitchen with the tray.

***

Entering the common room with the tray of food, Ginny felt better about what was happening. Now that she had started planing her get-together it was much easier to forget why she had to do it. She had a mission and she could concentrate on that; seduce Harry Potter.

Harry had a most infuriating streak of decency that Ginny would have to overcome if he was going to make wild careless love to her. She set the tray down on one of the tables and sat down in an sofa to wait for Harry. "I should make the most of this since it might be my only chance." The thought popped into her mind before she could stop it and her stomach twisted. "No! Don't think about that!" She slammed her fist into the couch in frustration.

"Hi, Ginny"

Ginny jumped and looked up to see Harry smiling down at her. "Hi, Harry. How did it go?" she said, forcing a smile. He had a tired expression on his face but he looked really glad to see her. He absentmindedly loosened the top buttons of his shirt as he tossed his robe and tie over the sofa.

"As well as can be expected," he sighed, sitting down next to her and taking off his glasses. "Professor Dumbledore always takes it badly when one of his ex-students dies, no matter which side they were on." He poured himself a glass of iced pumpkin juice and held it to his forehead and closed his eyes. Ginny watched as a bead of condensation slowly slid down the side of the glass before dropping to his chest. She started to smile as thoughts of what she was planning ran through her mind, but stopped when she saw the pained expression on his face.

Ginny reached around his neck and massaged the tension out of his shoulder muscles. "There was nothing you could have done," she said softly. "And he was trying to kill you."

"I just get tired of so much death, no matter who it is," he sighed, relaxing under Ginny's touch. "The Deatheaters are as much Riddle's victims as the muggles." Ginny ran her fingers up his neck and caressed his soft hair before pulling his head down and giving him a tender kiss.

"What was that for?" he asked, looking into her eyes.

"Just being you," she said tenderly.

Harry leaned his head forward and rested it on Ginny's shoulder. "I just hope that's enough," he sighed quietly.

***

Ron and Hermione sat in the two large arm chairs of the Uncommon Room as a cheerful fire crackled in the grate before them. Ron was reading out loud of a large text book as Hermione stared quietly into the flames. "The mass involved in self transfiguration is related to the following. The proper emphasis on the vowel sounds of the spell, as well as ... Hermione?"

"What? Oh sorry Ron, vowel sounds and dimension of wand use," she said, looking up, flustered.

"That's probably the only time you've been distracted from studying when I wasn't the cause," he smiled slyly. "Is there someone else that I should know about?"

When his jibe didn't even change the anxious expression on Hermione's face he became concerned. "What's wrong, are you worried about Harry too?"

"No, well...yes, but no more than usual." She sighed in an offhand way, still gazing into the fire. "Ron, you know what happened in the village today..." She faced him with a scared look in her eyes. "Could you have gotten out of that?"

"Surprised in a magically sealed house with an exploding assassin," he intoned blankly before looking into her eyes with a grim expression. "No way." Hermione bit her hand to keep herself from crying and turned back to the fire. "But I'm not the boy who lived either, they wouldn't go to that much trouble for me," he said, kneeling before her chair and taking her hand.

"Ron," she whispered, her voice wavering. "You are the son of the Minister of Magic and a future Auror. You are not exactly a low profile target." She reached over and stroked his hair. "These last couple of weeks down here I'd managed to forget what was going on in the world. I can see now that I've been playing house, trying to pretend all of this wasn't so."

Ron moved forward and kissed her passionately pressing her head back into the soft cushion of the armchair. "This might not be our house, but I'm not pretending," he said softly to her. "Voldemort may be able to kill me but he can't take my life, because my life is the time I spend with you."

Hermione kissed him back and wrapped her arms around him as she slid off the chair to kneel next to him. "That doesn't change anything," she said slipping his shirt off him.

"I know," he said pulling off her sweater. "But it's all I can do."

***

The next morning Harry met Ginny in the common room to go down to breakfast together. He had been afraid that she would still be upset by what happened in Hogsmeade yesterday, but she seemed to be all right now. They entered the great hall and found Ron and Hermione sitting at the Gryffindor table.

"So, decided to rejoin the school?" Harry asked with a smirk.

"With Snape on the warpath we thought that maybe we should keep out of the Uncommon Room for a while." Ron said in a dejected tone. Harry had the distinct impression there was more to it than this, and that the idea had not been his.

"Probably a good idea, I heard him asking about you last night," Ginny said in a casual voice.

Ron and Hermione exchanged dark looks, but Harry noticed the color rising in Ginny's cheeks. Before Harry could wonder what this might mean, his thoughts were interrupted by the arrival of mail. He caught a glimpse of white feathers near the roof and suddenly panicked. "Damn, that owl is fast," he thought.

"I forgot something in my room, I'll be back in a second," he said quickly, and dashed out the door before Hedwig could sweep down to him. He waited in the entrance hall for a moment until an extremely annoyed hoot sounded from the main door. Hedwig swooped in and landed on his shoulder digging her talons into him a little more than was necessary. "Sorry Hedwig, but I couldn't let the others see this," he said, stroking her gleaming plumage. She hooted in an indulgent way as she dropped a package into his hand. Harry tore off the note attached to it and read quickly.

Dear Harry

I received your instructions and have retrieved the item you requested. I ask you to think carefully about what you are doing. This will affect everything around you and you should be very careful before you proceed. I hope things work out the way you have planned, and please keep me informed.

Good luck,

Remus Lupin

Harry folded up the letter and put it in his pocket. He looked at the package with its plain brown wrapping and string and felt his heart begin to beat faster. His hands began to untie the bindings when he thought "No, it would be dangerous to open it here." He stuffed the package into his robes and set off toward his dorm room with Hedwig hooting on his shoulder.

***

Ginny watched Harry rush out the door with her eyes narrowed in suspicion. "Now what is he up to?" Ginny wondered crossly. "Maybe he found a way to join The Ridiculously Dangerous Auror Suicide Squad," she thought bitterly. Horror struck at what just went through her mind she bit her lip hard and whispered to her self, "Stop thinking about it!"

To clear her mind Ginny started on the next part of her plan. She wanted to ask Parvati for help with her hair next Friday night. Parvati was acknowledged as the absolute best girl in the house when it came to hair, and Ginny wanted to look extra special for her date as much for her sake as Harry's. Ginny looked up and down the table but didn't see her.

"Do you know where Parvati is?" she asked Hermione.

"I think she said that she wanted to research Venus in the astronomy tower earlier this morning," Hermione answered still gazing at Ron. "It's probably set by now, but maybe she's still there."

Ginny hurried up the corridor leading to the astronomy tower. The tower seemed deserted which didn't surprise Ginny much as it was a Sunday morning. If she was quick she might just have enough time before service to talk to Parvati. She was in such a rush that she didn't think to knock as she burst through the door leading to the turret of the tower. "Parvati," she cried looking around. A pair of muffled yelps, and the sound of scuttling came from a shadowed corner out of sight of the door. "Parvati, it's Ginny," she said tentatively.

"G... Ginny?" a flushed Parvati said, coming around the corner of the tower. "What are you doing here?" Her skirt was rumpled and she was hastily buttoning her blouse.

"I...uh just wanted to know if I could get your help with my..." Ginny turned to see the other figure joining them. "Seamus," she said, amazed.

Parvati led Ginny away a few steps "Ginny, please don't tell Lavender about this. We both agreed we wouldn't speak to Seamus again, but things just sort of happened," she whispered with a sheepish expression.

"Um... I'll just be going then. See you later," Seamus said, winking at Parvati who beamed at him.

"Don't worry, my lips are sealed," she said casting a dubious look at Seamus who was tucking in his shirt as he walked toward the door.

"Thanks Ginny, what did you need my help with?" Parvati asked as she straightened her clothes.

"My hair. I have a kind of a date next Friday night after the exams and I'll need some help getting ready."

Ginny must have blushed a little as she said this because Parvati's eyes lit up and she began to giggle softly. "So little Chaser Ginny finally gets to handle the Quaffle," she teased.

"Parvati!" Ginny gasped, turning scarlet, and they both started giggling. "Don't let Harry know, it's kind of a surprise.

"Ohh.. an ambush! Have you thought about what you are going to wear?" Parvati cooed.

"Um.. no actually," Ginny said blankly.

"Lavender has some really sexy outfits she ordered from an ad in the Quibbler. I'm sure she would lend one to you," Parvati said

Ginny started to get excited again as she imagined what she could do with some really exciting clothes. "That would be great, thanks a lot," she smiled as they headed down the tower for service.

After dinner Ginny walked down the fifth floor corridor to look for Lavender rather than wait in the Common Room for her. She was sure she would run into Harry there and wouldn't be free to talk about her plans, but that wasn't the only reason she didn't want to see Harry. The truth was that the weight of this secret was wearing her down. She didn't know how much longer she could keep this to herself. The spectre of a life without Harry scared her much more than the idea of raising a child alone.

"You're thinking about death, aren't you?" a morose voice sounded from above her.

"What!" Ginny nearly jumped out of her skin. She looked up to see the gloomy visage of Moaning Myrtle hovering pearly white above her.

"Death. You were thinking very hard about it, I can always tell," Myrtle whined in her usual self pitying manner.

"Go away Myrtle, I wasn't thinking about death," Ginny lied trying to get a hold of herself. Talking about this with the most unpleasant ghost in the castle was the last thing she wanted to do.

"Yes, you were," Myrtle crowed in a obstinate way. "I can feel it in your soul. Who is going to die?"

"No one, I was just...worried about Harry is all," she stammered. "Now why don't you go back..."

"Oooh... Is Harry going to die?" Myrtle cried in a voice that was nothing less than jubilant.

Ginny's stomach twisted and she felt a surge of white hot anger course through her. Before she knew what she was doing her wand was pointing at Myrtle and she was yelling at the top of her lungs, "Harry isn't going to die, so you can't have him, you pathetic sack of slime! Now go away before I see if those undead curses really work!"

"Fine, chase me out of my bathroom, chase me out of the hallway I'll just try to find a place where no one has to endure my pathetic company!" Myrtle's howls echoed through the halls as she swept away.

Tears were streaming down her face as she put her wand away and ducked into an empty classroom. More than anything she wanted to find Harry, to let it all out to have him tell her everything was all right. She couldn't do that, so she sat down and tried to get a hold of her emotions. If she needed any more proof that she would have to do the seduction soon the fact that she let Moaning Myrtle get to her would have been it. She had finally calmed down and was just getting up to head back to the Common Room when something Myrtle said came back to her. "Chase me out of my bathroom," she thought. "I don't think I've ever seen Myrtle outside of the second floor girls bathroom before. Who could have chased her away from there?" Curiosity hurried Ginny along the corridors as she headed for the second floor.

***

Ron braced himself. The trials he was about to face would test the mettle of even the grimmest Auror. He would need all of his wits about him to come out of this unscathed. Taking a few deep breaths to clear his mind, he casually opened the door of his dormitory room.

Harry, Dean, and Neville looked up from their various activities to stare at him wordlessly as he entered the room for the first time in two weeks. Harry smiled and went back to reading his book, but Neville and Dean exchanged sly looks. Ron had almost reached the hangings of his four poster when Dean asked in a dry tone "So, are you just here to pick something up, or did she finally wise up and chuck you out?"

"You know Dean, it's going to be really hard for you to take your NEWT's with a kumquat growing out of your nose," Ron said as coolly as he could while his ears glowed red.

"Yeah, she chucked him out," Dean said to Neville. "Welcome back to Earth, Ron."

"Well, at least he beat the odds," Neville smiled. "Most people lost their bets after the third day."

"Yeah, I thought she was supposed to be the smartest girl in the year," Dean shrugged. "I guess that title is gone."

"Don't be jealous, Dean," Ron said, as he opened the night curtains of his bed. "With your stunning record with the lades, I'm sure everyone will be listening to what you have to say about my love life." He stiffly climbed up onto the counterpane. It seemed just the same as it had weeks ago except for the "This space for let" sign taped to the headboard. The handwriting looked suspiciously like Harry's. Ron took a moment to glare at the dark-haired figure shaking with laughter behind the Charms text book before he closed his curtains.

He changed into his pajamas and shifted under the fabric. They felt uncomfortable after he had been sleeping without them for so long. Ron lay there as one by one the lights of the room were extinguished. The now familiar feeling of longing came over him as he ran his hand over the side of the bed where he wished Hermione could be. No one to flirt with or tease. No one for him to solace or to be comforted by. And no stunningly beautiful woman to hold as he slept. He cursed silently to himself as he realized it was going to be a long night.

***

Ginny arrived on the second floor, unsure whether she was being cautious about an unusual occurrence, or just nosy. When she pushed open the bathroom door, she definitely heard moans, but not the kind that were usually associated with the melancholy spirit that lived here. "Oh no!" Ginny thought. Embarrassed beyond words she shut the door quickly and moved toward the hall.

Before Ginny could escape Lavender's head poked through a crack in the doorway. "Ginny," she whispered "Wait, I need to talk to you. Please wait!"

Ginny grimaced, but stopped. The light from the hall must have given her away. She waited for a minute until a rumpled and embarrassed Lavender emerged from the bathroom. "Are you crazy?" Ginny said in a quiet tone. "You didn't even lock the door."

"It's OK, no one ever goes in there," Lavender said quietly.

"Unless they find Moaning Myrtle wandering the halls and wonder why she isn't in her bathroom," Ginny said, smiling at her in a bemused way.

The door creaked again, and Seamus emerged slowly from the darkened bathroom. Ashen faced with a look of terror in his eyes, he hugged the wall like a man facing a firing squad.

Ginny glowered at him before turning back to Lavender.

"Oh, Moaning Myrtle, good point," Lavender said, after thinking for a second. "But Ginny, you can't tell Parvati! Please? It was my idea that we both dump Seamus." She seemed almost hysterical. "I meant to do it, but..."

"But things just sort of happened," Ginny finished the thought for her. "Sure, Lavender, you know I can keep a secret," Ginny sighed.

"Thanks!" Lavender released her tension with a sigh. "I owe you one."

"Good," Ginny said. "Because I need to ask a favor."

"I'll just...," Seamus started to say with a jaunty air until he caught the withering look from Ginny. "... be back in the common room," he finished in a small voice and slunk down the hall as fast as he dared.

Lavender smiled at him anyway before turning to Ginny "What do you need?" she said, still watching Seamus' bottom as he walked down the hall.

Ginny felt her face grow warm with embarrassment. "Well, I was planing a little romantic meeting myself."

Lavender looked back at her with a startled expression. "You and Harry?" she asked, beaming. Ginny nodded. "Oooh, the great and noble paladin of the scar is finally going to fall," Lavender cooed, bouncing on her heels.

"It's going to be kind of a surprise and I need a suitable outfit." Ginny smiled, getting caught up in the enthusiasm.

"That's even better. When is it?" Lavender asked conspiratorially

"Next Friday night when all the NEWT's are finished. Parvati is going to help me with my hair and Dobby's bringing food to our meeting place." Ginny checked off her plans on her fingers.

"Perfect. We can make an event out of getting you ready. Potter doesn't stand a chance."

***

"No!" Hermione said for what felt like the hundredth time, as she sat behind her dresser brushing her hair

"Come on, just a few details," Parvati pleaded as she sat next to her. "How does he kiss?"

"With his lips," Hermione replied dryly as the door opened behind them.

Lavender walked in and gasped in surprise. "Hermione, you're back."

"Deductive powers like that should come in handy during your Defense Against the Dark Arts exam," Hermione quipped, still brushing her hair.

"Our esteemed Head Girl is keeping mum about her exploits," Parvati hissed in annoyance, leaning back with her arms crossed.

"Nooo way!" Lavender gasped in total disbelief as she rushed up to sit on Hermione's other side. "You can't go off on a two week honeymoon and then come back like nothing happened."

Hermione glanced out of the corner of her eye, smiled, put down her hair brush and headed for bed.

Lavender and Parvati exchanged looks for a moment before Parvati sighed "I guess poor Ginny isn't going to get any advice from Hermione before her big night."

Hermione froze just as she was getting into bed. "It's a shame, it really sounds like she could use some guidance," Lavender purred with a wicked smile.

Hermione turned to face them. Ginny had been acting strange the past few days. If she were up to something dangerous it would be better to know about it now. Hermione weighed the cost of her embarrassment with the possible value of their information. "All right, what do you want to know?" she sighed in resignation. "But I can't tell you where we've been, that's not my secret to give."

"How did it happen?" Lavender gasped. "You and Ron have been dancing around each other for years."

Hermione sat on the edge of her bed facing her dorm mates. "Well Ron and I were on this date when I got a letter from Viktor ..."

An hour or so later Lavender and Parvati were listening with their mouths open as Hermione finished her story. "...and we just slipped into the castle for breakfast."

"A Hogwarts Head Girl going off into the forest starkers except for a cloak. That's amazing!" Parvati gasped.

"Brilliant!" Lavender added.

Hermione smiled in spite of herself as the three of them headed for bed. "So, what's all this about Ginny?"

"Oh that," Lavender said in an offhand way "Ginny's going to jump Harry next week, not all that unexpected, to tell you the truth."

"There's another one that's been a long time coming," Parvati smiled, turning out the light. Her smile faded as she thought for a moment. "I guess she wants to catch him before he goes off to war. I can't say as I blame her with, you know,...everything."

"Of course, Ginny would know that Harry is becoming an Auror." Hermione thought. "She's probably even more upset than I am. I should have been there for her." A fresh wave of worry and guilt over came her as she settled into her bed.

Her bed. Even though this was the same bed she had slept in for seven years it now seemed huge to her. She bit her lower lip and turned to face the place where Ron was supposed to be. She ran her hand over the empty space and wondered how she had ever slept like this before. No warm body to cling to, no comforting sound of breathing, no certainty that this was where she belonged. Dread filled her as she curled into a sad and lonely ball. "What if I am forced to sleep like this forever?"

***

When Ginny got back to the common room she found Seamus alone by the fire. She sat down in the chair across from him and glared the way her mother taught her. "Rat!" she finally said, relishing the way the word rolled so easily off her tongue.

"I know, I know," he mumbled, looking at the hearth rug.

"Overgrown. Irish. Wharf. Rat," Ginny elaborated. "No, I take that back. Dead overgrown Irish wharf rat." Seamus grimaced as her words. "It's only a matter of time, you know."

"Yes, I know," Seamus held his head in his hands "They're both just so... I can't help it."

"Try!" Ginny hissed slowly, her breath lowering the temperature in the room twenty degrees. "It's not just you, your life is forfeit anyway. But Lavender and Parvati have been friends for seven years. They promised each other they wouldn't see you again. When this blows up, like you know it will, they could end up leaving school not speaking to each other."

The look of comprehension and concern on his face was unmistakable. "What should I do?" he said in a desperate voice.

"Fix it," Ginny said, getting up and walking toward the girls dormitory. "Soon."

***

Next: Part 5. Loose Ends

***

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