Don't Laugh at Draco

A few days before the end of his sixth year, that old bat Trelawney had her third true vision. Her little sycophant Parvati Patil had been with her at the time, and news of the prophecy spread through the school like wildfire. Dumbledore quickly silenced Patil and everyone she had told about the prediction, but the rumors still insisted that the vision concerned Dumbledore's little pet, the Famous Harry Potter.

When he got home, it was his mother's sole topic of conversation. Did he know the specifics of the vision? Did he realize how badly the Dark Lord wanted that prophecy? Did he understand that it was now up to him to restore the Malfoys to the fame and riches they had held before his father's arrest? To shut his mother up, Draco promised that the Dark Lord would receive that prophecy and that it would come from his hands.

It took the entire summer to brew a polyjuice potion, but Draco didn't care. Thanks to his efforts, a Malfoy would once again sit at Voldemort's right hand... regardless of whether the Dark Lord affected his father's rescue or not. All he needed to do was impersonate someone close to Patil and get her to confide in her "friend." And luckily for him, Patil's closest friend was a dimwitted girl who had had a crush on him for years.

Draco put his plan into action the moment he boarded the Hogwarts' Express. The Malfoys may have lost their wealth and power, but Draco was still intelligent, handsome, and--when he put his mind to it--charming. A few hours of flirting with Lavender Brown, and the silly chit was quite willing to follow him into the train's loo. They snogged, they petted, and Draco acquired all the hair he needed to complete his transformation. Lavender secured a vague promise to get together again some time in the future. They both left happy.

Skipping the Sorting ceremony, Draco grabbed a hand-held mirror, found an empty classroom, and quickly finished up his potion. He drank it down and transformed into... a rabbit. A fucking bunny. That bitch Brown must been close to a rabbit sometime today and gotten the rodent's fur on her. And he, idiot that he was, had just drunk it.

He stared at his reflection morosely. His face was largely untouched, but a pinkish white fur covered the rest of his body. He had two large, floppy ears on top of his head and a big, round, cottonball tail where his arse should be. He'd had plans for his arse that night...

Shaking away his errant thoughts, he concentrated upon his current dilemma. The Dark Lord had no patience for failures. Draco didn't deceive himself into believing that Voldemort would forgive this cock-up... assuming he heard about it. If Draco could reach Madam Pomfrey without being seen, he would be fine.

So of course, he ran straight into Potter and his precious little Mudblood.

"Look, Harry, it's Little Bunny Foo-Foo!"

Draco didn't get the reference, but Potter obviously did because he burst into laughter. Trying to maintain his dignity, Draco ground out, "Out of my way, Granger!"

"Sure thing," Potter answered. "Just make sure you stay out of Mr. MacGregor's garden."

Draco stalked away, to the sound of laughter and some stupid song that he tried, unsuccessfully, to ignore.

As he lay in bed that night, Draco thought about the events that had led him there. Having visibly and spectacularly failed the Dark Lord, Draco wondered whether his best bet might not be to switch sides. If he appealed to the headmaster, Dumbledore would protect him... providing he humbled himself enough. The very idea rankled, but it might be the best thing for the Malfoy family in the long run.

And yet, he couldn't forget that ridiculous song about Peter Cottontail hopping down the bunny trail. Remembering that evening's humiliation strengthened his resolve. He would find out about that prophecy, and he would bring Potter down. He still had some potion left. He would simply get hair from another part of Lavender's anatomy, one that never came into contact with a non-human (unless she was much kinkier than she seemed).

He wouldn't do this for the Dark Lord, or his father, or even for the Malfoy name. He would succeed for himself, because Draco Malfoy was not someone to be laughed at, whether he was a giant bunny or not. Potter would learn that soon enough. They all would.

THE END