Issues

Chapter 13. Issues of Exposure.

"I think you should tell Ron and the others about Draco," Hermione whispered to Harry later that day before dinner.

They'd spent another fruitless day searching for the diary and he'd reluctantly left a despondent Draco in the cell, alone, while he returned to the Burrow for dinner and company.

"That way, when they get over yelling at you for taking such a risk, you might be able to sneak Draco in here for some decent food and someone to talk to. There's none here that would treat him badly. Bill's rarely here, Molly would love another person to mother and Draco needs some mothering," she finished and then laughed. "I never thought I'd hear myself say that Draco Malfoy needed some pampering. What has the world come to?"

Harry laughed, too; it really was ironic. And Hermione was more right than she knew. Harry could feel how Draco cried out for some human contact - nurturing contact, not contact designed to abuse or manipulate or humiliate. It could also explain this crush Draco seemed to have on him.

"Yes, I think you're right," he said. "I'll mention it over dinner."

"Hey what are you two whispering about over there?" Ron asked. "You're not trying to steal my girl are you?"

"I might be, you never know," Harry said, grinning cheekily.

Hermione thumped his arm, though not hard. "Harry, you're like my brother!"

"Oh, so I should steal Ron then, should I?" Harry joked back.

"Well if redheads are your type," Ron said preening and joining in the joke.

"Thought you didn't like that sort of stuff," Harry said, looking at Ron with a question in his expression.

"Hermione got to me there, too," admitted Ron, blushing. "Long as you don't fancy me, what do I care who you, er, want," he finished awkwardly.

"Ron," Harry started, shaking his head, perplexed. "I have no idea why you still think I'm gay."

"Well," Ron started, stumbling and looking guiltily at Hermione. "I don't, not really, but I mean if you were, then I'd not have a problem with it."

Hermione smiled at him and Harry just stared at both of them. It hadn't escaped his notice that he hadn't denied it this time. But, no, he didn't think he was gay; he liked girls. He liked the way they looked and their soft curves and secret warm places. Then again, Draco's quite obvious devotion was growing on him more and more each day. And when he took the time to think about Draco, the expressions he saw on him these days were much more attractive than the haughty sneers of the younger Draco.

"Right, well, thanks, Ron," Harry finally said. Molly saved any further awkwardness by calling them for dinner. Relieved, Harry quickly stood and headed to the table.

***

Dinner and the revelation went about as expected. Most everyone argued with Harry and disputed his decision making skills. Hermione stepped in and played peacemaker by adding her support to Harry's actions, though not without admonishing him first for not taking proper precautions the first time he'd had Draco out of the cell.

After dinner, Harry contacted Kingsley through the new communication devices the twins had presented them with. Harry rather thought that he didn't need a communication device to be able to hear Kingsley yelling. He would only have to stick his head outside and he'd be able to hear him all the way from the Ministry.

"Your name is only going to get you so much lenience, Harry," Kingsley warned after he'd calmed down a little. "My job is already on the line here; I'm walking a damned tightrope as it is. I shouldn't know about this, you're undermining my authority and showing no respect for the Ministry at all. I'm really disappointed in you."

That hurt Harry more than anything; more than the yelling and more than the distrust of his judgment - this was Kingsley feeling let down for trusting Harry's judgment. He hung his head.

"Your own head is going on the block for this one, Harry. If anything goes wrong, and I mean anything, you personally are taking the responsibility for it."

Harry rushed to nod in agreement. "Of course. I always did accept the responsibility."

Shaking his head, Kingsley sighed. "I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I'll put a couple of Aurors on his watch that I know have no love for the Ministry. They at least might be able to give you some warning if things are about to go terribly wrong."

"Thank you, Kingsley." It was more than he could ever have hoped for. They'd still need the Glamours and the heavy wards, but if things did start to deteriorate, he would be warned and maybe have time to get Draco back into the cell.

"Don't let me down, again, Harry," he warned. Harry nodded.

"I won't, I promise."

"And you tell that Malfoy that if he puts a foot out of line, I'll send him to Azkaban myself."

Harry didn't need to hear "and you can both share a cell" to know it was implied if anything went wrong.

***

"So, you're heading out to Hogwarts tomorrow?" Ron asked later, sitting himself down on the couch beside Harry and handing him a cup of tea. Harry nodded.

"Don't worry, I think Tonks and Bill are on guard duty," Harry said, recalling the schedule they'd organised. "The Board of Governors has decided to hold everyone back a year seeing how disrupted by the war their education has been, so they're announcing it tomorrow at the school. They've appointed Professor McGonagall as headmistress, did you know that?"

Ron nodded. "Dad mentioned it. He's got a seat on the Board this year. I think they decided that there had been that many Weasleys go through the school it was about time we had a say," said Ron, laughing.

"Well you'll have one more year there and Ginny, two, so there'll be a Weasley there for a couple more years."

"It will be weird going back there, though, mate," Ron said. "But Hermione will go spare if I don't go back and finish my schooling."

"I'm kind of looking forward to it, to be honest."

"How so?" Ron asked, curious.

"To escape from all this...crap. I'd rather just go back to being 'Harry'."

"Well, first we have to deal with this latest crap," Ron answered, shaking his head. "You really do have a saving people thing, don't you?" There was a smile on his face as he said it, though, and Harry shrugged.

"I think they just find me somehow," he said. "But I must be the best person I know at making mortal enemies - the kind that want to kill me, anyway."

"It's the scar, mate," Ron replied seriously, and then broke out laughing. Harry joined in, wondering when was the last time he'd really laughed. "So, just another day in the office - change the law, take out the bad guy and save the damsel in distress. No big deal, no pressure or anything, mate."

Harry laughed. "Draco's a damsel in distress? I'm sure he'd love to hear you say that."

"Ahh, it's just a saying," Ron said elbowing Harry in the ribs. "Besides, he is a poncy little ferret, isn't he? And Hermione tells me he has the hots for you."

Harry gaped. Ron continued. "She told me when she came back this afternoon. Right before she got on my back about he whole gay thing." Ron scratched the back of his neck, which he was wont to do when nervous. "She reckons that it was obvious he really likes you and that we shouldn't be surprised if you like him back."

Harry thought Hermione deserved a medal if she'd managed to talk Ron through his homophobic tendencies so quickly. Although she probably had evil dastardly methods that he'd really prefer not to know about, to get her way. "And what would you think if I did? I'm not saying I do, but if I did?"

Ron looked uncomfortable. "Mostly, I'd think you needed your head read, but in the interests of friendship, I'd adjust. I'd trust you to know what you're doing, after I had Hermione check you for every hex and curse and love potion known to man, and I'd adjust."

Harry inclined his head acknowledging the comment. "To be honest, I don't know what I think, right now." Harry took off his glasses and ran a hand over his face, tired. "He's been through so much, it's not surprising that he has changed. And Hermione's right, he does have some sort of crush on me, but I reckon it's just because I'm helping him and he's not had any, um, nice human contact in a long while." That was as specific as he could get without betraying anything Draco told him in confidence. "So, I never thought I'd even consider my preferences. I always just assumed I was straight, but I can't say I'd be worried if I was attracted to a male."

"But Malfoy?" There was honest curiosity in Ron's voice, accompanied by a faint disbelief.

Harry shrugged. "I don't know. I've not felt the urge to throw him down on the floor and shag him or anything, but there have been times when...there's been...something there that's made me think I might be attracted to him." There, that was out. Harry sighed, as it was something he'd barely even admitted to thinking about and now he'd blabbed it to Ron of all people.

Ron groaned. "You need your head read, mate," he protested, shaking his head. "You're sure it's not just pity or something because he's in the spot he's in? Like you rescued Ginny and dated her."

"I also rescued your dad and I never wanted to date him!"

Harry laughed at the look of disgust on Ron's face. "I also rescued you and Hermione and I never wanted to date either of you."

"But that's different. We're your best friends."

"Best friends don't fall for each other? Happens all the time." Harry teased and grinned widely when Ron looked at him, horrified.

"You didn't...?"

"No, of course not. But look at you and Hermione."

It was fun teasing Ron, his facial expressions cracked Harry up all the time.

"Bastard," Ron groused and poked him in the ribs again. "Malfoy, huh?" he sighed and slumped back on the couch.

"Dunno, maybe," admitted Harry.

'Think he'll go back and finish his schooling?"

" I hope so. That's assuming we can keep him out of Azkaban and sane."

"You will, mate," Ron said confidently. "I know you and you won't rest until he's safe."

God, it was good to talk to his best friend like this. It felt like so long since they'd had the chance to just relax and chat. And the unquestioned loyalty was something that, if he were honest with himself, really gave him confidence when it came from Ron. It also came with the feeling of responsibility to live up to that loyalty, too, which Harry supposed made it kind of a circular thing. And it was different with Ron than with anyone else expecting things from him. Ron was his best friend, his first friend and that made everything Ron said or did or thought about Harry, have just that much more impact than with anyone else.

"Maybe he could come here tomorrow, for dinner," Harry wondered aloud. "Do you think your mum would mind? I think he really needs contact; really needs people to be nice to him."

"I'm sure she won't mind, mate," Ron replied and got up to go and ask. It seemed to be the cue for Hermione to sit down beside him.

"I have a bit of a bone to pick with you, Hermione Jane Granger," Harry said, playfully.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, where did you get the idea I might be gay? I'm quite sure I never mentioned even doubting my preferences, let alone admitting anything like that."

Hermione looked mysterious for a moment, a 'wouldn't you like to know' look on her face. Then she smiled. "No reason, really. I just saw you two together today and there's a closeness there, some sort of bond between you that's obvious to anyone who knows both of you."

"You don't think that could be because he's confided in me about things that happened to him during the war and he's relying on me to get him out of there?"

Hermione shook her head. "No, there's a gentleness about you when you're dealing with him. You treat him like he's precious, like he'll break if you push him too far."

Harry just stared at her for the longest moment, thinking. If that were true, then maybe subconsciously he'd already discovered that he did have some sort of feelings for Draco. He wondered if they were pity or something deeper. "That could be pity. He's been through a lot," Harry replied, finally.

"I don't think so. You don't do pity very well. Sympathy, yes, empathy also, but not pity."

"And this gave you the idea I might be gay?" Harry still found it hard to connect the two.

"Maybe not gay, but you definitely feel something for Draco that goes beyond the enmity you had in school, beyond a simple truce and, I think, beyond a friendship. You don't speak to Ron and I the same way as you speak to him."

Harry sighed. If it were true, then why was he so damned obvious to everyone else and yet it completely slipped past him?

"I don't know what I feel for him. You're right, it's different than with you and Ron, but I don't know what it is. Maybe I just feel sorry for him." And maybe he was not prepared to admit that there could be something there and have Draco throw it back in his face and tell him he was acting all along. Not that he really thought Draco was still acting, but the niggling worry was always there and perhaps that was what was stopping him from accepting that maybe he could like Draco back.

Hermione patted his knee. "I'm sure you'll figure it out."

Ron dropped back into his seat again, then and advised them that Molly was looking forward to another mouth to feed tomorrow night.

***

Hogwarts looked the same as the last time he'd seen it. He spent some time thanking all the deities that the final battle had chosen another castle in which to occur and that the one place he'd really felt at home was still standing much as it always had. It appeared impenetrable and perpetually able to repel any attack, exuding an atmosphere of calm and peace and permanence.

The Great Hall looked fabulous. Someone, probably the staff, had taken great pains to decorate the Hall like a classroom. There were shelves of books lining some of the walls, huge blackboards interspersed between them covered with magically enchanted chalk writing lessons. The tables and bench seats were transfigured into desks and chairs and up at the front of the room the Head Table was decorated with numerous school awards that flashed and sang and even danced on the table.

They made Harry smile as he remembered Ron speaking about having to clean one that abused his polishing skills, way back in second year.

Professor McGonagall spotted him and motioned him over, greeting him with her usual formal manner. "Mr. Potter, it's good to see you," she said, and Harry could see her eyes smiling, though it wouldn't do for anyone to think the Professor was anything but dour and strict. Harry was lucky and knew her better than most of the students that had passed through Hogwarts as they'd fought together in the Order for so long.

"Professor," Harry responded affectionately, shaking her hand. "Thank you, it's good to see you, too. This is a big day for Hogwarts."

"It is indeed, and I shall expect you and Mr. Weasley to apply yourself to your studies when you arrive. You will have to set a good example to all students."

Harry felt like he was back in school already. He grinned, though, knowing that he'd get no special treatment from her, thankfully. Now he couldn't wait to come back here in September, assuming he completed his 'mission' before then.

"I plan, to, Professor," he said. "What provisions have you made for returning children of Death Eaters?" he asked.

"They will, of course, be welcomed the same as any other children. I'm surprised you had to ask that of me."

She did look a little put out and Harry grimaced. Yes, he should have known that she was cut from the same cloth as Professor Dumbledore.

"Sorry," he said, shamefaced. "Not everyone is being so...fair."

"Narrow minded fools and bigots," she snapped. "I'm quite well aware of that, but here at Hogwarts, any child that requires an education is welcome. The children are not their parents."

"I agree." Harry nodded.

"Then I can count on you to help promote tolerance between the Houses?"

"Of course." Which might be easier than she thought, Harry added to himself. Once Draco was free, he was hoping that he'd come back to Hogwarts, too, and peace between the two great rivals would go a long way to furthering peace between the houses.

"Well done, Harry," She finally smiled at him, before being called away to start proceedings.

Harry sat at the Head table and looked down at the assembled reporters, onlookers, school Governors and the occasional Ministry official. He spotted Tonks and Bill at the rear, one on each side of the Hall, calmly surveying the crowd, serious and watchful. And of course, there was Rufus Scrimgeour standing up in front of the assemblage and speaking. His security were at the ends of the Head table, also watchful and stern. Harry let his mind drift away as the official speeches were made, feeling lucky he didn't have to make a speech this time, just show his face. They were basically a repeat of previous ones, where the Minister promised to revamp the Ministry and build the Wizarding World back to its former glory. He didn't doubt that these types of speeches were what was needed right now in order to restore the confidence in an efficient Ministry, but it was very easy to drift away when you'd heard it all before, and had better things to think about than Rufus Scrimgeour.

Later he promised himself that in the future he'd make sure he was respectful enough to pay attention to what was going on around him, because if he had been, then he might have been aware that a wizard right near the back of the room had raised his wand and fired off a curse. One he didn't hear, seeing that both Bill and Tonks were yelling for him to either watch out or get down.

As it was, it was only the split second warning he heard and reflexes honed during the war, which enabled him to duck far enough to the right to allow the spell to pass his head harmlessly and hit the back wall instead.

Among the screams in the aftermath, and the uproar of Scrimgeour's security diving on the Minister to push him to the ground, then standing around him, wands drawn, Harry had the presence of mind to keep an eye on Tonks whose hair was a flaming blue and easily spotted in the crowd. She was skirting around the side of the Hall to reach the doors. As he found out afterwards, whoever it was, and he was positive it was Coghill, escaped out the doors and down a corridor somewhere and by the time Bill and Tonks managed to meet up, half the hall decided it was time to leave and created a mini-panic to get to the door, so he was long gone.

When Tonks returned breathless and frustrated, she advised she'd run to the gates as soon as she was free of the crowd, but it was too late.

"I'm so sorry, Harry, we should have seen him earlier," she panted as she dropped onto a chair beside him.

"He didn't look like himself from what I could gather, so it's not your fault. Besides, the warning you did give me probably saved my life, so I have to thank both of you."

"It's our job." Tonks shrugged and looked towards Bill who was dealing with Scrimgeour's staff.

"Even so," Harry started, but then he watched as Bill nodded at a wizard, shrugged his shoulders and gave him a wry grimace, before making his way back to them.

"Scrimgeour's lot think that the attempt was on his life," Bill said, amused. "I tried to explain about Coghill, but they're under the impression that Coghill is not the culprit here."

"Did you tell them that the curse passed not an inch from my head?" Harry asked.

"Yeah," Bill replied. "They seem to think that he was just a bad aim. It fits in with their theory of whoever it was being after Scrimgeour."

"That's a bit short-sighted," said Tonks, disgusted.

"I suppose they think that everyone loves Harry; why would anyone want to kill him?" Bill suggested.

"I can see why they would think that. We've hardly taken the Ministry into our confidence. Scrimgeour wouldn't think Coghill would try to get revenge on me for having him reassigned. I bet they don't even know he's missing from duty, yet."

"Point, Harry," agreed Tonks. "They're going to probably be after you themselves tomorrow."

"Hmm, perhaps we can use this attempt today to get me out of any more public appearances," Harry said. "We can say that we're concerned for my safety and when they have apprehended the person responsible for the attempt on the Minister's life then I'll resume my public duties."

"It will make you look like you're afraid of people, though," Bill said after thinking about it.

"But won't that help us by lulling Coghill into a false sense of security? And maybe next time he won't be as well prepared or he'll be more ready to take a silly risk, thinking me afraid of him."

"I must admit, you don't look too scared right now, Harry," said Bill, giving him a long assessing look.

"Don't they say 'familiarity breeds contempt'? Not quite the analogy I was looking for, but it's happened to me so many times, maybe I am getting used to it."

Tonks frowned at him. "Don't you dare get lazy about vigilance, Harry."

"I won't," he promised, chastened.

"See that you don't!"

Most of the crowd had left the Hall, now. Harry felt sorry for Professor McGonagall's announcement day being marred by an attack on his life. Where the focus should have been on the future and rebuilding; it had become the platform for violence to once more raise its ugly head. Harry had little doubt that the school reopening in September would have modest coverage in the newspapers tomorrow. Rather, the story about the 'attempted assassination' of the Minster would cover all the front pages. He wondered how it would affect Sully's story that was supposed to be in the Freedom Press tomorrow.

"Anyway, did you get a look at him?" Harry changed the subject back to Coghill.

"Not really. He seems to be good at choosing non-descript people to Polyjuice into," Bill replied. "I gave Scrimgeour's Auror team a description, but it's not likely to help, seeing as he won't stay like that, will he?"

Harry shook his head. "We'll just have to let him think he's scared me off and hope he tries something in a setting a bit more conducive to a fair fight. Tonks, will you tell the Minister that I'll be doing no more public appearances until the perpetrator is caught?"

"Yes. I'll do that now, while they're still here," she replied and stood, walking over to the Auror team and only tripping over the hem of her robes once.

"I'm going to head back to Spinner's End," Harry said.

"Well, you'll Floo from here rather than walk to the gates to Apparate," Bill insisted. "I'm not taking the risk that he's still out there, and I'm sure Minerva won't mind you using her Floo."

He could have argued, but there was no reason to take unnecessary risks with his safety, now, was there? He nodded and stood. "That's probably best."

"I'm going to catch up with Kingsley and go through Coghill's file, talk to his neighbours, see if there's any leads to where he might be. I want to catch this bastard and get him off the streets."

Harry looked at Bill when he heard the hard tone in his voice. Bill, on glancing up, caught Harry's look and gave him a tight smile. "Because you're right, Harry, it has to stop somewhere. I can't say I didn't feel some satisfaction when I heard that Malfoy had been beaten up, but then I realised that he's not the real culprit. Greyback is the one who did this to me, not Malfoy. Greyback is dead and I guess I was looking for someone to take my anger out on. That doesn't mean I want Malfoy to get off scott free, but if his year was as hard as you said, then maybe that's punishment enough."

"More than," Harry said quietly.

***

When he arrived at Spinner's End, he found Hermione going through Snape's kitchen area, searching drawers and cupboards and testing for magical hiding places. Draco was searching Snape's Potions lab, or so Hermione told him.

Harry quickly bought her up to date with what had happened at the function and worry lined her face.

"He's getting awfully close, Harry," she said. "And he seems to be one step ahead of us all the time."

"I don't know, it seems rather ad-hoc to me. He waits until I'm in public and has a half-hearted attempt at cursing me. That's not too clever, really."

Hermione frowned thoughtfully. "Maybe you're right, but I don't like that we can't seem to catch him."

"Well, if I'm not doing any more public appearances, he'll think I'm scared and he'll make a stupid move and when he does we'll catch him."

"I'm just afraid we won't catch him in time, though," she said doubtfully.

"I'll be fine," he replied, rubbing her shoulder. "I'm off upstairs to see how he's going. Do you want to get some lunch? I would have bought some, but Bill bundled me into the Floo at Hogwarts and made me come straight here."

"Only for you," she said, narrowing her eyes playfully. "You behave yourself while I'm gone."

"Always." Harry grinned at her disbelieving look.

He was still grinning a few moments later when he walked into the Potions lab and found Draco stretched out on the floor, a pile of books beside him and an open one in front of him.

"Found anything interesting?" he asked.

Draco looked up, startled, obviously not having heard Harry walk up the stairs. Then he gave Harry a smile that stopped his heart for a second; he was sure of it. And Harry could not remember having seen a smile quite like that on Draco's face, ever before.

"Harry," Draco exclaimed, that smile still ripping holes in Harry's chest. A smile that quickly turned into a frown of concern because Harry just stood there staring at him. "What's wrong?" he jumped up to his feet and moved quickly to his side and Harry was unable to take his eyes off him.

Some questions had definitely been answered right there in his response to a simple smile. How ridiculous! He'd never had a reaction like that to a smile before. Blushing, he managed to respond to Draco.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm fine," he said, and was amazed that his voice sounded so normal. He coughed and dragged his eyes away and back to the books. "Hermione's gone to get lunch," he said. "What are you going through?"

Draco turned and looked back at the books. "They're Severus' Potions diaries. None of them look like the one I saw him writing in, but then I figured that he might have altered the cover or something, so I'm checking them to see."

"Good idea," Harry said, grinning at him, a little ball of hope flaring back to life. "No luck though?"

"Silly question, Harry," Draco shook his head. "Do you think if I'd found the diary I'd be this calm?"

"Sorry, you're right," he said. "It was a dumb question."

Draco grabbed his wrist and dragged him over to the pile of books. "Here, sit and help me until Granger comes back. And you can tell me about your morning."

"I've never heard of Potions diaries before," Harry said as he sat down next to Draco and picked up one of the black leather bound books.

"Most Potions masters use them to keep a record of difficult potions, notes on ways to do things better, experimental potions, that sort of thing," Draco said. "Severus was always experimenting with new potions, I'm fairly sure he tried a few different things when looking for a way to help you, too."

There were several books on the floor, perhaps twenty or so and they all looked the same. There didn't appear to be any distinguishing marks on any of them. When he looked inside, he recognised the cramped spiky handwriting from the potions book he'd used in his sixth year at Hogwarts.

"Tell me about your morning," Draco said.

So, Harry did, mentioning how Professor McGonagall was expecting him to come back to Hogwarts this year. Draco rolled his eyes, but Harry could tell he was moved, by the suspicious brightness in them.

Draco wasn't so reticent about showing his feelings when Harry recounted the attack on his life.

"This has gone too far, Harry. I really don't like you risking your life for me," he said, worry creasing his brow.

"There's not a lot I can do about it, now, Draco," Harry replied and Draco sagged against Harry's shoulder. Harry let him rest his head there.

"I know."

"Look, let's not talk about that, let's just find that damned diary and get you sorted, then we can worry about the other stuff."

"One thing at a time?" Draco asked.

Harry nodded.

Draco sighed and moved, dropping down to lie on his back and resting his head on Harry's knee. He picked up a book and began to read through it, so Harry went back to reading the one he'd chosen, determined not to feel self-conscious that Draco's head was on his knee. While they read, they talked about the rest of the morning's events, too.

Ten minutes later, when Hermione returned with lunch, Harry was stunned to find that his hand was stroking Draco's hair.