Severus Snape’s Potions Mistake Shock

Love and Peace…


Chapter Four: The Love Letter



Life had certainly changed since Professor Teyah had come into the picture. At dinner, instead of the usual Potter Gryffindor gang hanging out together, Harry would sit down anywhere at the table and babble on to anyone willing to listen about what he’d learned in Potions. Unfortunately, what he’d ‘learned’ had little to do with wizardry, and more to do with...well, I’m sure you can guess what Harry was trying to find out. Ron and even Hermione would argue very loudly to Fred and George about some thing to do with Quidditch, even though Hermione took little true interest in the sport – there was always something more interesting and less revolting than Professor Teyah’s speculative turn-ons according to Harry Potter.

Draco on the other hand was spending more and more time in the library. Much to the amusement of his fellow Slytherins, he’d taken a decided interest in romance novels, and spent hours a day in the library, reading away and scribbling on a little piece of parchment that he allowed nobody to see. Naturally, there were a good bunch of rumors springing up around that too.

It wasn’t until next Monday’s Double Potions that the proverbial crap really hit the fan with Severus. After receiving yet another love letter that went on-and-on in such a soppy and perverse fashion that it would have made that Fabio Muggle turn red in the face to hear it read aloud, the Professor decided to get to the bottom of this. In every class he had, he threatened the students (even the first years) with “‘Professor Snape’ taking 75 points from the house who harbours this malevolent, perverted little miscreant.”

Naturally, after that one, nobody owned up – everyone was afraid of the probably infinite number of kinds of holy hell that Snape could inflict upon the perpetrator.

Harry however was livid. “Someone was writing perverted notes to my GIRL!” he howled. Ron looked around for a window he might jump out of, but it was Hermione who had the solution. She waved her wand in a mighty arc, and pointed it straight at Harry, while yelling “Silencia” at the top of her lungs.

It took Harry a few moments to realize that he was moving his mouth, but no sound came out.

“Listen to me Harry!” Hermione was still incensed enough to yell. “She is NOT your Girlfriend. She is Professor Snape’s girlfriend. Why Professor Snape has a girlfriend at ALL is beyond my ability to comprehend, but you should feel lucky that for once, YOU are not the one who is about to get us all into trouble here.” Having finished her tirade, her voice softened. “Do you understand me?”

Mutely, as he could not do anything else, Harry nodded.

“Can I take the hex off now?”

Another nod.

“And we’re not going to hear anymore about this?”

Vigorous nodding.

“Good boy.” Hermione waved her wand and lived the hex. Harry coughed a few times, relieved to hear the sound of his own voice once more.

“Sorry about that Hermione, Ron,” he said, a little sheepishly. “Uh, I’m going back to my room for a few moments though. See you in Herbology in a few?”

The relief was evident in Hermione’s voice as she nodded. “Yes, see you then.”

As soon as Harry was out of earshot, an elated Ron did a pirouette right there in the middle of the hall. “WOW! You were amazing! You have saved my life! How can I ever repay you?” he said dramatically, grabbing Hermione in an unexpected hug.

“That’s easy!” Hermione was nicely surprised. “Don’t stop!”

Ron backed away a bit. “Uhhh…sorry.” He blushed.

“You’ll never get it will you?”

“Get what?”

“Never mind.”


Up in his room, Harry pulled out a piece of parchment. His friends just didn’t understand him...but that was all right, they had their own relationships. He checked the time- 15 minutes until Herbology. Just enough time to write a love letter to Professor Teyah. Let’s see…how would he start it?

It didn’t take him long. Unlike Draco, Harry was much more eloquent, and the love letter that he had written turned out to be extremely romantic, as opposed to lewd. There was only two things left to do…one was obvious – to make sure that the sender could not be figured out at all, and the other was to find a way to sign it. “HP” was too obvious, he was the only one with those initials in the school, and that would be a dead giveaway. Maybe just an “H” or a “P”? He was almost tempted to sign it “Draco Malfoy” and get him in deep trouble, but that would just be cruel...and besides, if Professor Snape had to take Draco’s word against his, Harry knew he would probably be ousted.

He was feeling rather clever when he signed it “A Potions Student” (in other words, just about anyone in the whole school made the big possibility list) and sent it off. It was a long dash to Herbology, and he slid in just under the wire... but it was all very worth it.



“Okay then...let’s finish up this letter...” Draco sat down in the chair in his room, cracked his knuckles loudly and grinned wolfishly with anticipation as he fished around in his robes for the latest letter from “H” to Professor Teyah. He was especially proud of this one, as he’d copied most of it out of this great novel he’d found in the library called “The Flame Spells Of Passion”. He wasn’t entirely sure what people found so fanciful about “restraining spells” or how anyone could find the words “heaving bosom” in any way romantic, but there it was, and it sounded like something you’d write in a letter to someone you loved...especially since the book used that particular word many different times, and in more ways than Draco could count. He’d also added an extra part about “making sweet love” – probably some kind of romance spell.

...but he couldn’t seem to find the letter. Frantically, he searched his other two robes; maybe he’d left them in there…no luck.

He’d dropped it… that was the only explanation. Big, BIG problem. He had to find it, and find it now!

Running back to the Potions classroom, where he’d started his day, he made a thorough search, but no luck. He combed the hallway all the way to DADA, and after that had a look through Herbology, scuffled through the Quidditch Pitch once or twice, and no luck in the library either. He was shaking badly as he returned to Slytherin to have another look through there. He’d not finished it or sealed it. What if Professor Teyah or Professor Snape was reading it right now. He was going to get resorted into Gryffindor or one of the other houses, because he’d never be allowed back into Slytherin. Or worse, he was going to be expelled for hitting on a Teacher.

Draco however was running on a bit more luck than he thought he had. While he had in fact dropped the letter, it had not been found by Professor Snape, or any of the other teachers of the school. Fate was about to play a hand, and change its allegiance. In other words, Draco was about to find himself proverbially flying through the air broomless, and though he knew it not, was destined to bounce a good number of times before he actually lay still for awhile.


It was Harry Potter who was whapped in the face with a slightly tattered piece of Parchment while practicing broom flying for Quidditch. He was about to go report things to Hooch, (litter was strictly prohibited on Hogwarts grounds because if it got stirred up and hit someone in the face while they were flying about on their broom, serious damage could be done) but ultimately decided against it when he realized that there was writing on the paper, and furthermore that he recognized the handwriting from somewhere. So he stuck it in his pocket. Maybe it was Ron or Hermione’s...he didn’t really want to get them into trouble.

Later that night in his room, Harry re-discovered the paper when he was looking for a new quill pen. It looked like a love letter…and it was addressed to Professor Teyah...and WOW, was it gross. Did Snape write this? Maybe Fred and George were right...maybe that potion HAD turned Professor Snape into a crazed sex maniac. That would certainly explain a letter like this.

He cast a spell on it, hoping that the sender had not yet been blocked. It hadn’t...but he did do a double take when the words on the page re-arranged themselves to inform him that this particular piece of filth had been written by Draco Malfoy.