Ad Mortem Festinamus

"And that's the next thing we're going to practise, dear. You're an appallingly bad liar."

"Lying is for cowards, isn't it?"

She sniggered. "There are loads of things you've got to learn, Severus Snape. For a start: Cowardice isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's much to be preferred to foolhardiness, for an instance. And there will come many situations when you don't want to let show what's really going on in your head. Take your feud with my horrible cousin, for example. You'd have so much more spare time, if you didn't always blurt out that you've cursed him and spent your evenings in detentions."

"He'd give me away anyway, and I don't want to give him the satisfaction of seeing me degrade myself and lie!"

"I appreciate your self-respect, but that attitude won't bring you anywhere, trust me. Listen closely, Severus, I believe I can teach you some very handy lessons." She winked at him. "Number One - know your enemy. In the case of my cousin, you could already know some helpful things like -"

"Like him being a total prat?"

"So much is obvious, isn't it. But please, mind your language, at least when you're talking to me. Anyhow, he is a Gryffindor, and maybe you haven't been long enough in this school yet to understand, but those folks have something like a code of honour. Sirius is an awful person, but one thing he's not - a traitor. It disagrees with his self-respect. He wouldn't incriminate you. So - let us say old Slughorn is the one to interview you on the case - what'd you do?"

He shrugged. "I don't know."

"For a start you have to appear genuine, no matter who's asking you. No guilt written all over your face, no pride, no contentment. You must look perfectly unconcerned, and of course, you have no idea what they're talking about until they tell you what's happened. Unless it's absolutely obvious. Mind you, it's not believable when you of all persons are informed that Sirius was hit by a curse and you appear like you were not gleeful. It's all about the right measure. Got me so far?"

"Yes -"

"Of course, this is all very obvious, you automatically do the same when you lie to your parents -"

"I never do."

She hesitated and frowned. "I beg your pardon? Omnis homo mendax, Severus! What are you, some sort of saint or something?!"

"My mother is too good a person to be lied to and as for my father - oh well. I've preferred defiance so far, you see?"

"Defiance? Why? Because he's a muggle?"

"Rather because he is a complete jerk - excuse the term, but he really is."

"I see... Well, so it means you've got to start from scratch, that's all."

"I'm sorry, but - do I really have to - well - learn this?"

She smiled slyly. "Mark my words, dear, but it can only be advantageous when it's up to your choice whether you tell someone the truth or not."

"True," a well-known voice said and Narcissa was quite proud that she didn't give a start. She looked up, as calm as ever, seeing Lucius Malfoy stand before them, casually leaning against a shelf. "Listen to her, Severus."

She didn't want to be backed up by Lucius Malfoy of all persons, not him, but what could she do? "Eavesdropping, are you?"

"That's a harsh accuse. Actually, I happened to search for Severus here. And when I saw you and heard that you're trying to teach him how to lie, it was just too interesting."

"Was it," she said tersely, every fibre of her body willing him to leave. Didn't she see enough of him already!

"It was. I wonder what you mean by it though -"

"Is there anything I can do for you?" Severus asked and got up, but Narcissa pulled him back. She didn't look at him though, but glared at Lucius.

"You're not his servant, Severus!"

"Uh - I am, in fact -"

Lucius clearly tried to look as nice as he could, still he couldn't help it but show his usual sneer. "You are not my servant, Severus, but my aid -"

"Boils down to the same thing!" Narcissa intensified her scowl. He must eventually understand that he wasn't wanted here , right?!

He wasn't impressed, sadly, simply continuing, "And not only my aid but my friend."

"You've got a strange concept of friendship!"

"Look who's talking!"

"Do you chase your other friends down to the Quidditch Pitch in pouring rain, too? Only to clip some twigs on your broom stick?!"

"But that's my job," Severus muttered.

"Yes, and do you think it entirely sensible to be bossed around only because of Quidditch?"

"He can leave if he wishes, but it appears he doesn't want to. Unlike you, I don't try to control him and everything else around me."

"I do no such thing!"

Severus had got to his feet once more, "Please, Narcissa -"

"Sit down, Severus!"

He exchanged some looks with his great friend, on his part helpless, on Malfoy's part - well - somehow indecipherable. "Speaking of bossing around, Miss Black! Ts ts ts. However, Severus, I was looking for you to ask you if you would be so kind and grease my leather gloves for the match against Ravenclaw."

"Certainly!"

"Your homework is more important than greasing his gloves, Severus!"

"And I thought you had already finished, seeing that you were about to give him a lesson on the subject of deception. I know you think nothing of Quidditch, so to you everything must be more important. But she is a genius, Severus. I think you do well to obey her -"

"He needn't obey me! He can do as he pleases!"

"Can he really? He's got up two times already and you've urged him not to, and he has obeyed. Which was very good of you, Severus, don't worry."

One side-glance at the kid proved her how unhappy he was with the situation. She inwardly cursed Malfoy for bringing him in such predicament, but that was just like him, wasn't it, he simply enjoyed to give others a hard time! But she wouldn't play his game, even if that meant that he got his will. She shut the book before her with a loud clap, gave Severus a gentle smile and said, "I think we're through anyway, dear. Run along, I know how you guys like Quidditch."

"Is that really all right by you?"

"Absolutely," she said and smiled yet more sweetly, only to glare at Malfoy in the next second. "It's fine. See you tomorrow, same time?"

She had hoped that Lucius would vanish with him, but she was disappointed bitterly. He left his comfortable position by the shelf and strolled over to her table, glancing at the books before her.

"You are one busy bee, aren't you?"

"Can I help you with anything?" She was pleased with herself for giving her voice just the right amount of spin.

"You could, yes..."

He looked straight into her eyes, penetratingly really, but she wouldn't allow him to make her look away first. "And...? What would that be?"

He didn't answer and he didn't turn his gaze away, neither did she. Despite herself, she noticed the remarkable colour of his eyes; she had noticed it before, of course, it was impossible to miss. Almost like silver, like a day in November shortly before the sun would come out - but never before she had seen his eyes from so close, and for so long. Before she got entirely mesmerised, she arched a brow, indicating him to speak.

"Well... For a start I'd be truly interested in the subject you were just about to teach our mutual friend."

She gave a mocking laugh. "I believe you're already a proficient expert."

He raised his brows. "What makes you say that?"

"Oh please! Do you really mean to tell me that you cannot lie?"

"I'm not a novice like good Severus, admittedly. But I don't think I'm as good as you."

"Sounds like a compliment, feels like a slap." She gave a fake smile. "Well done, Malfoy. I think that is something I could learn from you."

"Actually, I'm just copying you."

"Aww, thanks, I feel so flattered."

"You can."

"You are a gift to human kind, aren't you?"

"See? That's what I mean. On the surface, you are all calmness and composure, with a seeming glint of politeness here and there. But underneath, you are frothing with anger, and still you are very apt in concealing it."

"But I couldn't fool you, eh?" If she smiled any more falsely like this, her face would become stuck, and for the rest of her life, she'd roam the world looking like a total idiot!

"You look nice when you're smiling."

For a second, she thought he was taunting her, but either he was an excellent liar, or he was serious, and both unsettled her. "Yes, yes, I am a good liar, for I might look like I was smiling, but I do not feel like it at all."

He turned his eyes to the floor. "What would it take me to make you smile for real?"

"Leave?" She suggested dryly, seeing him smirk.

"Why am I bothering you so much?"

"Why do you bother me at all?"

"I would like to know you better."

She burst out laughing. "I bet you would. But let me tell you a secret - I'm every bit as nasty as people say I was. There's nothing else to discover."

"I don't believe you."

"I thought I was such a good liar?"

"You do put on a brilliant show, but I know you better."

She snorted. "What would I have to do to make you leave, Malfoy?"

"Go out with me."

She shook her head in exasperation. "Oh, for heaven's sake, what do you take me for?!"

He looked very earnestly. "I think you are a very, very pretty, and even more intelligent girl -"

"If you truly believe I was intelligent, how can you seriously assume that I'd be so silly as to fall for this rubbish?"

"Will you go out with me?"

"No!" He gave her a long, intense look, but this time she did look away. She packed her books into her bag, rolled up some parchments and put them away too. "Anything else? Good, because I will leave now!"

She got up, shouldered her bag and marched away without turning around once more. He was right. She was fuming with rage. That guy had a nerve! Asking her out! Ph! And then, she let herself be chased away, from her very own territory! The library was her space! He never went into the library, he'd rather send Severus to get him the books he needed! She stayed away from the Quidditch Pitch, he could have it, as long as he didn't go into the library and -

She stopped abruptly. What was she thinking there?! Her space, his territory, for goodness' sake! She prided herself to be a thoroughly rational, sensible person, and ten minutes conversation with this idiot drove her utterly mad! She took a deep breath, counted up to ten, checked herself and went on, calmer, and as serenely as she could. Still, such insolence! Asking her out! Her! She couldn't possibly feel more insulted. Ranking her with those insipid little sluts he else went out with! And if he was only going out with them, she would not bother, but all this guy wanted from a girl was sex and another trophy, and she would not lower herself like that, never!

On her way to the dungeons, she passed her sister, who was holding hands in broad daylight with the Ravenclaw Prefect, Ted Something. Oh, Andy! Couldn't she at least be careful?! Anyone could see them! That concern wasn't merely rooted in Narcissa's sense for decency and her abhorrence of the public display of caresses, but the deplorable fact that Ted Something was muggleborn. He was nice, according to Andromeda, that wasn't the point, but their parents would make such a fuss if they ever got wind of this!

She walked by and uttered under her breath, "Pull yourself together, Andy!"

Andromeda gave a giggle and stepped a bit closer to her companion. "Why don't you just get a life, Cissy?!"

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Quae modo... Pidgeons that have just been fighting, are billing now.

Omnis... All men lie!