Madame Josephine's Love Calculator

Draco woke up with a startle; his face drenched with sweat and his fine blonde hair was sticking up on odd angles. The top part of his pajama was stuck to his skin. He turned himself over to face the night table that stood next to his four-poster.

The luminous numbers on the small clock read that it was precisely five-thirty in the morning. He groaned. He rolled back on his back to face the stone patterned ceiling. He could hear the long and irritating snores of Goyle and the short and loud ones of Crabbe echo in their bedroom chamber.

He shut his eyes tightly and tried to concentrate on sleeping instead of the repetitive noises coming out from Goyle and Crabbe.

After about five minutes, Draco gave up on trying to fall back asleep. It was no use when the two boys were doing a quite noisy orchestra out of their mouths.

He dragged his body out of bed and into the bathroom. He groaned. The sight of him was quite unpleasant. There were black bags under his murky eyes due to the lack of sleep and his expression was one of annoyance mixed with tiresome. Not to mention that his fine, blonde hair which was normally smooth and compelling, had decided to play a disturbing trick on him.

Dragging a brush throw the jungle that was his hair, he managed to reduce it to something that could be called decent enough. Since it was Saturday, there were no classes today, therefore, no need for a uniform. He hunted in his top drawer for some clothes. The only thing left in his drawer was a thin cotton t-shirt and black trousers.

After a quick shower, he put his clothes on and descended to the Slytherin common room.

Naturally it was deserted. The only thing that was actually a movement in the silence of the room was crackling of the low burning fire.

"There must be something to do around here," Draco thought to himself impatiently as he searched around for something interesting to do.

The tables were swept clean and nothing had been dropped or forgotten on the floor. Draco sighed as he seated himself heavily in a green armchair. He looked around at the armchairs and sofas to see that a book had been forgotten in the chair in front of him. He got up and strolled across the room and grabbed the book. It was thick and heavy and on the cover was entitled in fine gold letters, Hogwarts: A History.

"You've got to be kidding me," he said a loud.

He stared back at the thick volume for a couple of minutes and then shrugged his shoulders.

"Oh what the hell," he muttered as he flopped down and opened the book.

***

It was precisely nine-thirty when Blaise came down from her dormitory dressed and ready to go eat breakfast.

She scanned the room to see if anyone would be of appropriation to be accompanied by for breakfast.

There was Pansy who was snubbing around over Malcolm Baddock, a yet very disturbing and grotesque sight, a group of First-Years and that were giggling at a very large picture of some famous wizard and there was Draco. He was seated in isolation from the others his head buried in a book.

She marched over to him and whispered in his ear, "What are you doing?"

He didn't answer just yet. She could see his eyes strolling down the page as he read it.

"Reading," he answered.

"Reading what?" she inquired.

He held up the book just enough so that she could clearly read the words, Hogwarts: A History.

"Are you mad?" she asked him. "Why in Salazar's name are you reading that- that dictionary Draco Malfoy?"

"Be quiet Blaise I'm at the part the Renaissance of Hogwarts," he said briskly.

She grabbed the book out of his hands and threw it on the floor without any gentleness or care. Draco stared at her in disbelief and shock.

"How can you throw the history of our beloved school like a piece of old parchment?" he asked her.

She gripped his arm tightly and pulled him out of the armchair.

"What is the meaning of this?" he demanded.

"I needed to get you out of that trance Malfoy," she answered. "You sounded like Granger for Merlin's sake!"

"Well thank you Blaise darling for that wake up call because if I sounded like a Mudblood then I must've been in a very remote and ill daze," he said to her as she pulled him out of the Slytherin common room.

"Come on and eat something, it'll make you think properly again," she told him.

***

Ginny sat at the Gryffindor table numb and dumbfounded. The plate in front of her, which was toppled with mountains of bacon, eggs and toast, was left untouched. Her head was perched on her hands as she watched the others eat and speak to one another cheerfully.

Ron was not enjoying himself either. First off, he had been released from the Hospital Wing earlier this morning but his jaw still ached terribly with pain thus made it very hard for him to eat anything. He was also in a fowl mood with Ginny and with Hermione who had decided on siding on his sister's side and not on his.

The atmosphere was tense and crisp between Ron, Ginny, Hermione and Harry.

Hermione and Harry eyed each other, a sign of worry in their eyes, they were aware that ominous clouds were brewing over the two Weasley heads.

"I do hope that you have not heard any news from that git Malfoy," Ron said to his sister dryly.

"That's none of your business Ron," Ginny answered.

"So you did see him!" cried Ron. "Admit it!"

"I am not admitting anything to you!" snapped Ginny.

"Admit it right now that you saw him yesterday night again!" he said imperiously.

"No!" she answered.

"Leave her alone Ron," snapped Harry in annoyance.

Ron grumbled and stabbed his eggs murderously. Ginny sighed and her eyes shifted towards the Slytherin table.

Draco was there, speaking to Blaise Zabini. She whispered something in his ear and he smirked.

Jealousy boiled inside Ginny, the blood in her rushed more quickly and her heart was beating against her ribcage. Her hands clenched tightly against the sturdy surface of the table. She breathed more quickly and her face flushed bright red. Her brown eyes that were usually compelling and bright were now flaring with rage.

Draco suddenly turned towards Ginny and looked at her. His face was now expressionless, his mouth slightly open. She looked at him for five seconds before turning away from him angrily.

She quickly excused herself from the table mumbling something about a headache and exited the Great Hall in a hurry.

***

Draco sighed as he watched Ginny leave. She looked absolutely livid. He wasn't at all surprised about it either.

"What is Slytherin's name?" Blaise said in utter shock.

"What?" he asked.

"Take a look at this," she answered, thrusting the Daily Prophet in front of Draco.

November 25^th

The Ministry of Magic has arrested Madame Josephine Anna McKenzie, known to be the creator and owner of Madame Josephine's Love Calculator Wizard work today.

Madame Josephine's Love Calculator was a popular wizard site mostly used by adolescences. Proven to match you up with your long last love and find eternal happiness with that person was the site's motto. Bernard Wellington, Head of Department for New Wizard Inventions, declared it a sham.

"We had many complaints saying that the person they had been teamed up with was a complete disaster and led to some horrific results," says Wellington. "We investigated the Wizard work and found out that the program simply teamed up any two names together anonymously. There was not one couple that could work it out."

Madame Josephine will serve trial for False Wizard Work Advertisement tomorrow morning. And to all those innocent wizards and witches who have tried Madame Josephine's Love Calculator we bid you much sorry for any damage it may have caused to each and every one of you.

Beside the text was a picture of Madame Josephine being carried away by two people from the ministry. She was a rather chunky woman with long black curly hair that was nested under her scarlet scarf. She was blubbering frantically and waving her arms in much distress at Draco.

Draco's eyes nearly bulged out of their sockets. His mouth had suddenly gone dry and he gaped at the article.

"I don't understand," he muttered so quietly that only Blaise heard him.

"What don't you understand?" she asked him.

"The article says that the Love Calculator was all a sham and that all couples had no chemistry together," he said slowly.

"Your point is Draco?" she answered.

"If all couples had no chemistry and they couldn't get along then why did Ginny and I never fight?" he replied.

Blaise didn't answer. She just sat there staring back at him.

"Blaise?" he said.

"Don't you get it Malfoy?" she cried out to him so suddenly that he jumped. "You were destined to be together! She's the one for you!"

"Blaise you're starting to sound as if this whole thing is some romance story!" he answered.

"Malfoy wake up and stop shitting around!" she snapped at him. "Go do something before you ruin both your lives!"

"Even if we were destined to be together, we could never be together," he said to her, his eyes looking away from her. "I don't deserve her."

"You're such an arrogant git Malfoy!" she said raising her voice a little.

"Blaise stop it people are looking at us," he told her.

"I don't care!" she snapped. "Draco Malfoy says that he doesn't deserve Ginny Weasley? What's next? Voldemort was supposed to be in Hufflepuff?"

"I'm telling the truth," he said now getting angry himself. "She shouldn't get involved with me, it'll cause her too much trouble and she doesn't deserve to live a life of misery."

"Sure Draco you're life isn't perfect but neither is anyone's," she said to him now quietly. "You deserve love as well as anyone else."

She stood up and left him there.

Draco was silent, thinking of what Blaise had just said to him.

He checked his watch and realized that there was five minutes left before he had to be in Professor McGonagall's office to serve his detention.

He quickly walked out of the Great Hall but the question still rung in his mind.

Did he deserve love?

***

Professor McGonagall waited for Draco to arrive in her office, her back perpendicular to the chair that she was seated in.

In front of her was Ron, slouched in his chair, tilting it back slightly as if he were entertaining himself.

The door then blew wide open to reveal Draco, his hair slightly untidy and a faint flush visible on his cheeks. He was gasping a bit for air.

"Professor," he said still gasping. "Am I late?"

"No Mr.Malfoy you managed to get here a minute before you could actually be declared late," answered Professor McGonagall. "Take a seat beside Mr. Weasley."

Both boys glared at each other.

Draco sat beside him scruffily, still eyeing Ron with disgust. Ron returned a menacing look.

"Normally students serve detentions at night," said Professor McGonagall ignoring what the boys were doing. "Though this couldn't wait. The Owlery is so filthy that even the owls have refused to fly into it. As punishment you two will clean the Owlery without use of magic."

Both boys opened their mouths to protest but shut them quickly.

"Now give me your wands please," she then said extending out an open hand.

Draco and Ron each gave their wand reluctantly and scuffled out of the office.

***

The foul smelling air of the Owlery filled the boys nostrils like a greasy bug. Draco's face scrunched up in great dislike and he clutched his stomach.

"I think I'm going to be sick," he cried, his face slightly paler.

"Oh buck it up Malfoy you overgrown worm," snapped Ron, though he covered his mouth and nose with his hand.

"Weasley, I know that you're used to these conditions," sneered Draco. "But I live in what we call a decent house."

"Stuff it Malfoy!" growled Ron.

"You stuff it," retorted Draco.

Ron ignored him and grabbed the nearest sponge and began scrubbing the nearest cage.

Draco, with much disgust picked up another sponge and extended his arm towards another cage, trying to scrub the best he could from a far distance. His face crinkled with much hatred at this punishment.

Ron snickered at this silently.

"Wait until my father hears of this," muttered Draco angrily. "A Malfoy cleaning an owl's cage, unbelievable!"

"Do you still need your daddy to fight your battles Dracey-Poo?" said Ron in a childish voice.

"I don't need him in order to drive your head through that wall Weasley!" snapped Draco, now getting very angry.

Ron remained silent and continued scrubbing as did Draco. Ten minutes had passed and only five cages were clean. Four had been done by Ron and one by Draco.

"I'm not stupid Malfoy," Ron said suddenly.

"Couldn't be proven by me," answered Draco.

"I know that my sister and you saw each other after the Ball yesterday," said Ron.

Draco didn't reply but continued scrubbing his second cage.

"So I'm right," he then said.

"What's your point Weasley?" snapped Draco.

"My point is what the hell did you say or do to her?" retorted Ron.

"Have you gone mental?" asked Draco, his eyebrows raised.

"Not yet," he replied with a flick of anger in his voice. "I'm asking what did you say to her when you saw her yesterday?"

"What's it to you?" he demanded though he sounded more curious than angry.

"I know when something is bothering my sister and something is bothering her now," was his answer.

The anger was still visible on his face but had drained out of his eyes. They now held what seemed like sadness.

"I told her that we shouldn't see each other anymore because- because I didn't think that I deserved to be with her," he muttered barely a whisper without looking in Ron's direction, it seemed as though he wasn't even talking to him at all.

"Look I know I'm going to regret saying this but I'm going to tell you anyways," said Ron and Draco looked up at him. "Ginny was for once happy during those weeks while you two were speaking to one another, she was in love and- (he swallowed hard, it seemed difficult for him to say this) you deserve to be with each other."

Draco looked at him in utter amazement. It was the first time in his whole life that Ron Weasley had actually said something decent to him.

"Weasley, even though were enemies and we will always remain that, what you have just said really means a lot to me," he answered still looking at Ron.

"I know Malfoy," he replied.

Draco stood up and dusted his clothes even though there was no dust on them. He chucked the sponge on the floor and started to leave.

"Where are you going?" demanded Ron.

"I'm off to fix a confusion between myself and someone else," he announced.

"Don't you mean you're going to fix a mistaken between yourself and someone else?" he asked.

"Malfoys don't make mistakes you moron," he retorted, glaring at Ron.

He proceeded to the door when Ron called after him again.

"You can't leave!" he cried.

"Why not?" Draco answered impatiently.

"We're not finished cleaning the cages that's why!" he replied pointing to the remaining cages.

It seemed like there were about five hundred cages left.

Draco smirked and pulled out his wand, muttering an incantation and half of the dirty cages were sparkling clean before Ron's eyes.

Ron's jaw dropped down about two meters and he looked at Draco in disbelief.

"But- but," he stammered. "You gave your wand to McGonagall!"

"Correction I gave a Weasley Wizard Wheezes wand to McGonagall," he said again with a smirk.

"You buy my brothers' merchandises?" Ron asked in surprise.

"Don't be silly Weasley," he snorted. "I found it in my stocking last year at Christmas."

"Figures," muttered Ron under his breath.

Draco exited the Owlery still snickering at Ron who was madly scrubbing away on another cage.