She Says

She says forget what you have to do

Pretend there is nothing outside this room

With a final glance in either direction to make sure the corridor on the seventh floor is empty, I turn the doorknob and enter the Room of Requirement. This time, I find it dimly lit with torches and firelight from the left side of the room. Ginny is laying on the only piece of furniture in the room, a large bed, with her legs out in front of her, crossed at the ankle. Her hair is spread out across a white feather pillow and she's looking distractedly up at the ceiling. I have only a split second to appreciate how beautiful she looks before she sits upright, aware of my presence. This sudden action reminds me of how apprehensive I am about being here, because I know I can't ignore what I have to do. It's not as easy as she makes it seem. If you listened only to what she had to say on the matter, you would be convinced that this whole situation were no more complicated than de-gnoming the garden. Yes, it was painful if they bit you, but otherwise, it was dull and simple work for the youngest first year.

Ron needs me and Harry needs Ginny; I think we both know that. Yet, I still find myself here under Ginny's orders. I find it is impossible to say no to her; about as impossible as telling a lie under the influence of Veritaserum.

And like an idea she came to me

Ginny came to me with an open heart and outstretched arms. She came to me needing a friend at the tender age of eleven. She came to me needing more at the age of 15.

But she came too late

Or maybe too soon

I cross the room and sit down on the bed, turned slightly away from her.

"It's not the right time," I tell her bluntly.

"I know that. But Hermione, there is never going to be a right time for us. We have to do it ourselves, take matters into our own hands."

She is looking at me with determination blazing in her eyes.

"Maybe if we had done this sooner, it would have worked. Or maybe there will be a opportunity years from now... but not now."

I said please try not to love me

Close your eyes, I'm turning on the light

"Yes, Hermione, now," she demands. "Can't you see that I love you?" she finishes breathlessly.

"But Ginny, you can't love me," I exclaim, trying desperately to reason with her.

"Not even as a friend?" she challenges harshly.

"Of course you can love me as a friend... just not as anything more. Please Ginny, for both of us, don't love me. Please." I plead with her frantically. I hate myself for saying these things to Ginny, forbidding her from loving me the way she wants to and the way I want her to. I know, in my mind, that I would hate myself even more for letting it happen.

You know I have no vacancy

And it's awfully cold outside tonight

"Damn it, Hermione. I know you want this too." Ginny slams her fist deep into the comforter in barely controlled anger.

"It doesn't matter what I want," I press on, ignoring Ginny's rage, "But I know that what truly matter are my responsibilities and my loyalties. I have to be loyal to Ron."

"And in doing so, not being loyal to me."

"That's just the way it has to be."

Her severe tone is replaced by a choked whisper as she asks the dreaded question, "There isn't room for me in your life anymore...is there?"

I don't have an answer to this and a tense silence overtakes the room. I push myself off the bed and walk over to a window on the other side of the room. I look out onto the desolate grounds and gray sky.

"I'm cold," I say, breaking the silence. As soon as the words leave my mouth I realize that I have willingly set into motion the very thing I both fear and want.

I hear her walk over and stand behind me. I feel her arms wrap around my waist and her clasped hands rest against my stomach. She begins to kiss my neck and I am lost in her touch. She has complete control over me, and she knows it.

And the rain stains the brick a darker red

Slowly I'm rolling out of the bed

It was a mistake, a pleasurable and satisfying mistake, but a mistake nonetheless.

The rain stains the streets a darker black

I dress my face in stone

Because I can't go back

What's done is done. We will just have to forget about it and move on. I put on an unreadable expression as I dress, preparing myself to tell the bad news of which I am the unfortunate messenger.

I feel her eyes watching me

From behind the curtain of her hair

And she says I'm sorry

I didn't mean to stare

"That's alright. But, Ginny, you have to understand something."

"Yes?" She smiles up at me, the memory of last night filling her, lighting her up.

"We can't let this happen again."

"Oh." Her smile fades and she quickly drops her gaze.

I can tell she is heartbroken. I empathize completely, and feel responsible for the pain in her eyes.

"Hermione," she whispers in despair as she reaches out to touch my arm.

I push her hand away.

Ginny gasps a little in surprise. I pull on my robes and lift my hair over the collar.

The next thing I know, Ginny is right in front of me, kissing me aggressively and holding me in her strong grip. I give in for a minute, like I gave in the night before, but then I come back to my senses.

I push her away.

I say I think I really have to go right now

But oh baby, maybe someday

Maybe somehow