Allstar

Hermione slipped into the fifth year girl's dormitory and sat down on Ginny's bed. "Gin?" She whispered as loudly as she dared. "Ginny, wake up." Ginny blinked, muttered something unintelligible and turned over, burying her face in her pillow. Hermione sighed. "Come on, Ginny, wake up. I want to talk to you." Ginny groaned, but opened one eye.

"Wha-? Hermione, it's early."

"I know," Hermione shushed the other girl. "I wanted to talk to you. Come on." She led Ginny down to the common room, where they settled in two of the armchairs by the fireplace. Hermione paused for a moment, collecting her thoughts. It was a bit sad, really, but despite her contempt for divination, she knew that there were some things that just had to be. And some things that couldn't be. Hermione never shrank from her duty.

"So what is it that's so important you have to wake me up at six in the morning?" Ginny looked rather disgruntled.

"I just wanted to tell you...To make sure you understood...It really isn't Harry's fault, Ginny," Hermione finished in a rush. "It was Ron and I, we wouldn't let him tell you. About our...project. And it isn't that we don't trust you! It's just...just that..." Hermione trailed off. She rarely felt this inarticulate. But then, she rarely felt this guilty either.

"Just that I'm not part of your group," Ginny finished softly. "Just that to tell me your secret, even if it isn't that important, would bring me into your little circle. And I don't belong there. It's okay, Hermione, I do understand." Hermione bit her lip. That basically was what she'd been wanting to tell Ginny. In fact, it was just about exactly what she'd been thinking. So why did she feel even more guilty now? She started as Ginny stood up.

"Where are you going?" she asked stupidly.

"Back to bed. I still have at least another hour to sleep." Ginny smiled wryly. "Look, Hermione, don't worry about it. I'm fine."

"But -"

Ginny frowned. "Go to bed, Hermione. You look like you could use some more sleep too." And with that, she was gone. Hermione stared into the embers left from the previous night's fire, wondering why she felt like that hadn't gone well.

* * *

Despite her resolve to go straight back to sleep, Ginny found herself wide awake. She stared at the canopy of her bed, unable to stop thinking about what her encounter with Hermione. It really was true: she didn't belong in their circle. They had been through a lot together that she wasn't a part of, and never would be. Ginny wondered idly if she ought to be feeling so calm. Surely this was cause for her to be upset? Ginny was used to being upset quite often; she had a theory that it came with the hair. Or perhaps her family. Same thing, really. Anyway. Why wasn't she angry? Was she maturing? Ginny found the idea rather disconcerting.

* * *

That morning at breakfast, Ginny led Harry to a part of the Gryffindor table away from their regular seat mates.

"What all this about?" he asked lightly. Ginny smiled tolerantly at his cheerfulness. She would never understand morning people.

"I just wanted to talk to you," she answered, "Away from prying ears." She felt suddenly nervous, but stiffened her resolve. "I was talking to Hermione this morning..."

"This morning? When?"

"Six. She woke me up." Harry grimaced in sympathy.

"Anyway, I was talking to Hermione, and really hit me, Harry, that I'm not a part of your group." Harry started to protest, but Ginny ignored it. If she stopped, she might not be able to get started again. "It's become clear to me that I'm not what you need. You could only have two types of girls, you know. A girl you could share everything with, like Hermione, or a girl that you could come home to and forget about everything with. That isn't me, Harry, and you won't let me be the other."

"But - I tried, Ginny." Harry gestured helplessly. "I tried to talk to Ron and -"

"I know, Harry," Ginny interrupted. "But even if they'd agreed, it would never have worked out. You three are too...established, I guess, for me to just walk in and be accepted. I'm not blaming you." Ginny paused, exhausted. "I'm not blaming you," she repeated softly.

"So. This is it, then." Harry ran his hand through his hair, a motion Ginny knew well.

"Yeah." Ginny was startled at the hoarseness of her voice. "Yeah, this is it." She stood, and surprised herself by smiling at her boyfriend. Ex-boyfriend, she reminded herself sternly. This was obviously going to take some getting used to. "No hard feelings, Harry?" He laughed starkly, and Ginny flinched.

"Sure," Harry said humorlessly. "No hard feelings." Ginny shut her eyes. The cacophony of the dining hall seemed out of place, and she was reminded of the night that she had run out on Harry. She felt the same impulse again, but exerted enough self-control to stay for a moment longer. She opened her eyes and found him looking at her. Ginny bit her lip and resisted the panic that threatened to wash over her. She forced herself to walk calmly out of the hall and back to her dormitory. When she finally allowed herself to cry, she was surprised to taste blood in her mouth.