Shown Like the Sun

Chapter 20

No one hears his lonely sigh....

--The Allman Brothers Band

***

Althea absentmindedly took a sip of her lemonade as Gran droned on about an irrelevant Ministry ball that she would miss in the late summer. To promote magical cooperation, she thought as her eyes wandered toward a particularly flawless rose bloom. The blossom, full and bright pink, had attracted a honeybee that crept along its satin petals. To promote my boredom, more like it. She lifted the cool glass to her lips, sighed with some annoyance, and placed the half full glass upon the table.

The three women sat underneath an ancient oak tree at the edge of the rose garden. Althea's eyes drifted upward at the low-lying branches. Her dark blue eyes lazily traced the course of the longest gnarled branch until smaller, contorted branches overtook it at its farthest point. I would sit up there for hours, she thought and squinted her eyes. What if I would transform at this moment? I could fly up there and squawk at Gran and Afina below. She sighed wistfully.

Althea did enjoy late afternoons such as this, surveying her gardens underneath her large, floppy white hat as honeybees and various insects hummed and buzzed about. The noises were peaceful to her and could quiet her mind; however, her mind could not quiet this late afternoon, as it would return to that tumultuous morning. Althea and Sirius had avoided one another for most of the morning and afternoon. She looked in the direction of the carriage house in the distance. Sirius had spent the better part of his morning in the carriage house with the hippogriff. Buckbeak extended his wings and Althea was grateful at Sirius' cleverness with Repelling Charms. I reckon he'll sleep out there, she thought, and frowned at his missed presence, as she had grown accustomed to his large tail wagging against her leg underneath the table. Always by my side.

Althea shifted and tugged at her sundress--her frustration increasing as Gran lamented that Althea would not be wearing one of Afina's creations to the ball. As if I could tell them what happened, she thought as Afina promised Gran that Althea would wear one of her frocks to the charity ball in October. Oh, by the way Afina, I woke up to Sirius throttling me this morning. He had an awful dream about Azkaban. I'd like him to get some help, if you don't mind? Right, she'd kill him, and Gran...she'd offer him up to a dementor. Althea felt a small knot in her stomach as she studied the pattern of dark purple peonies against the white fabric of her sundress. Regression is possible, she thought as Afina expressed her excitement at her first Quidditch World Cup. I've had my moments. Althea thought to her first staff party at Hogwarts where she held a knife to Snape's throat. It was inevitable that a sound, smell, word, or situation could trigger a violent or deranged reaction. One could not leave Azkaban after twelve years unscathed, and she frowned deeply as she imagined Sirius, alone, succumbing to a momentary slip into madness. I reckon it's that old woman, she thought darkly as Gran expressed her apprehension at spending a night or two in a tent--even if it had four bedrooms, a full bath, and a pianoforte for entertaining. He needs help. He would be safe in Alexandria--Sister Margaret would listen to him without judgment. He'd have the sun, potions, Cheering Charms, chocolate...all the opportunities I had forced upon me. She wrinkled her nose. Sirius in a convent?

"I have an extra ticket to the match," Gran said as Althea smoothed the loose pleats of her dress. "I'd very much like it if you would attend. The Minister of Ireland's Undersecretary--"

Althea made a face and Afina snickered.

"--is eager to meet you," Gran finished and frowned as she took a sip of lemonade.

"Is eager to remove my knickers," she corrected and smirked as Afina snorted her lemonade. Before Gran could make a disapproving remark, she continued, "I sent them a letter yesterday."

"Who?" Afina asked as her lime green fascinator fluttered in the breeze.

Althea straightened herself in her chair. "The Parkers."

Gran relaxed slightly in her chair. "Good," she said and pursed her lips. "Did you suggest--"

"Yes," Althea sighed and a moderate gust of wind lifted a portion of the pale pink tablecloth up over the table. "I suggested a tutor for her, and no, I didn't suggest Freddie's tutor," she continued, flattening out the tablecloth. "I suggested Remus."

Gran nodded faintly with approval. "Remus is an appropriate choice," she said as she brushed a small brightly colored insect off her muslin sleeve. "Very patient and a capable wizard."

Althea felt a small upsurge in gratitude toward Gran. Not many Wizarding society matrons would associate themselves with a werewolf or hold one in such high esteem.

"Are you sure, though?" Afina remarked, leaning forward. "I mean, can he be her tutor? I read about those new Ministry laws--"

"He needs a job," Althea interrupted as she waved her hand to disregard Afina's apprehension. "He's fantastic. He was a tutor to an American boy a few years ago."

"Really?" Afina breathed, raising her eyebrows. "What happened?"

Althea lifted her glass. "A few chickens went missing," she explained and swirled the last bit of lemonade around the glass. "The neighbors discovered his furry little problem."

Afina snickered. "That's awful," she laughed and covered her mouth as she shook. She leaned close to Althea and whispered loudly, laughingly, "It sounds as though you're talking about unruly pubic hair."

Althea slyly cast a glance at Gran, who was thin lipped. "It does a bit, doesn't it?" she remarked, wrinkling her nose.

Afina eagerly awaited Althea's further consideration of Remus Lupin's pubic hair.

"Anyway," she said and Afina sighed with playful disappointment, "I don't care what the Ministry thinks on the matter. When has the Ministry ever truly cared what those Muggleborns that never attended Hogwarts do? No tutors. No wands. To the Ministry, she's a twelve-year-old girl of Muggle parentage...there are no laws requiring Hogwarts...or a tutor."

"I don't want him in trouble, that's all," Afina replied and sank into her chair.

"The Ministry won't know," Althea said and smiled to herself. "He'll be paid in Muggle money."

"Maybe he'll buy himself some robes," Afina murmured, folding her arms. "He didn't accept the ones I made for him."

"When did you make him robes?" Althea asked, raising an eyebrow.

Afina unfolded her arms, refusing to look at Althea. "When he visited me in New York."

"When?" she pressed teasingly.

Afina sighed with mild annoyance. "A few weeks ago," she answered, tugging at the tablecloth. "Bloody pride."

Althea smiled sympathetically. "Next time, place the robes in his case as he's about to leave. He won't realize his old robes are gone until he returns home," she said and Afina's expression exhibited modest admiration. "I've done this a few times," she continued and winked. "Or you could just stick a few pins in his bum like you did to me and he'll feel obligated to take them."

"He doesn't have much of a bum," Afina murmured.

"Well, not one you can see in those robes, anyway," Althea replied and faintly furrowed her eyebrows. "Hang on, how would you know--"

"Gran's here," Afina interrupted through gritted teeth.

Althea leaned back in her chair and folded her arms. "I'd like to know," she said, smirking at the new pink of Afina's cheeks.

Afina sighed and shot a weary look at Gran. "I walked in as he was changing," she explained, picking at the tablecloth. She giggled lowly. "He yelped like a bloody girl."

"Good," Althea said as Gran gave her a stern look. "I thought I'd have to hex him."

Afina made a face. "No, Auntie, no," she said quickly and stuck out her tongue. "He's--"

"Old?" she finished, jokingly narrowing her eyes at Afina.

Afina shifted uncomfortably in her chair and hesitated before she corrected, "A bit uncool."

"Uncool?" she repeated and arched her eyebrow.

"Yeah," she said and paused as she searched for her words, "have you seen him dance?"

"Dance? With a woman?" she asked and nodded. "Yes, I've--"

"No," she said uneasily as her eyes darted from side to side, "by himself."

Althea frowned. "I reckon I haven't."

"He is a sensible man," Gran offered.

Afina leaned forward. "It was embarrassing," she whispered and shivered. "He sort of swayed and bobbed up and down," she explained, mimicking incredibly awkward arm movements. "Like an uncle at a wedding."

Althea fought her urge to snicker. "Well, he is like an uncle," she reminded and decided that she would force Remus to attend Sophie's New Year's Eve party. "Was it Pan?"

Afina nodded.

"It's not the easiest music to dance to, is it?" she replied as Gran nodded in agreement. "I reckon not many men can dance, though...too ridiculous on the dance floor."

Afina, with her fingertips, traced circles into the tablecloth. "Could Sirius dance?"

It became unnaturally quiet. Why did you mention his name, Afina, she wondered, as Afina--without looking up from the tablecloth--continued to trace circles. Gran's lips contorted into a slight sneer. Althea inhaled a shallow breath.

"Really, Afina, I'd rather not--"

"I'd like to know," she said and finally looked up from the table to Althea.

She was slow to respond, "Yes, if I remember."

"If you called that dancing, Althea Rosemary."

Her lips contorted into an uneasy smile. "We might've danced a little close."

"It was like that MTV."

Althea laughed with surprise. "How do you know about MTV, Gran?" she asked, leaning toward Gran as the old woman folded her arms. "Do you watch it?"

Gran sighed with mild irritation. "I might be old, but I'm not ignorant."

"Of course, not," she said and reclined against the back of her chair. "No, he was good--a good dancer, I mean."

Afina clicked her teeth. "Good at everything, isn't he?"

Althea's smile faltered as she felt her face flush. "Really, Afina."

Afina shrugged. "I've never heard you speak of anything he couldn't do or wasn't good at."

Althea gave Afina a warning look. "Let's not--"

"Indeed," Gran said. "I don't want to ruin my afternoon with that foul boy's exploits."

Althea sighed, "He's innocent--"

"Innocent, indeed," Gran replied, her lips thin.

Althea knew the vitriol that was about to spew from her pursed lips despite her previous declarations to the contrary.

"He never cared for your safety and deliberately endangered the lives of those around him. Disrespectful, willfully insubordinate, a menace--"

"Dogged," Afina chimed, "very dogged."

Althea paled, her stomach sick with betrayal at Afina's collaboration. She's never encouraged Gran, she thought and swallowed with some difficulty. Don't do this to me.

"Why?" she mouthed at Afina.

Afina looked out of the corner of her eye at Gran, who continued to describe Sirius' shortcomings, and then to Althea. "Tell her," she mouthed and sighed with disappointment when Althea faintly shook her head. "Tell her."

"No!" Althea mouthed heatedly

"The Ministry did you a favor--"

Althea hastily stood from her chair. "He's innocent!" she said excitedly, slamming her palm against the table. The glasses clinked and a few droplets of lemonade sloshed out of the pitcher. She trembled slightly as Gran looked on at her outburst. "He's innocent," she repeated, looking from Afina to Gran.

"And?"

Gran's reply licked at her insides. "He called for me the night I was tortured," she replied with forced calm. "He was out there--looking for me, shouting for me--as the death eaters cast a Silencing Charm so I couldn't shout back."

Afina gasped and Althea thought she saw a faint smile.

"Yes," she said, looking directly at Afina. "It was a war and my life was at risk no matter what I did. Did you forget the raids of St. Mungo's?"

Gran remained silent.

"Who helped subdue the Caretaker under the Imperius Curse?" she asked, her voice higher and her nostrils flared. "If he hadn't arrived on that awful and disgraceful motorbike there is a good chance I wouldn't be here now."

"You give him too much credit," Gran said, sitting forward--her posture still unnaturally rigid. "You have always been so feeble about that boy--"

"Do you want me to admit that I still love him?" she asked, looking into Gran's eyes. "Do you?"

Afina inched forward in her chair.

"Is that what you want?" she pressed pointedly. "For me to admit that despite everything I still love him?"

"Only a fool--"

"You do!" she countered, pointing her index finger at Gran. "And, what does it matter?" she asked, throwing up her arms. Her arms fell back heavily at her sides. "It wouldn't make a difference to you if we were reunited now, after his name is cleared, or if all this time I was sending him letters in Azkaban. He will always be that foul, hateful, duplicitous boy that came from that family, and nothing good ever came from that dark a family," she continued and inhaled a breath. "Of which, you conveniently forget that my Prudence--his daughter--is descended from that family."

Afina's mouth was parted slightly.

"Right," she sighed and turned to leave.

"Would he take you back?"

Althea stopped. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply through her nose. Go to hell, old woman, she thought as she opened her eyes.

"Would he, Althea Rosemary, take you back?"

Althea narrowed her eyes and started to walk away. "Without hesitation."

Still seething, adrenaline coursing through her veins, Althea hurriedly climbed the rocky path that overlooked the bay. How could she do this to me, she thought as a gust of salty wind lifted the floppy hat from her head. She walked quickly as the hat tumbled along the long, slender grass. To put me in that position! It's as if she wanted me to tell Gran! Althea swiftly snatched the hat, caught in the brush, and she frowned faintly at the streaks of dirt and grass stains. Looking up from her now disheveled hat, she found herself at the edge of the rocky cliffs, overlooking the clear blue-green waters of the bay. Sirius sat at the center of the pink sand beach, his knees to his chest, facing the water. Gran will never accept you, she thought as the tall grasses softly stroked her bare legs. It's different now. Your family is gone. It's just you. No one can hurt us.

"Except the Ministry," she murmured and looked out at the bay. "As long as Peter is out there."

Althea transformed and glided and swooped--enjoying the breeze against her tiny frame--from the cliff to perch gently atop Sirius' head. She felt Sirius shake quietly with laughter.

"You better be my Althea, or this will be awkward."

She craned her neck to be beak to nose with him. Sirius crossed his eyes and stuck out his tongue. Suddenly, she felt two large, thin hands upon her body, and Sirius gently placed her next to him. She transformed once more and stretched, smiling at the pleasing sensation of warm sand against her bare legs.

Althea spotted a sand encrusted metal box before him. "What's that?"

Sirius picked up the box and sat cross-legged. "A privateer by the name of Lady Althea Morrigan buried this," he explained, narrowing his eyes with mock thoughtfulness, as he held up the box for both of them to examine.

Althea laughed with surprise as she recognized the small metal box decorated with crudely painted flowers.

"God, I must've buried these all over the island," she remarked as Sirius placed the box in her lap.

"The curses surrounding this treasure were quite simple to break," he said, handing her a piece of folded brown paper.

Althea unfolded the brown, faded paper and winced at her childish handwriting, an attempt at Early Modern English.

"As you can see, the skeletons of her ship's crew have not carried me out to sea," he said, resting his hands behind him.

"I was nine," she said and peered into the sand-filled box. "Good Lord, what did I put in here?"

Althea scooped out a handful of sand and laughed lowly as she pulled out a long beaded necklace. "That Muggle festival with the naked people."

"The what?" he asked, bemused.

Althea's eyes examined the faded plastic and wooden beads.

"My father, thought the advent of hippies would usher in a new age of understanding and cooperation between Magic and Muggle."

She remembered the horror on her father's face as he found her spinning at the center of a drum circle--her new saffron robes billowing about her--her painted face smiling up at him.

"Needless to say," she continued and placed the necklace into her lap, "my open-minded father was out of his element."

"My mother was afraid of them. We had a boggart in the cupboard," he said and began to laugh, "I'd never seen her so frightened."

Althea smiled. "I'd expect nothing less from her," she said and scooped out more sand.

Althea's further treasures reflected their importance of her nine-year-old self: a shell, a few coins from her travels, and a porcelain figurine of an elephant. Disappointing, she thought and sighed. I believe I've buried at least five more of these boxes around the island. She smiled, amused at what she could discover, and poured the remaining sand from the box. My Animagus form should've been a squirrel. Suddenly, something thin, gleaming, and silver was dangled before her eyes.

Althea blinked to adjust her eyes. "That was my mother's bracelet," she said in awe. "Where did you--"

He smiled as he nodded toward the box. "I found it in there."

Althea's eyes hungrily took in the bracelet before her as Sirius gently placed the delicately woven bracelet into her hands.

"I can't believe it isn't tarnished," she said and desperately wished she could remember her mother wearing that bracelet.

"It's goblin, that's why."

She furrowed her eyebrows. "I found it in my father's things," she said, as her thumb tenderly stroked the elegantly scripted A that dangled from it. "I had nothing."

Althea wrapped the bracelet around her left wrist and frowned when she could not clasp it. She held out her wrist for Sirius and he smiled warmly. Althea held up her wrist and gingerly shook it, watching as the silver bracelet shimmered in the sunlight.

"Thank you," she murmured and kissed his cheek.

Sirius shrugged and sniffed. He looked out to sea once more. "I was thinking of going south...Brazil."

Althea's heart sank. Sirius' expression bore defeat.

"Remus spent some time there--really enjoyed it, if I remember," she said lightly and forced a smile. "It will be good for you, I think, to spend your days on the beaches of Rio." She leaned close to him and whispered, "All those beautiful girls...you'll quickly forget that I exist."

Sirius let out a half-hearted laugh. "Likely."

Althea looked to the small space of sand between them. "There will be a time when you will be truly free, Sirius," she said and took in Sirius' expression. He remained grim. "I want you to have help."

Sirius gave her a look.

"It's nothing to be ashamed of," she said, placing her hand on his thigh. "I want you to be happy."

"Happy?" he mouthed, his expression softened.

"Yes, she said in earnest. "I don't want you to be afraid."

***

Althea dimmed the lamps in the study.

"Are you sure you're comfortable?"

Sirius nodded as he looked at the sofa. "Yeah, I'm fine," he said distantly. "Thank you."

"Right," she sighed and held the blanket tighter. "Wouldn't you like this?"

"No, thank you, I'll be fine," he said and smiled half-heartedly. "Goodnight."

He lifted his hand to her cheek, but thought better of it and let it drop awkwardly to his side. Althea disregarded his apprehension and kissed his cheek. Sirius transformed and jumped onto the sofa.

"The potion should work as soon as you close your eyes," she said as Sirius stretched and yawned. She kissed the top of his head and his tail wagged happily. "Predictable," she muttered and teasingly narrowed her eyes.

Althea left the sleeping Sirius and closed the door behind her. Afina was before her, in the darkened entrance hall, with her arms folded. They had not spoken since the confrontation in the rose garden.

"Why did you do that to me?" Althea said, stepping forward.

Afina gently kicked the wooden floor with the heel of her slipper. "I reckon it's time she knows," she said quietly.

"No," she answered, vigorously shaking her head. "Gran can't--"

"You're a thirty-four-year-old woman, Auntie!" she whispered, unfolding her arms. "A grown woman who still acts as if she's sixteen!"

"You don't understand," she said, praying that Gran remained in her bedroom.

"Right, I don't," she said, stepping forward. She placed her hands on Althea's upper arms. "He loves you--always at your side--and he should be at your side in his human form."

Althea was silent.

"You are happy," she said, gently shaking Althea. "You deserve to be open and happy," she continued and smiled sympathetically. "Don't be a coward, tell her."

Althea slowly removed Afina's hands. "No."

Althea entered her bedroom, which invoked an odd feeling of loneliness as she looked upon her bed bathed in the moonlight. She climbed into bed and attempted to make herself comfortable, but no position or fluffing of her pillows brought her welcomed sleep. This bed is absolutely enormous, she thought as she lay on her back. She listened to the sounds of the tree frogs as she looked at the odd shadows cast at the foot of her bed. Why did I ever think I needed a bed so large? Althea sighed as she missed the heaviness next to her--the warmth. I've gotten so used to him. She smiled longingly at how easy it was for her to become accustomed to his presence in her bed once more. She turned onto her side and expected his arm to slide across her waist, holding her close to him--his breath warming her neck and shoulder.

"Maybe I should take a sleeping potion?" she wondered aloud, but quickly frowned.

No, I don't want to become dependent upon them...again, she thought as she turned to her other side. I just hope I haven't started Sirius down that path. Althea curled up on Sirius' side of the bed, hugging his pillow close to her. She could smell the intermingling of his soap, shampoo, and sweat. This will do, she thought and closed her eyes.