The Pensieve of Bellatrix Black

Bellatrix reached a hand up to her hair-do and made sure it was still together. She glanced up at the high sun and realized it was sometime in the early afternoon. This surprised her since she had lost all track of time in the forest, caught up in her revelry. Even though she had spent the last three days wandering and getting herself covered in twigs and dirt, she looked more than presentable now. She was wearing a dark green set of dress robes that were a bit on the informal side. It also had a deep neckline that showed her off really well. She and Narcissa had fought on this, though, because Bella was going with a black set with a higher neckline. But, Cissy could be quite adamant when she needed to be, so the green robes won out.

***

Closing the space between her had the elaborate doorway, she grabbed hold of the knocker. With all the fortitude provided by her noble blood, she brought the knocker down firmly, twice. Her hand had only just returned to dangle by her side when the door was opened. A house elf greeted her with a deep and well-practiced bow.

"Good afternoon, Miss Black. Would you like to come in?"

The question sounded strange, since, why else would she be there? But it would be impertinent for a house elf to command a witch to enter. Bellatrix couldn't honestly remember seeing the house elf before, but she hardly gave them any attention, so that wasn't unexpected. It was, however, expected that house elves working for a family like the Lestranges would know who all possible guests would be. It was with a general sort of unkindness and upturned nose that she responded to the creature.

"I'm here to see Rodolphus. Is he here?" she replied as she was gestured graciously into a waiting room.

"Ah. He has only just returned from a walk. I will let him know you are here." With that, the elf summoned a plate of refreshments, and with one more bow, exited the room.

Bella surveyed her surroundings. Although she had been to the Lestrange estate many times before, she had never inspected it as a woman who might be living there.

***

Rodolphus Lestrange tossed his newly tarnished shirt onto the bed and turned towards the mirror behind him. It was time to assess the damage from his last raid. He, Nott and MacNair had been able to do a lot of damage to the muggle town before the aurors had arrived. The town was very close to some Wizarding dwellings, and The Dark Lord had noticed an improvement in relations between the two communities. That, of course, had to be stopped. They had gone in with disillusionment charms galore and disguised themselves as nearby wizards that the muggles would recognize. They proceeded to wreak havoc, burning houses and attacking the townsfolk.

The aurors had shown up, apparently protecting the muggles. How is allowing them to live protecting them? They hardly had a right to exist, especially in close proximity to wizards. They had to be vanquished for their own protection. They had to be vanquished for the protection of the Wizarding World. The aurors always had it wrong.

In the battle, Rodolphus had barely evaded a stunner to the chest thrown by that Mad-Eye-Mudblood-Lover Moody, and had received a shallow cut across his abdomen from who knows what stray curse. Pulling out his wand, Rodolphus cast a quick mending charm on the wound, and surveyed his muscular form for any further damage. There wasn't any. This of course wasn't surprising since Rodolphus spent much of his spare time training. Not only was he an adept magical duelist, but much of his success came from the agility he gained from physical training. The Lestrange estate, with its long walking paths, steep hilly fields and difficult forests, had become his training ground. His parents were coming on in years, and he had to take over control of much the estate, but he always reserved time to tone his battle skills. His wealth would serve the cause well, and had certainly allowed The Dark Lord to grasp control of many Ministry officials and resources. Rodolphus also knew that to succeed, there would be many gruesome battles ahead to purge the Wizarding world.

Many chose not to think of the war. He relished in it. The thought of fighting and using his cunning to gain control of all those who had strayed, or never belonged to, the Pure Blood wizard lifestyle was thrilling. It was what drove Rodolphus. He would gladly give up his life to better that cause, and fully accepted his duties as a Death Eater. He glanced down at his left arm and the mark that lay upon it as he pulled a clean shirt on. There was, however, one thing that kept him from being the brainless fighter like Crabbe and Goyle. Rodolphus had found something else living for. He desperately hoped that he would survive the war, not just so that he could see the Wizarding World at its finest once more, but so that he could live and start a family of his own to impart tradition upon.

He still hadn't heard from her. It had been driving him insane. Bellatrix had already made him wait a month for her answer. How much longer would she be? Rodolphus could feel his impatience seeping through every aspect of his life. He practiced dueling in a bitter and sarcastic manner. He looked on at every couple he saw with vicious envy. He struck out at muggles with loathing and cruelty. The Dark Lord couldn't complain, but many around him had. At every argument and turn, Rodolphus had to try to suppress his angry anticipation. Any other man who so much as mentioned her name in his presence was given a suspiciously jealous look that held a threat behind it. When Rodolphus had a goal in mind, he was seldom, if ever, parted from achieving it. If anyone he knew thought they could take his rightful wife away from him... With a sigh, he walked over to the closet in search of a robe without blood soaked through it. He had just clasped the robe when there was a knock at the door.

"Enter," he said in the exasperated and terse manner he had adopted the last month, waiting fervently for Bellatrix's answer to his proposal.

"Pardon me, Mssr. Lestrange. There is a Miss Black here to see you." The young man whipped around and stared down at the elf.

"Which one?" he asked disbelievingly, his eyes narrowing to sweep over the house elf, daring it to jest with him.

"Miss Bellatrix Black, Mssr," came the reply, followed by a nervous gulp. Obedience was a quick, difficult and lasting lesson in this household.

Clearing his throat and returning to face the mirror, Rodolphus replied, "I'll be there shortly." The elf bowed out and closed the door.

So this is it, he thought. She's finally come to reject me. She's going to tell me of the many suitors after her hand. But how could that be? Who was more qualified than he? His family was even wealthier than hers, and that was saying something. He was a talented Pure-Blood wizard who had excelled in his magic using. He had been sought after by all manner of females since he turned fourteen years old. There couldn't be another man better suited to be her husband. Maybe this was the doing of her meddlesome, pretentious mother. She didn't want another of her daughters to make a foul marriage to a man she deemed unworthy. He was anything but that. Maybe he was too French? Even though the Lestranges had been in France for centuries, there had been plenty of marriages with the British Wizarding community. He was almost as ethnically British as the Blacks, but had better taste in food. Well, I'm never going to find out just standing here, he thought with some finality.

Donning his Pure-Blood arrogance as a mask for his worrisome and churning insides, Rodolphus lifted his head and started off to the young woman he was completely intent on marrying.

***

How did Cissy talk me into this? was all Bellatrix could think. It's been a month since he proposed; he's probably given up on me. He's probably going to tell me he's already married to some French tart. It was with no small amount of agitation that she turned around at the quiet click of the door being opened.

Rodolphus paused. His eyes traveled over her beautifully shaped curves, which were draped in a dark green set of robes. She looked absolutely stunning. Surely, she wouldn't have dressed up this much if she were planning to turn him down. With a confident smirk forming across his face, Rodolphus shut the door, locked it, his walk turning into a saunter as he headed towards the young woman who currently controlled his life.

"Lack of schooling has been good to you, Trix," he said, giving her a surveying look that would have made any less willful girl blush furiously, and directed her to a comfortable chair. Bella was now really glad her sister had insisted on the lower-cut robe. This already seemed easier. How did Narcissa learn to trap a man with such perfect simplicity? However she had learned, the technique certainly worked.

"And now that I'm out of school, I have time for things I didn't before," she provided, accepting a goblet of wine that Rodolphus had offered with a swift but graceful hand gesture. The small grain of reassurance Rodolphus had been nurturing was now swelling, and he dared make the leap.

"Just things, or people as well?" he asked, finally sitting in the chair closest to her and picking up a goblet for himself. As she let the warm wine wash down her tongue and softly caress her throat, Bella glanced over at the man next to her.

"Yes, people as well," she replied, swirling the dark liquid around in her goblet and providing her suitor with an errant curve of her lips. "One in particular, even."

She turned so she was facing him directly, and celebrated the appraising look he was giving her in return. "I can't believe that you've waited for me all this time." Rodolphus started at the bluntness of her words. This worried her, and her eyes assessed him shrewdly. "You have waited, haven't you?"

"Of course! You're the only woman I could ever consider waiting for, which is the reason I proposed. Do you honestly think you are undesired? I've been ripped apart by jealousy. I was absolutely terrified you'd come to tell me that I was too late."

A pang of guilt strummed through her. It was very uncommon for a man of Rodolphus' stature to deliver an honest compliment such as that. In many ways, Rodolphus was just her second choice. One month ago, she had hardly considered accepting him, expecting to lead a life fighting as Bellatrix Riddle. The last few days had taught her a lot though. Rodolphus had now become someone she needed by her. Looking back on it, he had always supported her and shown more than casual interest in her life. He showed her more consideration than anyone else, and Rabastan always slipped in comments about him whenever they saw each other. The hard glaze to his eyes disappeared when he gazed upon her, and she could sense him relax when she gave him a hint of a smile.

Realistically, there was nothing for Bellatrix to complain about. She had realized that she did in fact have feelings for the man who had proposed to her, but they had been buried under the blind fervor she had created for Tom Riddle. The only way she'd survive the war was to have someone who would support her, and someone who would gladly accept love from her. Realizing that he was looking at her, waiting for her reply, Bella set her goblet down on the table.

"Your proposal was perhaps too early. I didn't realize what my feelings were for you until very recently. I do believe now is the perfect time, Rodolphus. I would love to be your wife."

Upon her declaration, he slammed his goblet down, leapt up, and puller her into his arms with months of pent-up anticipation finally being released. The first true smile in months crept across her face as she wrapped her arms around his neck and sank into him.

"You have no idea how long I've waited for you to say that," he said, uncharacteristically grinning into her hair.

"Oh, I do have an idea. Ever since I threatened to hex you during my fifth year when you snuck into the girls' dormitory and made that comment about how much I had grown up and filled out."

"I was hoping you'd forget that incident."

"Never. It will be my duty as a wife to hold it over your head and regale our guests with the story at every dinner party we ever hold."

"There are ways I can convince you to keep quiet," he whispered into her ear. It was with a cocky smirk that he lifted his head, challenging her to reply.

"Oh I do believe I will be the one holding control in that department, my dear man," she replied, raising an eyebrow with cunning arrogance only obtained through years of being a Slytherin female.

He glared down at her. "Yes, but then I'd have to retaliate with that story of when you decided the squid in the Hogwarts Lake was stashing some sort of treasure and swam in to find it."

"That's not all that bad. You have to admit I was only a second year."

"But I'd leave in the part where Professor Slughorn made the entire Slytherin Quidditch team jump in after you because he didn't think you knew how to swim. They lost the next game because they all had horrible colds, you know," he added with what was meant to be a stern look as he moved a lock of hair out of her face. This time, she did blush.

"How was I supposed to know he'd do that? They could have gotten a cold for another reason and we still won the Cup that year regardless. I suppose you could use it as a lesson why swimming in the Hogwarts Lake is never a good idea."

"Very true. But we're forgetting something." Rodolphus summoned a small black box as he went down to one knee in front of her. "Now, I'm not going to propose again and ruin the memory of the first one, as I'm quite unprepared this time, but, I would gladly place this ring on your finger, Bellatrix." This pronouncement was followed by a deep intake of breath as Bellatrix excitedly placed her left hand into his outstretched one.

His fingers wrapped around hers, and she could feel her hand being pulled forward. As he flipped the lid of the box open, her hand was slowly brought up to his lips. Her breath was caught in her throat as he smirked and kissed the top of her hand. He then drew her hand to his chest as he rose to stand in front of her. Rodolphus had a good few inches of height on her, and it only made his gaze more intense. His dark blue eyes held a fierce glow that seemed to come from a deep cavern that Bellatrix would normally only dream of. Reaching that cavern seemed a distinct possibility as his head dipped towards her and her lips were pulled into a kiss. It was everything Bellatrix had never experienced and had always desired. There were depths of passion, longing and strength. She was temporarily lost in the feel of it. She replied with surprising vigor. As she pulled his head closer with her hands, she felt his hand wrap around to grasp hold of her left once more. Somehow he had lost hold of the ring box when his left hand had begun caressing her hip. It lifted, though, and the spot felt suddenly cold. She could then barely sense both his hands on her left. It didn't matter though. She was kissing as if it was her life. And perhaps, at that moment, it was.

She felt, suddenly, the ring being slipped on her finger. A strong jolt sent them flying apart, yet it felt like he was still touching her, caressing her mind and body. Soft green rays of light swirled around her, stretching towards Rodolphus, and returning to circle her left hand. Although her entire body tingled, instinct told Bellatrix that the gleam in Rodolphus' eye no longer had anything to do with passion. The light finally swirled and seemed to disappear into the Lestrange crested ring upon her left ring finger. For a moment, Bellatrix just stared down at her hand. It didn't look like her hand had always looked. She felt something unfamiliar that's he couldn't place, like she was almost being watched. She looked behind her, but they were alone. She then sent a questioning gaze to her fiancée.

"Nice spell, isn't it, my dear?" he asked, satisfaction clearly etched in his features.

"What was it?"

"Straight to the point? Very well then. Although, it is something I like about you."

He was being evasive. Bellatrix was in no mood for her fiancée to be evasive. She liked having an amount of control over people. She knew Rodolphus was also strong-willed, but he'd have to learn now that she wouldn't accept much of what her peers did. She was a woman who would command respect from any man she chose to favor. Rodolphus' smirk didn't quite equate. She glared at him.

"You've been bound to the Lestrange family. That ring and its magical properties will provide you with protection. It will gain you access to many lucrative businesses and wealth. It will also inform me, as your husband, of any indiscretions on your part."

"You- you think I would be unfaithful?" she replied in indignation.

"A man's comfort comes from his lack of need to worry."

For the second time in her life, she slapped a man she had just kissed.

"How dare you? Did I not accept you? I made a commitment to be your wife and I intend to honor it. I also expect you to honor it in return. I won't put some deceptive spell on you, but I will find out," she informed, with her threatening manner that had brought out nothing less than groveling from any male she'd imparted it on.

Rodolphus felt that something had gone wrong. Yes, he cared for her. He also knew what kind of reputation he was expected to uphold. It wasn't entirely his choice to put the spell on her, and it was more of a formality than anything.

"I- look. It's a requirement. Even if it is completely unnecessary, and from what you've just told me, I'm sure there will never be any need for it, I have a duty to my family. It truly wasn't meant to be malevolent. One attribute of the spell, is that it only works if both parties agree to the same rules."

It wasn't a complete lie- he had vowed to himself not to dishonor her by seeking another woman's bed. That wasn't connected to the spell in any way though. He had to convince her somehow though, didn't he?

She relaxed and stepped towards him. "Today has just been so challenging. With all the thoughts that I had accepted too late, or what you would think of me, and then the thrill of actually being engaged- there are similar traditions for the males of my family."

Feeling things had been mended, he also took a step forward. He then waited for her to make a move.

"Don't ever trick me into something like that again, Rodolphus. You'll never get away with it." Her hand reached up to touch the reddened are of his cheek where she had struck him. After that, she grasped hold of the front of his robes, and pulled him down towards her face. "You'll also never regret being married to me," she whispered as she locked her eyes on his.

Before the man had time to respond or consider the implications, Bellatrix stifled any objections by capturing him in another kiss. This time, he held back none of his fervor, and Bellatrix knew she had made the right decision. Her dedication to the Pure Blood cause would never waver. She now had a beam of support and understanding in her life. She would no longer have to sacrifice all possibilities of fulfillment, because Rodolphus would always be there. She knew there would be late nights for both of them, impatiently awaiting the return, and possible death, of the other one. The dangers ahead of them held no import at the moment. Bellatrix lost her reservations in the kiss, and poured her passion into every second. Letting her mind abandon its worries for the first time in months, Bellatrix let herself succumb to the pleasure that came from accepting Rodolphus Lestrange.

***

Bellatrix sat down at her desk, exhausted. She had been wandering around for a few days, and now that things with Rodolphus were finally settled, she needed some rest. With a last glance at her beautiful engagement ring for the night, she walked over to her bed and welcomed the long-deserved hours of sleep that came almost immediately.