Draco's Draught

Promises

We cuddled all night, and shortly after sunrise, I fell asleep. When I woke, I kept my eyes shut, listening to Harry breathe. Then I realized that he was doing more than breathing. The sounds coming from him were sounds I had heard him make only twice before. The first time I had heard it had been in our second year, and the second the night before when he had given me my present. He must be speaking to Serica, I thought. I opened an eye to see her wrapped around his arm, looking at him intently.

It seemed almost indecent to watch him this way, but I couldn't help myself. If only he had been a Slytherin...the whole house would have loved this. I doubt a day would have gone by without someone asking him to do it for them. And maybe...but I closed that thought off. Instead, I watched amazed for several minutes before he finally looked my way.

He grinned. "I didn't notice you were awake."

"Obviously," I said, a near-smirk on my face. "What were the two of you talking about so intently?"

He was so cute when he blushed. Not like my unreasonable ones. "Well, I thought that since you can't speak to her directly, that she and we could work out some way for her to communicate with you, so that you can talk together when I'm not around."

I was astounded. "You can do that?"

"Well, maybe the three of us could, together. Would you like that?"

I grinned wider than I think I ever have before. "Yes. What do we do?"

We spent several hours at it, coming up with ways for me to ask her to "Go get Harry," or "Go back to the room," or "Come here." And there were her statements to me: "Hungry," and "Tired," and "Bored." It wasn't a lot, but it was more than I had expected. After we had worked out the statements, she was quite tired, so she went back into her basket, and for a few minutes, all Harry and I could do was grin at each other.

Finally, he stood and stretched, then went into the bathroom and changed while I changed in my room, and the two of us headed down to breakfast. The rest of the day was spent back in my room, talking. It was as blissful as I'd hoped it could be. And I could almost forget my father's appearance the night before.

Until Snape appeared, that is.

He knocked, then without waiting for a response, swooped into the room. He glared at us snuggled together on the bed, then gestured to Harry. "Out, Potter. I need to speak to Mr. Malfoy alone." He sneered. "I'm sure he'll come get you once we've finished here."

Harry turned to look at me, so I nodded, despite the knot I could feel in my stomach. Whatever Snape had planned to say to me, it wouldn't be pleasant. But it was going to happen whether or not I wanted it to, so it would be best if I just got it over with. Harry hugged me, then stood and glared at Snape. The two stood there for a moment, Snape still towered over Harry, despite the fact that Harry had grown quite a bit in the last year. Snape sneered down at Harry, and Harry glared up at Snape. Then he turned on his heel, and was gone without another word.

Snape turned to me. "You know, Draco, I always thought you had better sense than that. But perhaps your father is right. You do let your emotions control you far too much." His eyes narrowed, and he waited for a response. I swallowed to try to restore some moisture to my mouth, but said nothing. When he could see I was not going to respond, he shook his head. "Well, despite everything else, I am still your head of house, and you are still one of the most promising of our current house." He cleared his throat.

"I have just been up to see the headmaster, and we have agreed that if the potion were to wear off on its own, some sort of change would have shown by now. It has been almost two months, after all." I shrugged, but in my head, I wasn't sure if I should be happy or sad. As a girl, that would be one less hurdle for Harry and me to be together. But did I really want to be a girl for the rest of my life? "So," Snape continued, unaware of my internal conflict, "the headmaster and I have decided to try and counter the potion."

Counter? "But, Professor...you said when this happened...you said..."

"At that time, Mr. Malfoy, it would have been too dangerous. I knew very little about how the incomplete potion you had been doused with would react, and for all we knew, it would wear off quickly. But I kept a sample so that I could examine it. And since you seem to have been showing no changes whatsoever..." he looked at me coldly, "...Well, no positive changes, anyway...I have been researching to find a way to change you back."

I don't know, honestly, if I was horrified or hopeful.

He pulled out a small vial. "I was not sure how potent this needed to be, so you may need several treatments. If you have shown no signs of change by this time tomorrow, you are to come see me for another draught." He handed me the vial, and I shivered as my fingers made contact with the chilly container.

"Sir..."

Now, Snape has always been able to silence the other houses with a single look, but never before had I understood why. Now I did. The look in his eyes was nothing I had ever seen directed at me before. "Drink, Draco. Now."

"Yes, sir." I raised the vial to my lips, trying desperately not to gag as the foul taste slipped across my tongue and down my throat. I shivered again as I felt the potion go through me, like shadows on a bright but chilly day. I found myself crumpled on my bed, gasping.

Snape turned on his heel. "I will see you tomorrow, Draco." He strode from the room, and I was alone.

After several minutes, I managed to recover again and went to Serica's basket and picked her up. She wrapped lightly around my wrist and looked up at me. I gave her the signal we had worked out for her to go get Harry, and she uncoiled from my wrist and dropped to the floor, then disappeared from the room as well.

I sat on the bed, thinking as I waited. Did I want this? Did I want to return to the way things were before? But did I really want to stay female? From the beginning of this debacle, I had been miserable and moody. Not to mention the "wonderful advantages" of being a girl: boobs always in the way, menses, and everyone using me as a punching bag...well, not everyone. Harry was always sweet. But was that just because I was a girl? I knew what he had told me, but he was still the same boy who had been my enemy for years. Maybe my being a girl just brought out the Gryffindor in him?

I looked at myself in the mirror across from my bed. I had allowed my hair to grow these past few months, so that now it fell to just past my shoulders. My face was still the same. I hesitated for a moment, then stood and pulled off my robe, so I could better examine the other differences. Aside from that first morning, I had avoided looking in mirrors this entire time. An altogether un-Malfoy-like thing to do, but I had been quite unable to face the changes in my body at the time. But if I was going to decide, I had to know what I would be giving up or living with.

I had just reached back to undo my bra when the door opened. Horrified, I snatched up my robe, and whirled to see Harry standing there, flushing scarlet. "D...Draco?"

"Close the door!"

He hurriedly slammed the door behind him, never quite taking his eyes off me. He swallowed, still not stepping away from the door. "Um...why are you undressed, Draco?"

I flushed, then turned away, thinking how this must look to him. "I thought you would knock before you came in..."

"I was worried, I mean, Snape coming in like that, and then Serica coming up to tell me you needed me..." He gulped again, and I watched as Serica unwound from his wrist, dropped to the floor and moved to her basket. He cleared his throat and tried again. "What did you need?"

"Turn around."

"Huh?"

"Turn around, damn it! I need to put my robe on again, and it's kind of difficult to do that without giving you another show..."

I hadn't been able to look at him again since I'd turned away, so I was startled when he touched my shoulder. "Do...do you have to? I promise not to push, but..." his hands slid across my shoulders. We had touched each other under our clothes, but this was not the same.

I shuddered and leaned against him. "Harry..."

His lips were right next to my ear. "Would it help if I took off my robe, too? Make us even, I mean? We don't have to take off our underwear. I just..." he turned my face so that I could see his very green eyes looking at me intently. "I want to see you, Draco...and...I wouldn't mind if you saw me...if you wanted to, that is."

His breath was sending shivers across my skin. "I can't...I'm not ready."

He sat down on the bed and pulled me to him. "Draco, I just want to be close to you. To touch you. And feel you touch me. Please." He put his hands over mine, and pulled them away from where I clutched my robe, so that it dropped to the floor once again. "You're just so...lovely." His hands brushed across my shoulders and down my arms. "And soft," he smiled.

I sighed, and melted into his touch. "I..."

"Shhh." He pulled my face down to his, and we kissed. I loved kissing Harry. Every time our lips met, time disappeared, and all I could feel was him. He pulled me down to his lap, and held me as we kissed for several minutes.

When he pulled away, I couldn't talk. When I caught my breath, I spoke. "I just don't know if this is a good idea. Besides," I had to look away. He was far too distracting. "Snape came to give me a draught to help me change back. Would you really want to do this if I was...?" I couldn't continue.

"Draco, I would want to do this if you were puce with whiskers. I just want to be with you."

"But..."

His smile was so amazing. I never knew...I only wish I'd discovered sooner. "Draco, if you don't like what we're doing, I'll stop and leave, okay? No pushing. If those potions work, I just want to have something to compare you to." He winked.

I slid off Harry's lap. "I want this to happen. I want to be with you. All the way. I just...not tonight, okay?"

He looked at me. "So, should I leave?"

I looked at him, shyly. "No." I tugged at his robe. "Can I?"

He grinned. "Nope. You took off yours, so I get to take off mine." Then the smile softened. "Maybe next time?"

I could feel my cheeks go red, but I smiled. "Maybe."

He stood, and pulled off his robe, then quickly stepped out of his trainers and his jeans. He was beautiful. Six years of Quidditch had toned him quite nicely, and though it was winter, some of his summer tan still lurked under his pale skin, so that he looked almost golden in the torchlight.

He settled on the bed again, as shy as I had been. I reached out to touch his hand and our fingers entwined. I leaned toward him. He looked at me and our lips met once more. Our hands moved over each other's skin, caressing each other for several minutes before we managed to separate. We panted as we gazed at each other, our breathing filling the room. Harry reached out to touch me again, and as he did, my eyes closed. It was like the feel of raw silk along my skin, rough, but soft, and oh, so gentile.

I sighed, and reached for him once more. Our lips met quickly, but I pulled away and opened my eyes to look at him. "Harry?"

"Hm?" he was still looking at my lips.

"Harry, look at me."

He reluctantly looked up at me. "What?"

"Promise me that no matter what, you'll meet me here New Year's Eve?"

"Of course! You don't even have to ask."

"Even if I've changed back? And I want to..." I blushed.

"Even then," he grinned. "I'll look forward to it."

We spent a great deal of time that night just exploring each other. Much of the week was spent that way, with only slight breaks for food and for me to take my "medicine," after which I began to feel dizzy for longer and longer periods of time.

Then it was Sunday, and most of the students were due to return. Harry was called to a conference with McGonagall, but he promised that he would meet me in the hall for lunch. I had been feeling quite dizzy off and on since the last draught, so I stayed in bed until shortly before noon, and slowly worked my way downstairs, nearly stumbling several times. I made it to the hall just in time to see Professor Snape sit down at the teacher's table. He looked at me, and was soon on his feet, striding towards me.

"Mr. Malfoy, are you feeling all right?"

"I'm fine, Professor, I just need to sit down..." and then the world went black.