Three O'clock in the Morning

Three O'clock in the Morning

In the real dark night of the soul it is always three o'clock in the morning. - F. Scott Fitzgerald

Long Ears

A wise man has long ears and a short tongue. - German Proverb

"Wake up, sleepy head." A kiss.

"G'way, Moony...need sleep."

Laughter. "You've got to wake up, honey, or you'll be late for work."

"Don' have work, silly." Wait. That was the voice of a woman. A woman! A woman was in his bed!

Sirius sat straight up, immediately awake and attempting to take control of the situation.

Lily laughed again and kissed him again. "Maybe this is a good way to wake you up in the morning."

Sirius did not say anything in reply, only silently clawed at the bed sheets, trying to remind himself that Lily really was his wife. That Moony was not here. That he was married. That his marriage meant he could help Harry.

"I have your breakfast ready," Lily continued. "Remus stopped by and took Harry back to school already."

Sirius nodded dumbly, watching his wife leave the room and, he assumed, make his breakfast. No one had made him breakfast since his school days at Hogwarts. Not even Moony had, before Azkaban, claiming that Sirius needed to look after himself. At which point Sirius would always argue that he had looked after himself since he was fifteen, and was it too much to ask for help in not burning down the building? Then Moony would laugh, grab him in an impromptu hug, and then they would proceed to mutilate and destroy a bowl of pancake batter together. A single tear slid down his cheek before he wiped it hurriedly away.

"I will see him again," he whispered. "We were just getting things right again. I will see him. He will wait for me. If he could wait while I was in Azkaban, he can wait now. He knows more about the Veil and the Archway than anyone else."

"Honey," Lily called from the kitchen. "I know you're tired, but you need to eat breakfast before you leave. Oh! What's this?"

Sirius, his responses tuned from both war and prison, bolted to the kitchenette to see what was wrong. Of course, as the flat was neither war zone nor a place where nightmares lived, he quickly saw that nothing was particularly wrong with Lily, or the kitchen. There was no out of control fire, his Dark relatives had not decided to drop by for a visit, and there were not any corpses clashing with the pastel apartment walls.

"Oh, Siri, look," his wife whispered. "Harry wrote you a letter."

Indeed, Sirius saw, Lily was holding a folded piece of paper that read, in Harry's handwriting, 'To Sirius" and, in smaller but equally bold lettering, 'For Sirius' eyes only.'

"He hasn't written letters like these since - well, I can't remember when," she continued.

Sirius took the note from Lily and she returned to frying the eggs while he read his letter.

Sirius, (the note read)

Uncle Remus came to pick me up early today, as I am sure you noticed. I'm sorry you couldn't take me to school, but I need to get there in time for breakfast, especially after I tried to run away. I'm really sorry about that.
Then I remembered that you probably don't know how to get to the funeral home today. I'm really really sorry I forgot to show you the way over the weekend. I should have. I heard you and Dr. Snape working on the computer yesterday, so I'll just draw you a map because you know how to do most of your work now.

Harry

Below his name, Harry had drawn a crude map showing Sirius how to find the Black Funeral Home. Apparently it was on Main Street, while the flat was on Crabapple Road. Sirius smiled when he saw that his place of employment was within walking distance of his new home. He would not have to learn to use one of those Muggle contraptions, what were they called, automobiles. He had loved his flying motorbike, but magical motorbikes and normal automobiles were two very different things.

"Here you go," Lily said cheerfully as she placed a plate of fried eggs and a cup of black coffee in front of her husband.

Sirius felt slightly queasy as he ate his breakfast. He had hated eggs since he was a child, the mere smell of them cooking could turn his stomach, and he had never bothered to develop a taste for coffee, unless it was filled with sugar. Yet, he dutifully ate the meal, a habit left over from childhood and Azkaban: if he did not eat this meal, he would not get another. It never occurred to him to ask Lily to make him something new, and the closest he could come to cooking was pouring himself a bowl of cereal or making a pot of tea. Yes, he thought, I can make a mean cup of tea.

"Sirius, come on, you're going to be late," Lily complained, pulling Sirius out of his seat and practically shoving him out the door. "You're meeting with my sister in fifteen minutes; the least you could do is show up."

Lily watched her husband leave the apartment building, mildly concerned. Sirius was usually awake and gone by the time she awoke in the morning. Yet, today of all days, he had not only decided to have a lie in, but then act as if it were nothing unusual. Yes, Peter and Remus were right. There was something decidedly different about her husband - but what? People did not change like this overnight. Had something been going on for a long time, but no one bothered to notice?

Sirius was greeted at the door to the funeral home with a smile and a hug from his brother. He stiffened in his brother's arm, never having hugged Regulus before. Regulus either was oblivious or decided not to notice. Sirius had never been much for hugs, anyway. He thought they were girlish or some similar rubbish.

"I have grand news," Regulus announced with a grin.

Sirius raised an eyebrow.

"Sasha's having twins! I'm going to have twins, Sirius! Twins! Thebe is so excited about having baby brothers or sisters!"

"Well, it's going to be a lot to handle," Sirius replied. Regulus - in charge of small children! If this Regulus was like his brother, allowing him to mold the minds of the next generation was dangerous, very dangerous indeed.

Regulus frowned at his brother. "I know you aren't a big fan of children, brother, but you could bother to be happy for me."

Sirius' pale eyes met his brother's identical orbs. Regulus was hurt that he was not overjoyed about the good news, Sirius realized. In this world he and his brother were not enemies; they did not spend their hours and days plotting the downfall and demise of the other. Regulus had wanted to share his happiness with Sirius and Sirius had pushed him away, just as 'his' Regulus had done countless times when they were children.

"I'm sorry, Regulus," he said, wincing that he was apologizing to his brother. "I really do think it's wonderful that Sasha is having twins, I'm just feeling a little distracted today." Perhaps Sasha had taken the mean streak out of Regulus, or maybe this Regulus did not have it. He fervently hoped so.

Regulus smiled. Sirius was always distracted after Harry did something stupid. At least this time Harry had not seemed the worse for wear. He knew that deep down Sirius did care for Harry - the son of his true love and his best friend - but his brother did not know how to keep Harry from becoming another James. So he took the strictest approach possible, trying to make sure Harry had the order in his life that James had never had. Regulus hoped that Harry did not turn out like James, if only for Harry's sake, but he doubted that would ever happen. He had seen Harry and Draco protecting his daughter, Thebe, from everything from moving cars to school yard bullies and was sure that Harry had a sense of responsibility that James never did.

"Come on in then. We can wait in the parlor for Petunia and Vernon."

Sirius' ears perked at the mention of his in-laws. They were the scum with whom 'his' Harry lived.

"I still can't believe that that woman is related to your Lily," Regulus continued, offering his brother some hard candy from a dish. "I mean, they're mirror opposites. I sometimes think Petunia is half horse!"

Sirius laughed half-heartedly. "Why are they coming here again?"

"To pick out a casket for one of Vernon's relatives, I think. Died of a heart attack. Can't imagine why someone in the Dursley family would have high cholesterol," Regulus snorted.

Sirius remembered Harry and the Weasley's stories about the monstrosity Harry called a cousin and his equally large father. It felt good to join his brother's laughter. Merlin knew he had not laughed at anything for a long time.

"What's so funny?" Vernon asked, suddenly appearing at the door, his beady eyes flickering between the brothers.

"Just a family joke, Mr. Dursley, just a family joke," Regulus reassured him, not bothering to mention the fact that he was the joke.

"Very well," Vernon replied, not looking particularly convinced. "Where are the coffins?"

"Caskets, my dear man, caskets," Regulus chided. "Coffins sound like vampires and the nineteenth century. We carry caskets."

Vernon obviously could not see the difference between the two words and merely shrugged. "Lead on, then, man. I don't have all day."

Regulus gestured for the portly man to follow him, shooting Sirius a grimace before disappearing around the corner.

Sirius wandered about the funeral home for some time, acclimating himself to this new environment. In the end, he learned that it had a similar floor plan to 12 Grimmauld Place and that the 'office area' was where the kitchen should have been. Poor Regulus had been stuck in the backrooms with Vernon, whom Sirius could hear all the way from his office.

"That's ridiculous!" Vernon roared. Sirius privately hoped that the man was quieter at home and Sirius was then suddenly seized by a vindictive desire to return to his world to save his Harry from his oversized uncle.

Regulus said something, but Sirius could not catch the exact words, as his brother seemed to be speaking rationally to their customer.

"Petunia and I are practically family, you ingrate!" the walrus who posed as a human screamed. "Don't you have discounts for that sort of thing?!"

Sirius winced and closed the door to his office. He did not want to consider Vernon Dursley family (and not just because that meant calling Lily Potter his wife) and he certainly did not want to give the man a discount price on a casket. If anything, he wanted to charge him exorbitantly high fees for absurdly cheap materials. Sirius had not felt this malicious toward anyone other than Peter in a long time.

Bring!

Sirius jumped and stared at the plastic object that had let out the startling noise. Then he remembered Lily using it back at the flat and Severus telling him that it was a telephone, that you talked into the top part of it. Cautiously, he picked up the telephone.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Is this Black Funeral Home?"

"Er... yes."

Slowly, very slowly, Sirius began to find himself at ease with his work. Regulus worked with him in the office and they spent most of the day answering telephones. He managed to cover most of his major blunders and, when Regulus was with the others who worked in the funeral home, Sirius tried to read most of the informational books and pamphlets that were lying around the room. One advertised vacations in Wales, so Sirius dismissed that out of hand, but most were quite useful - instructions about computer software or the latest innovations in the business.

He laughed quietly to himself as he plugged information into the computer. If Moony and Harry could see him now, working like a regular Muggle, getting along with his family! But the very thought that had given him laughter immediately sobered him when he realized that he might never see Moony and Harry again. He could not imagine them not trying to find him, but the war took precedence over missing persons.

Maybe Severus would know what to do. Yes, Severus understood this world - for Circe's sake, he was from this world - and he still seemed to be similar to the Snape that Sirius once knew. Sure, this new man had a backbone and did not have the same taste for grudges and vengeance, but he had the same sarcastic bite, the same apparent lack of hygiene, and the vile feelings toward the Marauders that old Snivellus had. And, a voice in Sirius' head quietly added, he is your only friend here.

"Siri, are you okay?" Regulus asked, brows furrowed, as he hung up the telephone.

Sirius shook himself like a dog, as if he could shake off his loneliness. "Yeah, I'm fine, just thinking about some things."

"Well, would you think about them later?"

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "And why would I want to think about them later?"

"Because," Regulus clapped his hand to Sirius' shoulder, "we are going out to dinner tonight!"

"B-but Lily-" Sirius began. Could he really spend a whole day and a whole night with Regulus without remembering what 'his' Regulus had done? He had destroyed the dining room portraits last night because of a joke his mother told! Surely he could not go to a public restaurant!

"That was Sasha on the phone," Regulus explained. "She called Lily and they'll be waiting for us at the restaurant."

Sirius bit his lip. How could he avoid going out to dinner with his brother - and his brother's wife - and his wife - without looking like he was doing just that? "Where are we going?"

"La Patisserie. It's an Italian place." Then Regulus laughed. "What am I saying? You and Lily go there all the time."

Sirius nodded dumbly. There was no way to get out of this. He only prayed to the merciful powers above that he did not do something phenomenally stupid again.

"Come on, we don't want to be late," Regulus called as he pulled on his jacket.

Sirius only silently followed his brother, his face, for once, quite serious.