Harry Potter and Unexpected Beginnings

Chapter ten

Dinner that night was eaten in near silence. Ron and Hermione chatted about their day, involving Ginny as often as necessary, and having given up on trying to get Harry to talk. He was moody and stayed that way the whole trip home from Diagon Alley, as well as through dinner. He barely ate anything, pushing the kidney pie and mashed potatoes around his plate. Ginny had even tried to speak with him, and received nothing more than an occasional grunt in response.

"So, Ginny," Ron started, after finishing a conversation with Fred and George about their new line of exploding quills. "What did Dean want with you? You seemed pretty cozy with him on the street today." Harry tossed his fork to the plate, pushing it aside, causing the eyes around the table to turn to him.

"He asked me how my summer was going," she told them, glancing to Harry who stood suddenly and walked his plate to the sink.

"Most people don't snog their ex-boyfriends for asking how their summer was."

"I was not snogging him, and for your nosey information, he wanted to apologize for the way he broke up with me, and asked me if I thought we could make it work again."

"What did you tell him?" Harry asked, the first real sentence he had uttered in hours. He turned away from the sink, leaning against the counter and crossing his arms across his chest.

"So you're going to speak to me now?" Ginny asked, her brown eyes locking with his green ones. The silence rose again in the room, as Mr. and Mrs. Weasley stopped their conversation with Tonks and Lupin, staring at the two.

"You didn't answer," Harry told her softly, anger lingering on every syllable.

"What do you care? You've barely said two words to me since we left Diagon Alley. Besides, I don't think I owe you an explanation."

"Answer the question, Ginny," Harry demanded, his tone sharp as daggers.

"Why should it matter to you, what I said to him? It's not like we have any commitments between us, to interfere with what an old friend had to say to me."

"What?" Ron nearly choked on his pumpkin juice, as he took up an uninvited place in the conversation. "With all the snogging you two have been doing, you don't think there's a commitment? Are you mental?"

"Ron stay out of it," Hermione warned softly, watching the eyes of her best friend and the girl he loved, never once leaving each other.

"Why? It's obvious Harry's bonkers for her, and she's a nutter for not seeing it."

"Ron, be quiet," Ginny told her brother, standing up and walking toward Harry, standing a few feet away from him.

"Answer the question, Ginny," Harry told her in soft deadly tones. "What did you tell him, when he asked if you could work things out."

"Why do you care, Harry?"

"Apparently I shouldn't," he told her, his jaw clenching tightly. "I guess I shouldn't have assumed there were any real feelings in you. After all, you've had a different boyfriend every week, why should I be anything more than just a number to you." Ginny reached out and slapped Harry's face, hard, the smack resounding off the walls. He looked at her as if he hadn't felt the wrenching pain from her assault.

"At least I know where we stand, before either of us lost our hearts," he told her softly, walking away from her, and out the door. Ginny stood there in silence. Her hand hurt from she had slapped Harry, her heart breaking at his words. She tried hard to control her emotions, but couldn't contain the tears any further. She was angry and upset in a way she had never felt. She ran from the room, leaving the stunned observers to watch her departure.

"Bloody hell," Ron said softly, echoing the thoughts of the others in a mere two words.

Harry sat on his bed, in the room he shared with Ron. He was miserable. His cheek hurt, and his heart felt like it had just been ripped from his chest. The sounds of Phineaus echoed from the painting, causing Harry to glance up and see the old wizard standing quietly watching him.

"Rough day, Potter?" he asked, as Harry turned over to his stomach, folding his arms and resting his chin on them.

"Leave me alone," he ordered bitterly.

"Ah, female problems I take it. What happened? She get tired of looking at that scar?"

"No, she was snogging an old boyfriend in Diagon Alley."

"I see," the old wizard said, remaining silent for so long, Harry thought he had left. "Did she tell you she didn't want to be with you any longer?" he asked again after several minutes.

"She didn't have to. I saw how she looked at him."

"Potter, this is your first love affair, and you don't know how to deal with females, so let me give you some advice. Women like it when their man fights for them. They want to hear words of endearment and they want commitments that they can substantiate. Men don't care much for words, but women do, they have to hear them."

"Then she'll have to hear them from him. I don't have any for her."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Positive. Besides, she doesn't want to hear them from me, even if I did say them."

"I see. So I suppose that's not her across the hallway, crying her heart out? Sounds like a very heartbroken young woman, to me. But then again, things were different in my time. When a man wanted his woman, he'd fight for her. If it were I, I'd go to her and prove I was a better man. I'd take her in my arms and kiss her so thoroughly that she wouldn't even remember the other bloke's name."

"Well things are different now," Harry said sadly. "I can't fight for something I never had."

"So sure about that, are you? Told you that, did she? At the very least, you should demand to hear the words, so you know it's over. Otherwise, you'll never know what might have been." Phineaus sighed deeply, and then smiled to himself. "Well, I'd better go. Dumbledore's trying to get things settled before school starts day after tomorrow." Harry listened as Phineaus left the painting, before turning over to his back. He considered what the old wizard had told him, hearing Ginny's crying echo through his heart.

He didn't' know if he should go to her and comfort her, or if he should find Dean Thomas and throttle the daylights out of him. He was angry and hurt, and he just couldn't make his thoughts work for him. Slowly he sat up on his bed, looking out the window to the dark skies beyond. Feeling like this, he'd rather face Voldemort without his wand. What he wouldn't do to have Sirius right now. He needed to talk to him, and ask him what he was supposed to do. A few minutes passed by, before a soft knock sounded on the door. Harry glanced to it, seeing Lupin poke his head around the corner. He carried in a silver tray with a sandwich and a glass of pumpkin juice, setting it on the table between the two beds, than sat on the edge of Ron's.

"You didn't eat much dinner, so I thought I'd bring you a snack." Harry was silent as the two sat there, looking down at their hands.

"I thought she cared for me," Harry said, his voice breaking with the emotions that raked his insides. Lupin looked up and smiled.

"She does care for you, Harry," he told him gently. "Love is a very complicated thing. It's strong enough to withstand any storm, and yet fragile to the bitterness of emotionally spoken words. This is new to you Harry, and it's new to Ginny too. Right now you're both on shaky ground."

"She's had other boyfriends, Remus. There's nothing new for her about any of this."

"That may be, but Ginny's never felt love. Not real love. She may have had crushes, but that was different then what she feels for you. I know I'm not an expert at any of this, but I know when a young girl's heart is breaking. Go to her, Harry, talk to her. Tell her how you feel. I think right now there's a lot of miscommunication going on."

"I can't go to her. I have nothing to say to her, that she wants to hear."

"Have you ever told her how you feel?" Remus looked at the blank expression on his face. "Have you ever asked her how she feels about you?" Harry slowly shook his head no. "Then how do you know you haven't anything to say to her, that she wants to hear?" Remus sighed, offer the boy a soft smile "You're a true Potter, Harry. You're just like your dad. Did you know that your parents broke up twice before they finally made it down the isle? Your dad was so upset that Lily had male friends, that it was a constant fear to him that he would loose her. He hated it when she would spend late nights in the library tutoring students, especially if they were boys. They fought over it every time they got together. He loved her so much that it ate him alive, until he finally had the courage to tell her his true feelings. After that, Sirius and I swore they were locked at the lips." Harry thought about this for several long minutes, and then looked back at the man across from him.

"You know about the prophecy, don't you?" Lupin drew a deep breath, and nodded. "Do you think I have anything to offer her, that she won't end up regretting?"

"Take it from a man who has never known what love is, until recently. It's better to have a few moments together, to treasure forever, than a lifetime of regrets. Sirius told me that, shortly after he buried his wife and baby girl. They are words I've thought about every day since then." Lupin stood up and stepped toward the door, opening it and looking back at the boy struggling with his emotions. "You deserve happiness Harry, I know it, Sirius knew it, and your parents would want it for you. Don't let what may be, stop you from having what is." Lupin left the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

Harry sat on the bed alone for a long time. The light from the candles burned down, nearly complete, leaving the room in dim shadows. He sat with his head resting against the wall, his eyes focusing on the flames of the candles as they fought to stay lit. He was tired, his head ached and his heart felt numb. The crying from across the hall had stopped a while ago, leaving the upstairs in silence. He could hear the creaking to the wind as it blew gently across the rooftop. The sounds of children playing in a nearby yard echoed up through the open window to where he sat, unseen by the Muggle world.

The door to the room slowly opened, and Harry glanced up to see Ron peaking his head through. He smiled awkwardly at his friend, then walked further into the room. He sat on his bed, watching Harry stare at the candles. He wanted to say something, but he didn't' know what. He had spent most of the evening in the sitting room with his parents and Hermione, while Lupin and Tonks had gone out to take watch over the neighborhood. He had eventually talked Hermione into a cup of tea, and they sat at the kitchen table talking in a way they never had before. He had spent a wonderful evening getting to know his best friend, feeling guilty for being happy when his sister and his other best friend were upstairs miserable. He had walked Hermione to her bedroom door, and was delighted and amazed that she had kissed him goodnight. He was even more surprised, when the simple kiss she started to give him, had deepened and they found themselves, several breathless minutes later, wrapped in each other's arms, gasping for air.

"Have you talked with Ginny?" he asked her, seeing the emotion flicker across his friend's eyes. Harry didn't answer, he just shook his head no. "Hermione checked on her a while ago, and she told Hermione that she was miserable. She said she told Dean that she didn't want to be more than friends, because her heart belonged to you. She said she gave Dean that hug and kiss when he told her, you were a lucky bloke." Harry listened to the words, closing his eyes. He had come to that same conclusion a little while ago, once he sorted out his feelings and the events of the day. "I know I've been a real prat about you two, but honestly Harry, I think it's great you two are together. I've never seen either of you so happy before. You belong together."

Harry stood up and ran his hand through his hair, walking to the door. He didn't want to talk to anyone right now, he just wanted to be alone, to think. He opened the door and glanced back to his friend.

"Thanks, Ron," he told him gently. "But I really need to be alone for a while." He left the room and closed the door on his friend, walking to the stairs. He could hear Mr. and Mrs. Weasley talking in the sitting room, and knew he couldn't go down there, without having to talk with them. He considered going to the attic, but after seeing the light and shadows of the twins on the upper level stairs, he knew he couldn't go there either. With a sigh of reluctance, he chose to walk to the room across the hall. He opened the door, and stepped in. the room was pitch black, and he stumbled over furniture as he tried to make his way to the bed. Without hesitation, a light appeared by the bedside, encasing the room in a soft shimmer. Harry blinked several times, before his eyes could focus again. He looked at the red-eyed face staring back at him, from under the covers of the bed.

"Harry," Ginny said softly. 'I didn't know you'd be coming in here. I just wanted someplace to be alone. Hermione wouldn't shut up about her and Ron."

"Yeah, I know. Ron was pretty much the same way," he told her, feeling a twinge of guilt for not telling her the whole truth.

"If you want to be alone, I can go," Ginny said, starting to crawl out from under the blankets.

"No, it's all right, I can leave." Ginny caught Harry's eyes with her own, seeing the tears he'd cried still lingering on his cheeks.

"Please, Harry, stay. I don't know if I'm ready to talk or not, but I just realized I don't really want to be alone." Harry smiled, walking to the other side of the bed, and kicking his shoes off, before climbing under the blankets. He lay there like a stiff board, as Ginny rolled over, offering him her back. He could feel the heat radiating from her, and fought the urge to touch her. He couldn't help it, he loved her and he felt miserable without her.

"Do you still hate me?" she whispered, her voice echoing her heartache, her tears forcing themselves down her cheeks again, her tone cracking with hidden sobs.

"I never hated you, Ginny, I couldn't even if I wanted to." Ginny suddenly rolled over, throwing her arms around his neck, burying her damp face in his shoulder and crying openly. Harry wrapped his arms around her, soothing her hair from her face and down her back.

"I'm so sorry, Harry," she whispered. Trying to pull her emotions under control.

"I'm sorry, I should never have gotten jealous over your friendship with Dean. You are just friends, right?" Ginny nodded.

"He's your friend too, Harry."

"I know that, but I don't want to snog him in public." Ginny stiffened at his words, hearing the bitterness lingering behind them. She looked up, wiping her face with her hand.

"I wasn't snogging with him. I just gave him a friendly kiss and hug. There was nothing more than that."

"I still didn't like it," he told her, reaching up and brushing a few stay tears from her cheeks.

"Now you know how I've always felt, when you and Ron and Hermione have left me out of everything. I always thought you and Hermione had feelings for each other. I never would have dreamed it was Ron and Hermione who were in love."

"Hermione is just a friend, Ginny, and she's like a sister to you. I love her, but not the same way I love you." Ginny didn't miss the slip of his words.

"You love me?" she whispered. Harry swallowed hard, looking into her blood shot eyes, feeling a pull at his numb heart.

"There's a lot you need to know," he told her, pushing himself up to a sitting position. He reached out and tucked a stray hair behind her ear. "I have to tell you something, that happened last year." He drew a deep breath, looking down at his hands resting on the covers. "You know about the prophecy Voldemort wanted."

"It was smashed, and he never got it. Nobody ever heard it."

"Dumbledore knew about the prophecy, and told me after Sirius fell through the veil." Harry took a deep breath. Now that he was finally telling someone, it was as if a damn had broken open, all his emotions and thoughts from all those long weeks ago flowed to the front of his mind. "The prophecy told of a baby who would defeat Voldemort, but it didn't say it was me. Neville Longbottom and I share the same birthday. Voldemort made me his defeater, Ginny. He could have chosen Neville, but instead he chose me. Now I have no choice but to fight him."

"But you're not alone Harry. We're all behind you and we'll fight by your side, when the time comes." Harry shook his head softly, looking back to the blankets.

"I have to face him alone. The prophecy said I have to either kill, or be killed by him. Neither of us can live, unless the other one dies. I don't want to get involved with you, just to leave you to mourn my death."

"What makes you think you'll die? You're a great wizard Harry, you'll defeat him, and I know it."

"I wish I had your confidence, but the truth is, he'll use those I love the most to get to me. Ginny, you'll be first because I love you more than my own life. He knows I'll come for you, or avenge you. You're an easy mark for him, and I can't let that happen."

"Harry, I love you, I always have. I know that we were destined to be together, just like the inscription on your parents wedding rings," she lifted the chain from around his neck, fingering his mother's wedding rings. "In this life and the next, we will always be one. I know that in my heart, Harry, and I don't care if I have one day, or a million with you. I will never regret loving you...and I do love you, Harry, with all my heart." Harry sighed, knowing this was wrong, knowing that it was for her best interest for her to forget him, but he couldn't resist. He reached out, cupping her cheek in his hand, and leaning in to kiss her. As his lips touched hers, all doubt slipped away, he didn't care about tomorrow, all he wanted was her and now. He wrapped his arms around her, as she entwined hers around his neck. He laid her down to the mattress, his kiss deepening as she opened her mouth, allowing him to explore the dark recesses beyond.

Ginny moaned at the invasion of his tongue, causing the hair on the back of his neck to stand on end. He pressed his lips against hers harder, his breath coming in rapid succession. When his lips left hers to travel down her neck, Ginny was certain they were bruised, but she didn't care. She had Harry back in her arms, and that was all she could think about.

Harry felt the heat and hormones coming to life, rising to dangerous heights, forcing himself to pull away from her all too inviting embrace. He looked at her, clearing his throat, looking at the outline of her delicate body, beneath the thin, faded pink nightgown, her breast straining against the thin, faded pink material.

"Maybe I should leave, so you can get some sleep."

"Please, stay. I don't want you to leave. If I had my way, we'd never leave this bed again."

"Ginny, I don't know if you understand what being in this bed next to you is doing to me, but I'm not ready for this much right now," he told her, knowing she was aware of what he meant. "I want to be with you, and I do want...you know, just not right now. I'm still trying to get used to this whole love thing."

"And what makes you think, I'd let you go that far?" she asked him, her eyes holding an indignant expression. "I'll tell you when to stop, and if you don't, I'll conjure up a bucket of ice water and pour it on your head." Harry smiled, leaning his forehead down to hers.

"You might want to sleep with your wand under your pillow," he told her, kissing the tip of her nose. "You may need that ice water, if I can't stop."

"I have faith in you, Harry," she whispered. "You'll stop when I tell you to." She leaned into his kiss, pulling him down next to her. Harry groaned deeply, feeling the warmth of her breasts straining against the thin material of her nightgown, as she leaned against him, his arms wrapping around her slender waist.

"Harry relax," she ordered him, sensing his hesitation. "Even my brothers have seen me in my nighty before."

"But I'm not one of your brothers, and my reactions are a lot different than theirs would be."

"If you don't relax, I'll have no choice but to strip these clothes off and make you watch." Harry chuckled, leaning into her embrace, kissing her neck.

"I wouldn't consider that a threat, if I were you," he told her, capturing her ear with his teeth. "The idea is far from unappealing." Ginny blushed, feeling his lips travel down her throat to the neck opening of her nightgown. She wanted more, but she was suddenly afraid of how much more she wanted. Sensing her resistance, Harry wrapped her in his warm arms, nuzzling her neck, smelling the sweet aroma of lilacs and spring in her hair.

"Maybe we should just try and get some sleep," he told her gently. "I'm really tired, anyway." Ginny smiled, curling up in his arms and wrapping her legs with his.

"Harry," she began a few minutes later, certain that he had at last reigned in his hormones, enough to relax. "Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," he told her, kissing the top of her head.

"Are we okay again?" Harry chuckled, easing her out of his embrace and reaching in his pocket, pulling out the small package he had been carrying since he and Ron had left her and Hermione alone to try on their robes. He placed the small package in her slender fingers and watched as she struggled to sit up. She quickly unwrapped the package and pulled out a small, silver, heart shaped locket. She opened it and saw a picture of herself on one side and one of him on the other.

"This is so beautiful," she told him, as he helped her fasten it around her slender neck, allowing his fingers to trail down her back, feeling each vertebra in turn.

"I got it for my girlfriend," he told her, seeing the expression cross her face. "In case you weren't aware, that was a declaration of commitment. You are mine; you belong to me. Is that the kind of commitment that will allow me to punch the next guy you snog in public?" Ginny giggled, wiping the tears for her eyes.

"You'll look really funny punching yourself in the nose," she teased, curling back into his embrace again. Harry chuckled, fighting the sudden urge to roll her delicate body, beneath him. "I love you Harry Potter. And I don't care if you are the boy who lived, just so long as you're mine." Harry kissed the top her head and hugged her closer to him.

"I'm the boy who lived...for you," he told her, drifting off to sleep with his heart wrapped securely in her delicate little hands. He was happy, and nothing would ever make him feel anything else. Not even the thought of double potions with Severus Snape.