Forever in my Memory

Disclaimer: Harry Potter, Mine? Bwahahahaha...oh, you were being serious. However Marc Jonah and Dr. Benett are mine.

No. 4 Privet Drive

June 22, 1995

12:57 PM

Harry leaned on the doorframe of the kitchen, waiting for the dizziness to pass.

This is the second time today! Why am I so dizzy?

Petunia glanced up at her nephew from where she was clearing the table. She frowned when she saw him leaning listlessly on the doorframe. "Harry? Are you all right? Do you feel sick? Do you need to go to the hospital? Dr. Jonah gave me his telephone number in case something is wrong. He said that if you needed it, he could take you a magic hospital. Harry?"

Harry looked up at her, his eyes dull and lifeless. He shook his head slightly and began to walk away. However he had only taken two steps before he stumbled and fell to the floor. He caught himself and screwed his eyes shut.

Petunia gasped and ran to him. "Harry! Harry, what´s wrong? Speak to me! Please!"

Harry didn´t answer. He opened his eyes and looked at her for a split second, then slumped to the ground, unconscious.

Petunia grasped his shoulders and cried out, "Vernon! Marge! Come here, quick! Harry´s sick!"

The house shook as if a stampede had run through, as Vernon, Marge and Dudley ran to the kitchen. Vernon reached them first, Marge and Dudley at his heels. He glanced at Harry. "Petunia! What happened? Marge, go call Dr. Jonah, the number is by the phone."

Marge nodded and ran to the phone. Petunia had begun slapping Harry´s face, trying to wake him. She looked at Vernon, worried. "I don´t know! He was leaning on the doorframe for a few minutes, and then he started to walk away. He took a few steps, and then fell down. He just collapsed! Vernon, what´s wrong with him?"

Vernon just shook his head helplessly, and they waited for Marge to return.

*****************

St. Mungos, Rm. #36

June 22, 1995

3:37 PM

"Kill the Spare." Harry watched as Cedric´s lifeless body fell to the ground. He looked up. High pitched laughter filled the air and crimson eyes followed his every move. He turned and ran but still the eyes followed...

Harry woke with a start. He closed his eyes, panting. Another nightmare. I should be used to this by now.

He tried to rub his eyes but he couldn´t raise his hands. He looked down, squinting, and saw that he was tied down, with a needle taped to his right hand. The needle was attached to an IV. Harry frowned and looked around. The room was plain, with white walls and a window with pale yellow curtains to the right. His glasses were on a small table on his left. The bed was facing the door.

The door opened and a tall man with dark hair and a stern face walked in. He glanced at Harry and raised an eyebrow. "So you´re awake? Good, though you really need your sleep, Mr. Potter. I´m Dr. Benett. You are at St. Mungos Hospital. Your Aunt and Uncle and Dr. Jonah brought you in. You had collapsed in your home due to starvation and exhaustion. You will stay here for a while, until you are rested and you have gained at least 5 lbs. For now, you will be on an IV, as you can see, which is giving you the nutrients you need."

Harry gazed at the doctor without much interest. I don´t really care. I can have nightmares here as well as at the Dursleys. Well, at least if I´m on an IV, no one is going to yell at me for not eating.

He watched as the doctor left the room, sighing. He frowned. Wait, why am I tied down? I can understand the IV, but restraints?

Harry opened his mouth to ask the doctor, but then closed it again. What does it matter? It won´t change anything. It won´t change anything at all.

********************

St. Mungos, Waiting Room

June 22, 1995

3:40 PM

Remus watched as Sirius began another circuit of the private waiting room. Dr. Jonah, and Mr. and Mrs. Dursley were in another waiting room. Albus had only stayed for a few minutes, long enough for the doctor to explain what had happened, before heading back to Hogwarts. They had been there for several hours, waiting for Harry to wake up. When the owl from St. Mungos had arrived, Albus had been explaining about the Adaperio Acies, or Open Eyes spell. The spell forced the target, in this case, the Dursleys, to realize something that they had refused to see before. It forced the Dursleys to see that Harry was a good person.

Remus softly snorted. It´s about time. Albus should have done this a long time ago. It would have made Harry´s life easier, and maybe he wouldn´t be in the hospital now.

He looked up when he heard Sirius begin to swear. He frowned. "Padfoot, calm down."

Sirius paused in mid-step and glared at him. "Calm down?! Moony, my Godson is in the hospital, because he hasn´t been eating. He hasn´t been eating because he´s been depressed. We think he´s depressed because Voldemort is back, but we don´t know for sure because he won´t talk because he´s depressed. And you want me to calm down?! Moony, my Godson, my reason for living, for surviving every day, is hurting himself. How come nobody did anything to help him? Why didn´t his family help him? Why..."

"Sirius!" Sirius snapped his mouth shut, he had nearly been shouting. Remus took a deep breath and continued. "We are helping him. The Dursleys are also helping him, as much as they can. Harry has a therapist who is also helping him. He´ll be all right. But it´s going to take time."

Sirius looked at him with a heart-rending expression. "But Rem, what if he´s not? What if he´s not going to be all right? I... I´m afraid. I..."

Sirius closed his eyes and turned away, holding himself as if cold. Remus walked up to him and, placing a hand on his shoulder, turned him around. Sirius gazed at the floor. Remus studied him for a second. "Siri, what are you afraid of?"

Sirius looked up in time for Remus to see a lone tear fall. "I´m afraid that one day, Harry won´t be here. I´m afraid I´m going to lose him. Remy..." Sirius choked back a sob. "Rem, I don´t want to lose him. He´s my life."

Remus wrapped his arms around his friend, hugging him. "We won´t lose him, Siri. I promise, we won´t lose him. He´s going to be fine. Somehow..."

As Sirius broke into tears, Remus continued to whisper reassurances, and he did something he hadn´t done in years. He prayed. Harry. Please be all right. Sirius can´t afford to lose you too. I can´t lose you. We´ll help you. Please be all right. We love you.

**************

Rm. #36

Harry looked up from fidgeting with the restraints to see the door open and two figures walked in. His heart gave a jump as he recognized Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. Sirius is here? What is he doing, he´s going to be caught!

Remus looked around before smiling faintly at Harry. "Hello, Harry. How are feeling?"

Harry frowned and looked at Sirius. Sirius looked tired and worried. Remus, correctly interpreting the glance, replied, "Don´t worry. This is a small, private ward and everyone here knows the truth about Sirius. He´s in no danger. We´re more worried about you."

Sirius sat on the edge of the bed and gazed at Harry with an unreadable look, before speaking. "Harry? Why didn´t you tell me?"

Harry felt his eyes fill with tears as he looked up at his Godfather. I hurt him. I didn´t tell him what was going on, about the dreams and I hurt him. And now he´s here with me, in his human form in a public place. The ministry will catch him, and it will all be my fault!

Sirius cupped Harry´s chin in his hand. "Don´t cry. It´s going to be okay. I´m not mad. Please don´t cry."

Harry looked Sirius in the eye as he began to cry silently. Sirius hugged his as well as he was able, murmuring softly. "It´s alright, Harry. Don´t cry. Everything´s going to be fine."

Harry closed his eyes, listening to Sirius. But, it´s not going to be fine. I´ve hurt to many people. Because of me, Cedric´s dead, Pettigrew got away and Sirius is in danger. And now I´ve hurt Sirius again. He deserves better. I wish I was never born. I wish I was dead.