Visitor from the Future

Chapter 6: Learning to Trust Again

All around Harry was blackness. It surrounded him in a thick, heavy blanket. It was actually comforting. Much more so than where he had left. It had been years since Uncle Vernon had hit him so bad, and now, everyone was sure to know. Oh, God. Everyone knows. What will they say? How will I be able to face them? How... Harry's thoughts centered on those questions, causing him to feel embarrassment burn into him. They weren't supposed to know. They weren't supposed to find out...

For as long as Harry had been in the wizarding world, his childhood had been his most closely-guarded secret. He didn't want to see the pity, the compassion, and maybe even the disappointment -that the Savior of the Wizarding World couldn't even protect himself from a bunch of Muggles- and so, he had told no one. Even during his Occlumency lessons last year, those memories were what he really tried to protect. Not the dream-visions, not random thoughts, but those memories. And now, everyone knew, and would surely judge him for it, and would see his weakness, the weakness the Dursleys had been telling him for years was there.

Suddenly, the strange blackness Harry found himself in didn't seem so bad. Here, he wouldn't have to face anyone. No more Voldemort, no more "The-Boy-Who-Lived" crap from the rest of the wizarding world, no more nightmares, no more visions, no more nothing.

Just as Harry had begun thinking how nice it was in the blackness, a light shone in front of him, and all around him. The bright, white light had what looked like fine, golden sparkles or glitter running through it, and for some reason, the sparkles reminded him of the sparkly mist covering Nyx's outfit.

"My child."

Harry felt his breath catch in his throat. "Nyx?"

"Yes, my child, I am here." The winged woman stepped into view in front of Harry, her blue eyes somehow happy and sad at the same time.

"Where am I? Am I- am I dead?"

"No, my child, you are not dead, but in limbo. I know you don't want to go back, but you need to. You need to-"

"Why do I have to go back? I-I can't face them now! THEY KNOW! They can't- they can't possibly WANT me around anymore! I'M WEAK, Nyx! And now- now they all know that! I can't..." Harry's voice was hysterical, and he felt warm tears trail down his cheeks as he broke down in shame.

"Harry, they want you back. They are so worried about you, and they love you," Nyx's voice was soft and gentle, and she was standing in front of Harry, looking straight into his eyes, willing him to believe that he was loved. "Come, my child, I think this is something you need to see for yourself..."

The grey mist swirled around them, until they were standing next to each other in a large, open room, filled with beds, standing near the only occupied one. Harry recognized where they were immediately. He had been here enough times in the past five years to recognize it. It was the Hospital Wing in Hogwarts.

Surrounding the occupied bed were Mr. and Mrs. Weasley, Professors Dumbledore and McGonagall, Remus, Tonks, and Madam Pompfrey. Remus was near the head, holding one of the bed's occupant's hands, and Mrs. Weasley was on the other side, holding the other. Madam Pompfrey was talking quietly to the two professors and Mr. Weasley, but Harry's focus was entirely on the three people around the bed.

Tonks' normally cheerful and bright face was pale, and it was obvious the young Auror hadn't slept recently. Her normally brightly colored hair was waist-length, wavy and black, with dark mahogany highlights. Her eyes, which were puffy and bloodshot, evidence of her crying, were light blue-gray. As Harry looked at her, he suddenly saw certain Black family traits she had inherited from her mother, who was Sirius' cousin, Andromeda Tonks. She looked similar to Sirius, and, after a moment, Harry realized that she must be in her true form.

Mrs. Weasley's face was also puffy, and her eyes bloodshot, but she had on her face a look that Harry recognized well. It was the look of a mother, watching over her child. The one hand that was free was running through -My God, is that me?- the Harry lying in the hospital bed's hair.

Harry took a good look at the figure lying in the bed, and he couldn't help but gasp. His face was a mess, covered in bruises, which extended down past the neck, down onto his chest, which was a mess of bruises and cuts. From how he was laying, Harry could just make out the tape from heavy bandages that obviously covered his entire back. He looked dead. That was the only way Harry could describe himself.

What really made his heart break, though, was when he looked at the other person holding his hand. Remus' face was more drawn and haggard than Harry had ever seen the werewolf, and his eyes were filled with grief. As Harry watched, Remus whispered quietly to the boy on the bed, "Please stay with me, Pronglet. I can't lose you, too. Please, don't leave. You won't be alone, I promise..."

Harry felt something he had never felt before, even with Sirius. He didn't know the words to describe it, but he somehow knew, deep in his heart, what that feeling was. Remus sees me as a son. Not as a copy of Dad, or as The-Boy-Who-Lived, but as... as a son. Is that what having a parent is like? Having someone care for who you really are, not who everyone else says you are?

"Remus truly does care for you as a son, Harry, and he would do anything for you. If you only let him in." Nyx had stayed well out of the way, giving Harry privacy to see how those close to him were taking what had happened.

Harry took a deep breath, his eyes never leaving Remus'. "How do I get back?"

"Just listen to your heart, my child. Your heart will tell you what to do..."

Harry stilled, waiting for some way to get back to Hogwarts, to get back to his family.



It had been almost twenty-four hours since Harry had been brought to Hogwarts, and he had shown nothing indicating that he was getting better. Madam Pompfrey was worried about the three adults who hadn't left Harry's bedside, and was trying to get them to go get some food and some rest, promising that, if anything changed, she would immediately send for them.

Just as the Hospital Matron was beginning to lose her patience with Remus, who had flat out refused to leave his side, it happened. Harry squeezed Remus' hand slightly. Remus' breath caught in his throat, and he turned around quickly, and whispered, "Harry?"

Harry's forehead creased slightly, and his eyes struggled open. Remus couldn't stop from letting out the breath he had been holding as he saw Harry's bright, emerald green eyes turn and look at him.

"Moony?" His voice was scratchy and dry, and he was soon overcome with hacking coughs that shook the teen's entire body, causing a grimace of pain to flit across his face before he could stop it.

"Here, Mr. Potter. Have some water, dear. There you go." Madam Pompfrey had sprung into action, and had conjured a glass of water for the boy, and held it up to his lips when his coughing fit had stopped.

Drinking the water gratefully, Harry looked up, thanks written in his eyes, and leaned back against the pillows, obviously exhausted.

"Mmm... Can I go to bed now?" He was already halfway asleep, his eyelids fluttering closed.

"Yeah, Pronglet. You can go back to sleep now." Remus couldn't stop a slight waver from entering his voice, and he lightly squeezed Harry's hand to let the teen know he wasn't alone.

Against Madam Pompfrey's protests, Remus settled back into his chair, still holding Harry's hand, and slowly drifted off to sleep as well, reassured that Harry wasn't going anywhere at the moment.



A few hours, Harry awoke again, feeling much better, and not quite so sore. Looking out the window, he could see that it was obviously very early in the morning, since there was just a hint of pink tinting the dark purple sky.

Reaching over to the nightstand, Harry fumbled around for his glasses, and finding them, placed them on, and then painfully pushed himself up in the bed. Looking around, he saw Remus still in the same chair as before, but he was now asleep.

Hearing a sound coming from the entrance to the Wing, Harry looked over, and saw Professor Dumbledore walking in.

"Hello, Professor."

Dumbledore stopped dead in his tracks, and looked over at Harry. His normally twinkling blue eyes were sad, but they brightened slightly when he saw Harry.

"Hello, my boy." The Headmaster wouldn't look the teen in the eye, and Harry could sense the guilt the old wizard was feeling for leaving Harry in the care of the Dursleys in the first place.

"Do you want to sit down, sir?" Harry wasn't exactly pleased with the Headmaster, since he did feel some anger towards his former mentor for leaving him with his "loving relatives," but was more than willing to try and repair their relationship, although Harry would never trust the Headmaster like he had before.

"Thank you, Harry. I... I want to apologize. I have failed you yet again, it seems; more greatly than I had ever known. I had... I had thought Petunia's home would have been the safest place for you, but I have had it hit home quite hard that I was wrong these past few days. I'm sorry, Harry." Dumbledore finally looked Harry in the eye, and the Headmaster looked older than Harry had ever seen him, and he saw on the old wizards face true regret and sadness.

For quite some time, neither spoke, their eyes never leaving each other's. Finally, Harry sighed, and began to speak, his voice quiet and soft, filled with emotions that Harry had rarely shown others before.

"I-I can't just say that you're forgiven, sir. As much as I want to, I can't. I can't place all the blame on you either, since I had never said anything. You did the best you could, and, I suppose that's all I could ask for..." As Harry had spoken, he dropped his gaze, and by the end, he was staring at his hands, folded in his lap.

"Harry, I should have done more to help you. I should have checked in on you..." but as the Headmaster continued talking softly, tears trickling down his face, he quickly saw that the young man wasn't really listening to him, and knew that he wasn't the one Harry would confide in. Sparing a glance for the sleeping werewolf seated next to the bed, the Headmaster got up slowly. "I am sorry for leaving right now, but there is something that I need to do. I just wanted to check up on you Harry. Should you want to talk, my door is always open, but I will understand if you don't want to."

Long after the Headmaster had walked away, Harry remained as he was, seemingly studying his hands intently. Finally looking up, his green eyes were filled with tears, and although none fell, his raw emotions were clear from his face. Harry was lost, and didn't know who to turn to that he could trust. He wanted to trust Moony, but...

"Hey, Pronglet." Remus had just woken up, and saw Harry awake. Seeing the look on Harry's face, Remus scooted forward in his seat, closer to Harry. "What's wrong, Pronglet?"

"What am I going to do, Moony? Wh-Where will I go now? What's going to happen to me?" Harry's voice broke, and he was unable to stop the tears from falling down his cheek.

Remus got up, and sat down on the edge of the bed, wrapping his arms around Harry, mindful of the injuries Harry had sustained. Harry tensed for just a split second before giving in to his emotions, and he buried his face into Remus' slightly tattered and wrinkled robes, sobbing. The two of them stayed like that as Harry cried himself out, allowing all the fear, pain, and sadness that he had kept inside out, and clung to Remus, as though he was afraid the man would disappear. Remus whispered soothing words into Harry's ear, and he couldn't stop the tears from falling down his own face as he held the boy he had come to love as a son, a boy who was hurting so much, and was so desperate for someone, anyone, to help him.

As Harry's tears trailed off, he sat back slightly, and quietly muttered, "Sorry."

He probably would have continued if Remus hadn't said, "It's alright Harry. You needed that, I could tell. You're not alone anymore, Pronglet, alright? I promise."

Harry nodded slightly, and sat back against his pillows; Remus stayed where he was, seated on the edge of the bed.

"I got your letter, and I read it. Thank you, for trusting me, Harry." Harry looked up at Remus' face, and in seeing the support and compassion in the werewolf's eyes, he looked back down at his hands, and, taking a chance, began to talk.

He told Remus everything, from his earliest memories, living in the cupboard under the stairs, how the Dursleys would treat him, and basically all about his life up until he got to Hogwarts. Harry talked about his first year, about meeting Ron and Hermione, his reactions to how he had found out he was famous in the wizarding world; he talked about what he saw in the Mirror of Erised, the Philosopher's Stone, and going after it with Ron and Hermione. Harry talked about facing Voldemort and Quirrell down in the room with the Mirror of Erised, and about how he had stopped Quirrell from getting the Stone.

Harry talked about his first summer back, about Dobby and the pudding, getting a warning from the Ministry of Magic about underage magic, and about being rescued from Pivet Drive by Ron and the twins. Harry talked about his second year, and how everyone had thought he was the Heir of Slytherin, and about finding out he was a Parselmouth (someone who could talk to snakes). Harry talked about finding the entrance to the Chamber of Secrets, and going down there with Ron and Lockhart, and how Lockhart had come to have his memory wiped. Harry talked about going on and fighting the memory of Tom Riddle and the Basilisk, and how Fawkes had saved him from the Basilisk poison. Harry talked about finding Ginny down there, nearly dead because of Tom, and how he had gotten her, Ron, and Lockhart out of the Chamber with Fawkes' help, and back to Dumbledore's office. Harry talked about freeing Dobby from his masters, the Malfoys, and how Dobby had protected him when Mr. Malfoy had threatened him.

Harry talked about his summer before third year, and how Aunt Marge's visit had ended with him blowing her up like a hot air balloon because of all the bad things she had said about his parents, and Harry talked about how he had run away that night. Harry talked about finding out who Sirius was, and how he had thought Sirius was out to kill him. Harry talked about the Dementors on the Hogwarts Express, and meeting Remus. He talked about hearing his Mum's last moments when faced with the Dementors, and how he had even begun to hear his Dad too. Harry talked about meeting Sirius in the Shrieking Shack, and finding out the truth about Wormtail. He talked about when Remus had transformed, and Wormtail had escaped when Padfoot had protected Ron, Hermione, and him from Moony. Harry talked about how Sirius had offered him a place to live once his name was cleared, and how that memory was happy enough to help him drive off the Dementors when he had gone back in time with Hermione to save Sirius from the Dementor's Kiss.

Harry talked about the Quidditch World Cup, and what happened that night with the Death Eaters. He talked about the Tri-Wizard Tournament, and his name coming out of the Goblet. He talked about how much it had hurt when Ron had gotten angry at him because of it, and of how he had felt during the First Task. Harry talked about the Second Task and its preparation, and about the Yule Ball. Harry even talked about trying to find a date for the Ball. Harry talked about the Third Task, and what happened in the graveyard afterwards: about Voldemort's rebirth, Cedric's death, and the torture he had suffered at Voldemort's hands. Harry talked about the Priori Incantantum, and seeing the echoes of Cedric and his parents, who then helped him escape.

Harry talked about the previous summer, and the Dementor attack. He talked about his trial in front of the Wizengamot, and how Fudge had influenced the media against him, and how he had felt about that. Harry talked about his visions of the corridor in the Department of Mysteries, and about Umbridge coming to Hogwarts. Harry talked about his detentions for talking about what had really happened during the Third Task, concerning Cedric's death, and about the blood quill Umbridge made him use during them. He talked about his vision of Mr. Weasley getting attacked, and about Christmas break at Grimmauld Place with Sirius. Harry talked about the DA, and how the name had forced Dumbledore to flee Hogwarts when they had been discovered. He talked about his Occlumency lessons with Snape, and about seeing the memory from the Marauders' OWL's, and how it made him feel. Harry talked about his OWL's, and the vision of Sirius being tortured, and how he had tried to find out if Sirius really had been taken, and about being caught by Umbridge, and almost being subjected to the Cruciatus Curse by her. He talked about traveling to the Ministry of Magic, the fight there, watching Sirius fall through the Veil, being possessed by Voldemort, and being taken back to Hogwarts, where Dumbledore told him about the Prophecy.

Harry talked about the past few weeks, and how he had been so depressed. Harry talked about his vision on his birthday, about Nyx, and about what she had shown him. Harry even talked about what Uncle Vernon had done, and what he remembered from his rescue. Harry talked about seeing Nyx again, and how she had shown him how worried everyone was for him, and how, after seeing Remus, he had decided to come back.

By the time Harry had finished, the sun was fully up in the sky outside. Taking a sip of water to sooth his throat, Harry realized that he felt lighter than he ever had, like his burdens weren't so bad anymore after sharing them with Remus.

Remus had sat shock still through Harry's entire talk, and was barely able to form coherent thoughts; he had been that shocked to learn what Harry had really gone through. Realizing that Harry was watching him, obviously worried about what he would say after being told all that, Remus turned to Harry, and gently pulled him into another hug. "Thank you, Pronglet, for trusting me enough to tell me all that."

Harry relaxed into the embrace, assured that Remus wasn't going to pull away because of everything he had been told. The fact that Remus still cared about him went a long way to begin the process of Harry learning how to trust others once again. Pulling back slightly, Harry looked up at Remus. "Ummm, Remus?"

"Yeah, Pronglet?"

"You know how I told you about this new power I seem to have? Well, I need to start training, and I was wondering..."

Remus smiled slightly, and finished Harry's sentence. "...If I would be willing to help you out? Sure, Pronglet."

Harry smiled, then a confused frown graced his face, and he looked at Remus. "Moony, why do you keep calling me Pronglet?"

"Oh, you see, Sirius came up with the name after you were born. He had originally intended for it to tease your dad, but it was your mum it really teased, since she would just sigh and go, 'Maybe I should owl Professor McGonagall now to let her know that she'll have another Marauder on her hands in a few years.' Your dad actually loved the nickname, and when Lily wasn't listening, would start telling you all about all the pranks we had pulled at school, and how he was going to show you how to do some of the better ones." Chuckling, he looked down at Harry. He had a faraway look in his eyes, remembering all those years ago with just a pang of sadness at what had later happened to his best friends. He saw a small smile light up Harry's face; obviously he was eager to hear stories about his parents.

So, even after Madam Pompfrey had come to check on Harry, and had changed his bandages, Remus told numerous stories from the Marauder days, and about James and Lily both before and after they had gotten married and had Harry. Harry ate up those stories, and both of them felt closer to each other through talking about anything and everything that had happened to them. Harry had finally found what he had been looking for all his life: someone who cared for him, and who considered him family. Harry knew that there would be some bad times coming up, but now, he had Remus to go to when he needed, and Harry knew he would make it through anything, thanks to his new family.