Lily's Diary

Lily chewed on the top of her new eagle feather quill as she opened the oh so familiar velvet covering of her diary. She opened to the first blank page and began to write:

Dear Diary,

Its me again, bored...Sirius, Remus and ~giggle~ James are being the usual Maurderers. Except for the fact that I LOVE JAMES! But, you already knew that. So, I'm just going to have to write later because Mallory is looking over my shoulder and reading ever word I'm writing! Till later,

Love,

Lils

Lily shut her book and replaced her quill on her nightstand before turning around and seeing her roommate, Mallory, standing there, trying to look innocent, and not doing a very good job of it. "Geez! Git!" Lily said jokingly as she flung her scarlet pillow towards Mallory, who, thanks to her excellent Chaser skills, and, James' training, ducked. "Ha, nice reflexes," Lily rolled her eyes as she summoned the pillow and lied down on her bed and took out her Advanced Charms.

"Well, I'm off!" Mallory waved her hand as she headed down the staircase.

"Where?" Lily called.

"Thanks for checking, Mum!" Mallory laughed. "Down to the Common Room!"

Down in the Common Room, James and Remus were in the corner, discussing Remus' crush. "Remus! You have to tell her!" James urged.

"Why? She's just going to laugh at me!" Remus rolled his eyes. "I mean, I've known her since I was two...she doesn't think of me like that." Remus said, disappointed.

"Yeah, whatever," James said aggravated.

"Well, do you think she'll laugh at me?" Remus asked.

"Speak of the devil," James whispered under his breath as Mallory came walking towards them.

"Don't tell, whatever you do," Remus whispered back, before running up the staircase yelling, "Sirius!"

"Hey," Mallory waved at James.

"Hey," James said back while Mallory arranged the pillows as she sat down.

A few moment's of silence came when James suddenly asked, "So, what's Lily doing?" he asked excitedly, like a child on Christmas day.

"Writing in her diary," Mallory smiled mischievously.

"Anything about me?" James pressed on.

Mallory opened her mouth but Lily's words that she had said last week came back, "Don't tell him! Whatever you do! I would just die!"

"No clue," Mallory quickly lied.

James looked slightly disappointed when Mallory asked, "So, how's my Remie?" she smiled cheekily.

"Fine," James rolled his eyes. "Even though I really think you should tell him you like him."

"Right! Like my bud since I was two is gonna like me...whatever," Mallory waved the suggestion aside.

"That's how all the best relationships start ya know," James added.

"Then you and Lily should make the perfect couple!" Mallory teased. "I mean, you two are so close that it's sickening. Why don't you go up there and talk to her?"

"If you talk to Remus," James challenged.

"Fine...she's up in our dorm...Remus up in yours?"

"Yeah," James got up and walked across the Common Room and up the stairs to the seventh year girls' dorm as Mallory walked into his.

"Lils?" James poked his head in through the door. He heard the shower running in their private bathroom and decided to wait for her. He made his way over to her bed and lied down when something hurt his back. He got up to see a velvet book. Thinking that it was one of her school books, he opened it to a random page. He read:

Dear Diary,

It's official...I'm totally crushing on James. His perfect brown eyes and his messy hair...wow...well...I'm going to go to the Common Room...bye...

Love,

Lily Potter

P.S. wow that sounds really good!

James grinned as he heard the bathroom door creak open. He looked up to see Lily in Muggle clothes and her elbow-length hair wet and dripping. It was also very wavy, which was unusual for her because her hair was usually straight as a board. "Oh," she blushed. "James what are you doing up here?"

"No reason," James shrugged. She turned around to her dresser and James realized he still had the diary. Panicking, he stuffed it into his robes. A few moments of silence when Mallory came bursting in and said, "James-out! I need to talk to you..."

"About what?" Lily questioned.

"The Transfiguration test that you missed when you were sick. Don't wanna go giving away any answers!" Mallory said with false cheerfulness.

"Ooookay," Lily said, turning back to the mirror as James and Mallory exited the room.

As Mallory closed the door, she said, "OH MY GOSH! Your plan totally worked! Me and Remus are officially a couple!" she said doing a little dance. After she was done she asked, "What about you and Lily?"

"I didn't get to talk that much. She was in the shower," James explained.

"Oh well...okay. I'm going to go. I've got to tell Lily!" she said, jumping up and running through the door into her dorm.

As James walked across the hallway, he entered his dorm to find Remus talking animatedly to Sirius about something. And James could only guess what...He walked over and caught the words, "And she said she felt the same! So I asked her out and she said yes!"

"Great Moony!" Sirius said, patting his shoulder.

Remus turned on James. "James! Have you heard the story?" Remus asked excitedly.

"Yeah, Mallory already told me," James said as Remus looked slightly crestfallen since he didn't get to tell his story again. But, cheered up when he saw James examining a book. "What's that, Jamie?"

"I think it's Lily's diary," he said, not taking his eyes from the book.

"Diary?" Sirius said, his eyes getting wider.

"Yeah," James answered.

"You aren't supposed to take a girl's diary!" Sirius said. "It's like...their innermost thoughts and feelings! That's like...suicide...taking a girls diary! If Lily catches you then she's gonna kill you and that would blow your chances with her."

"How do you know all this?" James questioned.

"Because I used to steal my older sister's all the time," Sirius shrugged. "Now, open it! I wanna see this!" he said excitedly.

"I don't know...I don't think I'd feel right about it," James shrugged.

Sirius caught James off guard as he grabbed for the diary and dropped it. "Oops! Well, it just fell open."

The three grinned mischievously as they got down on their hands and knees and crawled over to the open diary. Sirius read out loud:

Dear Diary,

Hi, its me again. Nothing too much going on, just got back from the Common Room. James and I talked for HOURS. Well, okay one hour but its all the same. Wow, I think I'm starting to like him. Weird huh? I always thought of him as a brother, never like that. I always thought that would be weird if we ever started to date. Not that he likes me or anything or that I have a SLIM chance. Especially when every other girl here likes him. Well, I'm getting myself depressed. Haha. Well, I'm off.

Love,

Lils

James was in awe, she liked him back. All he had to do was find the perfect way to tell her. But, he never got to think about that because the door quickly opened. The three looked up to see Lily. "Hey have any of you seen my diary..." She trailed off as she saw the open book and the three boys looking at it. "NO!"

"Lily!" James shouted, "Let me explain."

"No James!" Lily screamed. Then, pointed her wand at the diary summoned it.

"Lily, I'm sorry," James said, getting up and going over to her, trying to get her to look up at him.

"I thought you were different. I trusted you," Lily's eyes started to spill over with tears as she turned on her heel and ran out of the room.

"Boys," James said to Sirius and Remus behind him. "I think we have majorly screwed up."

Sirius and Remus nodded in agreement.

Lily, blinded by tears ran, slightly tripping up the stairs. She burst into her room, flung her diary onto her bed and ran to the bathroom.

Mallory and their two other dorm mates, Cindy McKnight and Sandy McKnight (twins) looked at her.

Mallory got up and made her way to the bathroom door. She knocked hesitantly and heard Lily's sobs.

"Lils?" Mallory called, opening the bathroom door. She turned to find Lily sitting on the counter, used tissues all over the floor.

Lily looked up, then quickly looked away. Her face was red, and her green eyes were puffed up. "What happened?" Mallory asked, sliding up on the counter beside Lily and putting her arm around her shoulders.

There was a faint knocking at the door, then opened a crack. "Everyone decent?" said a familiar male voice.

The person slid his fingers through. Lily yelled in rage as the door opened to reveal a sorry looking James Potter. "Lily, can we talk?"

"About what?" Lily asked.

"The diary, if you would just let me explain," James asked, his eyes begging.

"Good BYE James," Lily said in a this conversation is over tone.

James got the message and left, saying a hurried goodbye to everyone.

When he left, Mallory and Lily went outside where Cindy and Sandy were talking, seeing the troubled Lily, they hurried over. Lily told them the story. After she had finished, she exclaimed, "What a jerk! I don't know why I ever liked him. I don't like him anymore...that's just it."

And, with that, Lily grabbed her diary and leaped off her bed. She ran down to the Common Room. She saw James, looking pathetic, sitting against a wall in his favorite spot, by Remus and Sirius. 'Good, I'm glad he looks pathetic,' Lily thought to herself as she made her way to the fire. James got up, but a menacing stare from Lily kept him standing where he was. He just watched her as she chucked her diary in the fire, standing there for a minute or two, she watched it burn.

"Lily! Why did you do that?!" James yelled across the room.

"Because that diary was all about you! And how much I liked you! Oh wait, you already know since you READ it!" Lily yelled back, making the whole Common Room go silent.

"Lily! Don't you like me anymore?" James said.

"Do you see my diary, burning in the fire?" Lily asked. James looked there and saw it. He nodded. "Well, that's what I'd like to do to you, right now," she said, barely above a whisper. Then, turned and ran past Mallory who was coming down the stairs. She joined the three boys on the floor.

"I'll take that as a no," James, looking crestfallen, slid back down against the wall.

"Hi," Mallory waved, sitting beside Remus as he took her hand.

"Mallory! Can't you talk to her for me?" James asked.

"There isn't anything I can say. It's all up to her," Mallory said.

James felt the last bit of hope of making up with Lily disappear.

Up in the dorm, Lily was sitting on her windowsill, looking at the crisp November afternoon. She was alone, Sandy and Cindy had gone to the kitchens to knick some food.

Lily decided to take a walk. She momentarily thought of asking if James wanted to come with her. Oh how she loved their afternoon walks, which they never shared with anyone else. Just their time. "Well, screw that," she said to the empty room.

"Screw what?" Mallory asked, coming in.

"James."

"Oh...Lils, aren't you ever going to forgive him?" Mallory pleaded. "I can't go between the two of you anymore."

"Why should I?" Lily spat, taking a picture of James off of her bulletin board and tearing it up.

"Because he is down there, looking completely pathetic. And, you love him and you can't live without him," Mallory said quietly.

"James! Just tell her you like her!!!" Sirius screamed, catching the attention of some first years passing by.

"She doesn't like me. Didn't you hear the comment of wanting to burn me like the diary in the fire?" James retorted.

"Yes, but your question was: Lily, don't you like me anymore? Am I right?" Sirius asked.

"Yes," James responded.

"Well, the whole wanting to burn you didn't say that she didn't like you. Just that she was mad at you," Sirius concluded.

"Sirius, I'm pretty sure she doesn't like him anymore...I would take the comment of wanting to burn him as that she hates his guts," Remus said out of no where.

"Thanks guys, but, I'm going to go for my walk," James got up and went out the portrait hole.

"Lily, can't you just be friends with him?" Mallory begged.

"No! Do you not understand? If I do forgive him, then it would be too weird. I wouldn't know how to act around him, and he would think I'm just a stupid girl for liking him!" Lily shrieked, hurling a pillow across the room.

"I see..." Mallory concluded.

"Well, hey, thanks for the help, but, I think I should work this one out on my own," Lily smiled as she got up and walked out of the dormitory. She spotted Sirius and Remus in the corner and waved, before exiting through the portrait hole.

She stepped out into the crisp late November afternoon. She turned left and went by the greenhouses, then by Hagrid's hut, and then to go sit by the lake. But, she already found someone sitting in her and James' usual spot. Of course, it was James. She went behind a nearby tree, but, as she was about to walk back to the castle, she tripped over a root. She screamed slightly as James came to see who it was.

James recognized the straight red hair. "Lils! Are you okay?"

"Yeah, thanks," then, looking at her knee. "Oh man! Look! I tore my robe!" She pointed to a long tear that ran up her leg.

"Did you hurt yourself?" James asked.

"No," Lily got up and dusted herself off.

James put his arm around her shoulder and said, "Are we okay?"

Lily wiped a tear from her eyes. "James, I have been completely horrible to you. You don't deserve to be treated like that. I was a prat."

"No, I shouldn't have had your diary in the first place. But see, I accidentally read one of the pages when I came in there to talk to you earlier. I found out it was your diary and I stuffed it in my robes when you came out of the bathroom," James explained.

Lily smiled weakly, "It's okay."

The two walked back to the castle in comfortable silence. And, James conveniently forgot to take his arm from her shoulders. But, neither one of them seemed to mind.

When they got back to Gryffindor Tower, Lily smiled at James, hugged him around the middle, and ran up the stairs to her dorm, where her three dorm mates were waiting.

James made his way to his two friends, still sitting in the corner. "What happened?" They asked eagerly.

"We're friends again," James explained.

"I thought you two would be going out, ya know, the whole arm over the shoulder thing..." Sirius said.

"No, I think it will be a long time before she likes me like that again," James said. "But, for right now, being friends is good."

December came and went and before they all knew, it was Christmas holidays. "Whoooooo!" Sirius erupted, as he set about a dozen Filibuster Fireworks all over the Common Room, scaring to death all the students under fourth year.

It was Christmas Eve and everyone's spirits were at an all time high.

"So, Lily," Sandy asked up in their dorm. "Do you like James still?"

"Yea...I never really stopped. I guess," Lily shrugged, as she signed 'from Lily' on all of her gifts that she was going to give to her friends.

"Can't you still tell?" Cindy told her sister. "She always stares and giggles and flirts around him."

"Shut up Cindy," Sandy said quickly.

That night, at midnight, Lily crept out of bed. She put Mallory's gift at the foot of her bed, Cindy's at hers, and Sandy's at hers. She crept out the door, with three more presents, one each for James, Remus, and Sirius. She shut the door and turned around to be face to face with James. "Merlin's beard James!" Lily whispered. "You scared me."

"Sorry," James grinned his lopsided grin that made Lily's knees go weak. "Well, Happy Christmas," he handed her a square box wrapped in purple paper with a gold bow.

"Thank you James!" Lily said. "I'll have to open it tomorrow, last, though. Save the best for last...haha."

James smiled, "What do you have there?" he nodded towards the three packages.

"Oh, this one is for you," she handed him a package. "This one for Remus, and this one for Sirius. Would you mind taking them in there for me? I'm terribly tired."

"Yeah, no problem," he grabbed the parcels, "Happy Christmas Lily," and with that, kissed her quickly on the cheek and ran to his dorm.

Lily went back to her bed, feeling blissfully happy, and fell into a peaceful and content slumber.

"Happy Christmas Lily! Happy Christmas Lily!" The twins screamed on either side of her ear. "Wake up!"

"I'm awake, I'm awake," Lily grinned, then, seeing the many parcels at the foot of her bed, jumped up and grabbed them. A half hour later, wrappings strewn all over their once neatly organized room, everyone was blissfully happy. The four girls were lying flat on their beds, looking over everything they got, and joking merrily. "What did you get from your lover boy Jamesie?" Mallory teased.

"I got my present last night," Lily said under her breath. But, said out loud, "I'm opening it right now."

She tore off the purple paper and golden bow to find a-

"A diary!" Lily shrieked, taking it out of the box. It was beautiful. James had obviously tried to make it himself. He cut out pictures of the two of them and pasted them on the front. But, in the middle, was a picture of them last night, when he had kissed her. Another when they came in from their walk with his arm around her. One of Lily hugging him around the middle, her head against his chest, and his hands behind her back, hugging her back. One of the two of them dancing on night in the Common Room when James had begged Lily to teach him to dance last year. And, her all time favorite, the two of them laughing.

Lily opened the diary to see James' handwriting on the first page:

I love Lily. I love Lily. I love Lily. I love Lily. I love Lily.

Dear Lily, hi, It's me. I hope you like this diary I gave you since it is partly my fault that you no longer have one. I also want to ask you something. I would like to ask you if you wanted to be my girlfriend. If 'yes' come down to the Common Room and sit beside me, if 'no' then don't.

All my love,

James

Lily was crying, she had never received such an amazing and thoughtful gift. She grabbed it and ran down to the Common Room. She saw James, who was sitting with Sirius and Remus on a couch, but Lily noticed an empty spot beside him. She ran down the stairs and sat beside James. She put her arms around his middle and kissed his cheek.

James smiled, he hadn't been expecting this. He smiled as he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her closer. "Thank you," Lily whispered to him.

"I love you..." James said in reply. Then, with his free hand, he reached into his pocket and pulled out mistletoe. He put it over their heads and Lily smiled as her lips brushed his. James put his hand down, but Lily noticed the mistletoe was still up there. She looked questioningly at James. "I charmed it to follow you around," James smiled, wiggling his eyebrows up and down.

Lily blushed and leaned her head on his shoulder as she looked at her diary once more. She asked, "James, how did you get this picture on there?" she pointed to the picture of James kissing her last night.

"I came in there later that night," James explained, smiling.

"Happy Christmas James," Lily whispered.

"Happy Christmas love," James grinned.

For it was, truly, a very Happy Christmas...