Dreams Don't Die

~It hurts to say good-bye ~

Tables overturned and chairs went flying as if they were weightless. The cracks of wood against wood filled the air and the shouts of one who had lost his mind could be heard cutting into the night. The door of the little house was open. The door to the small bedroom was hanging pitifully from its hinges, pulled off them by the same person that was now ravaging the living room. The face showed no signs of its former beauty. It was twisted with anger- no, pure hate, and weakened by worry. Sirius stayed no longer than two minutes in Peter's little hut. He knew now. He'd seen for himself that Peter had not been taken by force. Peter was alive, oh yes, for now.

What mattered now were Lily and James. Maybe- just maybe it wasn't too late! Perhaps it he was mistaken. But in his heart, though he would never admit it, he knew, though.   And it ate away inside of him.

He ran to his motorcycle.

~~*~~

She was awakened by the door. It opened and closed several times during the night. She could not imagine why. True, Lucius kept strange hours, but this was unheard of. She shook the remaining sleep from her head and stepped gingerly out of her four-poster antique bed. It was hers alone. Lucius occupied another room down the hall. Her feet hit the floor and she shivered at the coolness of the wood.

Now, she could make out voices. Yes, quiet ones. And more than one or two. The clock, ticking away quietly on the wall, told her that it was 2:00 in the morning. She hurried to the door of her room. Nothing good could come at this hour in the morning. Nothing good could come of her husband and his- his friends. All filthy Death Eaters.

She came to the top of the huge stairs that curved down to the impressive front door. The elaborate railing hid most of her, but allowed her to peer down at the guests. The word was used loosely. They certainly weren't HER guests. If she had had the choice, they'd never be allowed here! They stood near the door. Four of them. Death Eaters! She shivered and scooted closer to hear what they were saying.

Lucius was speaking, "It's done?"

Another Death Eater, a nasty man named Nott, spoke. Narcissa could hear the pleasure in his oily voice, "Oh, yes. Peter himself told me. Oh, yes, he succeeded in becoming the secret keeper and handed them over."

Narcissa's mouth opened in a silent scream. No, no- he couldn't mean-

"The Potters are gone, then!" Lucius sneered. "I knew that rat was good for something! Betrayed his friends...maybe he IS a Slytherin at heart."

Narcissa's ears were buzzing painfully. She steeled her heart and vowed to hear the rest.

"Peter seemed a bit worried, though. Wouldn't settle down. Kept saying something about Black..."

"Sirius Black?" Lucius inquired.

Narcissa let out a strangled sound and pressed her face painfully against the metal in order to hear every word.

"Oh, yes, well, he seemed to be looking over his shoulder, waiting for him to pounce on him," he laughed as if Sirius was powerless to do anything of the sort.

"We'll take care of Black," Lucius answered. "I have other reasons...personal ones...for wanting him dead."

Her heart stopped. Her eyes watered and the tears flowed out swiftly, but silently. She tried to move, but found that her legs would not support her.  She couldn´t feel anything except for the numbness in her heart.

"But, Lucius," another man named Macnair continued, "we gave Peter a few- uh- pointers. He'll get rid of Black for us. Besides," he laughed suddenly.  A cold, cruel and ironic laugh, "no one knows that our little rat was the secret keeper! We'll frame it on Black!" he chuckled again. "Isn't that priceless?! Sirius Black, rotting in Azkaban forever, tortured by the fact that he's innocent and that we put him in there!"

The others joined him in his glee. Narcissa fainted dead away, sinking to the floor rather than falling.  The cool floor claimed her and the laughter surrounded her body, spiraling up to the uppermost points of the house so that nothing was left uncorrupted.

~~*~~

He could hear their cries. They called out to him as he flew on his motorbike. Oh, yes, the voices filled his head. Voices of pain, of suffering, of sadness. And his heart echoed with pangs of guilt.  It was his fault.

His fault.

 And they were gone. What did he have to live for? Hadn't he truly lost everything now?

The smoking remains loomed over the horizon. So much pain hit him that it just numbed him all over. The house. The one he knew so well! Could this be the same place where he had played with Harry in the backyard? Where they had had drinks and talked about the good times? Where they had invited their future murderer? Oh, how it could not be the same!

He landed, rougher than he ever had before. He hated to walk on the ruins. He hated even more to think that his best friends were entombed in them.

Dead.

He shook the thought from his head and pushed on. Some of the house still stood. The top floor was gone, collapsed onto the first floor. The structure left threatened to fall any second. He took a step, unsure of what to do.

Then everything fell down. Watching it fall with his very eyes, knowing that everything was gone, he lost it.

"James, Lily! James!" he cried at the top of his lungs and continued to shout even as he felt his voice failing him.

"Harry! James! Lily!...Please!" He rushed into the ruins, heedless of his own safety. The bedroom...there was the charred remains of the bed. They'd got it at an auction...Lily had been so pleased...the memories hurt more than he could bear. Something sparkled and he bent down.

Glasses: James' glasses. He gripped them and saw, to some surprise, that they weren't broken. He clutched them for a moment and then gathered his will. James was around here somewhere. He never went anywhere without his glasses. He was nearly blind without them.  He pocketed the glasses.

He found James. Yes, there he was. Under the bed and some other rubble. Sirius couldn't look at him; it was too painful. But he had to. He had to know it was real...his friend was dead. No, not his friend, he had been a brother- a soul mate.  He closed the staring eyes gently and touched his shoulder.  A cry stopped his reverie. 

Could anyone survive this?!

He followed the sound, for he knew what it was, though his ears were dull and his brain reeling. It was a baby.

Harry!

He found him by Lily. She looked so beautiful, so perfect and peaceful! He touched her cheek and promised that he would get revenge for her. Harry, upon recognizing his godfather, stopped crying and jumped into his arms. He then looked down at his mother.

"Ma?" he reached for her hair and twirled it in his fingers.

Sirius cried again. Harry patted his head and that made him cry harder.

"Dada?"

"No, Harry," Sirius choked. "Mummy and Daddy are- are-" he broke into sobs, clutching onto the last Potter as he did so, as if he would hold on forever.

There was a flash and the Knight Bus appeared on the street. A huge man stepped out, already bawling. Sirius watched him approach.

"Sirius!" Hagrid shouted with great sorrow, then he saw Harry. His eyes popped and he clutched his heart. "Is tha'- can it be?!"

Sirius looked at the child in his arms. "Harry," He said, as if to convince himself. "Harry- he, he survived. Lily and James are gone." He looked away.

Hagrid enveloped both of them into a hug and he sobbed, "You-know-who got 'em! I'll I'll kill 'im! I'll crush 'im with my bare 'ands! But Harry, Harry's alive! I've got to take him to Dumbledore!"

Sirius pulled back in horror and clasped Harry to his chest protectively "No!" he cried, "No!" His words were feeble, but he could not do justice to what he felt.  How could they take his godson away?  How could they take away his life?

Hagrid looked shocked.

"He- he's all I have left, Hagrid! He's, he's the only thing I have to live for!"

Hagrid was stricken, "I'm sorry, Sirius," and he sounded like it. "But, but I have to take him to-"

Sirius understood then. More than Hagrid knew. Dumbledore and everyone else thought he had betrayed Lily and James. He did have nothing to live for. Harry would be taken care of. He kissed Harry on his head and handed him over to Hagrid.

"Take my motorbike- it's faster."

"But-"

"Take it! I won't be needing it anymore..."

Hagrid was very worried. Sirius was looking far off and very strange.

"Sirius-"

"Go! Before the Muggles come!" Sirius used an engorgement charm on the motorcycle so the Hagrid could fit. He then turned his back.

Hagrid watched him for a moment and then mounted and flew off. As the remains of the house faded away, the last thing he saw was Sirius kneeling down beside the body of his best friend.

~~*~~