The Fusion Paradox

Chapter Two: Here Is Gone

I'm not the one who broke you
I'm not the one you should fear
We got to move you darlin'
I thought I lost you somewhere
But you were never really ever there at all

And I want to get free
Talk to me
I can feel you falling
And I wanted to be
All you need
Somehow here is gone

Hermione had been sitting at the the walnut desk for hours, lost in thought. Her book lay open in front of her as she stared at it with unseeing eyes.

It had been exactly a year since she had stolen off in the middle of the night, leaving Harry sleeping unsuspectingly as she left in the dark hours before dawn. It had been his birthday yesterday and she thought briefly of the circumstances that landed her in this situation. Her face flamed slightly. She sighed and shifted her position, finally giving in to the temptation to slump over the table, burying her face in the pages of the book before her. She inhaled the smell of ink and the thought crossed her mind that it must be very weird to like the smell of a book.

Draco had thoughtfully supplied her with a pile of books when she had first arrived a month ago, weary and exhausted from her travels. As she eagerly devoured the books which her self-exile forced her to forgo, she found that new ones appeared as quickly as she had finished with a batch. At first, it bothered her that Draco might be spending so much on her as his guest but then she surmised that it must have come from his collection when she saw the fantastically huge bookcases filled with books of every imaginable shape and size in a large room beside her assigned one. It was in this room that she spent her days wandering about in, recuperating from the exhaustion that the frequent travelling and hiding had given her.

However, whimsy struck her that day. She had selected a few books and brought them to her room instead. It was here that she was now in contemplation, murmuring a belated apology to the book that she had not given her full attention to (which was amazing, considering her almost all-consuming passion for them).

Thinking about Harry made her face colour again. She thought of what had happened between them and what her gut reaction was upon realising what they had done. She was terrified at the change in the dynamics of their relationship, terrified at what she had wrought. She knew how both her best friends felt about her --- it would have been laughably funny if she didn't. She stifled a small smile as she remembered how ridiculous it had been when the two boys had tried to compete for her affections in what they thought was an inconspicuous manner. Bursting out inelegantly in snorts, she recalled their question about her sexuality. Not that it was any of their business, but she gave in and told them. Because they were her best friends. Because she loved them both, perhaps not equally at times, but didn't want to upset the delicate balance of their relationship. And now her worst nightmare had come true.

Which brought her to seek Draco's help.

She never thought that she could ever tolerate being on good terms with someone who had insulted her for much of her Hogwarts days, much less be close to him. But after Voldemort's demise, she found out that one could not just cut ties with someone whom she, in an inexplicable way, shared her mind with. Whenever she sensed that Draco was feeling out of sorts, anger and rage warring in his mind, she would unobtrusively find a way to talk with him.

And Draco, being the git that he could be, would hurtfully try to drive her away. Not that it made a bit of difference --- she had already become aware that Draco was only using words to shield his vulnerability. Since she would just give him a baleful stare whenever he tried to lie to her, he finally gave in and became as brutally honest as he could. He evidently thought that would drive her away. It only made her determined to strip the complex layers off the man that he had become. Perhaps she could help him heal and overcome the self-hatred that was threatening to consume him after his parents' demise. It gave her a clue that he subconsciously needed her when it dawned that he never tried to shut her out of his mind, the way she had when she felt threatened by either Harry's or his thoughts.

It was this same "save the world" complex that had led to her involvement with Neville on the Hogwarts Express so long ago, and then, with Harry. She had always had a weakness for people who seem to need help. At first, it looked as if Ron would resent her for becoming close friends with Harry as well. He would demean her. They argued so often that it was almost a staple in their interaction. Which was why it somewhat surprised her that he became jealous when she went to the ball with Victor Krum in their fourth year. Although perhaps it shouldn't have --- love was the emotion most akin to hate. Not that she thought he hated her, it was just that sooner or later, all those extraneous feelings would grow into something else. Or maybe it was just that neither he nor Harry had ever seen her in a different light other than that of their bookish friend. Figures that it had to take someone else paying attention to her for them to notice that she was of a different gender.

She sat at the writing desk of her room and mused on the thought that Draco had just taken her in when she came back, no questions asked. She knew that she could not stand to see either Harry or Ron yet. When she had first left, it was her intention to make it seem like she had dropped off the face of the earth. In truth, she went to many different places, staying incognito by using a variety of disguises.

She had prepared for this by casting a familiarity spell on her apartment to allow a specific someone access to it and owling two friends: George, so that he could check on her place once in a while, and Neville, who could take care of Crookshanks and her plants. Sending those owls had been a risk. She had found out through various sources that Harry and Ron had left the Quidditch world amidst much commotion, only to become Aurors. Their move had truly surprised her. She didn't know what to say or what to think. It certainly made it harder to hide.

It seemed at times that she was only moving a step ahead of them. When she went abroad to a go to a mystical mountain called Mount Banahaw in a remote island nation in Asia, Harry had requested to be assigned to Asia as well. She switched to Luxembourg but then he also transferred nearby, choosing an assignment that brought him there. She wondered if this was happening despite the shielding that she had so carefully cast so as not to project her thoughts to either him or Draco. He and Ron often worked in tandem, when a particular assignment needed two Aurors. It was like a game of cat and mouse and it had worn her down. She had stayed in almost twenty places during the past year, living in fear of discovery.

She had always known that she wanted a measure of independence in her life; this made her decide to try living life as a single woman. Mythology had always held a certain fascination for her and Artemis seemed like a perfect role model. It wasn't that she had a disdain for men, it was just the emotional dependence on another person that made her shy away from pledging her life forever to someone. She had come to that conclusion after seeing so many of her friends hop from one relationship to another. Commitment to just one other person for a lifetime was no longer a highly held ideal, and she did not want to take a risk.

Hiding behind a very busy career was a good enough excuse as any. Of course, her loving parents were quite disappointed to see that they would not be having a grandchild in the near future. But that had not stopped them from loving her unconditionally. Neither did they intrude in her private life. She supposed she was one of the lucky few to have such supportive parents.

Up until now, she had not felt ready to test the new dynamics of her relationship with her two best friends. It was that certainty of things forever changed between the three of them that had caused her to flee. After so many years of wanting to keep everything on an even keel between them, to make sure that their friendship would last, she had decided not to be put into the position of having to choose either of them. That delicate balancing act had worked perfectly well until the night of Harry's birthday. A night she would never forget.

She had given him the gift of herself. She felt a stir of arousal upon remembering the events in his bedroom but just as quickly quelled it. And then her thoughts sent her crashing back to earth.

That one night had destroyed the foundations of a carefully nurtured relationship between the three of them.

It was a wonder that Harry and Ron had stuck together despite what had happened. It reinforced her belief that she made the right decision in leaving --- at least the two of them had stayed friends. Whereas if she had stayed, she would have caused outright hostility between them. It would have cast a shadow upon a relationship with Harry. And she did not want anything to come between their friendship as a trio. With her out of the picture, at least they had each other.

She was glad to find out that Ron had finally started to date other girls. In fact, he was currently seeing a girl named Carla. This brought a smile on her lips, a smile tinged with sorrow as she sent out a silent apology to Ron for having hurt him badly by what had happened.

But nothing would surely compare to the hurt she had caused Harry. She remembered feeling the surprise and then frantic worry that he felt when he woke up and saw that she wasn't there. He had not bothered to shield his thoughts from her and she had to be careful not to transmit anything to him, even as she felt the full range of his emotions. Her loss had driven him to a path which he had not previously chosen to take. Still, Hermione felt a bittersweet kind of pride at knowing that the three of them were in the same profession now, together again...almost.

She would have to return soon. Her leave was already up.

It was then that she felt Draco coming nearer. He was already in the apartment. She stood up, saw him looking at her from around the door and felt his concern for her. It touched her to know that he was willing to give her the time she needed. No demands, no explanations. She hugged him and projected to him --- I'm fine. Thanks for asking.

************

Draco felt Hermione's arms around him and stiffened a little. He had not expected the hug, nor was he aware of what prompted it. He was quite careful about showing any affection towards Hermione. She had been the only one who saw through him during the lowest moments of his life and it bothered him at times that she had given so much of herself. He purposefully made himself relax and gingerly put his arms around her. He thought at her, Why is it that you feel so comfortable with me?

She grinned and thought back, Aww, you may look like you're an ice queen but you're really just a pussycat. Besides, you're just about the safest guy to be with.

Well, they had differing opinions on that but he let it pass. The role of the gay best friend, he thought sardonically and his eyebrow quirked upwards. That's a new one.

She shrugged and thought humorously, At least I know it's just a front.

Draco smiled against her hair and mockingly thought, Why is it that if you dress well, wear something that smells good and take some pains with your appearance, people automatically assume that you're gay? Now if they just assumed I was bisexual, things would be different.

Are you? she rested against his arms to look at his face. He just gave a slight smirk.

Well, you were asking, why the 'gay' tag? she raised an eyebrow. When you're more beautiful than half the female population...

He pretended to pull at her hair and while she struggled half-heartedly, laughing silently at him, he stilled her by trapping her arms against her body with his arms.

A month ago, an owl had arrived at his apartment with a mysterious letter. He was to meet with someone with regards to some information about his assignment at the time. He took some precautions in case it turned out to be a trap. Armed with some of the most complex spells available only to those who had undergone training as Aurors, he walked into the tavern in the seedier parts of London. He sat down in a corner booth and waited until the informant was ready to show himself. A figure in oversized clothing approached him and he readily discerned the glamourie that the other person used as a disguise. However, it still surprised him when the person sat down and removed the spell... to reveal Hermione. He should have known.

Among the three of them, it had seemed that Draco had the strongest talent for shielding. The few times he had done so when he, Harry and Hermione practised secretly, they had noticed that he could block more than they could. Harry was able to shield whenever he didn't want them to be aware of his more private thoughts but his shield sometimes leaked and the other two would secretly trade glances to confirm that they had "heard" what he was thinking. Sometimes it was something as innocuous as weariness after a Quidditch match when everyone in their old school came at the games to watch and cheer him and Ron on. Even though he was tired, he would pretend not to be and still agree to go out with everyone for a celebration after a win. However, for the more dangerous ones that tread on thoughts of skin and silk sheets, she herself blocked them out while Draco would cheerfully try to remove her shielding so that he could tease her evilly about it.

So it was to him that she turned to for help when she became weary of running. She had known that it was only a matter of time before Harry found her as her shielding had become very thin and stretched out after a year of constant exhaustion from hiding. Draco used his talent to shield her. A month in seclusion at his apartment, right under Harry's very nose, had helped her to recover.

He turned her so that he could look more closely at her, peering into her eyes as she calmly accepted his scrutiny. She had mostly kept to herself and this was the first time she had openly expressed affection towards him. It seemed that she was doing better.

He crushed her in a stronger hug and felt her do the same. It was a relief for him that she was gradually returning to the old Hermione he knew, strong and independent. It had alarmed him that when he first saw her, her skin had been pale to the point of translucence and she was alarmingly thin. Now, Draco was inordinately pleased to note, she had regained the bloom in her cheeks. Even her hair had returned to its previous unruly state.

His mood was shifting toward dangerous grounds. There was only so much a man (even one who was a wizard) could do when he had an attractive witch in his arms. He slowly took a deep breath and groaned inwardly when all it did was to make him aware of the smell of vanilla and wildflowers from the shampoo that she used. He gradually loosened his embrace, held her at arm's length and projected to her: Harry just came back.

She nodded, indicating to him that she was aware of it.

She left the circle of his arms and walked toward the kitchen, automatically preparing a sandwich for him to take to work. He sat on a kitchen stool as she went busily about. When this routine had first started, he wanted to tell her not to bother but he sensed that it gave her a sense of purpose to do so, and in a way, expressed her gratitude to him. Not that he wasn't as curious as hell about why she felt she had to leave and where she had been --- but that was her call.

He felt gratitude for her help in the past and that was what made him support her this time around. However, it seemed that this gratitude business went on and on and on...it could get pretty tiring. Sometimes he wondered whether it would have been better had he been the old Draco --- a snobbish, mean, petty little...ferret. He shuddered at the memory. It would have meant that he would not have this altogether good friendship with Hermione and it made up for everything.

Draco was surprised when she started making two sandwiches. He quirked an eyebrow at her curiously and she cleared her throat and spoke in a voice hoarse from disuse, "I'm coming back to work today."

************

Hermione felt a shiver of fear run up her spine as Draco parked his gleaming black Harley-Davidson in the parking lot of the inconspicuous Auror division building in the middle of Muggle London. She took off her helmet and shook out her hair, handing it to Draco as he removed the key from its ignition. He took it from her and watched appreciatively as she stood there, blinking in the sunlight.

It was probably the way she looked at him in a friendly manner --- perhaps the only girl who did not devour him with her eyes. He removed his helmet in one smooth move and tucked it in the crook of his arm while he held the other helmet in his hand. He kicked the small lever that parked the motorcycle and gracefully swung his leg off to land on the ground. He strode off, following Hermione through the revolving doors and into the gray building with an indiscernible facade.

He almost ran into her as she came to a sudden stop in front of the twin doors at the end of the fake main lobby, which served as a front for the real one. He looked at her curiously, noting her shallow breathing and the pale cast of her skin as she looked at the door, her hand stilled on its handle. Her eyes were wide with trepidation and he had the sudden urge to yank her inside the doors just to get it over with. He suppressed his violent impulse and waited for her to speak, to think...anything but the silence that seemed to have cast a spell over her. He knew that she could get past the worst of it if she just willed her feet to move.

Her lips had suddenly gone dry. She licked them and swallowed hard. She stole a glance at Draco, who was leaning on the side of the archway, his eyes looking at her sternly. Well, what are you waiting for? he asked telepathically.

She felt like screaming at him...anything to release the tension coiled inside her belly. She said furiously in a low voice, "I'm going! Just give me a bit of time to work my nerve up."

He snorted and said a rude word, which made her eyes widen in surprise.

"Think some more than you already have and your feet will have you running out of this place faster than I can say 'Boo'."

"You just don't know," her breath came out in short nervous puffs, "how scared I am --- about how Harry, Ron and the others will react once I step in that door."

He laughed mirthlessly at her. Tough love time. "What about what they would do to me once they find out that I've been sheltering you for a month? Aren't you afraid they would pummel my handsome face to a pulp?"

"You're prettier than you are handsome," she said automatically. "Why don't I just try this another day?" She was poised to flee.

"Oh no, you don't." In one smooth move, he opened the door on the right and shoved her in, closing the door behind her. She stumbled inside the lobby (which was designed to remotely look like one of the house common rooms at Hogwarts, with a high ceiling and couches), and straightened up promptly, looking at the stunned surprise on every face. Susan looked in wide-eyed shock at her and promptly dropped the sheaf of papers she was carrying. Elia, the witch-in-charge of the South American desk, didn't even wince when Neville's books dropped on her foot. Ron, who had been talking to Susan, gulped and just stood there, his jaw hanging loosely open. And Harry...

Harry's face was carefully blank.

Harry felt his mind race, crossing the whole range of emotions. His initial shock at seeing her had travelled rapidly from relief to happiness to anger. He felt his face drain of blood as he got over his initial shock.

She was here. She was here. She really was. Here.

And his brain was playing like a broken record.

He made sure that his face would not show the inner turmoil he was experiencing. He waited until she moved and started following her. Ron muttered his excuses to Susan (who was too stunned to say anything back) and started following Hermione as well.

Hermione started walking towards the office of the liaison Aurors for Muggle affairs. As soon as she walked through the door, her officemates stood up in shock and hurriedly cleared out when they saw Harry and Ron following behind her. She shut the door, clenched her hands behind her and leaned on the door. Harry and Ron stood there, waiting for her to compose herself. She took a deep breath and opened her mouth but before she could speak, the door was suddenly wrenched open and in walked Albus Dumbledore.

Harry and Ron automatically reached out to steady Hermione, who had stumbled from the force with which the door had been opened. She was in a state that heightened her sensitivity to rejection and she noted sadly that they let go of her as soon as she regained her balance.

"Oh, I'm very sorry, Hermione," Dumbledore said gruffly. "I received your owl yesterday about reassuming your position and I wanted to welcome you back formally." He bowed slightly in her direction and proffered a hand. She took it gratefully, like a lifeline tossed to a drowning man.

"Thank you, Albus. I am happy to be back."

Dumbledore nodded his head to the other two people in the room and said, "I trust that Harry and Ron have already informed you about working as Aurors. They decided to undergo training almost a year ago and are currently assigned, in their rotation, in the International Affairs division under Sirius. They will be assigned to different divisions this week --- depending on their next preference."

Hermione sucked in her breath sharply and went to one of the filing cabinets, opened the second drawer and pulled out a folder, taking it with her to her table. She riffled through the sheaf of papers inside it and looked for a specific heading in one of them. She gave an inward sigh of relief when she noted that Harry and Ron had both finished their stint in her department. She smiled brightly at Dumbledore and said to him, "I'll be reporting to your office as soon as I finish up a few things, Albus. Thank you for the warm welcome."

Dumbledore waved goodbye to Harry and Ron and went out of the office. As soon as the door closed with a soft click, Hermione turned to face her friends and found two faces staring back stonily at her.

************

Draco had his ear pressed next to the door and then, after a moment, felt like kicking himself for forgetting that the doors were soundproof. Hell, everything was soundproof in the complex. He waited a few more minutes before he opened one of the doors and sauntered into the lobby.

The real lobby was designed in the manner of the common rooms at Hogwarts, on a larger scale. Perhaps the architect had from Hogwarts. A lot of those who worked at the Ministry came from Hogwarts, and felt right at home. The lobby was where, if one stayed there long enough, all the people who worked at the Ministry would pass by sooner or later. The interiors were done tastefully in colours of warm hues; grey runners ran tastefully along orange European stucco walls. Pale yellow rays from sun filtered through the skylight. It added just the right touch of drama to the surroundings without any melancholic effects. Couches were scattered all around, and there were cups on the tables from the last occupants. Draco gave a slight sigh. Hermione's entrance had evidently caused quite a stir, as there were usually people hanging out here. The area was deserted. He speculated that they were probably talking about it in their respective departments. Frankly, it surprised him that Dumbledore had not told anyone else the reason Hermione gave for her sudden leave of absence to forestall any rumours from flying about. Surely he had his reasons for doing so.

Albus Dumbledore had been the Minister of the Ministry of Magic for more than four years already. He had accepted the position after Voldemort was finally defeated. Cornelius Fudge had been given an early retirement, due to his blind denials about Voldemort's return, and then bungling the attempts to fight him. Minerva McGonagall was given the position of Headmistress at Hogwarts, to no one's surprise. After all, she deserved it. And the school was doing as well as ever.

Draco went into the office of the Aurors who were assigned to domestic affairs department and slid his chair back. He was about to sit down when he observed that something was amiss. He frowned in concentration, his eyes narrowed into slits as he stored away the helmets under the table. He said in a low and dangerous voice, "Who took the Helderman file from my desk?"

Blaise smirked and glanced sideways at Dean. "I told you he'd know that someone touched one of the precious files on his table. No matter that it's messy and overflowing with debris, he wouldn't miss something like that."

Dean gave a long sigh and stood up, bringing the missing file with him. He laid it on Draco's table and said in amazement, "I took a file from under that junk on your table. How did you know it was missing?"

"Pure talent." He took the file from on top of the other folders and shoved it back in the exact place Dean got it from. Dean gaped at Draco.

Blaise looked back at Dean, shrugged and said, "Pay up."

As Dean and Blaise were arguing about their bet, Draco stole away, going outside to the unisex toilets located at the end of the corridor. He shoved open the door, surprising the couple who was busily snogging inside. John and Elia sprang apart, Elia hastily buttoning her robe. They hurriedly went out of the unisex, leaving Draco by himself. He grinned at his reflection in the mirror, thinking that the name of the unisex should be changed to the unishag. Perhaps multishag, considering the use a lot of couples had made of it. He went to relieve himself, then zipped his trousers and went to the faucets. He leaned against the counter, paused to cup a hand under the automatic soap dispenser, then rapidly worked the soap into a lather until he felt that his hands were logically clean. He continued rubbing for a few more minutes --- sometimes he felt like he couldn't be clean enough. He shook off the excess water into the washbowl before grabbing a few paper towels out of the dispenser. He was wiping his hands when he was hit by a sense of distress. Hermione, he thought, and dashed out of the unisex.

************

Hermione felt like she was hyperventilating. Harry and Ron had done nothing but look silently at her from the time she closed the door. She waited a few moments before inwardly acknowledging the obvious: they were waiting for her to start. Was this a pre-arranged agreement between them or something, she thought, forgetting to shield in her mounting panic.

Yes, it was. She was surprised at Harry's thought and her gaze shifted from a point just between the two men to him.

She was starting to hyperventilate and he knew it. After more than a year of knowing only of her general well-being, it felt good to know again what she was thinking and feeling. Harry took note of what she had been thinking and replied automatically. Her eyes were as wide as saucers and she was starting to look a bit ill but Harry hardened his heart. He had to --- otherwise, he would be a lost cause.

Hermione cleared her throat and started, "I know you've been wondering what I've been up to..."

"Wondering?" snorted Ron. "To put it mildly, yes, we were wondering what happened to you. No owls, no nothing. How did you expect us to feel, not knowing where you were? And you were away for a fucking year. Not even a howler."

"I had every right to go off where I wanted to, when I wanted to. I don't think I have to check in with you every time I feel like taking off," she responded heatedly.

Harry refrained from answering, guarding against the possibility that Hermione might feel overwhelmed with the odds of two against one. Instead, he let a little of what he was feeling escape, transmitting his mood to her.

Hermione felt a sense of despair projecting from Harry. She closed her eyes and let it flow over her and embrace her. She felt a few tears prick behind her eyelids and strengthened her resolve to stand her ground. It's not fair, Harry, she projected back. She was her own woman, dammit.

Being your own woman is different from being inconsiderate. The coldness of the tone that came from Harry's thoughts made her back stiffen defensively. She turned her back on them and fought for composure. Harry had a point, she noted. Calm down, calm down.

Hermione turned again to face Harry and Ron. She looked at them squarely in the eye, going from Ron to Harry, took a deep breath and said in a toneless voice. "I am sorry for making you both worry. I know that not leaving any word to two of the people who matter so much to me was thoughtless. But I think you know that a prolonged goodbye was not ideal, given that the situation between the three of us had suddenly become awkward. I'm sure you know what I mean and I don't need to draw you a map. Perhaps we can set another day and talk about this when we are all more in the mood for listening to each other. I am very tired right now and I don't think I can do this."

Ron noticed all at once that she had dark circles underneath her eyes. Suddenly, he felt guilty and defensive. His eyes narrowed and he fired back. " 'Become involved'? Why don't you just say it for what it is? You had sex with Harry and you left him, just like a one night stand. Call a spade, a shovel, or whatever Muggle saying it was."

Hermione almost burst out into tears during the first part of what Ron said but the second part undid her. She laughed helplessly as the hard coil of tension unwound itself from inside her belly. Soon, Harry and Ron were laughing along with her.

"I said something wrongly again, didn't I," Ron snorted in mirth.

Harry grinned. "Yes, you did. And for once, I'm glad."

The laughter gradually died down and the three of them stared at each other. The moment passed and grew into awkwardness.

Hermione gestured with a hand towards the door. "Would you like to set our talk for this evening, instead? Maybe we can go to The Bayberry for dinner, my treat."

Harry and Ron acknowledged her invitation with a nod and started to go on their way out.

She fought for composure and walked in silence towards her table. She sat down, holding her back stiffly until she heard the door close behind them. She slumped, burying her head in her arms. Hearing the door open again, she lifted her head and saw Draco, who crossed the room in swift strides and hauled her into his arms, where she wept until she was limp in exhaustion.

************

Draco had been standing still at the door with a hand on the door while he waited tensely for some of the thoughts entering his mind from both Harry and Hermione to show any signs of a conflagration. Caught in surprise by the sudden goodbyes, he had to backtrack a few steps and pretend to be casually walking by when Harry and Ron went out the door. As they exchanged nods, he stopped and dropped all pretense. Opening the door, he saw her with her face resting in her arms. When she looked up at him, he saw the agony there and, in spite of himself, he took her roughly into his arms and let her cry it all out.

Women! he thought cynically to himself, after making sure she wouldn't sense his thoughts.

************

Hermione was getting ready in her own apartment when the bell rang. She looked at the clock and noticed that it was too early to expect Ron and Harry. She had barely finished fixing her hair. Now who would be there an hour and a half before the assigned time? She hadn't even gotten out of her towel yet. She crossed her apartment to peer at the peephole. Draco? She quickly opened the locks on the door and swung it open.

She had already hugged him when she belatedly remembered that she was only half-dressed. Beckoning him to the sofa, she hurriedly dashed inside her room to get a robe.

Draco looked in the direction where she went and raised an eyebrow. He removed his jacket and carelessly put it over the armrest of the couch. Why was it that some women forget to dress up before opening the door, he thought in amusement, unbuttoning the sleeves of his shirt and rolling them up. He stuffed his tie in his pocket and popped open the button that held his collar fast. What if he had been someone who had designs on her and, without any thought, carelessly flicked open the towel that she had come out in? Not that he hadn't thought of it...

Realising that his thoughts had taken a dangerous turn, he hastily went to the kitchen and opened the refrigerator door, letting the cold air drift over his skin.

Hermione came out of the bedroom and looked for him. She stopped short at the archway between the living area and the kitchen. She saw him staring vacantly inside the fridge and was amused at the picture he presented. "Draco, if you're not getting anything from there, kindly shut the door."

At this, he bent leisurely and picked up a can of mango juice. Carrying it over to the table, he sat down, popped the tab and started drinking. Hermione stared, fascinated, as the bump in his neck bobbed up and down. She shook herself out of it and asked him, "So, what brings you here?"

He slowly put the can down and faced her, resting a foot over the rung of the next chair. She was sitting primly with her hands together, wrapped in a white fluffy robe. He smiled angelically and said, "I'm here for some moral support."

She looked at him suspiciously. He cocked an eyebrow and shrugged in a gesture of innocence. In the next moment, he grinned wolfishly. "Okay, so I wanted to see the fireworks."

"There won't be any. We're going out to The Bayberry for dinner. My treat."

"Serious bribery." He smirked. The Bayberry was the most expensive restaurant in the city. It had a waiting list an arm long just to get in. "So, who would you have to sleep with, in order to get in?"

She looked pleadingly at him and his alarm system kicked into place. Uh-oh.

"I know that you have the connections to get me in, Draco. That's why I called you up earlier in the office. Not that you were there but...anyway, where were you?"

He sighed gustily and said, "I was on a trip. It took me the whole afternoon. I didn't know you were going to call, your highness, and did not deign to return. In fact, if you noticed, I came straight to you." He did not elaborate any more on how he had been attacked just a few hours ago by a robed man and narrowly escaped being Avada Kedavra'd.

"Okay, okay," she said laughingly. "So, can I count on you?"

"Consider it done. And, Hermione...do be careful." Touched, she stood up, came around the table and hugged his head. Draco froze. He could not move for fear of his nose brushing something that his hormones might respond to. After a short moment, she released him. He shifted and crossed his legs. Damn.

"So, who's your date for tonight?" She teased. He looked at her and wondered how she could have grown up without knowing much about men and their sexual triggers.

"Well, I'll be seeing Freya tonight."

"What about that other woman, you know, the one who works in a Muggle office a couple of blocks away... Josh, that was her name, wasn't it? Odd that there's a female with a name well-suited to males. At the time, I thought you were dating a guy."

He shrugged and smiled insolently.

"Oh, yes, right. You don't go out with someone twice in a row. You keep them all on rotation. The more to keep them on a leash. Why don't you go and find someone? Someone who can be on equal terms with you?" A half-formed smile came to her lips, as she steadfastly refused to think why it mattered to her that he find his match.

"Because they're not you." He smiled teasingly at her.

A feeling of intense longing almost came out but he quashed it before it was fully formed. He was startled. Where the hell did that come from? They certainly didn't need more complications in their lives. He was satisfied with the current status. Hermione still had Harry and Ron to deal with. And he certainly wasn't looking for monogamy. An occasional lay was fine...okay, make that frequent, he amended. He was glad that he could keep his thoughts unobtrusively to himself when the situation warranted it.

"Why would I go and find myself an equal when there are so many witches who would be willing to serve me hand and foot?" He quirked an eyebrow and toyed with the empty can of juice, rolling it on its edge, around and around.

She looked at him, appalled. "Draco!"

"Dray-coh!" He mockingly imitated her. "What? Don't tell me you're surprised."

"Well, yes I am. I refuse to believe that you can treat women that badly."

"I don't have to, they do it to themselves."

"Not all women are like that." She lifted her chin stubbornly.

"You happen to be the exception. You could see through any of the pretences I would have wanted to use on you. Might be because we happen to share minds on the odd occasion."

The doorbell rang and their eyes met, startled. She went to the door and he went out along with her, heading straight for the couch. Peeping through the hole, she sighed. It was Harry.

She opened the door and Harry looked from her, still dressed in her robe, to Draco, who had lazily propped his feet on top of the table, making himself comfortable. Harry stiffened and Hermione let out a sigh. "Come in," she said. "Draco was just on the way out, wasn't he?" She looked at Draco warningly.

He heaved a sigh and picked up his jacket dramatically. On the way out, he dropped a kiss on her forehead and told her, "Good luck." He nodded at Harry and went out, closing the door behind him.

Harry stared at the closed door and said tensely, "Is there anything I should know about?"

"About what?" said Hermione, puzzled.

"Are you together with Draco now?"

"I was away for a year. What do you think?" she told him flatly.

He crossed over to her and she took a few steps back in alarm. He looked at her with hurt shining out of his eyes and she felt guilty at once. Harry...don't do this, she thought pleadingly.

"Do what? I can't believe you walked out on me in the middle of the night. What happened between us...it was the most wonderful thing that happened to me. I thought you loved me as much as I loved you."

"I do love you, Harry." He took a step toward her, his hopes rising.

"It's just that...I wouldn't want anything to ruin what we all had...have. You, me, and Ron. I've given up so much just to make sure that nothing would come in the way of our friendship. And when we..." she choked, "made love...it was heaven...and hell..."

The words stung. He turned away from her, and stood stiffly in front of the fireplace. He never thought that anything could hurt as much as her walking out on him but this was coming a close second. She followed him and hugged him from the back, tears escaping from her eyes.

Harry felt her tears seeping through the fabric of his shirt and felt a certain resignation. He could not really blame her for what she did.

"Hermione, Ron and I would have stayed friends even with a romantic relationship between us. It would have taken a lot of talking and a few punches, sure, but it would have come out right in the end. You shouldn't have left," he said sadly.

She bit her lip and felt the tears come down faster when he turned around and held her in his arms. She cried for the lost time, for the change in their relationship, for the distance Ron would have put between himself and her. Why couldn't I have been a man instead?

"If you were, I'd be very sorry."

She cursed inwardly for forgetting to shield. He tipped her chin upward with a finger while keeping his other arm around her waist. He lowered his lips to hers and she felt all the longing pour out of him. She was lost.

Harry bit her lower lip and slipped his tongue inside her mouth. She drew a sharp breath and felt desire shoot up in her. He started pulling out the pins in her hair and it slipped free onto her shoulders. Weaving his fingers into her hair, he kissed her passionately. She didn't notice that her belt had slipped and her robe was askew until their lips broke apart and his mouth strayed to her bare shoulder. She gasped and leaned on the wall as he kissed his way up back to her lips, paying special attention to her neck. His hips ground against hers and his hands travelled upwards, bringing the edge of the robe with it. Then his hands were on her bare bottom, pulling her towards him, leaving her in no doubt about his desire for her. He slipped his leg between hers and she had almost straddled him when the clock on the mantle started ringing loudly in her ear, jarring her out of the red haze of desire.

She looked at him frantically and said, "Ron will be here any minute. I've got to finish getting ready." She ran, belting her robe and straightening her hair. She entered her room, hurriedly took off her robe and slipped into a burgundy dress. She piled her hair up on her head in a French twist. She looked at her reflection in the mirror and sighed. She hastily applied some make-up to cover the fact that she looked liked she had just been kissed senseless --- which she had, but she wished it wasn't so glaringly obvious.

When she came out, Harry was standing in front of the refrigerator. She had a sense of deja vu but shook off the feeling. He looked at her and shut the door, his lips curving gently into a smile.

She looked at him warily. "Don't make the mistake of thinking that things are fine and dandy already, Harry. I don't think I'm ready for a relationship right now. I need some time and space --- I'm so sorry."

His face fell. She felt guilty as he took a step toward her, reaching out with a hand when, suddenly, the doorbell rang.

End of Chapter

Thanks to those who reviewed the first chapters that came out (prologue and Chapter 1): Clepsydra Delphinus (Cle!), HarryNZ (Harry!), calicutie11 (Carla!), JBob-a-licious (Jy!), Lily Vance (!), Ebonyink (Eb!), Lucky11 (Elia!), Smilie117 (Sabs!), ChrisMiss (Chris!), JessieAnnPotter, Unholy Deity (Deity!), Elliott, katherine1130, fluffybun (Lorraine!), Tamz, lore, A Shade Violet, Tezro, Truxy and Oracle (!)