The Dance

Looking back on the memory of

The dance we shared beneath the stars alone

For a moment all the world was right

How could I have known that you'd ever say goodbye

"Sirius? What are you doing out here?" Remus asked the still figure. He had come out from the graduation party in search of his friend. Faintly, he could still hear the shouts of laughter and the loud music seeping out from the Great Hall. Sirius should be in there dancing with every girl --and boy-- he could. Instead, he was out here, sitting on the steps, staring at the stars.

"Didn't feel up to the party," was the cryptic answer.

Remus snorted. "The day Sirius Black doesn't feel up to a party is the day the Marauders are innocent." He studied Sirius for a moment. The boy was quite a bit different from when he had first seen him. No longer was he immature and obnoxious, but rather fun loving and carefree. His long legs were sprawled across the steps, his lean body tense. The wavy black hair that was usually in a ponytail was down, not quite brushing his shoulders. Slow music came from the Great Hall; the last dance. "Sirius, it's the last dance, surely you won't miss that!"

Sirius looked up at him. "The last dance of our childhood is special."

Remus grinned. "Which is why you shouldn't miss it."

"I don't have anyone to share it with."

Remus was taken aback. "Of course you do. You're the most popular guy in school."

"All of them have someone special now. Now they want love, commitment."

Remus bit his lip. 'I'm going to regret this,' he thought, 'he'll charm me into thinking I love him. Or will he? He charmed me years ago.' Remus reached down and pulled Sirius to his feet. "Padfoot, may I have this dance?"

"What?" Sirius stared at him, his grey eyes wide with surprise.

"It's very simple. Me. You. Dance." He wrapped his arms around Sirius' neck. Sirius automatically put his hands on Remus' hips. Remus leaned into his friend's chest, breathing in his scent. Sirius smelled like that Muggle cologne he liked and the leather he was wearing.

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end, the way it all would go

Our lives, are better left to chance

I could have missed the pain

Remus sighed. This felt right. This felt perfect. Sirius was perfect. 'I'm falling in love. No,' he corrected himself, 'you've been in love since sixth year, you just didn't realize it.'

"Moony?"

"Mhmm?" Remus snuggled closer to his friend.

"I think ..." Sirius stopped, leaving the thought unfinished.

Remus looked up into Sirius' eyes. It was too dark to see what they held. Over his shoulder, a star burned brighter than any other. With a jolt, Remus realized the star was Sirius, in the constellation Canis Major. How odd.

Suddenly something warm was pressed to his lips. 'Sirius! Kissing me!' The smell from Sirius was even stronger than before. His hands curled around the darker man's neck as Sirius' gripped his waist.

Remus responded by kissing him back.

James slowly pulled away from his kiss with Lily. Fully expecting catcalls from Sirius and Remus, he was surprised when none came. As the music ended, James realized his friends weren't even in the Great Hall. 'How could they miss the last dance?' he wondered.

"I'll be right back, Lily. I want to find Remus and Sirius."

Lily rolled her eyes in exasperation. "Ok," she agreed, stealing a quick kiss. "I'll see you in the common room later, or else."

James grinned and moved to a corner, pulling out the Marauder's Map as he went. "I solemnly swear I am up to no good," he muttered, and when the lines were spread over the parchment forming the walls and passages of the castle he looked for the spots with the names of Remus Lupin and Sirius Black. There, just outside on the steps. "Mischief managed."

James worked his way through the crowds to the doors. "Padfoot! Moony!" He stopped when he caught sight of his friends. Slowly, a grin spread across his features. Sirius and Remus were kissing. 'Understatement Prongs,' he corrected himself, 'they're snogging.'

"Ahem!" he cleared his throat loudly.

His friends jumped apart guiltily. Both watched James as if waiting for a verdict. He gave them a winning smile. "About time you two got together. I've been waiting for this to happen. Now, if you two would be so kind as to accompany me to the common room I will be able to practice my speech. Unless of course you want to stand here and snog until some Slytherin finds you?" He peered at them over the top of his glasses, and was rewarded with a grin from both of them. He turned away, but still caught the look that passed between the two. A look of pure joy, and relief.

But I'd of had to miss the dance

Remus sighed as Sirius pulled him up to their dorm room. Sirius was laughing happily as they collapsed on his bed. They had spent three hours listening to James' speech then left him with Lily. Sirius now twiddled his wand to soundproof the curtains on the bed.

Sirius grinned and pulled Remus on top of him. Remus groaned softly as Sirius bit and sucked his way down his neck. 'I love him. Damn him. This feels so good. Shit. I'm going to get hurt, I can feel it. I can stop this now and miss the pain. No more pain, no more hurt. I could have stopped it a long time ago. I could have just pulled him back to the Great Hall and found some girl for him to dance with. But I'd have had to miss this.'

Remus awoke. He had chosen to sleep in Sirius' bed that night, instead of his own. He was aware, though, that he was fully dressed in his pajamas. It hadn't been anymore than innocent snogging, then. But did Sirius want to continue this longer? He looked at Sirius, still asleep and so delicate. Last night he had been afraid he was going to be hurt, now he wasn't sure why he had thought that.

"Good morning." Sirius smiled up into Remus' startled golden eyes.

"Good morning."

"Wake up!" James' voice rang out happily.

Holding you I held everything

For a moment wasn't I a king?

"And now, I'm proud to present James Potter, Head Boy," Professor McGonagall announced to the waiting school. She stepped down from the podium and let James walk to the front.

"Well, I suppose I must give a speech now." He grinned at the titters of laughter. "I'm not exactly good at speeches. Professor McGonagall seemed to cover everything that the school was about in hers, anyway. Education, hard work, and lots of time in the library." James continued with his speech talking about friendship and love, with significant looks to his fellow Marauders and Lily. When he finished, the Great Hall burst into tumultuous applause.

Amidst the clapping, Remus felt a hand clasp his. He looked to his side and saw the smiling face of Sirius Black. The raven head leaned forwards, and Remus heard a whisper in his ear.

"I love you."

Remus stared wide-eyed for a moment. "I love you, too," he choked out.

But if I'd only known how the king would fall

Hey who's to say you know, I might have chanced it all

And now I'm glad I didn't know

The way it all would end, the way it all would go

Remus yanked himself away from the painful memories. He stared blankly at the papers he was supposed to be grading. He glared at the paper that was on top: Harry Potter's. As if he needed that painful reminder. Immediately he felt guilty. Nothing that had happened was Harry's fault.

Harry. James would have been so proud of his son. The young Potter was a good friend, student, Quidditch player and more. He was intensely loyal and incredibly brave.

Buckbeak's execution was going to take place that night. Harry, Ron and Hermione would probably try to go down there, but that was not something they needed to witness. How to stop them? Standing down there would do nothing. Harry probably had James' old cloak... Remus suddenly grinned to himself. The Map, though, would show them no matter what. He dug around in his briefcase until he found the old parchment.

"I solemnly swear I am up to no good," he intoned, just as he had years ago. He scanned the grounds around Hagrid's hut and, sure enough, there they were.

Remus ignored the other two students he could see wandering around in the Entrance Hall. He watched Harry, Ron and Hermione go to Hagrid's hut and walk back out. Quickly he stood up; he would meet them in the Entrance Hall. Remus glanced at the map again and sat down hard.

'Peter Pettigrew? What? Peter is dead... isn't he? The Map's charms must be deteriorating. That's simply impossible, Black killed Peter years ago.

He watched in horror as another dot went bounding towards them.

'Sirius Black!'

Sirius had obviously tried to get Peter, and now he was dragging Ron and Peter into the Whomping Willow.

'Why would Sirius want Ron? But, what if . . .' Remus tried to escape that thought, but couldn't. 'What if Sirius was innocent? What if James and Lily switched Secret-Keepers without telling him because they didn't trust him?' Sirius! Sirius had suspected him, and that hurt worse than James and Lily not trusting him.

Without another thought, Remus raced out of his office. If Sirius was innocent... then Peter was guilty of the crime everyone thought Sirius had committed. Harry would go to live with him.

For a moment, Remus wondered if Sirius would want to be with him if he had the responsibility of taking care of a teenager. 'No time to worry about that now,' Remus scolded himself.

He set off at a run through the halls of Hogwarts. It seemed like it took ages for Remus to reach the Whomping Willow. Carefully, he prodded the knot with a stick and hurried deep into the trunk.

Our lives are better left to chance

I could have missed the pain

But I'd of had to miss the dance

"WE'RE UP HERE!" Remus paused at Hermione's voice echoing through the house. "WE'RE UP HERE-- SIRIUS BLACK-- QUICK!" He hurried up the stairs.

"Expelliarmus!" he shouted when he reached the room. Harry's wand and the two Hermione was holding raced through the air and into his hand.

He stared at Sirius. That man's once silky, shoulder-length hair was matted and tangled to his elbows; he was too thin, and his skin was waxy and pale. Sirius Black had gone through Hell and back again. Dark, emotionless eyes stared at Remus.

"Where is he, Sirius?" Remus asked tensely, already guessing the answer.

Sirius stared at him for the longest time. Then, slowly, he raised his hand to point at Ron.

"But then..." Remus stared at Sirius, trying to read the expressionless face, "...why hasn't he shown himself before now? Unless--" Remus felt his heart skip a beat "--unless he was the one... unless you switched... without telling me?"

Very slowly, Sirius' eyes never leaving Remus', he nodded.

"Professor," Harry interrupted, "what's going on?"

But Remus ignored Harry; all of his attention was focused on his former lover and best friend. He took a few steps forward and reached out a hand to Sirius. There was a flash of emotion in Sirius' eyes as he took Remus' hand. Remus pulled him up and embraced him.

"I love you," Sirius whispered. His voice was hollow and hoarse.

Remus stared at Sirius for a moment, his heart was beating wildly. "I love you, too," he whispered back.

"I DON'T BELIEVE IT!" Hermione screamed.

For a moment, Remus thought that she had heard their whispered exchange, but then common sense reasserted itself.

Hermione was sputtering at him. "You-- you--"

"Hermione..." he began.

"--you and him!"

"Hermione calm down--"

"I didn't tell anyone!" she shrieked at him. "I've been covering up for you--"

"Hermione! Listen to me, please!" Remus begged. "I can explain--"

Suddenly, Harry began to shout. "I trusted you," he shouted at Remus, his voice shaking, "and all the time you've been his friend!"

Remus caught sight of Sirius' eyes; they looked alarmed. "You're wrong," Remus began. "I haven't been friends with Sirius, but I am now-- Let me explain..."

Yes, my life is better left to chance

I could have missed the pain

But I'd of had to miss the dance