1,000 Days

Chapter 10

Harry

Harry looked up at the door to his office, hearing someone just outside. Quickly, he stood and rushed to it and opened it enough to look out. He saw Hermione at the end of the hall, running.

"Fuck," he whispered under his breath.

"What?" Draco asked.

"I think Hermione heard us," he revealed.

"What?" Draco asked. "How?"

"The door was open," Harry said, glaring at Draco. "I thought you closed this!"

"So did I!" Draco said in his own defense. "I could have sworn that I had."

Harry shut the door and rest his head against it. "What do I do now?" he asked.

"That depends," Draco answered. "If you want to apologize, you go after her. If you don't though, she'll probably think you really don't care about her."

Harry sighed. "Maybe if I break her heart she'll get over me," he said so softly Draco almost didn't hear him.

"Do you really want that?" the blonde asked. "After all, what if she never lets you see Ayden again?"

Harry sighed. "I can't keep lying to her, though," he said. "I can't keep pretending to be something I'm not."

"What are you trying to say here?" Draco asked.

"I've been thinking about it a lot," Harry began, "and I don't think I'm bi. At least not the way I was at one point in time."

"You haven't gone straight on me, have you?" Draco asked, a smirk on his face.

Harry chuckled, grateful for the joke. "No," he sighed. "I'm saying I think I'm gay. All gay."

"Then you need to go after her and tell her," Draco said softly, standing and walking toward Harry. He placed a pale, almost see-through, hand on Harry's back and rubbed it. "More than anyone else, she deserves to know."

Harry turned around and rest his back against the door. Draco hadn't moved his hand as Harry had turned so his hand now rest on Harry's chest. Harry felt as though the skin itself had grown a life of its own under Draco's touch and he wondered, yet again, how he let Draco push him away. Especially after this new discovery.

Draco seemed to be mesmerized by where his hand was. Slowly, he moved his hand to Harry's waist. Harry then brought his hand up to Draco's cheek before moving his hand to the back of Draco's neck and pulling him into a kiss.

There was a pounding on the door behind Harry.

Draco sighed and closed his eyes before returning to his seat at the desk. Harry opened the door.

"What the hell did you two say?" Ginny demanded, shoving her way into the room. "Hermione is in tears right now. She's too distraught to say anything to either of us. I need to know. What did you say?"

"Last night Hermione said that some day she'd be the one to fall out of love with me," Harry said. "Draco and I were talking about it and he asked me about what I thought."

"And?" Ginny demanded. "What did you think?"

"That, for her sake, I hope that day comes soon."

"Merlin, you are so stupid, Harry!" Ginny nearly screamed. "Don't you see what Hermione's going through right now?" Harry shook his head. "She's got you avoiding everything to do with Ayden, she's got classes that don't pay any attention to her anymore because they all know she's the possible wife of Harry Potter, and then there's you two! Merlin, you're so obviously in love that it breaks our hearts! If you don't want to be with us, fine," she spat, "but quit making us suffer! I, for one, refuse to be killed with all of your lies and bullshit!"

Ginny whipped around then and stormed out of the office.

"Does that mean she's left me again?" Draco asked.

Harry shook his head. "No, but if you're going to stay on her good side, you might want to leave her."

Draco nodded. "I think they're both at the same place. I guess we should get this over with."

"Does this mean that we're...."

Draco shook his head. "I'm still not cured yet," he said softly. "After that."

"So I may just lose you before I ever get you back is that it?" Harry demanded angrily, tears burning at his eyes. "I swear, if you fucking die on me I will bring you back and then I'll kill you myself."

"And then where would you be?" Draco asked softly.

"I'll bring you back again and we'll be happy."

"And I'll be a rotting corpse! I really don't see how we'd be happy like that."

"Maybe one day I'll figure out how to get it right," Harry said with a shrug.

Draco sighed. "Harry, you know I love you. I always will. The thing you've got to realize is, that if I do fail, I will always be with you. If the worst does happen, Harry, I want you to promise me one thing."

"Anything," Harry said in a near whisper.

"You'll go on. You won't be suicidal again."

Harry made a sound of frustration.

"Harry, I know you," Draco said quickly. "I know that with every death you're faced with you feel as if your own will be next, but if you make it happen, I will spend eternity hating you. Don't make me hate you, Harry. I love you too damn much."

"Hermione?" Harry asked, opening the door slightly to her room. "Hermione, are you here?"

"Go away!" he heard her yell from the bathroom.

Harry opened the door enough to walk in and shut it behind him. "Hermione, I've got to talk to you. It's...it's important."

The door to the bathroom flew open so fast, Harry was sure it had flown off its hinges. "What?" she demanded harshly. "What have you possibly got to say that I haven't already heard?"

"I don't really know how much you did hear," Harry spat angrily. He stopped himself before he said anything more out of anger and took a deep, calming breath. "But I know that there's one thing you didn't hear."

"And what's that?" she demanded angrily.

"Last night you told me that you didn't think I was as much into our relationship as you were. Well, you're right."

Hermione's face looked both offended and hurt by Harry's blunt honesty. Harry noticed, but continued nonetheless.

"Hermione, for a while I've been thinking, and the conclusion I've come to is going to either tear us apart completely or put a major rift in our already fragile relationship."

"Spit it out, Harry," Hermione ordered. "I haven't got all night, you know."

"I'm gay," Harry informed her. Hermione gasped and slammed the bathroom door shut. Harry ran to the door only to hear Hermione sobbing.

"Hermione!" he called.

"Get the fuck away from me!" she screamed. Her sobs could be heard so clearly and were so powerful Harry was sure she was going to cry until she either choked or threw up.

"I'm sorry," Harry said softly, unsure of whether Hermione had heard him or not. He sighed heavily and left, knowing that no matter what, they would never be as close as they had been nine years ago.

"Professor?"

Harry looked up from his desk to see Ron's son, Alex, standing in front of him.

"Yes?" he asked, abandoning his papers for the moment.

"Why was Hermione crying?" Alex asked.

Harry hesitated. What could he tell Alex that wouldn't bring Ron crashing down on him? What could he say that wouldn't put him in the way of Weasley Anger?

Harry sighed. "Sit down," he said. Alex obeyed.

"Last night Hermione and I had a fight," Harry said slowly, thinking of a way to tell Alex and not get himself into trouble. "Some things were said and we are no longer seeing each other. Do you understand?"

"Are you going to be Ayden's dad or not?" Alex demanded.

Harry sighed. "Yes," he answered. "I am going to be Ayden's father, as long as Hermione lets me. If she doesn't, I may never see him again."

"Why?" Alex asked. "What did you say to Hermione?"

Harry sighed heavily. "I'm afraid you're too young for me to tell that one to you," Harry said regretfully. "Someday, I promise, you'll hear all about it."

Either from me or Hermione screaming it to Ron, Harry thought helplessly.

Alex sighed. "Alright," he said. "Ayden's not going to like this. He wanted you and Hermione to get married so you could all be one big family."

Harry sighed again. "There was a time when I wanted that too," he said softly. "Go to class," he said suddenly, changing the subject. "You don't want to be late."

Alex nodded and left.

Hermione didn't show up for meals. Rumors in the halls said that she spent her classes telling the kids to read a chapter and then write a summery and then would spend the time staring out the window in tears. Harry was worried for her, but he didn't know what to do. He knew he couldn't go up to her and talk to her, she'd throw him out of the room in a heartbeat, but he couldn't let things remain the way they were.

So he decided to write her a letter.

Dear Hermione,

I know you must hate me right now, but I'd rather it be because you know the truth and not the lie I tried to fool you with. I want you to know that I do love you, but it's a different kind of love. You're my best friend, Hermione, or at least if you'll still be mine. I don't think I could take it if you dropped off the face of the earth again--especially not now that I know about Ayden.

Speaking of which, I'll respect any decision you make regarding my relationship to him. Recently Alex had told me that Ayden hoped for us to marry and be a happy family, and I know I want to be there for the both of you, if you'll let me, of course.

I'm sorry, but I don't know what to do right now. I wish you could understand and I'm hoping that one day you will. I want you to know that I didn't just decide I was gay, and it wasn't because of Draco. And, most of all, it was not because of you.

Love,

Harry

Harry sighed and read the letter. He'd left it sounding unfinished, but he liked that. It left a response open and possibly communication between he and Hermione. Though the more he read it the more selfish he felt it made him sound. He hadn't said one word to Hermione about what he had heard or how sorry he was for being the cause of that. All he had talked about was himself. He sighed and decided he would curse himself later for it.

He walked over to the stand where Hedwig stood and gave her the letter.

"I know she's in the building, Hedwig," he said, "but she's not really talking to me at the moment. Go give it to her."

Hedwig gave Harry a hoot of understanding and clamped the letter in her beak. She ruffled her feathers before taking flight through the open window.

She returned ten minutes later. When Harry took the letter from the trusty owl, he was afraid that he was going to find the letter he had sent, but Hermione had once again surprised him.

Harry,

I really don't know what to say to you now. Finding out that you consider yourself gay now was probably one of the worst and most painful things you could have ever told me, but I'm glad that you did, because now I am no longer facing a lie.

As for you and Ayden, I'm not going to stop you from seeing him. In fact, if you are going to be leaving the school after this year, I'm going to ask you to take him with you. I know I won't be leaving any time soon and Ayden deserves to be with his father if no one else. I hope you'll consider this and let me know as soon as possible.

As for being your friend, this is going to take some time. You've been the love of my life for more than ten years, and something like that isn't easily forgotten or gotten over. In all honesty, I don't think we'll ever be able to return to what we were when we were children, Harry, no matter how much it pains me to say that.

I'm sorry things didn't work out between us, Harry, I guess I was wishing for the same things Ayden was.

By the way, he'll be here next weekend. I'm going to tell him that we are no longer together, but I won't talk to him about living with you until you tell me what you decide.

Hermione

"She wants Ayden to live with you?" Draco asked after Harry had relayed the message of the letter to him. "What are you going to say?"

Harry sighed. "I don't know," he said. "I'm going to talk to Ayden about it."

"He'll be here tomorrow?"

Harry nodded.

"Can I meet him?"

"Of course," Harry said, shocked that Draco felt he had to ask. "Are you having any luck with your cure?" he asked, deciding that he didn't want to talk about the letter or his son any more.

Draco sighed. "No," he said. "I'm getting worse."

"This wouldn't be so bad if there was one set cure," Harry muttered.

"Believe me, I know. But it's not just that there's no cure, it's that there are only ten survivors."

"Only ten?" Harry asked.

Draco nodded. "And all ten are now dead. But they did get to be Elite Potion Masters."

"So if you find your cure..."

"I'll be an Elite."

Harry went to talk to Hermione the next morning before Ayden was due to arrive to talk to her about taking Ayden.

"I want to talk to him about it," he said. "And if he wants to come, I'll take him. If not, then..."

"Harry he loves you," Hermione said, taking a sip of her tea. "He adores you, you're his hero. To live with you would be his dream come true."

"I still want to talk to him about it."

"What about Draco?"

Harry looked at Hermione confused. "Draco's still with Ginny," he said. "Why..."

"Please, Harry, we can all see right through it. You two are still in love with each other and if he cures himself I'll be willing to bet everything that you two will get back together. You may have hidden it from me for years, Harry, but I'm not blind."

"He wants to meet Ayden," Harry said, giving in.

"Then when you talk to Ayden, take him to meet Draco."

No more was said, as Ayden had chosen that moment to come tumbling through the fireplace.

The boy looked at his parents confused. "Alex said you don't like each other anymore," he said. "Why?"

"Come here," Hermione said, holding her arms out for her son. Ayden walked over to his mother and wrapped his arms around her.

"Ayden, sometimes adults don't agree on things, and that includes mummies and daddies. Sometimes those disagreements can tear people apart. Your father and I still love each other, hun, but it's a different kind of love. Now, go with your father, he has a few things he would like to talk to you about, alright?"

"Does this mean that we're not going to live together some day?" he asked.

Hermione nodded. "Go with your father, Ayden."

Harry took Ayden to his room and sat him down to talk to him.

"I'm not going to keep teaching here," he said. "When the school year is done, I'm going back home. Your mother and I, we were wondering if you would like to come and live with me. You can spend summers with Hermione and when you start school we'll switch. What do you say, Ayden? Do you want to live with me?"

Harry's heart was racing; he didn't know what Ayden was going to say. Would the boy hate him forever for not being with Hermione or would he jump on the chance to live with one of his parents?

Suddenly Harry knew how Sirius must have felt when he asked the very same thing.

Ayden's face brightened up. "Really?" he asked.

Harry let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding. Ayden jumped up and threw his arms around Harry's neck. Harry started laughing.

Now to figure out what to do about Draco.

There was a knock on the door.

Ayden ran to answer it.

Draco stared at him in shock before he knelt down to get a closer look.

He looked up at Harry as he walked over. "My God, Harry," he said softly. "He's your spitting image, minus a scar," he added offhandedly.

"Ayden, I'd like you to meet Draco Malfoy," Harry said. "He is..."

"I'm the man who's going to marry your dad someday," Draco said with a smile. Harry smiled.

Ayden looked at Draco confused. "But you're a guy," he said.

The two professors laughed. "Come on," Harry said. "Get out of the doorway."

"So you're...gay?" Ayden asked after Draco and Harry had explained everything to him.

Harry nodded. "Someday you may have three dads," he said. "If your mum finds someone else, that is."

"So that's what Uncle Ron was talking about when he said you liked blokes," Ayden said thoughtfully. "But he wouldn't say anything when I asked him what he was talking about."

Harry chuckled. "Ron was never a fan of my lifestyle," he confessed. "He's still a little...off about it."

"Off?" Draco asked. "The man's a complete nut case when you and men are involved."

"Where are we going to live, dad?" Ayden asked.

Harry sighed. "I have a house in the country," he said. "It's small, and there's not too many people around, but it's a good little house. Maybe for Christmas I'll take you to see it."

"Christmas?" Ayden asked. "Really?"

Harry nodded. "Yes, if you don't have anything planned."

"Yeah!" he shouted.

Harry smiled. "Good," he said. "Now why don't you run off and see your mother," he said. "She'd love to spend some time with you."

Ayden nodded and gave his father a hug before he left.

"Merlin," Draco said softly, watching the door shut. "He's...he's exactly like you."

Harry nodded. "It's kinda scary, don't you think?"

Draco shook his head. "No, I think it's amazing."

"Are you having any luck?" Harry asked, referring to his cure.

"Not sure yet," he said. "I've got a potion in the making right now."

"I won't let you die," Harry said softly.

Draco scoffed. "Like you can stop it," he said. "If I'm going to die, I'm going to die."

"No, you're not. You're going to get better, and you're going to help me raise my son."

"Am I?" he asked, his eyebrows rising slightly.

Harry nodded and turned his attention to Draco's lips. Harry kissed him, grateful that Draco returned the favor, and promised without words that he would always be there.

~~~

AN: No, I haven't abandoned this...I've just gotten stuck... Anyway, don't forget to review!