Loony

At Hogwarts, Luna didn't understand why she had to conform. But she wanted to. Sometimes. Not always... but definitely every now and then, to get away from all the people that constant took the mickey out of her, to make them stop, Luna wanted to be normal. She thought this would never happen. She was always ridiculed. When she was in class, she'd see their eyes, mocking her silently until their owners leaned towards each other, whispering silently. She'd hear specks of their conversation and, as they pulled away, giggling, and glanced at her, Luna knew that she was the butt of another in-joke. What it was this time (her dress, her hair, her jewelry, or maybe just her in general), she wouldn't know. All that she knew was that soon she would be taunted with another perplexing insult. There's nothing she would be able to do; her scoffers lodge with her, and she never wants to show them a tear, never wants to give them the satisfaction that they've succeed in breaking her down.

*************

Luna liked the summer holidays. She lived in a predominantly Muggle town called Ottery St. Catchpole with her father. She loved The Quibbler. Sometimes, even she had to admit that her father's employees go too far in their research and articles. But to her, The Quibbler was much more than a simple magazine. It wasn't a favorite of wizarding society, but it became successful, warming the hearts of many with stories of Crumple-Horned Snorkacks and infuriating others with articles of the Ministry's Heliopaths. It wasn't the most popular or the most read but it accomplished what it had set out to do; influence the minds of people. In that aspect, it served as a role model for Luna. And she embraced it. It was her shield.

*************

Fourth year was supposed to be different. Luna promised herself that she would avoid her fellow roommates during the train ride to Hogwarts. Luckily, she was able to find an empty compartment at the end of the train, before the Hogwarts Express became too crowded. However, once she stepped inside, she immediately felt lonely. Luna wasn't meant to be an outcast. She wasn't a rebel or a recluse. She was, in general, a very sociable person. Because of this, having to endure an entire train ride by herself made her feel extremely lonely, and for once, Luna wished that she had a best friend, or least a sister, like Padma Patil had. However, to keep herself engaged, she chose to read the August issue of The Quibbler for the umpteenth time. It really was better than spending her train ride with her roommates.

Before the departure, a rather plump boy opened the door. He looked very weary and tired. Luna was unsure of what to do. She would have gladly like anyone's company, but she didn't even know much about this boy, apart from the fact that his toad seemed to want to get away from him as quickly as possible. However, the boy, upon seeing her, turned pink and murmured some apology. As he closed the compartment door, Luna frowned. He didn't seem like the ridiculing type, but he still seemed a bit embarrassed around her. Sighing, she went back to her copy of the Quibbler. However, she could not stay focused on the words. She could hear a voice outside her compartment.

"-Everywhere's full.... I can't find a seat...," said the boy who had just left Luna's compartment.

"What are you talking about?" asked a new voice. Luna recognized it as the voice of Ginny Weasley, a friendlier classmate at Hogwarts. Luna saw a pair of eyes quickly scan through the window of Luna's compartment. "There's room in this one, there's only Loony Lovegood in here-"

Luna's heart sank. Ginny had always been nice to her, so to hear her use the horrible nickname greatly saddened her. She felt her eyes burn. I'm not going to cry, she told herself. And then, she quickly wiped her eyes. Outside, Ginny was still talking.

"Don't be silly. She's alright."

This made Luna terribly confused. What kind of a person was Ginny? First she had insulted her in private and then she had somewhat vouched for her. Luna returned to her Quibbler and sought refuge in it, hoping that with every rune she decoded upside down, they would go away. It was too late though, and Ginny Weasley opened the door to the compartment.

"Hi, Luna. Is it okay if we take these seats?"

Luna looked up at Ginny and the two boys with her, hoping that her large eyes didn't look red. One was the plump-faced boy who she had just seen earlier. The other was a dark-haired boy with green eyes.... Harry Potter, Luna told herself. He was looking at her like a lot of other people did, probably thinking, like other others, that she was very strange. She noticed his eyes travel to her wand, which was stuck behind her ear. Well, that's a better place to keep it than in my back pocket, isn't it? I care about my buttocks' safety! Luna wanted to retort this to him. However, she just nodded at Ginny.

"Thanks." Ginny replied. She was smiling way too much. Wonder who her boyfriend is... Luna thought to herself. Harry Potter was a possible candidate.... Wasn't he best friends with Ginny's brother? She examined him as slyly as she could, trying to see if he was possibly in a relationship with Ginny. Harry shifted uncomfortably in her gaze.

"Have a good summer, Luna?" asked Ginny.

"Yes," Luna replied, "Yes, it was quite enjoyable you know. You're Harry Potter."

She wanted to get his attention as he seemed intent to look anywhere but at her.

"I know I am," he said back to her and the other boy laughed.

"And I don't know who you are."

"I'm nobody," he replied. Maybe he has an identity crisis, thought Luna.

"No you're not. Neville Longbottom - Luna Lovegood. Luna's in my year, but in Ravenclaw," Ginny informed Harry and Neville.

"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure," said Luna in what she felt was a very high pitch. There she went again. She hastily hid herself behind the Quibbler and cursed herself.

Stupid, stupid, stupid... why the hell did I do that? I just made an utter fool of myself!

She couldn't see Ginny, Harry, Neville, but from the silence, she guessed that they were all chuckling silently at her. She really hoped that they couldn't see her blush. As she tried to concentrate on the runes, she heard the boy named Neville excitedly explain to the other two about his new birthday present, a Mimbulus mimbletonia.

"Does it- er -do anything?" Harry asked, not looking very excited to see the plant.

"Loads of stuff!" said Neville proudly. It's got an amazing defense mechanism- hold Trevor for me...."

Luna was very curious. She tried to peek out from behind her magazine and watch Neville's demonstration. However, she quickly retreated behind her magazine as Neville poked the plant with his wand and jets of Stinksap started bursting out of it. Amazing defense mechanism indeed, she thought to herself as she felt the liquid splatter the cover of the Quibbler.

As Neville tried to reassure Harry of the Stinksap's low toxicity, a girl appeared at the door of the compartment. Luna recognized her as Cho Chang, a very popular fellow Ravenclaw that Luna had learned to avoid. Cho herself delicately treated her as inferior, but her friends spared no expense in silently taunting Luna's quirky lifestyle. There was no room for deviants in the society of Hogwarts.

In any case, Harry seemed really embarrassed as he greeted Cho. Luna felt embarrassed for herself. He looks humiliated because he doesn't want to be associated with the likes of me, thought Luna to herself. She had long ago tired of her wallows in self-pity, yet she couldn't control it. There was no one else to give her that pity.

Cho left and Harry just scowled at the Stinksap all over him. Ginny cleaned up the mess as Neville tried to apologize but Harry didn't seem like he wanted to hear it. He was probably angry or irritated that Cho had to see him covered with Stinksap and sitting with an oddball like Luna Lovegood.

Luna continued to read The Quibbler as Harry, Ginny and Neville started swapping Famous Wizard cards. This year was going to be the same as before... only with new mockers.

*************

The year really went by in a blur. Luna could never be bothered by remembering her everyday endeavors, but there had been many occurrences that she chose to remember. One was the first meeting of the D.A. .... Well, it wasn't the D.A. then quite yet, but it still was important. Calling Fudge wrong for his ideas, as her father often did, was one thing. But looking at what Fudge believed and taking action to prevent total collapse under the rule of the corrupt man was another. Sure, the material learned in the lessons was really useful for Luna, who couldn't wait to excel with them in her Defense Against the Dark Arts practical O.W.L. However, the principle behind the D.A. was what fueled her. Learning curses, jinxes, spells was nothing compared to accepting that Voldemort was back. Luna, having lost a mother, was used to the concept of acceptance. So, going to that meeting at the Hog's Head was important to her. So was the publication of Harry's article. It wasn't quite as important as the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks, mind you, but it was another step towards acceptance. This time, it wasn't an acceptance that Luna had to make, but one that the wizarding society had to accomplish. And it worked, didn't it? Judging from the student population, many finally believed in Harry's story. But that was not enough for Luna. After acceptance comes action. And Luna's chance to act came at the end of the years. Details were too many for that evening. Fighting Umbridge's Inquisitorial Squad, flying to the Ministry of Magic on thestrals, weaving through the Department of Mysteries, fining Harry's prophecy, becoming face-to-face with a whole group of Death Eaters, fighting said Death Eaters.... It was enough to make a person's head spin.

All five of her companions had lost something personal that night. Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny had lost a friend and a parent figure. Neville had lost the usefulness of his father's wand, which was a precious relic for him. What had Luna lost? A lot of her belongings. One would think that earning fifty points for Ravenclaw would have caused her peers to at least respect her. Sadly, this did not happen. The world that Harry and everyone else came back to from the Ministry was one that Luna was all too familiar with. However, all was not lost. Luna had actually gained a bit of respect from Ron, Hermione, Neville, and Ginny. And from Harry, she had gained empathy and companionship. Fourth year was a bit different after all.