I Saw My Lady Weep

Chapter Nine: You Leave Me...

The first three days of August passed in a blur. After the public spectacle of the award ceremony, it seemed as if Harry barely had a moment to himself. Along with Ron and Hermione, Harry was called upon to tell the story of their year on the run to friends, family, Ministry officials, and Hogwarts professors.

Some of the conversations, like the one he had with Minerva McGonagall, Harry would come to treasure for the rest of his life; the newly appointed Hogwarts headmistress spoke to him as an equal rather than as a teacher to a student, and it made him feel like it was all worth it.

Other conversations, like the one he had with Neville Longbottom, brought him to tears. Harry finally took the opportunity to tell Neville everything, including the Horcruxes and Neville's near-brush with destiny. Neville took it all in with a surprising calm. In the end, he merely shook Harry's hand and expressed his gratification at what he actually did rather than what he might have done had things been different. By the end of the conversation, Neville was jokingly referring to himself as the Boy Who Almost Was.

Lastly, there was the rest of the Weasley Clan. While Bill, George, and Ginny each knew some of the details, Ron, Hermione, and Harry had initially dreaded telling the entire family the whole story. None of them looked forward to telling Molly Weasley the details... she had more than enough to cope with, what with Fred's death. But they all deserved to know. What made it worth the telling for the three of them was the pride they saw in the eyes of the Weasleys when they were done. Thankfully for Harry, all of the interviews and storytelling was done by the evening of the fourth.

"Are you looking forward to tomorrow?" Ron asked. He moved a knight forward.

Harry's eyes wandered over the board for a long while. He knew through playing other people that his chess game had improved immeasurably over the years, but it never seemed to matter when he was playing Ron, who was a Grand Master at the game, even if he had never been officially recognized as such.

"Yeah, actually, I am. I'm curious as to what it is I'm going to inherit." Harry studied the board. He knew that Ron had a trap set up somewhere, but he just couldn't see where it was. Harry took his eyes from the board and watched Ron for a moment. His friend was studying the board, but with nowhere near the concentration Harry had just been using.

"Um... Ron..." Harry asked, more casually than he felt. "Are you ever jealous of the fact that I'm rich?" He wasn't sure he wanted to go down this road, but curiosity was getting the better of him. "You used to make such a fuss over everything..."

Ron looked Harry in the eye for a long enough moment that Harry grew uncomfortable. Harry was about to tell Ron to just forget it when his friend finally spoke. "I used to be. Won't deny it. You were famous, good at nearly everything you tried, on the Quidditch team your first year, despite never having seen a game much less played in one. Every girl in our year except maybe Hermione wanted you, and every boy in our year wanted to be you."

Ron was silent for a moment. Harry could tell he was ruminating. "Being the sidekick of the Boy Who Lived..." Harry could hear the capital letters, "...was old after a while. And of course, in our fifth year you turned into a complete and total git. On top of everything else, you being a git was sometimes hard to take."

Harry was at a loss. He wasn't sure what he expected to hear when he asked the question, but this wasn't it. For some reason, he felt an urge to apologize. But then Ron continued.

"And then I had this... what's the word. I don't remember. Oi! Ginny!" Ron's sister looked up from her place on the couch, folding her book over her hand. "What's the word for when you suddenly realize what's going on out of the blue, like? When you're not really figuring it out, but it just comes to you like a bolt of lightning?"

Ginny thought for a moment. "You mean epiphany?"

"That's the one. Thanks, Gin." Ron turned back to Harry. "Anyway, I had one of them things. I finally recognized what was going on all those times when we were younger and you were over for the holidays or during the summer. You know, those times Bill or Charlie would show up and do something big-brotherish for me or Ginny or even the twins and you'd just kind of stand there with an obviously fake smile on your face. You'd be happy for us, but there'd be something missing."

Harry's mouth was dry. He swallowed. "Yeah? What was going on?"

"You were jealous of me, Harry. Jealous of me and Ginny. You hadn't ever wanted to be famous, or rich, or have that scar, or be the subject of a prophecy. You just wanted to be plain old Harry, with a mum and a dad and maybe a set of brothers and sisters. I had everything you wanted, and you were jealous of it." Ron looked Harry in the eye. "Right?"

Harry just nodded in response. He felt like Ron fired a Stunning Spell off into his face.

"Right. So when I realized this, I realized something else: money and popularity don't really count. What counts is family, and friendship, and having a place to go where you're safe and secure and not going to have a pack of bloody-minded yahoos chasing after you all the time. Remember that Randolph Fisk-guy, the Muggle poet we read about in Muggle Studies? He said that home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in."

From the couch, Ginny interrupted. "Frost. It was Robert Frost who said that. He was saying that home, a real, true home, is where we belong, where everyone knows our name, where we can be ourselves, where we're wanted and valued and loved." Ginny's eyes caught and held Harry's for a long moment. Both Harry and Ginny abruptly blushed and simultaneously turned away.

Ron's eyes bounced from one to the other then back again for a moment. He smiled slightly as he continued talking. "Yeah, he's who I meant. Anyway, my point is this: I realized that your home was not with the Muggles. It couldn't be. Home is the place where you're reminded of what a special person you really are. The people in your home believe in you and love you know matter what. Your family hasn't forgotten the dragons you've already slain. They know how hard it is for you and work to make it easier."

"The only place that's happened for you is here. This is your home. We are your family. You're my brother as much as George and Fred and Bill and Charlie and even Percy is. So how could I possibly hold my brother's dumb luck against him? Not your fault your father came from a rich Wizarding family, right?"

Harry nodded, amazed that all of this deep feeling had come out of Ron. If it had been Hermione, or even Ginny, he'd not have been surprised. But Ron had never struck him as the contemplative type, and said so. "You came to all this yourself?"

Ron gave him a look. "Harry, just because I'm not as smart as you or Hermione doesn't mean I'm a bloody idiot... just means I'm slow to catch on sometimes."

"I didn't mean..." Harry stopped. Ginny had stood up and was stretching in that same amazing way a cat does. Ron watched Harry's reaction, and Ginny's stretch, and smiled again. For her part, Ginny seemed oblivious to the attention.

She picked up her book from the couch, walked to the table where Ron was sitting, and kissed him on the cheek. "That was very sweet, Ron. It really was." And then she was gone, up the stairs toward her room. Harry's eyes never left her. When Harry returned his gaze to Ron, after Ginny had disappeared, Ron was grinning like the cat that ate the canary.

"What?" Harry demanded. Ron's grin just got bigger at Harry's confusion. "What, do I have a bogie on me or something? Have I spontaneously changed colors?"

Ron tried not to laugh. "So... should I ask you what your intentions are for my sister?" He said it in joking tones, but Harry could tell Ron wasn't completely kidding. He wanted Harry and Ginny to be happy together, but Ron hadn't completely given up the role of protective older brother.

Harry was flustered. "What? "Well... I um... That is..." Harry wasn't precisely sure how to respond. "You see, Ron, I... Um..." He stopped talking and instead picked up his pumpkin juice. He hadn't been attending to it, and the ice had melted, but it was a diversion from the topic.

"When were you planning on asking her?" Ron laughed. "Have you bought her a ring yet?"

Harry's pumpkin juice tried to go down the wrong tube. He coughed uncontrollably for a while before gasping out, "Berk..."

Ron apparently couldn't hold it any longer, because he started laughing. The long hard laugh of someone for whom humor had been, up until very recently, a short commodity.

Harry pushed his chair back and stood. "Well, then this is a good time to retire. Have a good night, you huge bloody git!"

Ron was still chuckling to himself. "Good night, then. I'll see you in the morning before you leave."

XxxxxxX

Harry knew he should be sleeping. He had an important meeting with a solicitor regarding the trust fund his parents left him. It was an important thing. If he was going to stay awake obsessing about things, why not obsess about that? But all he could think about was Ginny and that stretch...

An hour later, he had counted every star he could see through his window, had recited every poem he knew by heart to himself, and still wasn't sleeping when an urgent need to get up presented itself. Harry sat up abruptly, fumbling for his glasses. He stumbled in the darkness until he found the door to the bathroom. It was, as usual for the Burrow at night, dimly lit with candlelight.

I can't fall asleep, but at least I can always pee, Harry thought to himself. He had consumed a great deal of pumpkin juice earlier. He finished up, rearranged his boxers, and then froze. Very, very slowly he turned around and looked at the bathtub. It was full of hot water, soap bubbles, and Ginny Weasley.

"Um..." Harry wanted to say something, but was having problems thinking clearly. "Ginny... Um..." He couldn't help staring, but then caught himself and locked his eyes on the wall just to the right and above her head.

"Couldn't sleep?"

It took a moment before Harry realized she had asked a question. His attention was fully taken up with not looking at her hands, and what she was covering up with her hands. Ginny was playing this very cool.

"Yeah, couldn't sleep. Were you in here while I used the..." Harry stopped. What an idiot question, he thought to himself. "No, Harry... I waited until you were in mid-pee and then Apparated myself and this tub full of soapy water in behind you while you weren't looking.

"Forget I said anything... That was a really stupid... Um... I'm going to go back to bed now, Ginny. Um... Enjoy your bath." He got out as fast as the dim light allowed.

XxxxxxX

Ginny waited until he heard his door shut before pulling herself completely under the water. Oh my God! Naked in front of Harry! I must have embarrassed him something horrid, she thought, guiltily. Harry had done his best to be the gentleman, but unfortunately there was one reaction he hadn't been able to control, and Ginny couldn't help but notice.

She ignored the flare of warmth that thought created. It was just the thrill of illicit activities that all of the Weasley children except Percy seemed to be addicted to. That was all. Nothing more. She promised her mother.

Next time I simply must remember to lock the door.

XxxxxxX

Harry Potter dressed in the clothing Molly had laid out for him the night before. The outfit she had selected wasn't quite a suit, but it was certainly better than what he was used to wearing around the house. He fruitlessly ran a comb through his hair, knowing it was a lost cause but trying anyway, then left the room.

On his way downstairs, he literally bumped into Ginny coming up. "Oh, Harry, sorry... I was just coming up for you. Mum wanted me to warn you that your eggs would be cold if you didn't come down soon. So... Consider yourself warned."

"Sure, Ginny." Harry smiled at her, nervous. "Look, Ginny... about last night. I wanted to apologize for... uh..." 'getting a good eyeful of your totally naked body' didn't seem to be an appropriate thing to say. Neither did 'having rather interesting dreams about you'. "You know... walking in on you like that."

"In a house with this many people it happens occasionally. Certainly wasn't the first and likely won't be the last time someone's walked in on someone else. My fault, really. I should have locked the door. I'm sorry if I embarrassed you." Ginny could see Harry was in agony about it. "We can talk about it later, if you want. Come on." She took his arm and began pulling him down the stairs.

Harry allowed himself to be pulled the first couple of steps, then fell in beside her. She was still holding his arm. The thought caused him to smile. "Merlin's teeth! I'm acting like a thirteen-year-old kid with his first crush. Snap out of it, Harry!"

The sight of the Weasley family gathered around the breakfast table eating and talking broke Harry out of his reverie. Ron and George flanked Harry's usual spot at the table. On George's right sat Charlie, and to his right, at the head of the table, sat Arthur Weasley. To Arthur's right were two empty spaces, then a plate full of food that could only have belonged to Ginny, and then Molly sat at the end of the table.

"Well, the man of the hour!" Charlie smiled at Harry. "Better get some food in you before you head for the solicitor's office. Who knows when you're going to get the chance later, right?"

Harry just smiled back and began eating. It was Ginny who spoke next. "Harry, are you going to the solicitor by yourself? Or is someone going with you?"

"Harry's asked me to come with him, actually." Arthur finished his breakfast and wiped his mouth with a napkin. Harry made to stand when he pushed back from the table, but Arthur waved him off. "We have some time yet, Harry. No rush. Finish your breakfast and take a moment, then we can be off."

Harry was nervous and excited, all at the same time. "It's a wonder I can eat anything at all, actually." He bit into his fourth piece of toast. "It's exciting! I mean, I suspect there's money, but I'm hoping that there's more too it. I'd love to have some things that were once my parents. You know... some Potter family heirloom that is accompanied with a note from my father that reads 'to be read only in the event of my death.'" He stopped talking abruptly and sat very still for a moment.

Ron put his hand on Harry's shoulder. "All right there, Harry?"

Harry looked up at Ron. "Yeah. Sorry about that." He wiped idly at a tear that had begun to form. Everyone at the table was quiet, looking at him. "It surprised me, is all. It's been seventeen years since they died. I guess I'm finally getting to the point that they aren't haunting me. Know what I mean? Seeing them right before the... Well... You know... It helped me a great deal. And now I truly believe that they're always going to be a part of me, alive or dead."

Harry didn't notice the knowing look Molly gave to Arthur.

Ron patted Harry's shoulder a couple of times. "I understand. Took me a while to get over my Gran's death, you know."

Harry looked around the table, and at the smiles that met him. Home is where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in. The thought came to him unbidden, from last night's talk with Ron. It was a good feeling.