The Toy Potioneer

The implications of failure were tremendous for Severus Snape, in whose hands rested the fate of the wizarding world. His pride and confidence now hung in tatters after one night with Bellatrix Lestrange. His very sanity was in jeopardy; no longer were his sins justified by the power they brought him, for his power was only an illusion. No longer was his guilt assuaged by hope in his plan, for his plan was no more than a joke in the eyes of his enemies.

'Only an idiot or a madman would appear before the Dark Lord in such a state,' he thought ruefully the next morning. His eyes had not closed, and his wand had not left his hand since Bellatrix left his chamber the night before. He scowled at the rising sun as though it would be the one to kill him that day.

But something--the deep and desperate desire for self-preservation, perhaps--compelled him to take his seat at the Dark Lord's right hand at the stroke of seven o'clock, just as he did every morning. Bellatrix was already there. Snape was all too aware of the glee in her eyes as they followed him across the room. He glanced at her as he sat down; she winked and blew him a kiss.

The Dark Lord strode into the room. He rarely gave even the coldest of morning greetings to them, or showed any sign at all that he noticed them; but today he stopped abruptly en route to his throne. He looked down at Snape, surveying him frigidly for what seemed like an hour.

Snape stared carefully at nothing. He was not sure that he was capable of even feeble Occlumency anymore. He tried to ignore the uncomfortable silence that rang in his ears, the dryness of his mouth and the wetness of his palms.

At last, the Dark Lord looked up. To Snape's astonishment, he was smiling.

"My, my, Severus," he breathed. "You look even worse than you did yesterday. Goodness, Bella, what did you do to my lieutenant last night?"

"Oh, it was great fun, my Lord," said Bellatrix, with a smile to match her master's. "Everything exactly as you commanded."

Snape frantically tried to clear his mind as the Dark Lord stretched out a hand to lift his chin, forcing him to meet his cruel gaze.

"I am always glad to hear of such obedience from my highest ranking Death Eaters. Sometimes I worry that power might go to your heads," the Dark Lord whispered. "But I need not worry about you, Severus. You would never dream of disobeying me, would you?"

"Never, my Lord," Snape said, but his words sounded as weak as he felt.

The Dark Lord grinned again. "I thought not." He released Snape's head and proceeded to his high, velvet-covered chair.

Snape felt as though he spent the rest of the day trying to catch his breath. Within an hour the cuffs of his sleeves were soaked with sweat. He fought the overwhelming urge to get up and pace, or else flee. As various Death Eaters came and went, he gave curt answers when spoken to but otherwise sat in tense silence.

Each minute that passed only made him more anxious. A million times he told himself that the next words out of the Dark Lord's mouth would be the Killing Curse, that the next thing he would see would be the famous flash of green light, with Bellatrix laughing in the background...

And a million times he told himself, 'Strength, now--you are only paranoid of being paranoid.'

'But if I am paranoid, then that confirms my paranoia! And if I am not paranoid, then I am merely being paranoid that I am paranoid. And--'

'Do shut up.'

'But the Dark Lord--he knows! Bellatrix has told him.'

'And what of it?' he told himself venomously. 'Whether he knows or not, you must press on. There is no alternative.'

'It cannot be done.'

'Tsk, I wonder what the Headmaster would have said to that?'

'What does it matter? I killed him. All for naught.'

'No friend of Dumbledore's should fear death.'

'It's not death I fear--only a death too early to--'

'Dumbledore took a gamble and trusted you. You must take the same bet, trust yourself.'

'But it is a losing bet. I murdered him.'

'No. He can still win the bet. You know it was the right thing to do. He said it himself.'

'And now he is dead.'

'Dumbledore gave everything for the cause, and you should do the same!'

'I already have given everything for the cause. Rather, the bit I had left for myself was stolen by Bellatrix last night.'

A pause, in which the memory of Bellatrix's laughter rang in his ears.

'I should kill her.'

'Do not. It would be foolish to attempt it.'

'What sort of path calls for Dumbledore to die, and for her to live? The Dark Lord's path, surely.'

'And the path of courage and reason, as well. You are the branching point. At the opportune moment, the paths will diverge and become clear to you.'

'No. No.' He looked across at the witch with such regal beauty. She was taunting Avery with her dark, narrowed eyes as he grovelled before the Dark Lord. 'I cannot control everything. Bellatrix's opportune moment arrived last night, and she conquered me. The path is set. Perhaps I could have prevented it... but then again--'

'Perhaps not.'

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"He hasn't said a word in three days, my Lord."

The Dark Lord leered down at Snape with cold red eyes. "He is done. Would you ever have imagined the Half Blood Prince sat so docile and without opinion?"

"Never, my Lord."

"He never went ten minutes without voicing some traitorous idea or another. But no matter--now he is loyal."

"Now he is loyal," echoed Bellatrix.

"Yes. Useless, but faithful. Much safer than the alternative-- useful but free."

"Why bother with him at all, Master, when you have useful and loyal already at your side?"

"My dear Bella, it is true that I may as well kill him. But do you disagree that watching him drown in his own fear is far more entertaining?"

Bellatrix laughed loudly. "My Lord, you are as right as ever."

"The best part of it is that Severus Snape was the very cleverest, and the best wizard of all our enemy, not to mention the most strategically valuable by far. And what a time for him to surrender! Just when Death Eaters have taken over the Wizengamot and infiltrated every major Ministry department, I have removed our last real obstacle. See, Dumbledore, your successor was no more fortunate than you were! Now your spy is disarmed and your Order is crumbling."

"Such a shame," hissed Bellatrix, delighted.

The Dark Lord stood and stepped behind Snape's chair, placing a long, pale hand on each of Snape's shoulders.

"A shame, indeed," he said. "Such a fine mind, only to be wasted on morals and decency and that fool's power, love."

"Oh, if only you had seen him, Master! I had him crawling like the pathetic little worm that he is--"

"You forget," said the Dark Lord, and he clicked his fingers.

Bellatrix's necklace rose from her skin until it floated in front of her eyes. She gazed at it for a moment and then breathed, "Oh, my Lord..."

The Dark Lord grinned. He clicked his fingers once more and the necklace drifted towards him, pulling its wearer with it.

Bellatrix sauntered over in the silver serpent's wake and settled herself on Snape's lap. She clawed at his robes teasingly, even ran a long red nail along his jaw; but he gave no response. "I wonder if he even registers that we're talking about him?"

"I do not know. But in case he does, I have a few parting words for him..."

While Bellatrix breathed into Snape's left ear, the Dark Lord leaned down and whispered into the other, "You have failed. You chose the losing side, and they lost because of your own weakness. They will never know that you were loyal to them. You will be remembered as what you truly are: nothing more than a spineless traitor. You have nothing left. You are done. From the shadows you tried to overcome me--now may you rot there!"

He straightened up, a cruel and triumphant sneer on his face. He beckoned to Bella and she rushed to his side. They turned their backs on Snape, who sat as silent as ever, staring blankly and compulsively around the room. He grasped her arm and they exited, laughing callously, to the Dark Lord's chamber.

Author's Note: Yes, this is really the end. I hope you enjoyed the fic. A big thank you to everyone who's been reading, and especially those who have taken the time to leave reviews. Feedback of any kind is always welcome and much appreciated. Anyone who would like to contact me personally can do so by private message or by e-mail, [email protected] . Thanks again for reading!