Happiness Is an Angry Weasley

Oh my God.

I kissed Malfoy.

Why on earth would I do something so horrible and... gross?!

There was something seriously wrong with me and I needed to figure out what.

Boys do not kiss boys. Unless those boys are poofs. And I most certainly am not a poof. I love women. I mean, I had crushes on women all the time. Fleur in fourth year and... and... well lots of others! I don't need to justify my sexuality. My straight sexuality.

Another very important mistake with this whole calamity is that Gryffindors do not, under any circumstances, kiss Slytherins. She may be the most fit Slytherin you've ever seen, and she may come onto you, but you do not kiss her. That is against the rules. It's just, well, wrong!

I ran back to the Gryffindor common room to find Hermione. Even if I didn't give her all of the details, she would know what I should do. She'd tell me how to figure out how to not want to kiss a Slytherin anymore.

I'll just leave out the fact that the Slytherin happens to be a bloke.

And Draco Malfoy.

Ew. I've just had a shiver of disgust.

I think.

When I walked in, Hermione was sitting in a corner with a few books around her. Good. I wanted to talk to her alone. If Harry was around, I'd be too embarrassed to discuss the topic of a forbidden snog.

I sat down across from her to try and catch my breath and noticed she was doing homework. Oh. Well she won't want to talk to me. I continued to sit there just for the sake of sitting with one of my best friends when she finally looked up and said, "What do you want, Ronald?" She only calls me that when she's frustrated. Damn.

"Well, I wanted to talk about something, but since you looked busy I was going to wait."

She sighed and shut the book in front of her. "I won't be able to concentrate with you sitting there. Go ahead."

Go ahead? Like it was an easy subject to just jump into.

"Right, well, er... It's... That is to say, I... and someone else... and I don't know what to do... because Slytherins... and you know the rule..."

"Ron, make some sense."

"Oh, okay. Er... IkissedaSlytherinandnowIdon'tknowwhattodo."

I saw her put a hand on her forehead, as if she didn't know what to do with me.

I cleared my throat and said, "I mean... this is hard for me to say Hermione, I'm a bloke, I don't confess my feelings."

"You have a bit of a crush on someone?" Now she was interested.

I shrugged. "I suppose you could say that. I... well, there's this Slytherin..." I glanced over to gauge her reaction, but she just looked interested. Alright then. "And I've been sort of... having odd feelings about this Slytherin for the past week or so. Today I had been planning to try to talk to the Slytherin after Charms, but when I pulled h... uh, that is to say, the Slytherin aside, I ended up kissing... them."

That was difficult. You never realize how much easier it is using specific pronouns until you need them.

I looked over, all of the worry and confusion etched plainly onto my face, and saw that Hermione was biting her lip. Good, she's thinking of a way to help me.

"Do you like this Slytherin?" she asked. I snorted. Doesn't she know about the rules?

"It's a Slytherin, Hermione," I said, as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"Yes. And do you like... them?"

I thought about it for a moment. Did I actually like him? I mean, I was able to tolerate him more lately. And I had kissed him. Perhaps I had some feelings hidden that I didn't know about until he seemed to be pursuing me. I had always had a sort of passion towards him, but it had only been anger before. I sighed heavily. "I don't know. Maybe?"

Hermione shook her head and sighed herself. "You're too confusing Ron. It's not a difficult thing to figure out. Why would you kiss this Slytherin if you didn't have some feelings for him?"

I shrugged. "A heat of the moment sort of thing?"

"Ha!" she exclaimed. I looked at her as though she had gone mad. What's so funny at a time like this?

"So it is a him. And I'm sure I know which him it is. Ron, why didn't you just tell me it was Malfoy? I can understand your confusion much better now."

I gaped at her. Speechless. How had she figured it out?

"It's a bit obvious, Ron. I am around you all the time, and I noticed how you objected to being partnered with him for a patrol. I also noticed that you've been very quiet since that patrol, so I knew something happened. If he had hurt you or cursed you or something equally nasty, you would've ranted about it non-stop."

I nodded. She was right. I was glad to have someone who knew how I was feeling and be able to decipher it into logical words and phrases.

But this whole thing is pretty illogical.

Hermione grinned at me, obviously amused by the internal torment I was feeling. I glared half-heartedly at her. "Talk to him," she said, "and if he feels the same way, perhaps you can... test out the relationship a bit?"

"What do you mean by test it out?" I asked.

"Well, I doubt Malfoy will want the whole school knowing he's... gay, and you aren't quite sure yourself, so... you could just have a sort of secret rendezvous every now and then and see how you feel."

I nodded. She made sense. What's a rondayvoo though?

Whatever.

She giggled and I looked over, glaring once again. "You're just so confused. It's adorable."

I glared and stomped off to my dorm. She shook her head as I went, but I didn't care.

I am not adorable when I'm confused.

Besides, I need to plan something.