The Road To Nowhere

Chapter Two

A Second Attempt

"At times life is wicked

And I just can´t see the light

A silver lining sometimes isn´t enough

To make some wrongs seem right..."

Creed: `Don´t Stop Dancing´

Sirius scanned the early morning horizon, noting how the limestone and marble of the pristine cathedrals contrasted with the first violent rays of morning.

June was hot in Florence.

He´d just arrived and already he was overcome with a sense of urgency. He had to get to Peter before the others caught up to him. It was the only way. He owed it to his friends that were dead and gone. The realization of the enormous responsibility he had to those he´d lost sat heavy on his shoulders like the humidity.

He replaced his shades and stepped from the sidewalk café.

It was here that the letter begged him to meet...Peter, he guessed. It struck him as odd that he would even try to contact him. After all, he´d given his best effort to kill the rat before, with witnesses present. He must be desperate if he needed to exploit this vein.

Sirius was positive that it was no forgery. Peter had written this letter himself. Sirius had grown accustomed to his style, to that of all of his friends, actually. Years spent passing notes under McGonagall´s nose was practice enough. And if it wasn´t for all of that, it was signed: Y~ (Yours, Wormtail). This was the way he´d signed anything that involved the Marauders. They´d all had their stupid little secret signatures. Peter was plying on his fond boyhood memories. What kind of an idiot did he take him for, Sirius wondered.

Then again, maybe he was the idiot for coming all this way to consult a known murderer and aide to the Dark Lord, killer of Remus, betrayer of James and Lily. No one knew where he was going. No one knew he was in Florence. As far as the private investors in this investigation knew, he was in Rouen, sifting through a dead trail of Death Eater activity. Minor stuff.

Yet, he had to tell them something. He didn´t want them barging in on this delicate scene. Who knew why Peter wanted to meet him? Why would he trust him? Why should they trust each other, it seemed like a ridiculous sort of face-off, but still he had to know for sure what this was all about.

He looked down at his watch. Peter was late. That, or he was setting Sirius up. Either way, Sirius wasn´t surprised. Both conclusions would be in typical Peter fashion.

***

Hermione sat rocking nervously in an uncomfortable waiting room chair. Harry stared blankly at the ground as Ron paced and tried to pay as little attention as possible to the others. His father was on the way over, along with Bill. His mother didn´t know. That would be up to his father.

It was his fault.

He´d set her off. He really didn´t know why he´d become so angry with her. It was just frustrating the way she sulked around and tortured herself. She hadn´t realized how much her behavior was affecting those around her. He worried for her. She was acting like a child. They´d all been through a lot.

True, he had no idea what went on in the cells of Azkaban while he lay unconscious but safe in a hospital bed. Harry had told him all that he could on the situation, but whatever happened to his sister when she was taken away from the others to speak with the Dark Lord (if that´s all they wanted, he was sure that there was more to the story), Ginny had been affected radically by the turn of events. She still had that scar on the palm of her hand and, apparently more scars underneath all of that.

He´d tried to talk to her about it. She was silent as the grave on that point. No one would know what happened in there.

It wasn´t as if he didn´t care for his baby sister, he did more than anything and that was what had him so angry. She´d tried to leave him. He was frantic at the idea of her leaving. What would he do without her? This was the second time her attempt at topping herself had failed. She downed a bottle of pills and chased that with a half a bottle of whiskey last Christmas, it was a close call, like today. Ron gave an involuntary shiver at the memory of it. She, of course maintained that it was all an accident and wouldn´t you know their parents had believed her. Not Ron, he knew her too well not to realize when she was bullshitting them. And she was.

There was no way to explain the slashed wrists this time around other than, "Damn, if only I could bleed a little faster." It all made him so angry. They would have to believe him this time. She needed help!

Ron was shaken from his thoughts when he´d caught a movement from the corner of his eye. It was Harry who´d silently gotten to his feet and headed in the direction of the cafeteria. Hermione continued her methodical rocking and Ron continued his pacing.

The doctor emerged from Ginny´s room.

Ron rushed over to inquire after her. "Critical but stable," was the stoic answer he received. He immediately went in to see his sister who was asleep. Bandaged and pale, she looked helpless.

Ron vowed then that he would do all that he could for her to bring her back from that dark and scary place she´d wandered into. In the last year she´d nearly died at the hand of You-Know-Who and had tried to kill herself twice. He would make sure that didn´t happen again. He would protect her if it were the last thing he ever did on earth.

***

Ginny was awake long before she´d opened her eyes. Images had been haunting her since well before the end of fifth year. At first she thought that she was simply going crazy. Her mother had told her of others in their family who had gone clinically insane. It wasn´t such an improbable explanation for things she rationalized.

No, she now knew that it was the future she was seeing: a terrifying future, dark and hopeless. How many people, she often wondered, where plagued with this frightening gift. It was awful, the vision she´d seen just before...

Oh, damn it! Ginny knew then that she hadn´t succeeded in killing herself. The pain she was feeling was very real. She had failed. She always failed. Was there anyway she could get out of all of this? Killing herself wasn´t working. She´d already tried it twice to no avail. It seemed to her a hopeless case, fate had picked her to carry the burden, become the traitor. The blood of those she loved was already a crimson stain on her hands. There was seemingly nothing she could do about it. As the centaurs would always say, "It´s written in the stars and the stars never lie. And they can never be changed."

She always thought that was a load of crap but now as she´d tried to change them, to rewrite the future, delete herself from the picture. A chilling reality washed over her. They were right.

She slowly opened her eyes to the familiar view of the hospital room. St. Mungo´s, she was getting to know this place very well. In the past year alone she had made three visits here. She´d been to the morgue with her father to identify the body of her older brother. She´d volunteered as a medical assistant when the hospital was overcrowded and understaffed after the double attack on Hogwarts and the Ministry. She´d also been a patient here when she´d overdosed on sleeping pills and alcohol.

She would always maintain that it was an accident. She didn´t want the worry that her family always heaped on her when they´d thought she was in trouble. Yes, she was in over her head, but she was working on a way out, if they would just stop interfering. She wondered whom she would have to be eternally grateful to for yet another heroic save.

Probably Ron. He was the one that found her on Christmas. She still hadn´t forgiven him for it. She knew that the "accident" story didn´t fly with him. He was virtually the only one who knew when she was lying. She´d have to work on hiding it better. She knew that he was angry with her for causing such a scene, with his friends present no less. She was sorry for it. He wouldn´t understand the truth though, even if she explained it to him. None of them would understand, well maybe Hermione would. But this was Ginny´s problem and she would deal with it on her own.

"I´m so sorry, Ginny," she heard, turning her head to see Ron seated by the side of her bed. "I didn´t mean to drive you to this. I´m worried about you. I love you, you know that right?" He seemed on the verge of a breakdown, she had to say something. She couldn´t stand to see him looking so miserable.

"I know you do, Ron," she said weakly. Her head pounded. Was that what severe anemia felt like? Ginny made a mental note: never try to off myself this way again, too painful.

Ron quickly lifted his head at the sound of her voice. He hadn´t realized that she was awake. A wave of relief passed over his features as he reached over and took one of her tightly bandaged hands in his own.

"Forgive me, Ginny. I was being stupid. I didn´t mean---," Ron pleaded, but stopped as Ginny held up her other bandaged hand to stop him.

"No, Ron. You didn´t do anything. I was acting stupid. I just--,"she trailed off unable to find the words she needed to express her guilt in trying to leave him. She knew that her family adored her, Ron in particular, but she had to leave, to keep them safe. She knew she couldn´t make herself understood so she just left it alone.

"You wouldn´t understand," Ginny admitted with a feeble shake of her head.

"I would Ginny. I would understand if you just told me what was going on. Ginny I want to help you," Ron persisted. Ginny smiled. She knew he would try if she could bring herself to tell him. But she couldn´t run the risk that he would be horrified by what she had to say. She couldn´t let him help her. There was nothing he could do, nothing anyone could do. Everything had already started to crash down around her little by little. It had happened in Azkaban. She didn´t want to take anyone down with her, especially Ron.

"Maybe someday you´ll understand, Ron," Ginny said in what she hoped was a confident voice. "But not now. I can´t tell you now."

***

Harry still sat shocked and staring at the floor, but at least here in the cafeteria he didn´t have to listen to the creaking of Hermione´s chair as she rocked back and forth methodically. Ron´s pacing was becoming maddening as well.

There were very few people around, Harry noticed a few nurses loitering in one corner of the large room, a doctor that had just hurried out, and a small girl a few tables over who was talking to a house-elf. Harry tried not to stare because that would be rude, but she did distract him from the less pleasant thoughts of Ginny bleeding to death all over the rug in her bedroom. Of course, they were all assured that she was fine and would make a complete recovery, but she could have easily died all the same.

Harry amused himself with watching the girl as she giggled next to the tiny elf with large eyes and two tiny cat-like ears. It appeared as though they were making fun of the nurses in the corner. The elf would point in their direction and mutter something incoherent that girl would find exceedingly amusing and then they would both snigger and clap their hands over their mouths to stifle the uncontrollable laughter. The girl was younger than Harry, he could tell just by looking at her. Her hair framed her face in silver-blond pin curls that shook when she laughed. She had bright eyes and a broad, cheery smile that lit up her otherwise pale face.

Harry couldn´t help but smile at the eccentricity of it all. Who would sit in the cafeteria of a hospital with their friend, a house-elf, and laugh at people? These two were the most interesting creatures that Harry had ever laid eyes on. And despite the fact that she´d looked up and seen him staring, he couldn´t take his eyes off of her. A few seconds later, the girl had sent the house-elf away. Harry watched as the small creature in a tea towel darted out of the room to execute her order.

Harry returned his eyes to the floor when he noted that the girl was coming over to his table. He couldn´t help but notice as she moved to the place where he sat that she was in a wheelchair, the first person he´d actually seen in the wizarding world that was wheelchair bound. He was very curious as to how she had come to be like that but thought it too impertinent to ask. Seeing her up close reminded Harry of a little girl he used to see on television sometimes when Aunt Petunia let him watch, a small girl that sang and tap-danced in old black and white films. She had the same halo of silver curls and round, smiling face. Aunt Petunia used to say that the little dancing girl looked as sweet as a baby angel. Harry was beginning to think she might be right. He was seeing an angel now.

She stopped in front of him and cocked her head, staring boldly at him. Harry stared back. She reminded him of someone he knew in an odd sort of way. It was the eyes, he gathered, he got the most eerie feeling from them. Eyes like hers don´t belong to angel faced girls in ringlets, they had a cold, metallic glint that was somewhat softened by her smile. She smiled at him as if she knew some amusing and incriminating secret.

"Staring is rude, did you know?" she said in a know-it-all sort of tone, very much like Hermione.

"Pointing at people and laughing at them is rude, did you know?" Harry shot back with a smile. He had nothing better to do, Ginny wasn´t awake yet, why not play along?

"It happens to be my favorite pastime. I look forward to coming for physical therapy every week because Portia and I find the yuppie doctors and nurses amusing. Did you know that you have blood down the front of your shirt? You´re not hurt, I hope," she said wide eyed at the end of her sentence as if she´s just noticed it. Her concern was well received with a smile.

"No," Harry answered with a shake of his head, "not mine."

"It isn´t?" she asked in an off hand tone and then added more urgently with a look of intrigue lighting her face, "did you kill someone?"

Harry had to laugh. He appreciated that she was trying to cheer him up. Maybe she was an angel after all. Or at least a blessing sent to lessen a trial.

"I didn´t kill anyone. It´s a friend´s. She tried to kill herself," he didn´t see why he needed to skirt the issue. He didn´t know her anyway. What would be the harm in talking a bit with a kind stranger about the whole ordeal?

"How is she now?" the girl said, raising her eyebrows. Her smile disappeared.

"Not awake yet. But the doctor said she´d make a full recovery," Harry added trying to ease her alarm somewhat. It was touching, her concern for someone she´d never even met. "I don´t know why she did it."

"Don´t you?" she asked, "She never gave you a hint as to why?"

Harry shook his head.

"I know you don´t know me, but I know what it feels like to be in that position. May I give you some advice?" she asked speaking in measured tones, but surprisingly un-psychiatrist like, "Keep a close watch on her, but don´t make it seem like you´re crowding her. Listen to her when she´s ready to talk, but don´t push her into explaining it all." Harry was curious as to how a girl of her age, around thirteen or fourteen, knew so much. As if reading his thoughts she added with a sympathetic smile, "I´ve been the worried friend before. It´s a touchy situation, I know, but not hopeless."

That´s exactly how Harry was feeling. Who knew thirty minutes ago that he would walk into this nearly deserted cafeteria and find her? She´d calmed his fears and cheered him up and left him wondering how she did it all so effortlessly. Her smile had healed him.

"Who are you?" Harry asked and then winced. He hadn´t meant to sound rude.

She gasped and then blushed slightly, "How rude of me. I´m sorry I never introduced myself. I´m Lucy," she thrust out her hand and Harry took it automatically, "Lucy--."

She wasn´t able to finish as Hermione came up behind Harry asking him to come back immediately. Ginny was awake. Harry nodded hurriedly and turned to excuse himself. Lucy stared amusedly at Hermione, as if she knew secrets about her as well.

"Forgive me, I have to--," Harry began and was silenced in turn by the cold and decisive voice of Lucius Malfoy. Harry was surprised to see him and became suddenly uneasy, nothing good ever happened when Lucius Malfoy showed up. The look on Hermione´s face told him she was thinking the exact same thing.

"Lucilla," he said in a bored monotone, not registering the two people standing beside the girl in the wheelchair, "we´re leaving." He turned promptly and disappeared through the door he´d just entered.

So she was a Malfoy?

She confirmed his fear when she turned timidly and said, "It was lovely meeting you, Harry."

Harry was stunned. No way she could be related to the Malfoys. She was too sweet. "You know my name?" was all he could manage under the circumstances.

"Of course I do, everyone does." Harry came to the realization that it was true. There weren´t many people in the wizarding community that didn´t know his name. That was annoying. "I´d better get going. It was nice talking to you anyway. I hope your friend is well soon," she said with a smile before she looked down at the ground and left the cafeteria after her father.

Harry and Hermione exchanged wide-eyed looks.

***

Sirius watched as the owl alighted then disappeared past the bell tower of the large church on the corner. When he could distinguish no more between it and the pigeons on the horizon, he turner to the letter it had delivered him.

Peter´s handwriting filled one line on the folded parchment.

Take the stairs at the back of the hotel to room 216.

Sirius shook his head slightly, resenting the cat and mouse chase, well, dog and rat chase to be more precise. Did Peter want his help or was he making him jump through hoops before he ambushed him? Sirius was prepared for both scenarios, although he still hadn´t decided what he was going to do if he actually came face to face with Peter. His betrayal still burned like fire. Sirius was still full of vengeance for his dead friends.

He tore the paper into small bits and deposited it into the café´s waste paper bin and made his way to the back of the hotel.